Re: confronting dad - sorry so long

[Guest guest]

Tina,

I'm sorry you've had to endure this - -first your nada's abuse and now the

realization that your

father wasn't there for you either. It's hard to take - - but he could have

protected you and didn't. He got himself out of the misery, but didn't care

enough to even reassure you that she was at fault and not you -- and showed no

empathy when you turned to him.

He's sick, too, just in a different way -- he was passively abusive -- he could

have helped and didn't. He could help now - - but hasn't. I guess you're just

seeing more clearly why you have PTSD -- it's very traumatic for a child not to

feel loved and protected.

You'll need to grieve the relationship with him that you never had -- then

you'll be able to let go of him emotionally. You may still be in relationship

with him, but it will based on reality -- the reality that he just wasn't there

for you. I'm reading " Safe People " by Henry Cloud (he also wrote 'Boundaries',

which I have not read) He discusses all the ways we've been devealued in

relationships and how we pull back and quit trusting relationships. This is

harmful to us -- as we've designed to be in relationship with each other. Thank

God we've got this board!~

Blessings,

AZClown

confronting dad - sorry so long

Oh where to start. I havent posted for some time as I been distracitng

my self with little projects and work, etc. Nada is long gone, left Dad

about 15 years ago. However bad memories remain that i cant get away

from. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD - (caused by nadas abuse)and

some months ago did try to broach the subject with Dad about the child

abuse and how relatives had trivialized and denied the incidents. Only

to be met with more rejection and the " your mother " blah blah, and

criticized for complaining yet again for how much I suffered.

So I swallowed my feelings again like so many times before because they

never mattered anyhow. Just gratefull that a least i confonted him. Got

on with my life and maintained kind of a relationship with Dad

everything smooth. Then a couple weeks ago there was an incident at

work with this woman who is BPD type. It brought back alot of bad

feelings about my own nada. Well had enough. Complex PTSD is a whole

other subject for another thread. But I took it upon myself to confront

original source of distress directly.

So I sent my dad an email about the horrific things nada did to me and

how he did nothing to get me away from it. I also put in some shots at

how relatives would not take the abuse seriously. Specfically a time

when nada broke my wrist, I went to his Aunt in tears about this. Then

I caught this same Aunt laughing with my Dad about it over a year

later. That hurt bad and i let him know it.

It's been over a week now and he has not responded. I love my dad and

we had a wonderfull relationship but he would just not see what was

going on before his very eyes. It hurts.

Thanks for listening, Tina

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

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[Guest guest]

Tina,

I am really sorry that you are going through this! I struggle with the abuse by

ommission

myself.

Did Nada also abuse your father, maybe it is stressful for him to deal with it

directly? I

have often been angry at my father for all the stuff he didn't stop Nada from

doing to me

and my brother, He has been dead for 20 years so I can't call him out on it, but

I often

suspect he would not respond.

I hope you can resolve this issue, is it possible to go to therapy with him, so

that you can

get it all out on the table?

Good Luck

L

>

>

> Oh where to start. I havent posted for some time as I been distracitng

> my self with little projects and work, etc. Nada is long gone, left Dad

> about 15 years ago. However bad memories remain that i cant get away

> from. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD - (caused by nadas abuse)and

> some months ago did try to broach the subject with Dad about the child

> abuse and how relatives had trivialized and denied the incidents. Only

> to be met with more rejection and the " your mother " blah blah, and

> criticized for complaining yet again for how much I suffered.

>

> So I swallowed my feelings again like so many times before because they

> never mattered anyhow. Just gratefull that a least i confonted him. Got

> on with my life and maintained kind of a relationship with Dad

> everything smooth. Then a couple weeks ago there was an incident at

> work with this woman who is BPD type. It brought back alot of bad

> feelings about my own nada. Well had enough. Complex PTSD is a whole

> other subject for another thread. But I took it upon myself to confront

> original source of distress directly.

>

> So I sent my dad an email about the horrific things nada did to me and

> how he did nothing to get me away from it. I also put in some shots at

> how relatives would not take the abuse seriously. Specfically a time

> when nada broke my wrist, I went to his Aunt in tears about this. Then

> I caught this same Aunt laughing with my Dad about it over a year

> later. That hurt bad and i let him know it.

>

> It's been over a week now and he has not responded. I love my dad and

> we had a wonderfull relationship but he would just not see what was

> going on before his very eyes. It hurts.

>

> Thanks for listening, Tina

>

[Guest guest]

Hey Tina,

My heart goes out to you. There is nothing worse than a child

coming to a primary attachment figure for comfort and care only to be

laughed at/rejected/essentially abandoned in their moment of need. It

creates such an awful feeling... one that I too am trying to process

all these years, this is coming up as PTSD like symptoms.

I just want you to know that you didn't deserve that kind of treatment.

My father was also violent towards me, and a few months ago I told him

that he couldn't do that to me anymore. It felt so good to finally

stand up to him.

At the same time, there was this part of me that knew he wasn't taking

responsibility for what he did. He would always say, " I've mellowed

out with age. " " Now, I count to ten when I'm angry. " Or my personal

favorite, " It's not an issue for me anymore since I started my blood

pressure medication. "

All of these responses fail to capture what he did to me or take

responsibility for it.

So like you, say. It's double rejection.

At that point I really began separating from my family. My boundary

was, " If you want to see me, you'll have to go to a therapy session

with me. "

That's a great way to make people with personality disorders not want

to see you! At the same time, I knew if I kept involving myself with

people like this, I was just going to kill myself because I was having

symptoms of depression (and they did little to support me to get

care. When I told my father I wasn't well, he told me to go do some

jumping jacks. I just wasn't exercising enough. Wow.)

I know you are hoping your fada might write back and tell you

everything you ever wanted to hear, but I just want to let you know

that with therapy and outside support there is a way to grieve what

your father and family did to you and move forward. There is a way to

find all that love and care that little kid inside of you is still

looking for.

I'd love to hear more about your PTSD struggles and how you have dealt

with them.

Currently grieving and separating from my own fada,

G.

>

>

> Oh where to start. I havent posted for some time as I been distracitng

> my self with little projects and work, etc. Nada is long gone, left Dad

> about 15 years ago. However bad memories remain that i cant get away

> from. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD - (caused by nadas abuse)and

> some months ago did try to broach the subject with Dad about the child

> abuse and how relatives had trivialized and denied the incidents. Only

> to be met with more rejection and the " your mother " blah blah, and

> criticized for complaining yet again for how much I suffered.

>

> So I swallowed my feelings again like so many times before because they

> never mattered anyhow. Just gratefull that a least i confonted him. Got

> on with my life and maintained kind of a relationship with Dad

> everything smooth. Then a couple weeks ago there was an incident at

> work with this woman who is BPD type. It brought back alot of bad

> feelings about my own nada. Well had enough. Complex PTSD is a whole

> other subject for another thread. But I took it upon myself to confront

> original source of distress directly.

>

> So I sent my dad an email about the horrific things nada did to me and

> how he did nothing to get me away from it. I also put in some shots at

> how relatives would not take the abuse seriously. Specfically a time

> when nada broke my wrist, I went to his Aunt in tears about this. Then

> I caught this same Aunt laughing with my Dad about it over a year

> later. That hurt bad and i let him know it.

>

> It's been over a week now and he has not responded. I love my dad and

> we had a wonderfull relationship but he would just not see what was

> going on before his very eyes. It hurts.

>

> Thanks for listening, Tina

>

[Guest guest]

well actually fada was dead set on hanging onto the nada till the day

she died to hang ontot he money he was saving for us KO's and that we

had better apreciate him doing it for us by tolerating all of the

abuse. I told him i couldnt bend over backwards any more he responded

well do it anyways. Think what an accoplishment it would be if you

could tolerate all that behavior. she cant help it " That was his

version of sympathy. Long story she left him and took a subsantial

amount of family savings. He manages to slip in how i didnt tolerate

it enough or could not learn to get along wiht " your mother " at every

oportuntiy. Regardless of my state of mind or how i feel. Like its my

choice how i *should* feel not something that happens naturally. I

have had enough of it. I made up my mind he was just as much a part

of the abuse as nada was.

Thanks for listening, i fell a bit more like a whole person.

Tina

>

> Tina,

> I'm sorry you've had to endure this - -first your nada's abuse and

now the realization that your

> father wasn't there for you either. It's hard to take - - but he

could have protected you and didn't. He got himself out of the

misery, but didn't care enough to even reassure you that she was at

fault and not you -- and showed no empathy when you turned to him.

>

> He's sick, too, just in a different way -- he was passively

abusive -- he could have helped and didn't. He could help now - -

but hasn't. I guess you're just seeing more clearly why you have

PTSD -- it's very traumatic for a child not to feel loved and

protected.

>

> You'll need to grieve the relationship with him that you never had -

- then you'll be able to let go of him emotionally. You may still be

in relationship with him, but it will based on reality -- the reality

that he just wasn't there for you. I'm reading " Safe People " by

Henry Cloud (he also wrote 'Boundaries', which I have not read) He

discusses all the ways we've been devealued in relationships and how

we pull back and quit trusting relationships. This is harmful to us -

- as we've designed to be in relationship with each other. Thank God

we've got this board!~

> Blessings,

> AZClown

>

>

> confronting dad - sorry so long

>

>

> Oh where to start. I havent posted for some time as I been

distracitng

> my self with little projects and work, etc. Nada is long gone, left

Dad

> about 15 years ago. However bad memories remain that i cant get

away

> from. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD - (caused by nadas abuse)

and

> some months ago did try to broach the subject with Dad about the

child

> abuse and how relatives had trivialized and denied the incidents.

Only

> to be met with more rejection and the " your mother " blah blah, and

> criticized for complaining yet again for how much I suffered.

>

> So I swallowed my feelings again like so many times before because

they

> never mattered anyhow. Just gratefull that a least i confonted him.

Got

> on with my life and maintained kind of a relationship with Dad

> everything smooth. Then a couple weeks ago there was an incident at

> work with this woman who is BPD type. It brought back alot of bad

> feelings about my own nada. Well had enough. Complex PTSD is a

whole

> other subject for another thread. But I took it upon myself to

confront

> original source of distress directly.

>

> So I sent my dad an email about the horrific things nada did to me

and

> how he did nothing to get me away from it. I also put in some shots

at

> how relatives would not take the abuse seriously. Specfically a

time

> when nada broke my wrist, I went to his Aunt in tears about this.

Then

> I caught this same Aunt laughing with my Dad about it over a year

> later. That hurt bad and i let him know it.

>

> It's been over a week now and he has not responded. I love my dad

and

> we had a wonderfull relationship but he would just not see what was

> going on before his very eyes. It hurts.

>

> Thanks for listening, Tina

>

>

>

>

>

>

______________________________________________________________________

______________

> Looking for last minute shopping deals?

> Find them fast with Yahoo! Search.

http://tools.search.yahoo.com/newsearch/category.php?category=shopping

>

>

[Guest guest]

I used to think it was getting to him too stressing him out so he

couldnt see right from wrong. But its been 15 years and i thought he

would at least empathize with the C-PTSD cropping up. All he did was

trivialize it and refer to her as " your mother " pointing out my

thinking was wrong. I have come about close as i ever will to

resolving by confronting him. If i ever do contact or have any kind

of association it will be the same as he's done me all these years

emotionally unavailable. At this point I dont care if i ever see him

again.

Therapy thats a joke he thinks there is nothing wrong with him.

Thanks for being there,

Tina

> >

> >

> > Oh where to start. I havent posted for some time as I been

distracitng

> > my self with little projects and work, etc. Nada is long gone,

left Dad

> > about 15 years ago. However bad memories remain that i cant get

away

> > from. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD - (caused by nadas abuse)

and

> > some months ago did try to broach the subject with Dad about the

child

> > abuse and how relatives had trivialized and denied the incidents.

Only

> > to be met with more rejection and the " your mother " blah blah,

and

> > criticized for complaining yet again for how much I suffered.

> >

> > So I swallowed my feelings again like so many times before

because they

> > never mattered anyhow. Just gratefull that a least i confonted

him. Got

> > on with my life and maintained kind of a relationship with Dad

> > everything smooth. Then a couple weeks ago there was an incident

at

> > work with this woman who is BPD type. It brought back alot of bad

> > feelings about my own nada. Well had enough. Complex PTSD is a

whole

> > other subject for another thread. But I took it upon myself to

confront

> > original source of distress directly.

> >

> > So I sent my dad an email about the horrific things nada did to

me and

> > how he did nothing to get me away from it. I also put in some

shots at

> > how relatives would not take the abuse seriously. Specfically a

time

> > when nada broke my wrist, I went to his Aunt in tears about this.

Then

> > I caught this same Aunt laughing with my Dad about it over a year

> > later. That hurt bad and i let him know it.

> >

> > It's been over a week now and he has not responded. I love my dad

and

> > we had a wonderfull relationship but he would just not see what

was

> > going on before his very eyes. It hurts.

> >

> > Thanks for listening, Tina

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Thank yo uso much for you kind resopnses.

IT hurts most i guess to realize all these years i fooled myself into

believing he actually cared and that he was a good father. But now I

realize he cant see what is being done to his own children. He was

really all i ever had so i thought it was good enough. maybe the

denial got me through all those years. But now i cant stand to look

at him, for what the did, or didnt do.

Dad was never violent but could be soemwhat verbally abusive whn

drinking. i am also begining to realize he had and still has a

serious drinking problem. It just that it paled in comparasion to

nadas rants and rages, anything was better than that. Even an

alcoholic emotionally unavailable father. I think this is what

attracted Nada so much he was emotionally unavailable and

unresponsive to her outbursts and let her run the whole show AND

encouraged others to tolerate it AND would pretend the whole time

things were gona be A-OK. He said alot of the similar statements your

fada did, kind of trivialize it or change the subject, etc. That

really sucks dont it.

PTSD its actually " ComplexPTSD " a new diagnoses on the market. It

afflicts genrally long term trauma victims. POW's, Holocaust, captive

situations, repetitive " rescue " scenes, and ..... those who were

repetitively abused as children by thier caretakers.

I wish to stress it is not so much the actual trauma as it is the

victims experience of the trauma. IE: lack of support systems,

inability to escape, etc..

I even said this to fada and pointed out how others trivializing the

trauma made it worse. He just shrugged it off and said " you shouldnt

fault others becasue they are unfamiliar with pshychological terms. "

(Grrrr) I rest my case.

Tina

> >

> >

> > Oh where to start. I havent posted for some time as I been

distracitng

> > my self with little projects and work, etc. Nada is long gone,

left Dad

> > about 15 years ago. However bad memories remain that i cant get

away

> > from. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD - (caused by nadas abuse)

and

> > some months ago did try to broach the subject with Dad about the

child

> > abuse and how relatives had trivialized and denied the incidents.

Only

> > to be met with more rejection and the " your mother " blah blah,

and

> > criticized for complaining yet again for how much I suffered.

> >

> > So I swallowed my feelings again like so many times before

because they

> > never mattered anyhow. Just gratefull that a least i confonted

him. Got

> > on with my life and maintained kind of a relationship with Dad

> > everything smooth. Then a couple weeks ago there was an incident

at

> > work with this woman who is BPD type. It brought back alot of bad

> > feelings about my own nada. Well had enough. Complex PTSD is a

whole

> > other subject for another thread. But I took it upon myself to

confront

> > original source of distress directly.

> >

> > So I sent my dad an email about the horrific things nada did to

me and

> > how he did nothing to get me away from it. I also put in some

shots at

> > how relatives would not take the abuse seriously. Specfically a

time

> > when nada broke my wrist, I went to his Aunt in tears about this.

Then

> > I caught this same Aunt laughing with my Dad about it over a year

> > later. That hurt bad and i let him know it.

> >

> > It's been over a week now and he has not responded. I love my dad

and

> > we had a wonderfull relationship but he would just not see what

was

> > going on before his very eyes. It hurts.

> >

> > Thanks for listening, Tina

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Tina,

It makes me so sad to hear your story. It breaks my heart, but at the

same time makes me feel less alone. My Nada abused (Physically...

excluding the myriad of mental abuse mechanisms) myself and my

siblings by periodically starving us and then (if we complained)

forcing us to eat sticks of butter and throwing dishes at us until we

did. My Fada did nothing at the time and he has even gotten worse

recently, justifying her behavior!

Could you let me know about what C-PTSD entails? I have been out of

the house for 5 years (but still deal Nada/Fada regularly) and have a

lot of anxiety troubles. Specifically I am so unnerved by their

behavior that I have digestive troubles and am having a lot of

difficulty keeping food down (or if I do it seems to fly through me in

about half an hour). When I go see them my breathing gets tight and I

find myself gasping for air.

This discussion board had been helping me immensely. Thank you so much

for your post!

>

>

> Oh where to start. I havent posted for some time as I been distracitng

> my self with little projects and work, etc. Nada is long gone, left Dad

> about 15 years ago. However bad memories remain that i cant get away

> from. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD - (caused by nadas abuse)and

> some months ago did try to broach the subject with Dad about the child

> abuse and how relatives had trivialized and denied the incidents. Only

> to be met with more rejection and the " your mother " blah blah, and

> criticized for complaining yet again for how much I suffered.

>

> So I swallowed my feelings again like so many times before because they

> never mattered anyhow. Just gratefull that a least i confonted him. Got

> on with my life and maintained kind of a relationship with Dad

> everything smooth. Then a couple weeks ago there was an incident at

> work with this woman who is BPD type. It brought back alot of bad

> feelings about my own nada. Well had enough. Complex PTSD is a whole

> other subject for another thread. But I took it upon myself to confront

> original source of distress directly.

>

> So I sent my dad an email about the horrific things nada did to me and

> how he did nothing to get me away from it. I also put in some shots at

> how relatives would not take the abuse seriously. Specfically a time

> when nada broke my wrist, I went to his Aunt in tears about this. Then

> I caught this same Aunt laughing with my Dad about it over a year

> later. That hurt bad and i let him know it.

>

> It's been over a week now and he has not responded. I love my dad and

> we had a wonderfull relationship but he would just not see what was

> going on before his very eyes. It hurts.

>

> Thanks for listening, Tina

>

[Guest guest]

sojaco,

This sounds like similar anxiety I have around Nada. I just want to tell you

two things I do

that really help

1. I don't go anywhere near her without some lavender lotion, I put it all

over my body

and put a dab under my nose so I can sniff it.

2. The second thing I do is square belly breathing. You breath in for 4, Hold

for 4, Exhale

for 4, Hold for 4 and start over again. I feel like I have taken a xanax when

I do this for

10 -20 minutes.

The great thing is no one has to know you are doing these things, and it helps

to keep me

even keeled, and steady breathing!

.. When I go see them my breathing gets tight and I

> find myself gasping for air.

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Tina,

I'm so sorry you are going through this. My father is essentially

the same. He is a complete doormat. The most common phrase used in

our house when stepnada flew into a rage was " just apologize " . Even

if he knew she was in the wrong. If we kept refusing, he'd launch

into the whole " she can't help it, she had a bad childhood " mode,

or " she never got to have children " (which was her choice). When

she really f'd me over right before my wedding, I met him at the

park and let him have it. I brought up every shitty thing she had

said and done to us, and said about my mother. He said nothing.

It's like it didn't even matter. I sobbed my heart out for three

hours. I told him if something like what she had just done to me

ever happened again, he knew which " mother " I would choose. She's

been trying to force us to call her mom and tell others that she is

our mom. If we dare to introduce her as stepmom, she freaks and has

a crying and/or raging fit with us.

Last May, she has pulled her typical BS on my sister and stomped out

of my sister's house. Neither one of them has called her since.

Not for her birthday, not for Christmas, not for Mother's day, not

for their grandchild's birthday. When I speak to either of them,

they don't bring her up. She is basically dead to them. Over

nothing. My father allowed us to be put through the rotten

childhood with her. He allowed her to abuse us, he did nothing to

stop it. He does nothing to go against her EVER. She wants to drag

him 2000 miles away because " there's nothing left for her here. "

And guess what? He's going.

I don't doubt that he loves me and my sister, but he is way more

screwed up than we are to put up with that psycho, and even choose

her over his own children. How sad for him. How sad for your dad

that he is doing the same to you.

::hugs::

>

>

> Oh where to start. I havent posted for some time as I been

distracitng

> my self with little projects and work, etc. Nada is long gone,

left Dad

> about 15 years ago. However bad memories remain that i cant get

away

> from. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD - (caused by nadas abuse)

and

> some months ago did try to broach the subject with Dad about the

child

> abuse and how relatives had trivialized and denied the incidents.

Only

> to be met with more rejection and the " your mother " blah blah, and

> criticized for complaining yet again for how much I suffered.

>

> So I swallowed my feelings again like so many times before because

they

> never mattered anyhow. Just gratefull that a least i confonted

him. Got

> on with my life and maintained kind of a relationship with Dad

> everything smooth. Then a couple weeks ago there was an incident

at

> work with this woman who is BPD type. It brought back alot of bad

> feelings about my own nada. Well had enough. Complex PTSD is a

whole

> other subject for another thread. But I took it upon myself to

confront

> original source of distress directly.

>

> So I sent my dad an email about the horrific things nada did to me

and

> how he did nothing to get me away from it. I also put in some

shots at

> how relatives would not take the abuse seriously. Specfically a

time

> when nada broke my wrist, I went to his Aunt in tears about this.

Then

> I caught this same Aunt laughing with my Dad about it over a year

> later. That hurt bad and i let him know it.

>

> It's been over a week now and he has not responded. I love my dad

and

> we had a wonderfull relationship but he would just not see what

was

> going on before his very eyes. It hurts.

>

> Thanks for listening, Tina

>

[Guest guest]

Hello, yes i am beginning to feel sad for myself. Its kind of a

change recognizing my own feelings of grief and pain after so many

years of ignoring them. Yes our nada did the food thing. SHe had

other games. Hoarding groceries we'd better not touch but she never

got around to feeding us. afetr reading your post i realize my fada

too went to great lengths justifying nadas abusive behavior. she was

allowed to think feel say and act any way she wanted. but the rest of

us committed a major sin if we dare objected and our protests were

completely ignored.

CPTSD is relatively new on the market. Basically it is unresoved

trauma issues that turn against yourself as you have no way to escape

or no release for it such as being allowed to leave, fight back or

express any evidnece of suffering. It can crop up months or decades

after the original trauma.

Thanks for your post. sorry to hear you have suffered but now you

know you are not alone. ha when i first brached the PTSD subject with

dad and the resons why. his remark. " So you think you are the lone

ranger in suffering " well thanks to this board now i know I am not.

TIna

> >

> >

> > Oh where to start. I havent posted for some time as I been

distracitng

> > my self with little projects and work, etc. Nada is long gone,

left Dad

> > about 15 years ago. However bad memories remain that i cant get

away

> > from. I was diagnosed with complex PTSD - (caused by nadas abuse)

and

> > some months ago did try to broach the subject with Dad about the

child

> > abuse and how relatives had trivialized and denied the incidents.

Only

> > to be met with more rejection and the " your mother " blah blah,

and

> > criticized for complaining yet again for how much I suffered.

> >

> > So I swallowed my feelings again like so many times before

because they

> > never mattered anyhow. Just gratefull that a least i confonted

him. Got

> > on with my life and maintained kind of a relationship with Dad

> > everything smooth. Then a couple weeks ago there was an incident

at

> > work with this woman who is BPD type. It brought back alot of bad

> > feelings about my own nada. Well had enough. Complex PTSD is a

whole

> > other subject for another thread. But I took it upon myself to

confront

> > original source of distress directly.

> >

> > So I sent my dad an email about the horrific things nada did to

me and

> > how he did nothing to get me away from it. I also put in some

shots at

> > how relatives would not take the abuse seriously. Specfically a

time

> > when nada broke my wrist, I went to his Aunt in tears about this.

Then

> > I caught this same Aunt laughing with my Dad about it over a year

> > later. That hurt bad and i let him know it.

> >

> > It's been over a week now and he has not responded. I love my dad

and

> > we had a wonderfull relationship but he would just not see what

was

> > going on before his very eyes. It hurts.

> >

> > Thanks for listening, Tina

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Dud's attitude was pretty similar. His view was he put up with the crap

he did, explained away all our abuse for us (thanks), made excuses for

his dearest beloved wifey, went out to his friends - they wouldn't come

to the house because they knew his wife was an absolute freak (his own

parents and sister wouldn't come), kept the antipeace, etc etc etc etc

etc etc for 14 years... all this according to him was 'for us'. Pewk.

then he fled for his life and left us with Yeti " because kiddies need

their mummies " . Pewk twice please. And then we hardly ever saw him coz

he'd ran off with another NPD freak and she didn't want to have us

around, so sure enough wifey deaest sweet devine, I'll just dump them

like a hot terd and leave them stranded with their antimother and her

abuse and then whinge if they dont worship me for doing ever-so-much for

them. Thanks for nothing, Dud.

> " So you think you are the lone

> ranger in suffering "

Send instant messages to your online friends http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

[Guest guest]

You've nailed it right there: your father abandoned you to a

tasmanian devil, all the while marketing himself as a hero.

Congratulations -- your bullshit meter is working properly.

-Kyla

[Guest guest]

Your bitterness seems equal to my own. My HB these days seems to think

that I am selfish and self-absorbed. I don't think that I am either

selfish or self-absorbed for wanting to care for and nurture my self or

confront the demons in my mind. But, bitter, oh yes I am bitter. I

had four " Dud " 's who just contributed to my Nadas psychosis.

Four " adults " who had the opportunity to really turn things around.

Nothing. That's selfish and self-absorbed!

Khris

> > " So you think you are the lone

> > ranger in suffering "

>

> Send instant messages to your online friends

http://au.messenger.yahoo.com

>

[Guest guest]

Yes he really cared about the well being of his own kids... NOT!

Imagine having kids and then the kiddies expect you to turn around and

give a shit... How selfish they must be!

On Thu, 2008-01-17 at 15:29 +0000, khristinemcmahon wrote:

> Your bitterness seems equal to my own. My HB these days seems to

> think

> that I am selfish and self-absorbed. I don't think that I am either

> selfish or self-absorbed for wanting to care for and nurture my self

> or

> confront the demons in my mind. But, bitter, oh yes I am bitter. I

> had four " Dud " 's who just contributed to my Nadas psychosis.

> Four " adults " who had the opportunity to really turn things around.

> Nothing. That's selfish and self-absorbed!

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