The narc and envy - also from Malignant self love

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Prone to magical thinking, the narcissist is deeply convinced of the

transcendental meaning of his life. He fervently believes in his own

uniqueness and " mission " . He constantly searches for clues regarding the

hidden - though inevitable - meaning of his personal life. The narcissist is

forever a " public persona " , even when alone, in the confines of his bedroom.

His every move, his every act, his every decision and every scribbling is of

momentous consequence. The narcissist often documents his life with vigil,

for the benefit of future biographers. His every utterance and shred of

correspondence are carefully orchestrated as befitting a historical figure

of import.

This grandiose background leads to an exaggerated sense of entitlement. The

narcissist feels that he is worthy of special and immediate treatment by the

most qualified. His time is too precious to be wasted by bureaucratic

trifles, misunderstandings, underlings, and social conventions. His mission

is urgent. Other people are expected both to share the narcissist's

self-assessment - and to behave accordingly: to accommodate his needs,

instantly comply with his wishes, and succumb to his whims.

But the world does not always accommodate, comply, and succumb. It often

resists the wishes of the narcissist, mocks his comportment, or, worst of

all, ignores him. The narcissist reacts to this with a cycle of frustration

and aggression.

Still, it is not always possible to express naked aggression. It may be

dangerous, or counterproductive, or plain silly. Even the narcissist cannot

attack his boss, or a policeman, or the neighbourhood bully with impunity.

So, the narcissist's aggression wears many forms. The narcissist suddenly

becomes brutally " honest " , or bitingly " humorous " , or smotheringly

" helpful " , or sexually " experimental " , or socially " reclusive " , or

behaviourally " different " , or find yet another way to express his scathing

and repressed hostility.

The narcissist's favourite sadistic cocktail is brutal honesty coupled with

" helpful advice " and " concern " for the welfare of the person attacked. The

narcissist blurts out - often unprovoked - hurtful observations. These

statements are invariably couched in a socially impeccable context.

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