Re: RE: how has our mind evolved to think negatively?

[Guest guest]

I am totally lost in negative thoughts today. One "true" thought after another keeps coming up for me. And then I struggle mightily with trying to diffuse but I always have the hidden agenda of trying to change the feeling. At least I believe I want to get a little distance from the upsetting thought so it won't be quite so upsetting and I won't feel so bad. I think Russ talks a lot about the negative mind in the Happiness Trap. I have always had the tendency to look out for problems and that by itself isn't so bad. What's bad for me is the fusion with a thought and then the crushing anxiety or depression that follows from it. But it's not always that way for me. Sometimes there is just emotion without words and that's always negative for me these days, too.Bruce Hi russell:-)thanks for the links, but bro u had me upto "the test requires an.." , totally lost me after that...I can't comprehend information when it is explained like that, but i DO APPRECIATE u sending me the links, thanks :-)I am looking for an answer like the kind Russ gave when he said our thoughts don't necessarily influence our feelings e.g. . if u suddenly c a snake, the information would reach your amygdala and trigger a flight-or-fight response in u even b4 ur celebral cortex could generate a thought about it. SO I GOT IT!our mind has been evolved to think negatively. why? how?-K Designs."" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectualTo: ACT_for_the_Public From: bauer.russell@...Date: Tue, 6 Dec 2011 13:08:02 -0700Subject: Re: how has our mind evolved to think negatively? Sorry I meant explanation not exclamation! Look at this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Type_I_and_type_II_errors Type I error - crying wolf when there is not wolf is not at bad as type II error - failing to see the wolf when it is there. But, we evolved to have positive emotions too. Here is, I think, an excellent exclamation why we did http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broaden-and-build Cheers! salaamz:-)i know that our mind naturally generates both positive and neg. thoughts. And from Joaanne Dahls podcast, she mentioned something like our mind generates 5 times more neg. thoughts than positive. Hence challanging a thought, replacing it with a more rational or logical thought, don't work in the long run. Russ in his podcast also mentioned that our feelings inflence our thoughts but don't necessarily create it as our feelings r under multiple sources of stimuli at any one time. Dr. also mentioned our minds have been evolved to think negatively, i would like to know how? if possible, in Russ 's style, as, if the explanation getz too didactic (too scientific) u might lose me. Beating ourselves up over neg. thoughts that pop up, or evaluating our expreinces,or judgeing ourselves based on the thought, or looking for evidence to prove a neg. thought wrong, and replacing it with a more positve one, ALL these , in my perspective, take us away from acceptance of our private expreinces as they r, and cultivating that 'self-compassion' that is so needed when experecining painful thoughts and feelings. A better understanding of how our mind functions would help us try to understand ourselves better. Hence i would like to know. jazakallah khair (thank you:-)wasalaam:-)"" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectual

[Guest guest]

Hi Bruce - Thought you might like this. I love Pema Chodron....

GET CURIOUSRather than going after our walls and barriers with a sledgehammer, we pay attention to them. With gentleness and honesty, we move closer to those walls. We touch them and smell them and get to know them well. We begin a process of acknowledging our aversions and our cravings. We become familiar with the strategies and beliefs we use to build the walls: What are the stories I tell myself? What repels me and what attracts me? We start to get curious about what’s going on.(From The Places That Scare You)

To: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Wednesday, 7 December 2011, 20:38Subject: Re: RE: how has our mind evolved to think negatively?

I am totally lost in negative thoughts today. One "true" thought after another keeps coming up for me. And then I struggle mightily with trying to diffuse but I always have the hidden agenda of trying to change the feeling. At least I believe I want to get a little distance from the upsetting thought so it won't be quite so upsetting and I won't feel so bad.

I think Russ talks a lot about the negative mind in the Happiness Trap. I have always had the tendency to look out for problems and that by itself isn't so bad. What's bad for me is the fusion with a thought and then the crushing anxiety or depression that follows from it. But it's not always that way for me. Sometimes there is just emotion without words and that's always negative for me these days, too.

Bruce

Hi russell:-)thanks for the links, but bro u had me upto "the test requires an.." , totally lost me after that...I can't comprehend information when it is explained like that, but i DO APPRECIATE u sending me the links, thanks :-)I am looking for an answer like the kind Russ gave when he said our thoughts don't necessarily influence our feelings e.g. . if u suddenly c a snake, the information would reach your amygdala and trigger a flight-or-fight response in u even b4 ur celebral cortex could generate a thought about it. SO I GOT IT!our mind has been evolved to think negatively. why? how?-K Designs.

"" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectual

To: ACT_for_the_Public From: bauer.russell@...Date: Tue, 6 Dec 2011 13:08:02 -0700Subject: Re: how has our mind evolved to think negatively?

Sorry I meant explanation not exclamation!

Look at this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Type_I_and_type_II_errorsType I error - crying wolf when there is not wolf is not at bad as type II error - failing to see the wolf when it is there.But, we evolved to have positive emotions too. Here is, I think, an excellent exclamation why we did http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broaden-and-buildCheers!

salaamz:-)i know that our mind naturally generates both positive and neg. thoughts. And from Joaanne Dahls podcast, she mentioned something like our mind generates 5 times more neg. thoughts than positive. Hence challanging a thought, replacing it with a more rational or logical thought, don't work in the long run. Russ in his podcast also mentioned that our feelings inflence our thoughts but don't necessarily create it as our feelings r under multiple sources of stimuli at any one time. Dr. also mentioned our minds have been evolved to think negatively, i would like to know how? if possible, in Russ 's style, as, if the explanation getz too didactic (too scientific) u might lose me. Beating ourselves up over neg. thoughts that pop up, or evaluating our expreinces,or judgeing ourselves based on the thought, or looking for evidence to prove a neg. thought wrong, and

replacing it with a more positve one, ALL these , in my perspective, take us away from acceptance of our private expreinces as they r, and cultivating that 'self-compassion' that is so needed when experecining painful thoughts and feelings. A better understanding of how our mind functions would help us try to understand ourselves better. Hence i would like to know. jazakallah khair (thank you:-)wasalaam:-)

"" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectual

[Guest guest]

Second that!D

I love Pema Chodron....

[Guest guest]

And are you being judgmental about your possibly negative thinking...? I love words....When asked for romantic advice once, I told the person she didn't seem to be in love with the object of the discussion, but rather with some idealized image of him. I am fascinated by my own filtered reality and the complex relationships I have with the people-models I have created.

D

 

and then we go out, where no one means anything except an intermittent interaction, like with the therapist.  doesnt matter what he says really...fuck I hate him and I love him....I wish I could decide...for now hating is easy but tomorrow I'll feel sorrow because I love him. I wish I could make up my mind....

 I wish I was out of therapy...not for my therapist but for me...I'm tormented by the need for him but I so want to go it alone..... Lost/lonely Lou today.  

 Is this negative thinking? :-P

To: " ACT_for_the_Public " <ACT_for_the_Public >

Sent: Thursday, 8 December 2011 7:23 PM Subject: Re: RE: how has our mind evolved to think negatively?

 

 

Hi Bruce -  Thought you might like this. I love Pema Chodron....

 

GET CURIOUSRather than going after our walls and barriers with a sledgehammer, we pay attention to them. With gentleness and honesty, we move closer to those walls. We touch them and smell them and get to know them well. We begin a process of acknowledging our aversions and our cravings. We become familiar with the strategies and beliefs we use to build the walls: What are the stories I tell myself? What repels me and what attracts me? We start to get curious about what’s going on.

(From The Places That Scare You)

To: ACT_for_the_Public

Sent: Wednesday, 7 December 2011, 20:38Subject: Re: RE: how has our mind evolved to think negatively?

 

I am totally lost in negative thoughts today. One " true " thought after another keeps coming up for me. And then I struggle mightily with trying to diffuse but I always have the hidden agenda of trying to change the feeling. At least I believe I want to get a little distance from the upsetting thought so it won't be quite so upsetting and I won't feel so bad. 

I think Russ talks a lot about the negative mind in the Happiness Trap. I have always had the tendency to look out for problems and that by itself isn't so bad. What's bad for me is the fusion with a thought and then the crushing anxiety or depression that follows from it. But it's not always that way for me. Sometimes there is just emotion without words and that's always negative for me these days, too.

Bruce

 

Hi russell:-)thanks for the links, but bro u had me upto " the test requires an.. " , totally lost me after that...I can't comprehend information when it is explained like that, but i DO APPRECIATE u sending me the links, thanks :-)

I am looking for an answer like the kind Russ gave when he said our thoughts don't necessarily influence our feelings e.g. . if u  suddenly c a snake, the information would reach your amygdala and trigger a flight-or-fight response in u  even b4 ur celebral cortex could generate a thought about it.

SO I GOT IT!our mind has been evolved to think negatively. why? how?-K Designs.

" " Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.

That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes. "  ~ a very pious intellectual

To: ACT_for_the_Public From: bauer.russell@...

Date: Tue, 6 Dec 2011 13:08:02 -0700Subject: Re: how has our mind evolved to think negatively? 

Sorry I meant explanation not exclamation!

Look at this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Type_I_and_type_II_errors

Type I error - crying wolf when there is not wolf is not at bad as type II error - failing to see the wolf when it is there.But, we evolved to have positive emotions too.  Here is, I think, an excellent exclamation why we did

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broaden-and-buildCheers!

 

salaamz:-)i know that our mind naturally generates both positive and neg. thoughts. And from Joaanne Dahls podcast, she mentioned something like our mind generates 5 times more neg. thoughts than positive. Hence challanging a thought, replacing it with a more rational or logical thought, don't work in the long run.

Russ in his podcast also mentioned that our feelings inflence our thoughts but don't necessarily create it as  our feelings r under multiple sources of stimuli at any one time. Dr. also mentioned our minds have been evolved to think negatively, i would like to know how? if possible, in Russ 's  style, as, if the explanation getz too didactic (too scientific) u might lose me.

Beating ourselves up over neg. thoughts that pop up, or evaluating our expreinces,or  judgeing ourselves  based on the thought, or looking for evidence to prove a neg. thought wrong, and

replacing it with a more positve one, ALL these , in my perspective, take us away from acceptance of our private expreinces as they r, and cultivating that 'self-compassion' that is so needed when experecining painful thoughts and feelings.

A better understanding of how our mind functions would help us try to understand ourselves better. Hence i would like to know. jazakallah khair (thank you:-)wasalaam:-)

" " Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.

That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes. "  ~ a very pious intellectual

[Guest guest]

I think it is. Hang in there, Lou. I think it's normal to not want to be dependent on someone else, especially a therapist.Bruce and then we go out, where no one means anything except an intermittent interaction, like with the therapist. doesnt matter what he says really...fuck I hate him and I love him....I wish I could decide...for now hating is easy but tomorrow I'll feel sorrow because I love him. I wish I could make up my mind.... I wish I was out of therapy...not for my therapist but for me...I'm tormented by the need for him but I so want to go it alone..... Lost/lonely Lou today. Is this negative thinking? :-P To: "ACT_for_the_Public " <ACT_for_the_Public > Sent: Thursday, 8 December 2011 7:23 PM Subject: Re: RE: how has our mind evolved to think negatively? Hi Bruce - Thought you might like this. I love Pema Chodron.... GET CURIOUSRather than going after our walls and barriers with a sledgehammer, we pay attention to them. With gentleness and honesty, we move closer to those walls. We touch them and smell them and get to know them well. We begin a process of acknowledging our aversions and our cravings. We become familiar with the strategies and beliefs we use to build the walls: What are the stories I tell myself? What repels me and what attracts me? We start to get curious about what’s going on.(From The Places That Scare You) To: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Wednesday, 7 December 2011, 20:38Subject: Re: RE: how has our mind evolved to think negatively? I am totally lost in negative thoughts today. One "true" thought after another keeps coming up for me. And then I struggle mightily with trying to diffuse but I always have the hidden agenda of trying to change the feeling. At least I believe I want to get a little distance from the upsetting thought so it won't be quite so upsetting and I won't feel so bad. I think Russ talks a lot about the negative mind in the Happiness Trap. I have always had the tendency to look out for problems and that by itself isn't so bad. What's bad for me is the fusion with a thought and then the crushing anxiety or depression that follows from it. But it's not always that way for me. Sometimes there is just emotion without words and that's always negative for me these days, too. Bruce Hi russell:-)thanks for the links, but bro u had me upto "the test requires an.." , totally lost me after that...I can't comprehend information when it is explained like that, but i DO APPRECIATE u sending me the links, thanks :-)I am looking for an answer like the kind Russ gave when he said our thoughts don't necessarily influence our feelings e.g. . if u suddenly c a snake, the information would reach your amygdala and trigger a flight-or-fight response in u even b4 ur celebral cortex could generate a thought about it. SO I GOT IT!our mind has been evolved to think negatively. why? how?-K Designs. "" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectual To: ACT_for_the_Public From: bauer.russell@...Date: Tue, 6 Dec 2011 13:08:02 -0700Subject: Re: how has our mind evolved to think negatively? Sorry I meant explanation not exclamation! Look at this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Type_I_and_type_II_errorsType I error - crying wolf when there is not wolf is not at bad as type II error - failing to see the wolf when it is there.But, we evolved to have positive emotions too. Here is, I think, an excellent exclamation why we did http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broaden-and-buildCheers! salaamz:-)i know that our mind naturally generates both positive and neg. thoughts. And from Joaanne Dahls podcast, she mentioned something like our mind generates 5 times more neg. thoughts than positive. Hence challanging a thought, replacing it with a more rational or logical thought, don't work in the long run. Russ in his podcast also mentioned that our feelings inflence our thoughts but don't necessarily create it as our feelings r under multiple sources of stimuli at any one time. Dr. also mentioned our minds have been evolved to think negatively, i would like to know how? if possible, in Russ 's style, as, if the explanation getz too didactic (too scientific) u might lose me. Beating ourselves up over neg. thoughts that pop up, or evaluating our expreinces,or judgeing ourselves based on the thought, or looking for evidence to prove a neg. thought wrong, and replacing it with a more positve one, ALL these , in my perspective, take us away from acceptance of our private expreinces as they r, and cultivating that 'self-compassion' that is so needed when experecining painful thoughts and feelings. A better understanding of how our mind functions would help us try to understand ourselves better. Hence i would like to know. jazakallah khair (thank you:-)wasalaam:-) "" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectual

[Guest guest]

Thanks for this Simone. I admit that going after my walls with a sledgehammer sounds very appealing. I've been dealing with the stories a lot this morning and not in a gentle way. I have got some movement around them, though. I have a lot of edgy anxiety and energy and it's very uncomfortable, especially when you're bed-bound.I like Pema Chrodron, too. Sometimes I wish I could get her meaning better than I do. She seems to speak to the pain that we all feel and offer an answer. Hi Bruce - Thought you might like this. I love Pema Chodron.... GET CURIOUSRather than going after our walls and barriers with a sledgehammer, we pay attention to them. With gentleness and honesty, we move closer to those walls. We touch them and smell them and get to know them well. We begin a process of acknowledging our aversions and our cravings. We become familiar with the strategies and beliefs we use to build the walls: What are the stories I tell myself? What repels me and what attracts me? We start to get curious about what’s going on.(From The Places That Scare You) To: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Wednesday, 7 December 2011, 20:38Subject: Re: RE: how has our mind evolved to think negatively? I am totally lost in negative thoughts today. One "true" thought after another keeps coming up for me. And then I struggle mightily with trying to diffuse but I always have the hidden agenda of trying to change the feeling. At least I believe I want to get a little distance from the upsetting thought so it won't be quite so upsetting and I won't feel so bad. I think Russ talks a lot about the negative mind in the Happiness Trap. I have always had the tendency to look out for problems and that by itself isn't so bad. What's bad for me is the fusion with a thought and then the crushing anxiety or depression that follows from it. But it's not always that way for me. Sometimes there is just emotion without words and that's always negative for me these days, too. Bruce Hi russell:-)thanks for the links, but bro u had me upto "the test requires an.." , totally lost me after that...I can't comprehend information when it is explained like that, but i DO APPRECIATE u sending me the links, thanks :-)I am looking for an answer like the kind Russ gave when he said our thoughts don't necessarily influence our feelings e.g. . if u suddenly c a snake, the information would reach your amygdala and trigger a flight-or-fight response in u even b4 ur celebral cortex could generate a thought about it. SO I GOT IT!our mind has been evolved to think negatively. why? how?-K Designs. "" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectual To: ACT_for_the_Public From: bauer.russell@...Date: Tue, 6 Dec 2011 13:08:02 -0700Subject: Re: how has our mind evolved to think negatively? Sorry I meant explanation not exclamation! Look at this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Type_I_and_type_II_errorsType I error - crying wolf when there is not wolf is not at bad as type II error - failing to see the wolf when it is there.But, we evolved to have positive emotions too. Here is, I think, an excellent exclamation why we did http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broaden-and-buildCheers! salaamz:-)i know that our mind naturally generates both positive and neg. thoughts. And from Joaanne Dahls podcast, she mentioned something like our mind generates 5 times more neg. thoughts than positive. Hence challanging a thought, replacing it with a more rational or logical thought, don't work in the long run. Russ in his podcast also mentioned that our feelings inflence our thoughts but don't necessarily create it as our feelings r under multiple sources of stimuli at any one time. Dr. also mentioned our minds have been evolved to think negatively, i would like to know how? if possible, in Russ 's style, as, if the explanation getz too didactic (too scientific) u might lose me. Beating ourselves up over neg. thoughts that pop up, or evaluating our expreinces,or judgeing ourselves based on the thought, or looking for evidence to prove a neg. thought wrong, and replacing it with a more positve one, ALL these , in my perspective, take us away from acceptance of our private expreinces as they r, and cultivating that 'self-compassion' that is so needed when experecining painful thoughts and feelings. A better understanding of how our mind functions would help us try to understand ourselves better. Hence i would like to know. jazakallah khair (thank you:-)wasalaam:-) "" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectual

[Guest guest]

Bruce - why don't you listen to some of her podcasts - I think there are some on you tube - and if you google her I'm sure you'll find more. Better than laying there stewing!

Simone

To: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Thursday, 8 December 2011, 20:05Subject: Re: RE: how has our mind evolved to think negatively?

Thanks for this Simone. I admit that going after my walls with a sledgehammer sounds very appealing. I've been dealing with the stories a lot this morning and not in a gentle way. I have got some movement around them, though. I have a lot of edgy anxiety and energy and it's very uncomfortable, especially when you're bed-bound.

I like Pema Chrodron, too. Sometimes I wish I could get her meaning better than I do. She seems to speak to the pain that we all feel and offer an answer.

Hi Bruce - Thought you might like this. I love Pema Chodron....

GET CURIOUSRather than going after our walls and barriers with a sledgehammer, we pay attention to them. With gentleness and honesty, we move closer to those walls. We touch them and smell them and get to know them well. We begin a process of acknowledging our aversions and our cravings. We become familiar with the strategies and beliefs we use to build the walls: What are the stories I tell myself? What repels me and what attracts me? We start to get curious about what’s going on.(From The Places That Scare You)

To: ACT_for_the_Public Sent: Wednesday, 7 December 2011, 20:38Subject: Re: RE: how has our mind evolved to think negatively?

I am totally lost in negative thoughts today. One "true" thought after another keeps coming up for me. And then I struggle mightily with trying to diffuse but I always have the hidden agenda of trying to change the feeling. At least I believe I want to get a little distance from the upsetting thought so it won't be quite so upsetting and I won't feel so bad.

I think Russ talks a lot about the negative mind in the Happiness Trap. I have always had the tendency to look out for problems and that by itself isn't so bad. What's bad for me is the fusion with a thought and then the crushing anxiety or depression that follows from it. But it's not always that way for me. Sometimes there is just emotion without words and that's always negative for me these days, too.

Bruce

Hi russell:-)thanks for the links, but bro u had me upto "the test requires an.." , totally lost me after that...I can't comprehend information when it is explained like that, but i DO APPRECIATE u sending me the links, thanks :-)I am looking for an answer like the kind Russ gave when he said our thoughts don't necessarily influence our feelings e.g. . if u suddenly c a snake, the information would reach your amygdala and trigger a flight-or-fight response in u even b4 ur celebral cortex could generate a thought about it. SO I GOT IT!our mind has been evolved to think negatively. why? how?-K Designs.

"" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectual

To: ACT_for_the_Public From: bauer.russell@...Date: Tue, 6 Dec 2011 13:08:02 -0700Subject: Re: how has our mind evolved to think negatively?

Sorry I meant explanation not exclamation!

Look at this http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Type_I_and_type_II_errorsType I error - crying wolf when there is not wolf is not at bad as type II error - failing to see the wolf when it is there.But, we evolved to have positive emotions too. Here is, I think, an excellent exclamation why we did http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Broaden-and-buildCheers!

salaamz:-)i know that our mind naturally generates both positive and neg. thoughts. And from Joaanne Dahls podcast, she mentioned something like our mind generates 5 times more neg. thoughts than positive. Hence challanging a thought, replacing it with a more rational or logical thought, don't work in the long run. Russ in his podcast also mentioned that our feelings inflence our thoughts but don't necessarily create it as our feelings r under multiple sources of stimuli at any one time. Dr. also mentioned our minds have been evolved to think negatively, i would like to know how? if possible, in Russ 's style, as, if the explanation getz too didactic (too scientific) u might lose me. Beating ourselves up over neg. thoughts that pop up, or evaluating our expreinces,or judgeing ourselves based on the thought, or looking for evidence to prove a neg. thought wrong, and

replacing it with a more positve one, ALL these , in my perspective, take us away from acceptance of our private expreinces as they r, and cultivating that 'self-compassion' that is so needed when experecining painful thoughts and feelings. A better understanding of how our mind functions would help us try to understand ourselves better. Hence i would like to know. jazakallah khair (thank you:-)wasalaam:-)

"" Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're already a mile away AND you have their shoes." ~ a very pious intellectual