Hello! New member thanks... and a crazy story that made me seek this group out!

[Guest guest]

Hello all,

Thank you so much for posting your stories and helpful, kind comments

on this message board. I have been reading for a few weeks and just

hearing other stories has helped me immensely!

I knew nothing about BPD until a few weeks ago. I was looking at a

self help book section for something for children dealing with insane

parents. I found " Stop Walking on Eggshells " which led me here

So I just have to rant a little about this absolutely insane episode I

had with my Nada this past year. First, I am still in my early 20s and

a graduate student living off a measly stipend, so I am self

sufficient + a little extra, but also not making a ton of money.

Because I have good credit tons of those credit card offers get sent

to my parent's house. My parents aren't too well off mostly because my

Nada spends uncontrollably in a way that doesn't make sense. She is a

pack-rat extraordinare and buys stuff she doesn't need, which

subsequently gets lost in the mess and she buys the same stuff all

over again.

So... my Nada maxed out the credit cards and decided to open a few

Credit Cards in my name, each with a $5000 spending limit. She

proceeded to max those out and didn't pay the bill. I only find out

about all this when I have the creditor start harassing me about

paying. Of course I assumed someone stole my identity, only to find it

was my IDIOT MOTHER! Because it was a family member, the cards had to

be paid or I could take my parents to court. The latter would have

cost me more than the $10,000 in debt so I just paid it and thankfully

got my credit rating restored, but I was SO FREAKING MAD that my

parents drained every last penny of savings I had worked for since

high school! Of course, my stupid mother didn't even apologize and

screamed at me a lot through out this entire episode and my Dad really

never even acknowledged the situation. I don't know why I felt guiled

into bailing them out. The have never given me anything of value, so

it's not like paying them back (I have been 100% self sufficient since

I turned 18). I talked to my dad about taking away Nada's spending

power (she doesn't even have a job, so she definitely doesn't deserve

to go spending like craziness) and he didn't even have to courage to

stand up to her on that!

So here is the punch line. My NADA told everyone in the family that I

HAD RACKED UP $10,000 IN DEBT AND THEY HAD TO BAIL ME OUT!!! That

stupid bitch!!! I was the freaking family pariah at Christmas and my

Nada would freaking throw a fit anytime I talked to someone (obviously

for fear that the truth would come out). I was massively pissed off

before but also finally feel like I have escaped the 'being in oz'

feeling after this stupefying episode. After all the wacky and abusive

BPD shit my mother has pulled over the years, this is the most insane.

While a lot of people on this message board are considering going NC

or LC, I am trying to consider ways to protect myself from them or

even ways to safeguard them against themselves. Despite the years of

sustained abuse, I am able to consider them objectively as prodigal

children most of the time. (Well, sometimes I get worked up when my

Nada has her frequent insanity bursts, but I am working on removing

myself emotionally). Luckly I have a very understanding boyfriend

(probably because he has experienced many an attack) and a great bro

and sis.

Should I say good riddance to the parents? Any advice?