BPD MOM - Misery in a paperback

[Guest guest]

I am in the process of writing an auto-biography.

The toughest part ? How am I going to tell my BPD Mom that I'm doing

so. One of several themes in the book will be my relationship with

her. It obviously isn't going to be pretty.

Ironically enough, this quandary is the perfect example of her

control over my emotions.

In one simultaneous emotion I'm:

1. Proud (to write the book)

2. Angry (that she is has control of my emotions/life)

3. Sad (when the anger dissapates)

4. Guilt ridden (that I'm going to set her off)

5. Fearful (that she may kill herself)

6. Dumbfounded (that the central theme in my life is escaping her)

Can anyone relate to feeling all those feelings simultaneously and

convincing yourself that you're the first, only and last person on

the planet who has.

Any advice?

PS Posting/reading here has been one of the only things that has

lightened the load for me.