Guest guest Posted February 6, 2009 Report Share Posted February 6, 2009 My son is the same way in his behavior and how I respond to him. Most behavioal treatment with him does not work. Connecting with him with like you speak of works well and actually changes his behavior in the process. Thanks for sharing this portion of your story also. From: Caroline Glover <sfglover@...> Subject: Re: defiant behavior Date: Friday, February 6, 2009, 8:37 AM , We had a period of time like that with one of my sons... I¹m sure he could easily have been diagnosed with ODD. It was horrible. I think that soy was a trigger, certain meds made it worse (I¹m thinking Tenex... we lowered it and then he improved a bit), but mostly it has just taken time on the protocol and after several years (I know you don¹t want to hear that) it has gotten much, MUCH better. He¹s much closer to average in his oppositional behavior now. I¹d say it was pretty intense oppositional behavior for about a solid 3 years but for the last two it has been steadily improving (he¹s been sick about 5 years). One thing that helped me was knowing that he hadn¹t always been like that... before his seizures began at age 3 he was so sweet tempered... practically angelic. Then he was hit with seizures (they thought he was having 4 different types, he was in status epilepticus at one point, lost all speech, I could go on and on... to sum it up the speech therapist told me he presented like a stroke victim... the neurogeneticist thought he had Lennox Gastaut Syndrome... he was a very, VERY sick boy). After he became ill the opposition started. I hoped that it was caused by one of the seizure meds and that it would go away as he was weaned from one to another, but that didn¹t happen. Basically he just had to get healthier... and that took a long time. Back then, another thing that helped me was that once in a while he would show me that he really didn¹t want to be like that... one night when he was being particularly venomous, out of the blue, he burst into tears and said ³I¹m not going to have any friends!². He knew what he was doing but couldn¹t seem to stop himself. Eventually I figured out that the best way to get him out of one of his episodes was to just stop what ever I was doing (this was not easy with 5 children at home...) and just pick him up and love him... hold and rock him and not talk except maybe to tell him that I loved him and was helping him calm down. He responded to that very well... it was as if he was on an emotional overload and he couldn¹t get control of himself. If I showed anger toward him when he was acting cross, it just made him more tense and fueled his anxiety and anger. As his language skills increased and he was better able to express himself verbally, I think that helped. For a long time after he began to regain his speech he was completely echolalic... he couldn¹t produce original phrases. He knew what he wanted to say, and that he used to be able to speak very well, so he was extremely frustrated to be in the position he was in. Some days he would just scream and scream. Now that I think about it, he is on a low dose of Adderall, and I think that has helped calm him some by allowing him to slow down and think about things before reacting. It was a long time before Dr. G was ready to put him on the Adderall, though... he wanted to optimize everything else first before he started that. The behavior was improving before he started Adderall, though, so Adderall was not the cure... it has just helped some. Without going into another long drawn out explanation I can also say that the antiviral played a huge role in his improvement cognitively. I¹ve probably said too much, but please know that the behavior is NOT who your daughter really is... it is a part of her illness and inside she doesn¹t want to be that way. It can get better. Caroline G. From: Hankinson <jlhank80 (DOT) com> Reply-<groups (DOT) com> Date: Fri, 30 Jan 2009 15:29:38 -0800 (PST) <groups (DOT) com> Subject: defiant behavior Hi everyone, I was wondering if anyone here experienced a lot of defiant behavior from their child with ASD. I have a 3.5 year old on Valtrex, Diflucan, Tenex, and Zyrtec. We started Lexapro but she was so hyper and crazy we took her off. She is GF/CF and all her allergens have been removed. She is better in a lot of ways, more interactive and better language and understanding, but she fights me about almost everything! Screaming, falling on the floor, crying and noncompliance are the issues. And it's all day long! Also she says " yes/no/yes/ no " Any help? Thank you, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 I also posted regarding the book 1-2-3 Magic. All of my three boys have " issues " - Asperger's, mild/mod autism and ADHD--and this method has made a huge difference for us as a family. I, too, highly recommend this book. All the best, Robyn > From: Neno/Natasa <neno@...> > Subject: Re: defiant behavior > > Date: Thursday, February 5, 2009, 2:47 PM > We also have a very noncompliant child, it also was the case > the better he > was getting in terms of verbal ability and Œbeing with > it¹, the more > controlling/defiant he became. He is five now, and someone > recommended a > book to us called ³1,2,3 Magic² - it is a discipline book > written for > Œnormal¹ kids, but some of the general principles can be > applied to asd, > depending on individual situation. > > Our son is 5 and we feel some of the methods from the book > have made a huge > difference to his non-compliance issues. Another great > thing about the book > is that it helps you as a parent to apply breaks and > generally not boil over > when frustrated. I really cannot recommend it highly > enough. > > I must say some of the things that are working for us now > I'm not sure would > have worked 1 or 2 years ago, partly because of son¹s age > and partly because > his defiant behaviour was more down to autism and less down > to pure childish > behaviour (need to control you/her environment). > > As I said the book was written with typical kids in mind > but some of the > things could be modified and applied for your situation, > hopefully. Even if > you find you cannot apply any of the methods right now, > save it for the day > when you dd is ready. > > Hth > Natasa > > > > > > > > Hi everyone, I was wondering if anyone here > > experienced a lot of defiant behavior from their child > > with ASD. I have a 3.5 year old on Valtrex, Diflucan, > > Tenex, and Zyrtec. We started Lexapro but she was so > > hyper and crazy we took her off. She is GF/CF and all > > her allergens have been removed. > > > > She is better in a lot of ways, more interactive and > > better language and understanding, but she fights me > > about almost everything! Screaming, falling on the > > floor, crying and noncompliance are the issues. And > > it's all day long! Also she says > " yes/no/yes/no " > > > > Any help? Thank you, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 I'll add on to the praises for that book, too. Definitely helped in our world, too. ________________________________ From: Robyn & Greg Coggins <rngcoggs@...> Sent: Monday, February 9, 2009 3:38:56 PM Subject: Re: defiant behavior I also posted regarding the book 1-2-3 Magic. All of my three boys have " issues " - Asperger's, mild/mod autism and ADHD--and this method has made a huge difference for us as a family. I, too, highly recommend this book. All the best, Robyn > From: Neno/Natasa <nenodalmaholidays (DOT) co.uk> > Subject: Re: defiant behavior > groups (DOT) com > Date: Thursday, February 5, 2009, 2:47 PM > We also have a very noncompliant child, it also was the case > the better he > was getting in terms of verbal ability and ¼being with > it¹, the more > controlling/ defiant he became. He is five now, and someone > recommended a > book to us called ³1,2,3 Magic² - it is a discipline book > written for > ¼normal¹ kids, but some of the general principles can be > applied to asd, > depending on individual situation. > > Our son is 5 and we feel some of the methods from the book > have made a huge > difference to his non-compliance issues. Another great > thing about the book > is that it helps you as a parent to apply breaks and > generally not boil over > when frustrated. I really cannot recommend it highly > enough. > > I must say some of the things that are working for us now > I'm not sure would > have worked 1 or 2 years ago, partly because of son¹s age > and partly because > his defiant behaviour was more down to autism and less down > to pure childish > behaviour (need to control you/her environment) . > > As I said the book was written with typical kids in mind > but some of the > things could be modified and applied for your situation, > hopefully. Even if > you find you cannot apply any of the methods right now, > save it for the day > when you dd is ready. > > Hth > Natasa > > > > > > > > Hi everyone, I was wondering if anyone here > > experienced a lot of defiant behavior from their child > > with ASD. I have a 3.5 year old on Valtrex, Diflucan, > > Tenex, and Zyrtec. We started Lexapro but she was so > > hyper and crazy we took her off. She is GF/CF and all > > her allergens have been removed. > > > > She is better in a lot of ways, more interactive and > > better language and understanding, but she fights me > > about almost everything! Screaming, falling on the > > floor, crying and noncompliance are the issues. And > > it's all day long! Also she says > " yes/no/yes/ no " > > > > Any help? Thank you, > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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