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, it's cortisol.

Look at everything. You just had a stressful transcontinental trip after staying with unsupportive family members for 2 weeks, immediately started a new job, and you also added the cycling into your routine. I wouldn't even consider doing all that at once, and I have years of recovery under my belt.

A VERY QUIET weekend will help you feel better. If you can find an alternative to cycling, that might also help. Just reduce as much stimulation as you possibly can, and understand that you are sensitive to this stuff. No amount of pushing yourself is going to reduce the sensitivity. You have to work with it.

Try to stop reacting so strongly to these symptoms, and instead regard them as clues to what your body needs. Be a scientist and observe, instead of reacting. This is a problem that needs to eb solved in a methodical way--it is not an emotional crisis, regardless of the emotional symptoms that arise. Does that make sense?

Warm regards,

Kim

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Hi all,Just hoping for a bit of advice.I started a new job this past week. It seems to be very well suited to what I want/need at the moment. One day off in the week. School vacations off. I'm cycling again, working with people, in an environment that is familiar, in a different and interesting context from what I was used to in the past.The first two days went well. I left my three-and-a-half-year-old with a child minder and thought about her a few times, but got on with what I was doing and pretty much enjoyed it.Today I feel totally ripped apart by . . . body chemistry? I don't know. I don't think a minute has passed when I haven't wanted to cry. I cried this morning; I locked myself in the toilets and cried at lunchtime; I cried when I cycled over a bump in the sidewalk and a pannier fell off my bike; I cried when I collected my daughter and she said how much she misses me in the day. Whenever I thought of her today the tears came. It was hard to stop imagining her bursting through the doors and running over to me to give me a big hug.If I could, I would throw this whole job away. It's just that if I want to carry on as I am with diet and supplements, we need the money to pay for it, which means me working. Also I thought it was just what I needed to give my healing a boost.I think I need to give things time to settle. It just surprises and frightens me, how out of sorts I am right now. At first I was proud of all the organising I did, from cooking lunches the evening before, to working out where I can cycle on the sidewalk and where I have to go on the road. To be honest the cycling was exhausting today, as I'm not used to it anymore.I'm so low. I feel overwhelmed. In a way I feel like I've lost my life. If this is biochemical, might I feel better in a few days if I rest over the weekend?Thanks,. -- KIM DENISE FINE ART

www.Kim.comFine Art Giftswww.CafePress.com/Kim

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Yes, what you said makes sense, Kim.

Flooding cortisol has been my nemesis for months now. It's hard

sometimes to identify it though. Sometimes I get diarrhoea, which I

did one day this week, and then it went away. Sometimes I get a

racing heart. Sometimes my sleep is very disturbed in the early

morning. The past couple of days I haven't had many of those

symptoms. But looking at the other things I said -- crying, feeling

low -- those can be symptoms too.

It isn't as easy to rest now as it was. I used to have a quiet day

at home. Now on a work day, certain things have to be done, and on

non-work days there's more pressure to get jobs done like cutting

the grass or cleaning the bathroom. However, I don't intend to do

much of that this weekend.

The cycling is a tricky one. I wasn't able to build up to it like I

would have liked. My thinking was that it will be hard at first, but

get easier as my muscles grow. However, if it gets really hard next

week, I can get the car off Chris. I'll see how I go there.

You're right, all those things that happened to me lately are crazy.

The stress of getting ready for the US trip, PLUS finding and

interviewing for a job, was pretty big. Being in the US was

stressful. The traveling was stressful. I did well at the beginning

of this week but it's entirely possible that it's catching up with

me now.

I started feeling much more calm not long after I wrote my last post

actually. The weekend's coming up, so no preparing meals for

tomorrow. Just a quiet evening with . has been going to

the supermarket so I don't have to deal with that particular stress,

and he's there now.

I still have a tendency to think that when I feel bad, this is the

way it's going to stay. I just hope I can start to get this cortisol

problem sorted. My healing was going well until money/job issues at

the beginning of July, and since then I've been low and numb quite a

lot of the time, hoping I'll feel human again some day.

In fact, truth be told, I'd better get off the computer because I

shouldn't be using it at night. It's just wonderful to see you here

again Kim, and I thank you for your patience and wise words.

.

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The cycling is contributing to the cortisol problem. Any exercise beyond gentle walking will do it to you. It isn't a matter of building up your muscles or endurance right now--it's a matter of keeping the cortisol down. I would try to use the car this coming week, if I were you,. Give your poor body a break! Remember, you have been piling stress upon stress. If you want to get better, you have to eliminate as many stressors as possible. The job sounds great, BTW!

Yes, what you said makes sense, Kim.

Flooding cortisol has been my nemesis for months now. It's hard

sometimes to identify it though. Sometimes I get diarrhoea, which I

did one day this week, and then it went away. Sometimes I get a

racing heart. Sometimes my sleep is very disturbed in the early

morning. The past couple of days I haven't had many of those

symptoms. But looking at the other things I said -- crying, feeling

low -- those can be symptoms too.

It isn't as easy to rest now as it was. I used to have a quiet day

at home. Now on a work day, certain things have to be done, and on

non-work days there's more pressure to get jobs done like cutting

the grass or cleaning the bathroom. However, I don't intend to do

much of that this weekend.

The cycling is a tricky one. I wasn't able to build up to it like I

would have liked. My thinking was that it will be hard at first, but

get easier as my muscles grow. However, if it gets really hard next

week, I can get the car off Chris. I'll see how I go there.

You're right, all those things that happened to me lately are crazy.

The stress of getting ready for the US trip, PLUS finding and

interviewing for a job, was pretty big. Being in the US was

stressful. The traveling was stressful. I did well at the beginning

of this week but it's entirely possible that it's catching up with

me now.

I started feeling much more calm not long after I wrote my last post

actually. The weekend's coming up, so no preparing meals for

tomorrow. Just a quiet evening with . has been going to

the supermarket so I don't have to deal with that particular stress,

and he's there now.

I still have a tendency to think that when I feel bad, this is the

way it's going to stay. I just hope I can start to get this cortisol

problem sorted. My healing was going well until money/job issues at

the beginning of July, and since then I've been low and numb quite a

lot of the time, hoping I'll feel human again some day.

In fact, truth be told, I'd better get off the computer because I

shouldn't be using it at night. It's just wonderful to see you here

again Kim, and I thank you for your patience and wise words.

.

-- KIM DENISE FINE ARTwww.Kim.comFine Art Giftswww.CafePress.com/Kim

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>

> The cycling is contributing to the cortisol problem. Any exercise

beyond

> gentle walking will do it to you. It isn't a matter of building

up your

> muscles or endurance right now--it's a matter of keeping the

cortisol down.

> I would try to use the car this coming week, if I were you,. Give

your poor

> body a break! Remember, you have been piling stress upon stress.

If you

> want to get better, you have to eliminate as many stressors as

possible.

I know we've been discussing this on the Social W & R list, so I'll

keep this brief. I said there that I'd try the cycling and see. Well

what I might do is see how I'm feeling Sunday night/Monday morning.

If I'm still ropey, then I'll get the car. I'm thinking I'll need

the car several times next week. It means dropping off early

at the child minder's, and having to take the bus to work. I

hate making him do that because it's awkward for him. But if I

deliberately ignore what's going on with me, I will have more days

like yesterday, and that's just no good.

Cortisol is becoming the most hated thing in my life, a barrier to

everything I want to do. It's hard to be patient. I know I should be

thankful for what I am able to do right now. It will settle more and

more as time goes on, right?

.

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,

I will not give you any advice, but share with you my own experience.

I started new job in January this year. It was after a very traumatic

time in a previous work. I am in a wonderful place now, but my start

was very difficult. I felt exhausted, my blood pressure was very

unstable, had headaches, etc. I was unable to do any extra reading,

used to go to sleep about 7pm, getting up 7.30am...My mood was not

great either...Any extra task cost my an enormous amount of energy.

It took my at least 3 months to get used to the envirnoment and

people and to a different public transport.

Today I know I enjoy my work. I feel so much better and I am more

creative, I feel settled...

It takes some time to settle and you know about this...

My way of dealing with situations like this is to give myself what my

body needs (providing I recognise it) and in my case it is extra

sleep...

As I changed jobs in last 4 years at least 5 times I understand how

much does it take from you. And as you I needed others to tell me to

slow down. I know as well that all these negative feelings pass away

with time...

You like your job, don't you? So you are going to use your full

potential when you will adapt to it...I am doing it now- after 10

months...

Best Wishes

ikam

>

> Hi all,

>

> Just hoping for a bit of advice.

>

> I started a new job this past week. It seems to be very well suited

> to what I want/need at the moment. One day off in the week. School

> vacations off. I'm cycling again, working with people, in an

> environment that is familiar, in a different and interesting

context

> from what I was used to in the past.

>

> The first two days went well. I left my three-and-a-half-year-old

> with a child minder and thought about her a few times, but got on

> with what I was doing and pretty much enjoyed it.

>

> Today I feel totally ripped apart by . . . body chemistry? I don't

> know. I don't think a minute has passed when I haven't wanted to

> cry. I cried this morning; I locked myself in the toilets and cried

> at lunchtime; I cried when I cycled over a bump in the sidewalk and

> a pannier fell off my bike; I cried when I collected my daughter

and

> she said how much she misses me in the day. Whenever I thought of

> her today the tears came. It was hard to stop imagining her

bursting

> through the doors and running over to me to give me a big hug.

>

> If I could, I would throw this whole job away. It's just that if I

> want to carry on as I am with diet and supplements, we need the

> money to pay for it, which means me working. Also I thought it was

> just what I needed to give my healing a boost.

>

> I think I need to give things time to settle. It just surprises and

> frightens me, how out of sorts I am right now. At first I was proud

> of all the organising I did, from cooking lunches the evening

> before, to working out where I can cycle on the sidewalk and where

I

> have to go on the road. To be honest the cycling was exhausting

> today, as I'm not used to it anymore.

>

> I'm so low. I feel overwhelmed. In a way I feel like I've lost my

> life. If this is biochemical, might I feel better in a few days if

I

> rest over the weekend?

>

> Thanks,

> .

>

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" Cortisol is becoming the most hated thing in my life, a barrier to

everything I want to do. It's hard to be patient. I know I should be

thankful for what I am able to do right now. "

, change ya thinking, hate is a negative emotion, you will feel

much better if you just accept that that's how it is for now.

Celebrate the stuff you are now able to do, that you couldn't do three

months ago?

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