RE: Re: How did everyone survive Fada's Day?

June 16, 2008

I tried to focus my attention on my husband and children yesterday. In the back

of my mind, I thought of my father. (My mom has the BPD and my father is the

active participant in her manipulative behavior). I bought a card for him

(having no contact for over a year) and it sat on my desk for two weeks. I

labored over sending it...in the end, I sent a brief email " Thinking of you.

Happy Father's Day. " It was part of the grieving process I guess...forgiveness.

Although Forgiveness is not forgetting.

Positive thoughts to all.Kara

To: WTOAdultChildren1@...: jdigger21@...: Mon, 16 Jun

2008 11:34:59 +0000Subject: Re: How did everyone survive

Fada's Day?

>> oh, mine was fine, I worked most of the day and they went to my >

sister's cause she wanted to have a dinner, her first 'to do' since > the baby

was born. I don't know if it went well or not.>Well, this has all been a sad and

tragic time for me. My father has bipolar and I assumed was just a very

challenging individual! However, after our latest 'bust up' he recently told me

he has a BPD. Having turned 40 and with the arrival of our first child 4 months

ago, this huge missing piece of the jigsaw made me realise enough was enough. So

I have finally walked away for the time being, I just cannot hack it anymore. I

have since been reading 'Stop walking on eggshells' and for the first time in 40

years I am beginning to understand and make sense of my life.So although I sent

a father's day card which my wife bought for me, I felt entirely numb and as

always very confused emotionally. But I suppose early days and all that.My

overwhelming feeling is that I wish I had known about this condition years

before, and perhaps what a fool I have been not to twig that there was more to

him than just bipolar. All these years could have been more productive and

happier, but better late than never.Hope you other kids of FADAs had a bearable

day.

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