Guest guest Posted May 6, 2012 Report Share Posted May 6, 2012 Rhonda, I don't have info about the ian center but i think you are on the right track about going for partial hosp. Would he be a candidate for in WI, where they could focus on the OCD primarily? If there is a waiting period, then you would need to find some program, right? From my exp. with another son who had psychotic break in Jan. They released him home still in the acute stage. I had to wait a week before I could get him into an IOP,1/2 day program or even see a pdoc. Medications were not right. He was agitated, not a good situation. The IOP pdoc felt he was too acute for the program but since we couldn't find anything else, he stayed there and eventually kind of participated. We really didn't get the right meds. til he got in to the first psychosis program, but that didn't give him any structured programming, just the pdoc and optional 1x/wk peer group. He is pretty stable now, with his individual therapy psychosis program, just trying to cope with the BP diag. My son has BP and the house does not have triggers for his condition, other than my husband. Since the house has alot of triggers for your son, I would think it would be best if he could be in some kind of program to stabilize him before he comes home since being at home will be a big challenge for him. I know with myself, I had anorexia in HS (which some say is a variant of OCD) and the house/family was a trigger for me. When I left there after HS, it was easier for me to work on the anorexia. Didn't plan on this being so long of a post but I feel for your situation and hope you can find some program for your son. It is heartbreaking to want to help them and run into so many roadblocks. > > Hey Tara - I see you are from Chicago! Do you happen to know anything about the ian Brothers Behavioral Health Center there? That might be an option for my son for partial hosp. I have no idea where he would stay - do you have any suggestions? > > thanks! > Rhonda > > Re: Any advice? > > > > In 1st grade my son who was then 6 began crying during the day in school, it was completely disruptive. > > We had more trouble on Mondays than other days. Some time I just took him with my in the morning to the library, and then tried to bring him in at lunch time. It was all he could tolerate. The private therapist supported this. Other days in the week were less difficult, but Mondays were the worst. So making the day shorter was helpful. The whole thing lasted a few months, and I pulled him a total of 4 or 5 times. It was helpful during the crisis for coping. > > Then the therapist suggested scheduling his in-school Social work session for first thing Monday morning. It was so helpful for him to start the day in her office playing a game and talking. Maybe an in-school social worker can help with coping? > > If the classroom teacher is not experienced with OCD, the responses can make anxiety worse. We and the teacher used to say, " Don't worry about x, it will never happen. " But the OCD mind will always search for the outrageous possibility that x WILL happen. And he felt compelled to obsess and debate those possibilities endlessly. Instead, we learned responses to help diffuse the anxiety. " Yes that is possible, but it has never happened in 20 years in this classroom, so the odds are pretty good it won't happen today. And if it does, I will be here to help you through it. " The OCD person has to learn to tolerate a degree of uncertainty. > > I will say a rather silly but effective strategy was humor. We went a bought a few joke books. When he was feeling really jazzed up the teacher could ask him to get his joke book and tell a few knock knock jokes. Once he got giggling the anxiety really settled down. > > Another factor we learned in retrospect... in 1st grade my son had to walk into class alone (without parents). Separating at the door was so hard. He would hold it together for a while, then fall apart in class. We completely changed the routine in 2nd grade. I walked him all the way to the classroom to meet his teacher. He asked her any questions that were worrying him, and settled those right away. Then he told her a knock knock joke. This took all of 3 minutes, and he happily separated and completed full school days. Without any meds- therapy and these routine changes turned around his day completely. He was also placed into a more challenging math group- it was a better fit and somehow this helped as well. > > Maybe something here will be useful for you. OCD does wax and wane, so when things are very difficult take a deep breath and remember that in three weeks it may look completely different than it does today. OCD is a mysterious fellow. > > Good luck, > Tara from Chicago > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 6, 2012 Report Share Posted May 6, 2012 Hi Rhonda, Just reading your post to and wanted to jump in and ask if the person who could take your son ASAP would work with him intensively, or come to your home? If this is available now and your son is coming home now, I would consider this to help bridge the time, or perhaps as the main person if it ends up being a good fit. Not sure the financial aspect of this though. Bottom line, if you can get someone with enough expertise, and your son is on board to do the ERP, it just needs to be done intensively enough to get it moving. Not sure with the home issues what's best, but ours was the same, re own chair, everything contaminated, I was contaminated, couldn't touch anything etc. When medication kicks in more, some of this might subside. But it IS a forced exposure, and if he is away from it all, it may still be an issue to come back to it. Ideally, all this is addressed in the home - if only we all had this ideal The challenge with inpatient treatment is, when they come out there is not the same supervision, and/or adequate follow up care. So, either way, at some point the individual has to take it on and run with it. Inpatient can sure turn things around though, so if you can get it jump on it. RE son's bedroom etc, I would leave it and let him do whatever he needs to, ie sleep on a mattress somewhere else maybe, but expect that he will eventually be able to sleep in his bed. Have to let them do what they need to, but communicate the idea that they WILL be able to .... They will always feel that they cannot. Contamination stuff is wicked, cuz the whole house is suspect. But the more you accommodate this it's just going to keep getting bigger. Does your son acknowledge this aspect of the OCD? If you are able to talk about this, even if he can't do anything about it yet, so he can see the direction he needs to head in. Sorry, I haven't been reading posts as much lately, so I don't know, when does your son come home? Hugs to you. Hang in there! Barb > > > > Hey Tara - I see you are from Chicago! Do you happen to know anything about the ian Brothers Behavioral Health Center there? That might be an option for my son for partial hosp. I have no idea where he would stay - do you have any suggestions? > > > > thanks! > > Rhonda > > > > Re: Any advice? > > > > > > > > In 1st grade my son who was then 6 began crying during the day in school, it was completely disruptive. > > > > We had more trouble on Mondays than other days. Some time I just took him with my in the morning to the library, and then tried to bring him in at lunch time. It was all he could tolerate. The private therapist supported this. Other days in the week were less difficult, but Mondays were the worst. So making the day shorter was helpful. The whole thing lasted a few months, and I pulled him a total of 4 or 5 times. It was helpful during the crisis for coping. > > > > Then the therapist suggested scheduling his in-school Social work session for first thing Monday morning. It was so helpful for him to start the day in her office playing a game and talking. Maybe an in-school social worker can help with coping? > > > > If the classroom teacher is not experienced with OCD, the responses can make anxiety worse. We and the teacher used to say, " Don't worry about x, it will never happen. " But the OCD mind will always search for the outrageous possibility that x WILL happen. And he felt compelled to obsess and debate those possibilities endlessly. Instead, we learned responses to help diffuse the anxiety. " Yes that is possible, but it has never happened in 20 years in this classroom, so the odds are pretty good it won't happen today. And if it does, I will be here to help you through it. " The OCD person has to learn to tolerate a degree of uncertainty. > > > > I will say a rather silly but effective strategy was humor. We went a bought a few joke books. When he was feeling really jazzed up the teacher could ask him to get his joke book and tell a few knock knock jokes. Once he got giggling the anxiety really settled down. > > > > Another factor we learned in retrospect... in 1st grade my son had to walk into class alone (without parents). Separating at the door was so hard. He would hold it together for a while, then fall apart in class. We completely changed the routine in 2nd grade. I walked him all the way to the classroom to meet his teacher. He asked her any questions that were worrying him, and settled those right away. Then he told her a knock knock joke. This took all of 3 minutes, and he happily separated and completed full school days. Without any meds- therapy and these routine changes turned around his day completely. He was also placed into a more challenging math group- it was a better fit and somehow this helped as well. > > > > Maybe something here will be useful for you. OCD does wax and wane, so when things are very difficult take a deep breath and remember that in three weeks it may look completely different than it does today. OCD is a mysterious fellow. > > > > Good luck, > > Tara from Chicago > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 6, 2012 Report Share Posted May 6, 2012 Hi Rhonda, glad to hear he came home for a short visit. I've forgotten, how old is he? Doesn't sound like he's quite ready to return home yet, have they said when he's being discharged/date? Depending on age, I think he should be involved in what is expected of him upon returning home. Like, he may refuse at first to sleep in his room, but should know that at a later point that is something he WILL be working on in therapy, sort of know what is expected to work on immediately upon return, such as XX showers a week, and what's down the road; and that it all is for HIM and his recovery from having OCD bully him around. Does he " get " that it's all OCD, or still think with dad issues/contam that some isn't OCD? Glad you found someone who can see him ASAP. Medicaid may have a " number of visits " limit, but generally therapists can put in to increase the number based on need, so can get an override hopefully. It does seem he's made some good progress since he's been there, so hopefully that just crosses over to making the rest easier to work on too! Keep us updated, > > Thanks , I am so tired of thinking about this, it's a break to hear your thoughts!! It sounds like my son is going to be released about the same place where your son was. Hey, your son survived, so maybe mine will too. > > House having triggers is an issue, but he came home yesterday for first time and he was in same room with Dad for 1/2 hour, and was able to sit and keep working on laptop. He played video games on laptop the whole time to distract himself. However he would not sit in any chair except his chair and says he will not sleep in his bed or bedroom since we moved it across the hall (we did this with his knowledge and the consent of SW). > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 7, 2012 Report Share Posted May 7, 2012 Home, wow, keep us updated. I hope he brings home with him his successes to grow on! Also hope he can manage less anxiety around dad and dad's BPD, realize that that is DAD'S disorder/problem to work on and maybe learn to ignore/shrug it off as " just dad. " Doesn't mean it won't bother him but hopefully realize it's not him. Not the same thing, but I grew up with a critical mom and had to learn that it was expected from her, it was *her* thing, and not to pay attention; told my sons the same thing when we had to move in with her, that's just grandma, ignore it, she'll always say something critical, even with a compliment! Do keep us updated! > > > > Thanks , I am so tired of thinking about this, it's a break to hear your thoughts!! It sounds like my son is going to be released about the same place where your son was. Hey, your son survived, so maybe mine will too. > > > > House having triggers is an issue, but he came home yesterday for first time and he was in same room with Dad for 1/2 hour, and was able to sit and keep working on laptop. He played video games on laptop the whole time to distract himself. However he would not sit in any chair except his chair and says he will not sleep in his bed or bedroom since we moved it across the hall (we did this with his knowledge and the consent of SW). > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 7, 2012 Report Share Posted May 7, 2012 Home, wow, keep us updated. I hope he brings home with him his successes to grow on! Also hope he can manage less anxiety around dad and dad's BPD, realize that that is DAD'S disorder/problem to work on and maybe learn to ignore/shrug it off as " just dad. " Doesn't mean it won't bother him but hopefully realize it's not him. Not the same thing, but I grew up with a critical mom and had to learn that it was expected from her, it was *her* thing, and not to pay attention; told my sons the same thing when we had to move in with her, that's just grandma, ignore it, she'll always say something critical, even with a compliment! Do keep us updated! > > > > Thanks , I am so tired of thinking about this, it's a break to hear your thoughts!! It sounds like my son is going to be released about the same place where your son was. Hey, your son survived, so maybe mine will too. > > > > House having triggers is an issue, but he came home yesterday for first time and he was in same room with Dad for 1/2 hour, and was able to sit and keep working on laptop. He played video games on laptop the whole time to distract himself. However he would not sit in any chair except his chair and says he will not sleep in his bed or bedroom since we moved it across the hall (we did this with his knowledge and the consent of SW). > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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