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Here is what I have come up with to start out with ERP for my son. I'd

appreciate any potential problems you see, etc. (And yes we tried to do ERP

already with a therapist! Son completely fooled him about how he was

experiencing exposures.)

Focus is on overcoming fear of Dad and thus Dad's " dirt. "

Step 4 on Hierarchy: Hearing Dad's voice

Taped Voice

Book - chemistry

Read emails

Narrate trip to Goshen

Read angry speech

Read what Dad wrote:

I read Dad's blog

Son read Dad's blog

Visual:

Put up pictures of Dad in kitchen, study

Put up pictures of Dad in living room, bedroom

Put up pictures of Dad in bathroom

Show movie of Dad talking in study

Show movie of Dad talking in car

Show movie of Dad talking at work

Hear Dad's voice:

Repeat taped voice sequence except live on speaker phone

Repeat taped sequence except live in next room

Thanks so much!

Rhonda

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Hello Rhonda,

I think you have some great ideas here. My only thoughts is to maybe start out

with the ones where your son finds it harder to cheat and not pay attention.

For example, having your son read out loud is one where he has to engage and pay

attention, whereas with those where he only has to observe or passively listen

he might be more tempted to ignore or play mind games in order not to feel the

pain of the ERP. I found that with my son I had to actively observe him to be

sure he wasn't finding ways not to really engage with the ERP - for example,

whenever he had to look at pictures that bothered him, I watched where his eyes

were and reminded him when I noticed that he was no longer focusing on the

picture. I also noticed that when he got more used to doing ERP and saw that it

was helping him, I didn't have to remind him as much.

Another thought: I'm wonder if it might be better to hold off putting up

pictures of Dad around the house until the ERP is up and going. With my son, I

could see where pictures might have made him angry, especially in the beginning

and in situations where he wasn't asked to focus on the pictures but where the

pictures where in his sight. In this case, the pictures might only add to the

anxiety without actively contributing to ERP. But, I do see how pictures, like

the one you plan to use, could be helpful sometime - I'm just not sure when.

Hope this helps.

Best,

Joni

>

> Here is what I have come up with to start out with ERP for my son. I'd

appreciate any potential problems you see, etc. (And yes we tried to do ERP

already with a therapist! Son completely fooled him about how he was

experiencing exposures.)

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Hi Joni -

Thanks for thinking about this! That's so helpful to see how what seems like

" passive exposure " could actually contribute to anxiety level because it's not a

direct face-to-face thing. I tend to like " passive exposure " because it's easier

for me! But won't be easier in the long run, right?? I think using the pictures

to look at specifically rather than just putting up would change it to active

and direct.

Rhonda

Re: my ERP plan

Hello Rhonda,

I think you have some great ideas here. My only thoughts is to maybe start out

with the ones where your son finds it harder to cheat and not pay attention. For

example, having your son read out loud is one where he has to engage and pay

attention, whereas with those where he only has to observe or passively listen

he might be more tempted to ignore or play mind games in order not to feel the

pain of the ERP. I found that with my son I had to actively observe him to be

sure he wasn't finding ways not to really engage with the ERP - for example,

whenever he had to look at pictures that bothered him, I watched where his eyes

were and reminded him when I noticed that he was no longer focusing on the

picture. I also noticed that when he got more used to doing ERP and saw that it

was helping him, I didn't have to remind him as much.

Another thought: I'm wonder if it might be better to hold off putting up

pictures of Dad around the house until the ERP is up and going. With my son, I

could see where pictures might have made him angry, especially in the beginning

and in situations where he wasn't asked to focus on the pictures but where the

pictures where in his sight. In this case, the pictures might only add to the

anxiety without actively contributing to ERP. But, I do see how pictures, like

the one you plan to use, could be helpful sometime - I'm just not sure when.

Hope this helps.

Best,

Joni

>

> Here is what I have come up with to start out with ERP for my son. I'd

appreciate any potential problems you see, etc. (And yes we tried to do ERP

already with a therapist! Son completely fooled him about how he was

experiencing exposures.)

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Sounds good. Can't recall what age your son is. But assume you will go over

this plan with him and the two of you choose which item or 2 to start with? My

son was in middle school when OCD began and wasn't helpful in choosing anything.

But I'd name a few things, pick what I felt and asked if he agreed, worked that

way.

Will he be in the same room with dad right now? If not, standing near the

room/doorway that dad is in could be one.

>

> Here is what I have come up with to start out with ERP for my son. I'd

appreciate any potential problems you see, etc. (And yes we tried to do ERP

already with a therapist! Son completely fooled him about how he was

experiencing exposures.)

>

> Focus is on overcoming fear of Dad and thus Dad's " dirt. "

>

> Step 4 on Hierarchy: Hearing Dad's voice

>

> Taped Voice

>

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Thanks I like those ideas. I hadn't thought of him standing near room dad

is in. He won't be in same room right now. Hopefully soon. :)

Rhonda

Re: my ERP plan

Sounds good. Can't recall what age your son is. But assume you will go over

this plan with him and the two of you choose which item or 2 to start with? My

son was in middle school when OCD began and wasn't helpful in choosing anything.

But I'd name a few things, pick what I felt and asked if he agreed, worked that

way.

Will he be in the same room with dad right now? If not, standing near the

room/doorway that dad is in could be one.

>

> Here is what I have come up with to start out with ERP for my son. I'd

appreciate any potential problems you see, etc. (And yes we tried to do ERP

already with a therapist! Son completely fooled him about how he was

experiencing exposures.)

>

> Focus is on overcoming fear of Dad and thus Dad's " dirt. "

>

> Step 4 on Hierarchy: Hearing Dad's voice

>

> Taped Voice

>

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