Guest guest Posted June 4, 2006 Report Share Posted June 4, 2006 I'm not sure they are helping, I have been conditioned to believe they are helping. Hope that makes sense. Nothing major was going on in my life when the anxiety hit. I have a wonderful marriage of 17 1/2 years, and four kids, I was busy but there was no stressful event going on in my life. > > << I am very scared about going off, as I > never ever want to be in that horrible depressed state ever again! >> > > > What is causing you to want to come off the drugs at this point, if > you feel they are helping you in some way? > > > <<Before I was hospitalized I was never on any psychotropic drugs, > didn't believe in them! Then I was plunged into anxiety so bad I > didnt know what to do with myself and was afraid to go anywhere. >> > > > Do you know what caused this suden anxiety? What was going on in your > life at the time? Had anything changed suddenly? > > > > I think it's interesting that you went from being medicated for > suddenly-occurring anxiety symptoms into deep depression and > suicidality, to taking up to eight psychotropic medications daily, > including antipsychotics, and being diagnosed with bipolar and > generalized anxiety disorder. > > > The depression and suicidality didn't occur until after you were given > klonopin and Paxil. This is a very common experience....people just > tend not to make the connection between the drugs and the symptoms > causd by them because doctors put an entirely different slant on the > picture. > > > The good news is that people really do recover from all of this and > live drug-free. We have many members here who can attest to that! > > > > > > > -- > KIM DENISE FINE ART > www.Kim.com > > Fine Art Gifts > www.CafePress.com/Kim > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 7, 2006 Report Share Posted June 7, 2006 Dear Jenifer, You said: <<Hello all, my name is Jenifer Elwanger, and I have been diagnosed with bipolar II and GAD. I have been hospitalized once two years ago with major depressive disorder with suicidal tendency, and have been on various meds. I am currently on Effexor XR 450mg, Depakote ER 1000mg, and Cymbalta 60mg. I just came off of Abilify two weeks ago due to tremors. I have gained 80 pounds since being on meds, which is highly discouraging. I still have depression (I guess you can't wipe that out) and quite a bit of restlessness. For example, if I am not occupied with something, I am walking the house, back and forth, back and forth. Not what I would call anxiety, not boredom, just the feeling of not knowing what to do with myself. I have read that Effexor and Cymbalta are two of the hardest meds to come off of, which scares me a little!>> ** Effexor and Cymbalta provide no more challenge to discontinue than any other antidepressant. You said: <<I'm in the middle of a psychiatrist change due to a change of my husband's insurance company, but the psychiatrist I have been seeing is very quick to add more meds to the cocktail. I have been resistant to this, but am still on the three meds, down from 8! Any help or suggestions I can get would be terrific.>> ** Would you please be specific about the drugs you took, how long you were on each, and how long it took you to come off each? Did it occur to you as each drug was being added that if these drugs worked you wouldn't be taking 8 of them? I'm trying to get a handle on how many years you have been taking each drug and over what period of time they were discontinued. If you are including these details in your consultation for there is no need to answer them here unless you want to copy and paste them in so Kim, , (moderators), and others know what has been happening. Regards, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted July 24, 2006 Report Share Posted July 24, 2006 I wanted to introduce myself as I'm a newbie, so here goes: My name is Terri, I am nearly 47 years old and have been on Prozac and Desyrel for nearly 15 years. I have always had problems with "depression" - anorexia/bulimia during childhood, etc. But never did it hit me so severely as after I had my son (who is now 16 years old). My "issues" were extreme insomnia which to me then culminated in extreme anxiety and depression. I went for nearly a year being undiagnosed (at that time they weren't as knowledgeable about postpartum depression) - dragged myself to many doctors only to be given prescriptions for sleeping pills (impossible to take when you have a newborn!). My key to "survival" at that time was to take a sleeping pill on Saturday nights only (when my then-husband could get up with the baby) which allowed me to get at least 8 hours of sleep a week (by Thursdays, I was a mess!) Anyway,- I eventually found a psychiatrist who prescribed me Prozac and Desyrel (for sleep) - It took nearly a year for me to feel somewhat "normal", and I have to admit that I was so thankful for finding someone who took me seriously! I have tried getting off of Prozac at least 3 times - I've done it quickly, as per doctor's orders, and I've also done it slowly, none of which worked. For me, my key symptoms of depression are not usual "depression" - instead, I get incredibly hyper and just physically can't get to sleep. I don't know which comes first - does the insomnia cause the anxiety, or does the anxiety cause the insomnia? Either way, it's a vicious cycle. I have, however, just recently decided to do lots of research on my own and different vitamins/herbs etc. for "replacement" of Prozac. I have tapered off the Desyrel (was on 25 mg and gradually came off it entirely - it has been six weeks). I started taking magnesium taurate on my own, plus have added 5HTP to my list of vitamins. Supposedly, 5HTP is a derivative of tryptophan which years ago was taken off the market (strangely enough, right around the same time that Prozac came about!). I also take melatonin about once a week.... At one point, I was taking nearly 60 mg of Prozac - the last few years, however, it has been about 25 mg. It seems everytime I get below 20 mg of Prozac, symptoms for me start to return.... I have read all of the files from the group - my only problem thus far is that I have colitis, so most veggies are totally out of my realm of possibility. I rarely have sugar, tend to eat lots of protein, brown rice, etc. I do however fight to keep my weight UP due to the colitis, so I am forever trying to keep on an extra 5-8 pounds (which never seems to happen)......I also exercise (cardio, weight lifting, pilates, etc) so I truly believe that my body just needs some extra nutrients that I'm just starting to learn about.... Thank you for letting me join....I look forward to meeting everyone! Terri Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 14, 2008 Report Share Posted February 14, 2008 Denene Harper wrote: > > I am married, I have a service dog that assist me but as of recently she hasn't been helping as much due to being diagnosed with hip dylpsia how ever it is spelled. Denene, Welcome and I am sorry about your pain and the pain your dog is going thru. Don't you worry about your dogs pain, can the service organization send you another dog and retire this one. You could keep here as family pet. I worry about her hip giving out when you are depending on her, this is not good and probably will happen in the future. I think I would contact the organization and if they give you a problem the ASPCA. I can tell you are worried about your self and her I am curious what they say if you contact them . Well hope you have assistance with your pain and your dog does not react to the cold. My dog broke her foot (front paw) and when it gets cold, she has problems with it in the winter. She will hold up her paw to me as if to say, " Mom fix it " I put her paw under the electric blanket and she likes that. Hope you get to feeling better. Bennie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2008 Report Share Posted February 28, 2008 Moderator's note: I want to welcome you, and all the new members in the group. We have so many new people each week, it's hard to keep up with them. What name shall we call you? It's so much easier to communicate with someone if we have some kind of name to use. A nickname is fine too. Kaylene I wanted to introduce myself. I am a 29 year old female and have been living with chronic pain for 6 1/2 years. I currently have degenerative disc disease, supra-ventricular tachycardia, and severe carpal tunnel syndrome. The doctors have not excluded an auto immune disease, such as Lupus or Rheumatoid Arthritis, yet. My neurosurgeon is wanting to use a spinal fusion on my lumbar spine as a " last resort. " I see a hand and wrist specialist on the 14th of April. I am currently taking several " natural " supplements, along with two heart medications, anti-inflammatory medication, muscle relaxers, and two different prescription pain medications. Thanks for listening to my story! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 28, 2008 Report Share Posted February 28, 2008 Thank you so much for the warm welcome. All of this is new to me, so thank you for giving me a chance to figure it all out! I would like to go by " Tam. " I will be sure to use that nickname in my signature. Thanks again! Kaylene wrote: What name shall we call you? It's so much easier to communicate with someone if we have some kind of name to use. A nickname is fine too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 --- Cornelia, I have a couple of suggestions. I suggest that you calmly talk to her (in the absence of your children), and with a poker face ( " don't let them smell fear " - from an earlier post by ) tell her that this living situation isn't working for any of you. Tell her that you realize that your kids get on her nerves. Try not to make it sound blaming, but just that this situation isn't working and you're afraid of the consequences for everyone if it continues. Then bring up options such as retirement homes, apts, etc, which you will have already researched. Think of this as just an introductory conversation on the topic, to " get her used to the idea " and to let her see that your mind is made up and you are not going to be distracted or escalate into an argument with her. Anticipate what she will say, how she will try to bait you, then calmly, don't take the bait. If she thinks you are serious, she may start to accept the idea. This is will involve your really thinking about your underlying fears and how you may address them. This situation is not going to get any better. Dealing with a teenager with RAD will be difficult enough without your mother's interference. You may want to seek some support and assistance from a therapist. You may have to do some research as to your rights (similar to when preparing for a divorce). Joanna In WTOAdultChildren1 , " Cornie_Talley " wrote: > > Hi, > > After 59 years, I've had it with my mother. She has been living with > me and my kids for over 6 years and her behavior becomes more > intolerable daily. A little background: I'm single and adopted > three kids internationally as a single mom. I was a first-time mom > at 51. I'd always wanted to have kids but I was too afraid I'd be > the kind of parent my mother was/is. My kids are 7, 9 and 13. The > 13 year old has been with me for 18 months; she has reactive > attachment disorder and oppositional defiant disorder. If I had > known, I wouldn't have adopted her, but she's mine now. If I had > known the most volatile of personality disorders to place together, I > couldn't have done a better job. My mother hates my daughter and > takes every opportunity to let her know. My mother has always needed > a target. When I was a kid (only child) my cousin lived with us for > awhile until she ran away to get away from my mother. Then, after my > father died and my mother remarried a man with daughter; my > stepsister is a phenomenal person, given the amount of physical, > verbal and emotional abuse she endured from age 9 forward. My mother > was always " good " to me - not particularly physically or verbally > abusive except for the times when she perceived I was rebelling and > then (and to this day) she will say, " I don't know why you hate me so > much. I'm going to get a gun, go into the woods and blow my brains > out. " This, of course, scared me when I was a kid but I came to > realize that for all her threats there was nothing behind it except > manipulation. > > She has been physically, emotionally and verbally abusive to my 9 > year old as well. My 7 year old is a very adorable, sweet natured, > easy going kid and is the golden child who can do no wrong and is > getting brainwashed that her sisters are the devil incarnate. And > the abuse always occurs when I'm not there. If I walk down the long > driveway to the mailbox, she'll smack one or both of the two older > girls or tell them they're worthless, stupid, ugly. > > I need to get her out of my home (yes, it's my home). But each time > I've brought it up, my mother says she's going to call CPS and I'll > never see my children again, that I've stolen all of her money, that > I just throw people away, that she'll have me charged with elder > abuse, etc. And once that happens I have a hard time staying focused > and usually say, " I'm not part of this conversation, " and walk away. > > Have any of you had to extricate an elderly parent from your home? > If so, how did you manage it? My mother is 88, has all her > faculties, is healthy and still drives. > > Thank you! > > Cornelia > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 Hi Joanna, Thanks. I've been down this road several times. My RAD kid is in therapy for RAD and all else and my other two are in therapy just because... and I'm in therapy to get my mother out of my house. I have repeatedly had the calm, collected " conversation " (one-sided, until she blows up) about moving out using all the nonfingerpointing techniques and language I can think of. It devolves with her saying, " I'm only going feet first. " She just turned 88, is healthy as a horse, sharp and basically with it. She has minor short-term forgetfulness (which means that the kids and I never told her something when we all agree she was told). She recalls everything from the distant past in her BP-this-is-the-way-it-was kind of way. I've got a lawyer friend dealing with the eviction from my home. Because she's been with me so long (never have I worked so hard at something and been such an utter failure) there apparently are legal reasons why she can contest the eviction. BTW, I'm an atty too, but not that kind and I'm much, much too close to the situation to be clinical. Fortunately my mother has no vested interest in my property and hasn't paid rent or contributed in any significant way to household expenses - because, of course, it's my responsibility to take care of her because she gave me life, as she's so quick to point out. I've presented her with a number of options - market rate apartments, senior complexes, assisted living, with literature, costs, availability, etc. It gets dumped in the recycling can. She says she cannot afford it, yet she buys St. 's suits and dresses for $1500 a pop. That habit would have to stop if she were actually responsible for paying rent! So the bottom line is that I have to evict her, have my locks changed. And I'm almost paralyzed with the guilt of evicting her even though she's made and continues to make my life and my kids' lives living hell. My RAD kid's therapist read me the riot act about betraying my kids by not kicking nada out. Nada would go if I pay for it, but I can't afford it. I work parttime so I can attend all those school and sports functions for my three kids and be a presence in their lives for more than two hours a day. Cornelia On Fri, May 30, 2008 at 10:58 AM, joannaandsophie wrote: > --- > Cornelia, > I have a couple of suggestions. I suggest that you calmly talk to > her (in the absence of your children), and with a poker face ( " don't > let them smell fear " - from an earlier post by ) tell her that > this living situation isn't working for any of you. Tell her that > you realize that your kids get on her nerves. Try not to make it > sound blaming, but just that this situation isn't working and you're > afraid of the consequences for everyone if it continues. Then bring > up options such as retirement homes, apts, etc, which you will have > already researched. Think of this as just an introductory > conversation on the topic, to " get her used to the idea " and to let > her see that your mind is made up and you are not going to be > distracted or escalate into an argument with her. Anticipate what > she will say, how she will try to bait you, then calmly, don't take > the bait. If she thinks you are serious, she may start to accept the > idea. This is will involve your really thinking about your > underlying fears and how you may address them. > > This situation is not going to get any better. Dealing with a > teenager with RAD will be difficult enough without your mother's > interference. You may want to seek some support and assistance from > a therapist. You may have to do some research as to your rights > (similar to when preparing for a divorce). > > Joanna > > In WTOAdultChildren1 <WTOAdultChildren1%40yahoogroups.com>, > " Cornie_Talley " > wrote: > > > > Hi, > > > > After 59 years, I've had it with my mother. She has been living > with > > me and my kids for over 6 years and her behavior becomes more > > intolerable daily. A little background: I'm single and adopted > > three kids internationally as a single mom. I was a first-time mom > > at 51. I'd always wanted to have kids but I was too afraid I'd be > > the kind of parent my mother was/is. My kids are 7, 9 and 13. The > > 13 year old has been with me for 18 months; she has reactive > > attachment disorder and oppositional defiant disorder. If I had > > known, I wouldn't have adopted her, but she's mine now. If I had > > known the most volatile of personality disorders to place together, > I > > couldn't have done a better job. My mother hates my daughter and > > takes every opportunity to let her know. My mother has always > needed > > a target. When I was a kid (only child) my cousin lived with us > for > > awhile until she ran away to get away from my mother. Then, after > my > > father died and my mother remarried a man with daughter; my > > stepsister is a phenomenal person, given the amount of physical, > > verbal and emotional abuse she endured from age 9 forward. My > mother > > was always " good " to me - not particularly physically or verbally > > abusive except for the times when she perceived I was rebelling and > > then (and to this day) she will say, " I don't know why you hate me > so > > much. I'm going to get a gun, go into the woods and blow my brains > > out. " This, of course, scared me when I was a kid but I came to > > realize that for all her threats there was nothing behind it except > > manipulation. > > > > She has been physically, emotionally and verbally abusive to my 9 > > year old as well. My 7 year old is a very adorable, sweet natured, > > easy going kid and is the golden child who can do no wrong and is > > getting brainwashed that her sisters are the devil incarnate. And > > the abuse always occurs when I'm not there. If I walk down the > long > > driveway to the mailbox, she'll smack one or both of the two older > > girls or tell them they're worthless, stupid, ugly. > > > > I need to get her out of my home (yes, it's my home). But each > time > > I've brought it up, my mother says she's going to call CPS and I'll > > never see my children again, that I've stolen all of her money, > that > > I just throw people away, that she'll have me charged with elder > > abuse, etc. And once that happens I have a hard time staying > focused > > and usually say, " I'm not part of this conversation, " and walk away. > > > > Have any of you had to extricate an elderly parent from your home? > > If so, how did you manage it? My mother is 88, has all her > > faculties, is healthy and still drives. > > > > Thank you! > > > > Cornelia > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 30, 2008 Report Share Posted May 30, 2008 -- Cornelia, Sorry - sounds like things are very bad and you know what you have to do. Try not to let fear and guilt get the best of you. Joanna In WTOAdultChildren1 , " Cornelia Talley " wrote: > > Hi Joanna, > > Thanks. I've been down this road several times. My RAD kid is in therapy > for RAD and all else and my other two are in therapy just because... and I'm > in therapy to get my mother out of my house. I have repeatedly had the > calm, collected " conversation " (one-sided, until she blows up) about moving > out using all the nonfingerpointing techniques and language I can think of. > It devolves with her saying, " I'm only going feet first. " She just turned > 88, is healthy as a horse, sharp and basically with it. She has minor > short-term forgetfulness (which means that the kids and I never told her > something when we all agree she was told). She recalls everything from the > distant past in her BP-this-is-the-way-it-was kind of way. I've got a > lawyer friend dealing with the eviction from my home. Because she's been > with me so long (never have I worked so hard at something and been such an > utter failure) there apparently are legal reasons why she can contest the > eviction. BTW, I'm an atty too, but not that kind and I'm much, much too > close to the situation to be clinical. Fortunately my mother has no vested > interest in my property and hasn't paid rent or contributed in any > significant way to household expenses - because, of course, it's my > responsibility to take care of her because she gave me life, as she's so > quick to point out. I've presented her with a number of options - market > rate apartments, senior complexes, assisted living, with literature, costs, > availability, etc. It gets dumped in the recycling can. She says she > cannot afford it, yet she buys St. 's suits and dresses for $1500 a > pop. That habit would have to stop if she were actually responsible for > paying rent! > > So the bottom line is that I have to evict her, have my locks changed. And > I'm almost paralyzed with the guilt of evicting her even though she's made > and continues to make my life and my kids' lives living hell. My RAD kid's > therapist read me the riot act about betraying my kids by not kicking nada > out. Nada would go if I pay for it, but I can't afford it. I work parttime > so I can attend all those school and sports functions for my three kids and > be a presence in their lives for more than two hours a day. > > Cornelia > > > > > On Fri, May 30, 2008 at 10:58 AM, joannaandsophie > wrote: > > > --- > > Cornelia, > > I have a couple of suggestions. I suggest that you calmly talk to > > her (in the absence of your children), and with a poker face ( " don't > > let them smell fear " - from an earlier post by ) tell her that > > this living situation isn't working for any of you. Tell her that > > you realize that your kids get on her nerves. Try not to make it > > sound blaming, but just that this situation isn't working and you're > > afraid of the consequences for everyone if it continues. Then bring > > up options such as retirement homes, apts, etc, which you will have > > already researched. Think of this as just an introductory > > conversation on the topic, to " get her used to the idea " and to let > > her see that your mind is made up and you are not going to be > > distracted or escalate into an argument with her. Anticipate what > > she will say, how she will try to bait you, then calmly, don't take > > the bait. If she thinks you are serious, she may start to accept the > > idea. This is will involve your really thinking about your > > underlying fears and how you may address them. > > > > This situation is not going to get any better. Dealing with a > > teenager with RAD will be difficult enough without your mother's > > interference. You may want to seek some support and assistance from > > a therapist. You may have to do some research as to your rights > > (similar to when preparing for a divorce). > > > > Joanna > > > > In WTOAdultChildren1 <WTOAdultChildren1% 40yahoogroups.com>, > > " Cornie_Talley " > > <cornie98110@> wrote: > > > > > > Hi, > > > > > > After 59 years, I've had it with my mother. She has been living > > with > > > me and my kids for over 6 years and her behavior becomes more > > > intolerable daily. A little background: I'm single and adopted > > > three kids internationally as a single mom. I was a first-time mom > > > at 51. I'd always wanted to have kids but I was too afraid I'd be > > > the kind of parent my mother was/is. My kids are 7, 9 and 13. The > > > 13 year old has been with me for 18 months; she has reactive > > > attachment disorder and oppositional defiant disorder. If I had > > > known, I wouldn't have adopted her, but she's mine now. If I had > > > known the most volatile of personality disorders to place together, > > I > > > couldn't have done a better job. My mother hates my daughter and > > > takes every opportunity to let her know. My mother has always > > needed > > > a target. When I was a kid (only child) my cousin lived with us > > for > > > awhile until she ran away to get away from my mother. Then, after > > my > > > father died and my mother remarried a man with daughter; my > > > stepsister is a phenomenal person, given the amount of physical, > > > verbal and emotional abuse she endured from age 9 forward. My > > mother > > > was always " good " to me - not particularly physically or verbally > > > abusive except for the times when she perceived I was rebelling and > > > then (and to this day) she will say, " I don't know why you hate me > > so > > > much. I'm going to get a gun, go into the woods and blow my brains > > > out. " This, of course, scared me when I was a kid but I came to > > > realize that for all her threats there was nothing behind it except > > > manipulation. > > > > > > She has been physically, emotionally and verbally abusive to my 9 > > > year old as well. My 7 year old is a very adorable, sweet natured, > > > easy going kid and is the golden child who can do no wrong and is > > > getting brainwashed that her sisters are the devil incarnate. And > > > the abuse always occurs when I'm not there. If I walk down the > > long > > > driveway to the mailbox, she'll smack one or both of the two older > > > girls or tell them they're worthless, stupid, ugly. > > > > > > I need to get her out of my home (yes, it's my home). But each > > time > > > I've brought it up, my mother says she's going to call CPS and I'll > > > never see my children again, that I've stolen all of her money, > > that > > > I just throw people away, that she'll have me charged with elder > > > abuse, etc. And once that happens I have a hard time staying > > focused > > > and usually say, " I'm not part of this conversation, " and walk away. > > > > > > Have any of you had to extricate an elderly parent from your home? > > > If so, how did you manage it? My mother is 88, has all her > > > faculties, is healthy and still drives. > > > > > > Thank you! > > > > > > Cornelia > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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