Defusion ... ( a question)

[Guest guest]

Bil and Randy, ur clarifications were amazing.

I have one question though, while i get it, i think there's some where i am

getting confused...

i will use Philip's example..plz don't mind philip. i am using it in the sense,

using this as my own example

neg. thought: " people think i am dumb "

i am gonna skip the " i am having the thought that people think i am dumb part,

coz frankly i have never said that to my self in real time.

my questions r y to do defusion...

the thought " people think i am dumb is immediately followed by some

neg./unpleasant feelings/sensations/emoitions e.g. anxiety, depression,

hopelessness, sadness etc.

these feelings right away generate some seg. self evaluation and judgements

about myself: i am such a failure in the eyes of everyone, i am an anxious

depressed person who is percieved as being dub...i am lost here????....what is

the neg. self evaluation or judgement i am being fused to here????

also if i distance myself from the initial neg. thought that " people think i am

dumb " ..., that simply this is nothing but a thought, and don't buy into the

content of it...but the whole purose of defusion is to be able to expereince the

unpleasant feelings/emotions/sensations )(anxiety/sadness) as they come, when

they come, without strugglign with em, and expereincing them aS excatly what

they r, unpleasant sensations, without being fused to the self evaluation and

judgement what comes with it, so distancing urself from self evaluationa and

judgement....

howveer if u distance ur self from the thought itself, and simply say " this is

just a thought " then how r u makign room to experenice those unpleasant

sensations of anxiety to begin with? once u ditsance urself fromt he thought

like that, those feelings/sensations will go away too.....but isn't the purpose

of this whole thing all about realizing those " unpleasant sensations "

(anxiety/stress/deression) r not " that bad " to begin with once u start

exprencig them in their totality, coz they r memrely a " normal " way of reeacting

to a " perceived " threatehing situation....

i am so sorry for all the confusion....but i believe i get stuck in these 2

areas sometimes...

1) eg. above , what is the neg. self evluation in that eg.

2) let go of thought content, then automattically unpleasant

sendsations/emotions will go, then how to u expreince them inorder to be able to

realize they r not " harmful " afterall.

thank you

wasalaam