pool party

[Guest guest]

Pearl... I guess I have to step in here to respond about your comment that you

didn't feel invited to the pool party last year. Because of the tenor of your

letter, I have spent the early hours of this morning reviewing the archives to

dissect why anyone would have felt left out.

Last year there were two Yahoo announcements about the pool party. (I know

there was a letter in the file section (available to all group members) with

specific information on the pool party.) On July 21, 2005, Jo posted a specific

note about the party to someone new in the group:

" You may notice some talk of a Pool Party at Marta's. Just to let you

know...everyone is invited. You can swim (or not). Some folks bring a dish.

Marta is cooking Oven deep pit. We the guest suppy the rest. It's great fun, a

great time to meet the weirdo's who like to get their insides rearrainged

(giggle). When you sign on to the group via yahoo the photo of the pool is

Marta's. We have some folks who are traveling from out of state to attend the

party. So set aside August 7th and try to come. The " time " is usually left real

loose. If you show up early Marta just puts you to work. We'll pin Marta down on

an approx. time when it gets closer. " Hugs Jo "

There were between 20 and 30 posts about the " pool party " -- in which people

from all over the country ( & Australia) talked about coming to it, with Marta

responding to each about accommodations, food, extra swim suits she keeps in her

home, etc.

If you weren't able or not feeling like you wanted to attend the pool party this

year (or last)... I think it's fine. If only 6 people showed up this year, that

means that you were amongst well over 200 of us who also couldn't or didn't

choose to make it. But, I, for one... found your letter a bit petulant toward

Marta -- and her generosity over the years to this group with her open-armed

policy toward this group.

In fact, I'm not sure how many other people have opened their home to someone

else within this group! (Laf, little lone all of us at once!)

Marta... thank you for your love and generosity to this group.

Elle Rowley

Co-founder of the " Friends " group with Marta.

Re: calendar funnies

Marta, I just got a reminder of our July meeting also. Deleted and wondered

what the heck was going on.

My new living room looks soooo pretty. I missed the party, and I am sooo

sorry so few came out. I was sure you were going to have so many there. I had

to

take the delivery time when I could get it. Between my daughters school, my

therapy and when I could get her taken care of for me, and then add in when I

could get my furniture delivered, it just didn't work out. I am truly sorry

and I am sure no one intended to hurt your feelings about it. Just seems lives

get so complicated these days. I know mine does. I am sure those that showed

up had a wonderful time and really had some real bonding. Again, I am sorry.

Last year I didn't feel like I was invited. I thought it was only for a

select few. I now know you never meant it that way, and I missed a good time.

Of

course I wasn't that far out then either.

Pearl

[Guest guest]

Elle, thanks for your response. I have been getting some pressure

from my DH regarding my habit of inviting people he considers total

strangers (but who I don't!) to stay in my home. When I told him I

wasn't going to have any more pool parties due to lack of interest,

he said, " Good! " .

I assumed that the reason Pearl didn't come was because Jo was not

going to be here this year. Of course, I am not a mind-reader and

could have been wrong, but I am accustomed to analyzing people in my

work so it extends to my personal life.

I do want to stress that my home is still open to my friends from

this group. I do want to be contacted when you are in town and we

can still gather here. It just will no longer be an open house type

of thing. My time is too valuable to spend the effort to prepare

for guests who do not show up.

I do understand that people have moved on with their lives as they

should and hanging out with us is no longer a priority for many. I

don't have a problem with that. My friends from this group are very

real to me, they are the ones I speak to on a regular basis and see

in person whenever the opportunity presents itself.

Thanks again, Friend, Marta

********************************

> Marta -- and her generosity over the years to this group with her

open-armed policy toward this group.

>

> In fact, I'm not sure how many other people have opened their home

to someone else within this group! (Laf, little lone all of us at

once!)

>

> Marta... thank you for your love and generosity to this group.

>

> Elle Rowley

> Co-founder of the " Friends " group with Marta.

[Guest guest]

I did not mean anything against Marta. I wasn't on this group early enough

obviously to have read the part that you quoted. I never saw it. So I did not

feel the invite.. That was just my personal feeling. I was new to the group

and I never meant any thing against Marta at all. In fact if you noticed I

mentioned I was sorry that I was unable to come. I truly had planned on coming.

I

have felt, and have said so in the past that I have not always felt as much

a part of the group as I would have liked. I am sure that is much my fault as

others. I have tried to share ideas and thoughts and they have not been well

taken. I have tried to resign from the group and Jo talked me out of that.

So I am between a rock and a hard place. If it would make it more comfortable

for everyone else, you may remove me from the list. I never say things the

right way, or whatever. So just remove me.

Pearl