Re: Re: problems with humping

November 16, 2008

Sexual hyerstimulation is also very common with gifted individuals.

Kristy

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Re: problems with " humping "

- thank you so much for your honesty and insight. My son has many words

but is

essentially non-verbal and it is always a guessing game to try and figure out

how he is

feeling. I have often thought that things were chaotic on the inside for him

but he didn't

know how to express that or even that he figured that everyone felt like he does

because

he knows nothing else. (if that makes any sense!) I'm so sorry you have

those memories

- childhood and home is supposed to be where you feel safe and loved! I hope

that you

can now get to the bottom of your medical issues and find some peace in your

life!

Thanks again, G

>

> Hello-

>

> I saw this topic and I just had to comment. Since it is a fairly

> taboo subject I am glad to see others bring it up.

>

> Looking back over the years I've had varying degrees of what I'm

> positive is the 'Neuroimmune' dysfunction throughout my life.

>

> I am 26 now (male) and I can actually relate with some of the things

> you are discussing here on the board.

>

> While I can't speak directly for your children and say this is 'also'

> the case with them I can explain from my own point of view that I hope

> might shed some 'potential' light on this subject.

>

> I've struggled throughout my entire life with what I now realize is

> likely the Neuroimmune dysfunction. I was diagnosed via NeuroSPECT

> scan at age 24, however; I can remember vividly having difficulty all

> the way back to four years old.

>

> I hadn't begun kindergarten yet, but I remember being preoccupied with

> sexual stimuli. However- contrary to what was believed by my mother

> at the time- it didn't really 'occur' out of a 'sexual urge' as much

> as I found it eased the pain I frequently found myself in. It was

> calming. It seemed to be a temporary band-aid to the incredible pain

> and unknown 'internal unease' I was feeling. I would complain a lot,

> cry about things, have stomach aches very frequently, and was just

> generally in a lot of emotional, psychological, and physical pain.

> Someone caught me stimulating myself who then told my mother and

> father about it. I wasn't even five years old yet, but my mother

> became very angry about it. I remember she was even so disgusted by

> it she wouldn't even talk to me for what seemed like quite a while. I

> remember her telling me that it was 'yucky,' that I DO NOT do that,

> that 'Heavenly Father' does NOT like that, and she essentially

> wouldn't even talk to me for a while after it. I remember being VERY

> UPSET, and tried to follow her to get reassurance that she wasn't

> going to leave me or something- I tried pulling on her arm, and tried

> to get her to 'acknowledge' me... she just abruptly pulled away

> angrily with a great disgust telling me to 'STOP'. I remember crying

> over it. I TRULY

> and honestly was thinking my Mother and Father didn't love me

> anymore. She also did it in front of my four other siblings who then

> teased me relentlessly about it for well over a decade after. I was

> considered 'gross' by a lot of people in the family. (I come from an

> extremely religious background.)

>

> For me this was a TRULY life changing event for me.

>

> So I FIRST want to applaud all of you for handling this delicately-

> first and foremost. 'I' personally have appreciation for you all not

> over-reacting with this because I can ASSURE you- over-reacting can

> cause MUCH, MUCH more damage than any act they are performing.

>

> While I can't speak for any of your children directly I DO KNOW that

> for me it was done because I was in this 'vague' unrelenting pain and

> discomfort on all levels. I noticed some times and days were worse

> than others. I often felt like my 'insides' or central nervous system

> was INCREDIBLY over activated. If any of you have ever touched a 9 volt

> battery to your tongue you know what that 'tingle' and shock feels

> like. Well- the ongoing feeling felt like I had 'that' type of

> feeling throughout the base of my brain, spine and nerves most of the

> time. It was INCREDIBLY painful and uncomfortable. My parents were

> troubled because I would cry a lot, have tantrums, not do well in

> school, had a lot of trouble learning- and just generally HATED

> school. I would bawl my eyes out not to have to go- simply because I

> was in an enormous amount of pain and discomfort.

>

> The troubling thing for me was this. After being 'caught'

> humping/sexually stimulating myself, I noticed I continued to do it.

> While at that point I now realized (in a young child's mind) that if I

> was caught doing anything of that nature I would essentially lose my

> parents, and I would essentially go to hell and be stuck with the

> internal torment and pain/discomfort I was already experiencing for

> all of eternity. (Dramatic, perhaps but it was VERY real in my mind.)

> However- I want to point out that I did not continue the sexual

> stimulation because I was getting a real 'hedonistic' thrill out of

> it, but rather found it dramatically eased the internal pain I was

> experiencing and seemed to 'quite' down the 'electrical volt-like'

> sensations throughout my central nervous system. I however didn't

> know how to explain that I was in pain (it didn't make sense), I would

> essentially just cry a

> lot, and have angry outbursts. My parents had me start seeing the

> school's psych. counselor in Kindergarten. They never were able to

> 'distinguish' what was wrong with me. On top of that I consistently

> had so much anxiety and such over active nerves I felt like I had to

> urinate all the time. I would complain to my mother, she would take

> me to the restroom and I had nothing to go because my bladder was empty.

>

> I was taken to the doctor and tested for a bladder infection- but that

> came back negative. The doctor just wrote it off by telling my mother

> it was just 'nerves.'

>

> To make a long story short this theme continued throughout my ENTIRE

> life. I believe I've seen well over a dozen counselors, been on 27

> separate medications, had tried nearly every treatment available

> (except E.C.T.). I have even attempted suicide, and been in a

> psych-ward twice. (I was the one that placed myself in the

> psych-ward.) I'm not 'insane' I just didn't have any answers!

>

> I actually read one of Dr. Amen's books talking about SPECT scans so I

> was in pursuit of the scan when I came down with an unknown virus that

> I got incredibly sick from. I had, had periods of severe fatigue in

> the past, but nothing permanent. After the virus in 2002, I've had

> very bad fatigue, and brain fog ever since- on top of the depression

> etc. It just exacerbated all the problems I had previous to its

> onset. I eventually

> got in a position to get the NeuroSPECT scan and that is when they

> came back showing many problems, but specifically a lot of

> hypo-perfusion throughout my entire brain. I never abused drugs- so

> we were able to rule out damage done from 'substance' abuse, which

> essentially left us with a 'Neuroimmunolgical' process taking place-

> that was in 2006.

>

> I look back now and things seem to make much more sense than they ever

> had before. I have known from the time I was a little child that all

> of my sexual stimulating was done as a 'therapeutic' behavior to try

> to address the internal pain/over stimulation I was experiencing- but

> I never could understand why I was in so much pain, while nobody else

> experienced the same thing. For two decades it seemed like the volume

> on all my senses was turned WAY up. Sexual stimulating temporarily

> helped turn the volume down a little bit. (I'm assuming it is because

> of the endorphins (natural pain killers).)

>

> Looking back I have realized that the 'over excitation' I've

> experienced within my central nervous system always seemed to be

> worsened when I was exposed to dust, dirt, allergens, pet dander and

> fur, as well as other things. I've also realized overtime that I am

> EXTREMELY sensitive to even the slightest of fumes from paint,

> cleaning products, varnishes, new carpet, car pollution, etc. When

> these things affect me, I get the similar 'old' feelings of my central

> nervous system being violently over stimulated (just like the 9 volt

> battery to the tongue). When I avoid them it is amazing how calm and

> clear headed I find myself. I am emotionally balanced and I am about

> symptom free.

>

> I do PROFOUNDLY better when I avoid and/or limit my exposure to these

> things. The effect they have on me is so dramatic it requires being

> affected by it personally to fully understand. If a room has been

> recently

> pained (and I don't even know it) it will often times wind up causing

> me to become so exhausted and ill from it I'm laid in bed for days on

> end.

>

> I can't say 'my' experiences are the same as your children's but if

> they are anything like me, I have realized I don't do a lot better if

> I have not removed a lot of the items listed above from my environment

> in addition to doing everything else in the protocol.

>

> I hope some of this is helpful...

>

> Thanks,

>

November 16, 2008

Wow, thank you for sharing that! I think my son is definetly trying to

calm down his central nervous system by stimulating his private area.

Very insightful to hear your feedback...

Sincerely,

L. Juarez, PhD Candidate, M.S., Marriage and Family Therapist

On Sun, Nov 16, 2008 at 8:26 PM, wrote:

I really appreciate that - thank you for the comments.

-

>>

>> Hello-

>> I saw this topic and I just had to comment. Since it is a fairly

>> taboo subject I am glad to see others bring it up.

>> Looking back over the years I've had varying degrees of what I'm

>> positive is the 'Neuroimmune' dysfunction throughout my life.

>> I am 26 now (male) and I can actually relate with some of the things

>> you are discussing here on the board.

>> While I can't speak directly for your children and say this is 'also'

>> the case with them I can explain from my own point of view that I

>> hope might shed some 'potential' light on this subject.

>> I've struggled throughout my entire life with what I now realize is

>> likely the Neuroimmune dysfunction. I was diagnosed via NeuroSPECT

>> scan at age 24, however; I can remember vividly having difficulty all

>> the way back to four years old.

>> I hadn't begun kindergarten yet, but I remember being preoccupied

>> with sexual stimuli. However- contrary to what was believed by my

>> mother at the time- it didn't really 'occur' out of a 'sexual urge'

>> as much as I found it eased the pain I frequently found myself in.

>> It was calming. It seemed to be a temporary band-aid to the

>> incredible pain and unknown 'internal unease' I was feeling. I would

>> complain a lot, cry about things, have stomach aches very frequently,

>> and was just generally in a lot of emotional, psychological, and

>> physical pain. Someone caught me stimulating myself who then told my

>> mother and father about it. I wasn't even five years old yet, but my

>> mother became very angry about it. I remember she was even so

>> disgusted by it she wouldn't even talk to me for what seemed like

>> quite a while. I remember her telling me that it was 'yucky,' that I

>> DO NOT do that, that 'Heavenly Father' does NOT like that, and she

>> essentially wouldn't even talk to me for a while after it. I remember

>> being VERY UPSET, and tried to follow her to get reassurance that she

>> wasn't going to leave me or something- I tried pulling on her arm,

>> and tried to get her to 'acknowledge' me... she just abruptly pulled

>> away angrily with a great disgust telling me to 'STOP'. I remember

>> crying over it. I TRULY and honestly was thinking my Mother and

>> Father didn't love me anymore. She also did it in front of my four

>> other siblings who then teased me relentlessly about it for well over

>> a decade after. I was considered 'gross' by a lot of people in the

>> family. (I come from an extremely religious background.)

>> For me this was a TRULY life changing event for me.

>> So I FIRST want to applaud all of you for handling this delicately-

>> first and foremost. 'I' personally have appreciation for you all not

>> over-reacting with this because I can ASSURE you- over-reacting can

>> cause MUCH, MUCH more damage than any act they are performing.

>> While I can't speak for any of your children directly I DO KNOW that

>> for me it was done because I was in this 'vague' unrelenting pain and

>> discomfort on all levels. I noticed some times and days were worse

>> than others. I often felt like my 'insides' or central nervous

>> system was INCREDIBLY over activated. If any of you have ever

>> touched a

9 volt

>> battery to your tongue you know what that 'tingle' and shock feels

>> like. Well- the ongoing feeling felt like I had 'that' type of

>> feeling throughout the base of my brain, spine and nerves most of the

>> time. It was INCREDIBLY painful and uncomfortable. My parents were

>> troubled because I would cry a lot, have tantrums, not do well in

>> school, had a lot of trouble learning- and just generally HATED

>> school. I would bawl my eyes out not to have to go- simply because I

>> was in an enormous amount of pain and discomfort.

>> The troubling thing for me was this. After being 'caught'

>> humping/sexually stimulating myself, I noticed I continued to do it.

>> While at that point I now realized (in a young child's mind) that if

>> I was caught doing anything of that nature I would essentially lose

>> my parents, and I would essentially go to hell and be stuck with the

>> internal torment and pain/discomfort I was already experiencing for

>> all of eternity. (Dramatic, perhaps but it was VERY real in my

mind.)

>> However- I want to point out that I did not continue the sexual

>> stimulation because I was getting a real 'hedonistic' thrill out of

>> it, but rather found it dramatically eased the internal pain I was

>> experiencing and seemed to 'quite' down the 'electrical volt-like'

>> sensations throughout my central nervous system. I however didn't

>> know how to explain that I was in pain (it didn't make sense), I

>> would essentially just cry a lot, and have angry outbursts. My

>> parents had me start seeing the school's psych. counselor in

>> Kindergarten. They never were able to 'distinguish' what was wrong

>> with me. On top of that I consistently had so much anxiety and such

>> over active nerves I felt like I had to urinate all the time. I

>> would complain to my mother, she would take me to the restroom and I

>> had nothing to go because my bladder was

empty.

>>

>> I was taken to the doctor and tested for a bladder infection- but

>> that came back negative. The doctor just wrote it off by telling my

>> mother it was just 'nerves.'

>> To make a long story short this theme continued throughout my ENTIRE

>> life. I believe I've seen well over a dozen counselors, been on 27

>> separate medications, had tried nearly every treatment available

>> (except E.C.T.). I have even attempted suicide, and been in a

>> psych-ward twice. (I was the one that placed myself in the

>> psych-ward.) I'm not 'insane' I just didn't have any answers!

>> I actually read one of Dr. Amen's books talking about SPECT scans so

>> I was in pursuit of the scan when I came down with an unknown virus

>> that I got incredibly sick from. I had, had periods of severe

>> fatigue in the past, but nothing permanent. After the virus in 2002,

>> I've had very bad fatigue, and brain fog ever since- on top of the

>> depression etc. It just exacerbated all the problems I had previous

>> to its onset. I eventually got in a position to get the NeuroSPECT

>> scan and that is when they came back showing many problems, but

>> specifically a lot of hypo-perfusion throughout my entire brain. I

>> never abused drugs- so we were able to rule out damage done from

>> 'substance' abuse, which essentially left us with a

>> 'Neuroimmunolgical' process taking place- that was in 2006.

>> I look back now and things seem to make much more sense than they

>> ever had before. I have known from the time I was a little child

>> that all of my sexual stimulating was done as a 'therapeutic'

>> behavior to try to address the internal pain/over stimulation I was

>> experiencing- but I never could understand why I was in so much pain,

>> while nobody else experienced the same thing. For two decades it

>> seemed like the volume on all my senses was turned WAY up. Sexual

>> stimulating temporarily helped turn the volume down a little bit.

>> (I'm assuming it is because of the endorphins (natural pain

>> killers).)

>> Looking back I have realized that the 'over excitation' I've

>> experienced within my central nervous system always seemed to be

>> worsened when I was exposed to dust, dirt, allergens, pet dander and

>> fur, as well as other things. I've also realized overtime that I am

>> EXTREMELY sensitive to even the slightest of fumes from paint,

>> cleaning products, varnishes, new carpet, car pollution, etc. When

>> these things affect me, I get the similar 'old' feelings of my

>> central nervous system being violently over stimulated (just like the

>> 9 volt battery to the tongue). When I avoid them it is amazing how

>> calm and clear headed I find myself. I am emotionally balanced and I

>> am about symptom free.

>> I do PROFOUNDLY better when I avoid and/or limit my exposure to these

>> things. The effect they have on me is so dramatic it requires being

>> affected by it personally to fully understand. If a room has been

>> recently pained (and I don't even know it) it will often times wind

>> up causing me to become so exhausted and ill from it I'm laid in bed

>> for days on end.

>>

>> I can't say 'my' experiences are the same as your children's but if

>> they are anything like me, I have realized I don't do a lot better if

>> I have not removed a lot of the items listed above from my

>> environment in addition to doing everything else in the protocol.

>>

>> I hope some of this is helpful...

>>

>> Thanks,

>>

>

<mailto: >

November 16, 2008

Thank you so much for this. It is so helpful to hear what I know my son

is going through also. If I can't get other people to understand what he

is going through at least I can and help him navigate this through his

life as best he can. I'm sooo sorry your family reacted the way they did

to you. Thank you for helping us not to. Jerri