Self-injury/suicidal behavior

[Guest guest]

A question I've had since first learning about BPD is about how they

commonly experience suicidal thoughts and are likely to hurt

themselves, (e.g., cutting). This thought has bothered me for some

time because I have not seen this type of behavior and I'm sure it does

not exist in my family members who are BPD, however, all of the other

typical symptoms are clear and obvious. On the contrary to hurting

themselves, my BPD family members are too narcissistic, it seems, to

ever considering self-injury, unless you consider drinking and driving

suicidal... In reading your posts on this board for the last couple of

months, I don't remember hearing of your BPD family members engaging in

this type of behavior either. Any thoughts?

~Elle

[Guest guest]

My mother would never kill herself, she is just too fucking selfish

to ever do that. Now she has " claimed to want to die " before, and

also drinks and drives all of the time, but my mother is way too

selfish to actually take her own life.

>

> A question I've had since first learning about BPD is about how

they

> commonly experience suicidal thoughts and are likely to hurt

> themselves, (e.g., cutting). This thought has bothered me for some

> time because I have not seen this type of behavior and I'm sure it

does

> not exist in my family members who are BPD, however, all of the

other

> typical symptoms are clear and obvious. On the contrary to hurting

> themselves, my BPD family members are too narcissistic, it seems,

to

> ever considering self-injury, unless you consider drinking and

driving

> suicidal... In reading your posts on this board for the last

couple of

> months, I don't remember hearing of your BPD family members

engaging in

> this type of behavior either. Any thoughts?

> ~Elle

>

[Guest guest]

Elle,

My nada fits all the criteria except this one too. Just remember they do not

have to follow

all the criteria. Children of BPD's that act out usually end up on this board.

Those that act

in (cutters and suicidal) tend to be the ones that seek help for themselves or

have to be committed due to being a danger to themselves. I would not worry

myself about her not

meeting this one part of the criteria.

Carla

>

> A question I've had since first learning about BPD is about how they

> commonly experience suicidal thoughts and are likely to hurt

> themselves, (e.g., cutting). This thought has bothered me for some

> time because I have not seen this type of behavior and I'm sure it does

> not exist in my family members who are BPD, however, all of the other

> typical symptoms are clear and obvious. On the contrary to hurting

> themselves, my BPD family members are too narcissistic, it seems, to

> ever considering self-injury, unless you consider drinking and driving

> suicidal... In reading your posts on this board for the last couple of

> months, I don't remember hearing of your BPD family members engaging in

> this type of behavior either. Any thoughts?

> ~Elle

>

[Guest guest]

I thought this thread was very interesting--

I agree with the other posts, my nada is too self-absorbed and narcisstic to

actually hurt herself or commit suicide. She talks about poisoning herself in

her garden someday (to avoid being sent to a nursing home) but I don't think

she'd ever actually do it, she's far too vain.

My nada also doesn't abuse drugs or alchol, quite the opposite really, but

she's a compulsive and dangerous spender, she blows through money like it's

water, and she's a very reckless driver.

Some of the BPD traits seem to actually be contradictory so it makes sense

that no one's BP parent would be 100% of the DSM definition of Borderline.

robinson4963 wrote:

A question I've had since first learning about BPD is about how they

commonly experience suicidal thoughts and are likely to hurt

themselves, (e.g., cutting). This thought has bothered me for some

time because I have not seen this type of behavior and I'm sure it does

not exist in my family members who are BPD, however, all of the other

typical symptoms are clear and obvious. On the contrary to hurting

themselves, my BPD family members are too narcissistic, it seems, to

ever considering self-injury, unless you consider drinking and driving

suicidal... In reading your posts on this board for the last couple of

months, I don't remember hearing of your BPD family members engaging in

this type of behavior either. Any thoughts?

~Elle

---------------------------------

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[Guest guest]

my nada is too self-absorbed and narcisstic to actually hurt herself

or commit suicide. She talks about poisoning herself in her garden

someday (to avoid being sent to a nursing home) but I don't think

she'd ever actually do it, she's far too vain.

>

> My nada also doesn't abuse drugs or alchol, quite the opposite

really, but she's a compulsive and dangerous spender, she blows

through money like it's water, and she's a very reckless driver.

>

Wow! You just described mine to a T!!

[Guest guest]

The last time I read anything current about this, it was that

physicians have found that both self-injury and suicide in BPDs is

much less prevalent than originally thought. At one time, many

physicians thought that self-injury had to be present, or the person

did not have BPD. That is no longer the case, and it seems to bear

up under what has been shared on this forum.

sylvia

>

> A question I've had since first learning about BPD is about how

they

> commonly experience suicidal thoughts and are likely to hurt

> themselves, (e.g., cutting). This thought has bothered me for

some

> time because I have not seen this type of behavior and I'm sure it

does

> not exist in my family members who are BPD, however, all of the

other

> typical symptoms are clear and obvious. On the contrary to

hurting

> themselves, my BPD family members are too narcissistic, it seems,

to

> ever considering self-injury, unless you consider drinking and

driving

> suicidal... In reading your posts on this board for the last

couple of

> months, I don't remember hearing of your BPD family members

engaging in

> this type of behavior either. Any thoughts?

> ~Elle

>

[Guest guest]

Wow - I always thought when you called the police for a suicide that

the 'patient' was admitted to a psych hospital, at least for 48

hours observation. That is terrible that they didn't do more. I

would continue calling 911, however, whenever she would threaten

suicide. Maybe the commit 'repeat' offenders?

Sylvia

> > >

> > > A question I've had since first learning about BPD is about

how they

> > > commonly experience suicidal thoughts and are likely to hurt

> > > themselves, (e.g., cutting). This thought has bothered me for

some

> > > time because I have not seen this type of behavior and I'm

sure it

> does

> > > not exist in my family members who are BPD, however, all of

the other

> > > typical symptoms are clear and obvious. On the contrary to

hurting

> > > themselves, my BPD family members are too narcissistic, it

seems, to

> > > ever considering self-injury, unless you consider drinking and

> driving

> > > suicidal... In reading your posts on this board for the last

> couple of

> > > months, I don't remember hearing of your BPD family members

> engaging in

> > > this type of behavior either. Any thoughts?

> > > ~Elle

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

my nada would lock herself in her room and threaten to kill herself

with the gun she kept in there but that was as far as it went. she

would never actually attempt to

>

> A question I've had since first learning about BPD is about how

they

> commonly experience suicidal thoughts and are likely to hurt

> themselves, (e.g., cutting). This thought has bothered me for some

> time because I have not seen this type of behavior and I'm sure it

does

> not exist in my family members who are BPD, however, all of the

other

> typical symptoms are clear and obvious. On the contrary to hurting

> themselves, my BPD family members are too narcissistic, it seems,

to

> ever considering self-injury, unless you consider drinking and

driving

> suicidal... In reading your posts on this board for the last

couple of

> months, I don't remember hearing of your BPD family members

engaging in

> this type of behavior either. Any thoughts?

> ~Elle

>

[Guest guest]

Broomie,

Sounds like your nada has figured out how to get her way. How sad that your

sister is still

falling for it and trying to get you to go along for the ride. That has got to

create a lot of friction between you. Of course a DBT therapist would say " so

why don't you take the

pills " or so I have read. I really LIKE what I have read about DBT thus far.

Carla

> My Nada in her late 20's, took an over dose of pills after she created a

> big drama and accused my dad of all sorts of untruths which she believes to

> be all true. Nada said she did it to get a reaction out of Dad for her pain

> he had caused her...Years later, when my sister in her teens confronted

> Nada and told Nada about all the terrible things Nada had done and said to

> her growing up, Nada then went in the bedroom and got a bottle of pills and

> told Dad she would take them if my sister did not take back what she had

> said. So Dad came out and told my sister she had to tell Nada she made it

> all up, that it was lies and that Nada was a good mom, so Nada would not

> take the pills. My sister did exactly what Dad told her.....sounds like

> emotional blackmail to me..No more episodes since, however my sibling

> always fears this could happen again and since she presently is now trying

> to do battle with me and I am not responding the way she wants, my sister

> always fears she could do it again if I/we don't give in to her, beg for

> forgiveness, say sorry, we are wrong, she is right, etc....and i am not

> doing that...My sister said to me recently, that I am the first person in

> the family to ever stand up to her and not give in to her demands...So who

> knows how this will play out but I can't/won't take responsibility for her

> behaviour....cheers Broomie

>