Woohoo Survived another weekend with the family

[Guest guest]

Hi all.

Out of pocket for the last few days and I have a lot to catch up on.

Just wanted to report that I successfully tolerated my brother and

his BS. The key was to vastly lower my expectations. He was as surly

as ever and about as much fun to be around as a wasps nest. He and my

SIL took to yelling at my son and I basically positioned myself

physically between then and my son and explained to him what he was

doing wrong in a calm and controlled voice. With both of them yelling

at him he didn't understand what they were upset about. Once I calmly

explained to him what he had done, he got it and moved on. I pretty

much ignored them and focused on my boy. As it was we had a pretty

good weekend. The nada got surly with us once and I confronted her on

it and the rest of the weekend was smooth.

I am beginning to believe that with SOME BPDs and their NPD

codependents it is a matter of taking control of the situation and

confronting them each and every time they act up. So far it seems to

be working for me. As it was I did not get upset once the entire time

we were at nada's. Small step but I am going to take my victories

where I can get them. Happy Holiday.

Be strong

[Guest guest]

Congrats!!!

.... and, as with any family gathering, there were probably deviled

eggs present... they make great 'bombs'...

Your son saw you do what every child dreams of... STANDING UP FOR

HIM... kudo's to you for doing what our parent(s) never could do for

us as children!!!

Lynnette

>

> Hi all.

> Out of pocket for the last few days and I have a lot to catch up

on.

> Just wanted to report that I successfully tolerated my brother and

> his BS. The key was to vastly lower my expectations. He was as

surly

> as ever and about as much fun to be around as a wasps nest. He and

my

> SIL took to yelling at my son and I basically positioned myself

> physically between then and my son and explained to him what he

was

> doing wrong in a calm and controlled voice. With both of them

yelling

> at him he didn't understand what they were upset about. Once I

calmly

> explained to him what he had done, he got it and moved on. I

pretty

> much ignored them and focused on my boy. As it was we had a pretty

> good weekend. The nada got surly with us once and I confronted her

on

> it and the rest of the weekend was smooth.

> I am beginning to believe that with SOME BPDs and their NPD

> codependents it is a matter of taking control of the situation and

> confronting them each and every time they act up. So far it seems

to

> be working for me. As it was I did not get upset once the entire

time

> we were at nada's. Small step but I am going to take my victories

> where I can get them. Happy Holiday.

> Be strong

>

>