Guest guest Posted January 30, 2008 Report Share Posted January 30, 2008 L, Mmmmm...Excel. Yup, that sounds like something I would do. Limiting myself to 40 hours a week of work would be nice. While I may be in the office 40 hours a week, I spend my off time thinking and planning for work. I do tell myself that it's for my job, but I do get obsessive about thinking about work related things when I should be focusing on my home life. I was given something last Friday afternoon (at 4 p.m.) that should have required far more brain power than I was actually capable of at 4 p.m. on a Friday, but I took it on with my typical " I'll get it done " attitude. By 4:55 p.m., I had a complete and utter meltdown. There was no way that the problems were going to get fixed by me in that one hour period and it really shouldn't have been my problem to deal with in the first place, the attorney just wanted to go home, so she passed it off to me to be the fixer. She had already made a mess of it, it was incorrect and the numbers didn't balance (largely because she had not used excel - hah!). I thought about it all weekend long. I came into the office on Monday morning with it worked out in my head, put it on paper and it did end up being correct and complete by the Monday at 10:00 a.m. deadline, but it certainly wasn't going to happen with the amount of time originally allotted. I also beat myself up about it all weekend long for not being able to complete it in that hour AND NOT TAKING THE WORK AWAY FROM MY BOSS BEFORE SHE GOOFED IT UP. Like I have a real say in what she does with her files. I really shouldn't care. I should not have taken my weekend worrying about it and instead should have spent some real quality time with my grandson, who at 10 mos. old is really getting interesting and into everything. But, my mind really was elsewhere all weekend. I think workaholic might be an understatement for me. But, you know what they say, you gotta start somewhere. Seems like a good starting point for me. Khris Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 30, 2008 Report Share Posted January 30, 2008 Kelley, My psychiatrist has been trying to get me to work on mindfulness meditation, but it's not sinking in for me yet. I have a hard time sitting still and not thinking about anything else except what I'm suppose to focus and/or not focus on. I'm still too anxious. I get stressed out planning to meditate! I think I still need some work on the anxiety issue too along with my workaholicness and perfectionistic tendencies. I can see it being a daily battle for me too. If you can do it, my hat's off to you. The first lesson (meditation) in the mindfulness meditation book I have was to sit for 30 minutes staring at 3 raisins as though I had never seen or eaten a raisin before. I got so frusterated with the book that I took the book into my appointment with my doc. He thought that 30 minutes was probably a real stretch, especially for me, but tried to encourage me for a 5 minute stint. I haven't picked the book up since. The first four or five chapters did nothing but tell me how good this book and technique was going to be for me, and I feel like I failed at being able to complete the first exercize. I might pick it back up one day, but right now, I'm just not all that excited about meditating over raisins. LOL. Khris > >> > Folks:> > > > Occassionally, someone on this board talks about finding your " true > > self " and my psychiatrist has also mentioned it, but I really just > > don't know what it means. It could be that I am still so new at the > > self improvement thing or that I am too encompassed by fleas. Can > > anyone explain this to me in a way that I might understand it? Alone > > as a statement just leaves me blank. > > > > Khris> >> > > > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 30, 2008 Report Share Posted January 30, 2008 Hey,Khris...My apologies for sort of intruding on the thread you started.I'm sitting here writing my response,send it,come back and see that you guys are discussing the subject on quite a different level from the stuff I was talking about! Sorry! Maybe meditation just isn't you? Or maybe you need to be active while practicing some kind of mindfulness,instead of being still? Have you ever taken the Myers-Briggs Psychological Types test? I think there are something like twelve types,each with their own style of functioning (they're all relative: no style is better or worse than another).Some types are very driven and practical and want to keep busy,while others are very " out there " ,head in the clouds types.Everyone is different and what speaks directly to one type might be mostly meaningless to another. I've found the Myers-Briggs to be very useful as an aid of self acceptance because it confirmed my suspicions about what actually makes me tick,as well as what my strengths are.Here is a link to a briefer form of the test that seems to be as accurate as the longer one I took-I got the same results-in case you are interested ( below your test results,there are links that take you to a profile description): http://www.kisa.ca/personality/ > > Kelley, > > My psychiatrist has been trying to get me to work on mindfulness > meditation, but it's not sinking in for me yet. I have a hard time > sitting still and not thinking about anything else except what I'm > suppose to focus and/or not focus on. I'm still too anxious. I get > stressed out planning to meditate! > > I think I still need some work on the anxiety issue too along with my > workaholicness and perfectionistic tendencies. I can see it being a > daily battle for me too. If you can do it, my hat's off to you. The > first lesson (meditation) in the mindfulness meditation book I have > was to sit for 30 minutes staring at 3 raisins as though I had never > seen or eaten a raisin before. I got so frusterated with the book > that I took the book into my appointment with my doc. He thought > that 30 minutes was probably a real stretch, especially for me, but > tried to encourage me for a 5 minute stint. I haven't picked the > book up since. The first four or five chapters did nothing but tell > me how good this book and technique was going to be for me, and I > feel like I failed at being able to complete the first exercize. I > might pick it back up one day, but right now, I'm just not all that > excited about meditating over raisins. LOL. > > Khris > > > _________________________________________________________________ > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 30, 2008 Report Share Posted January 30, 2008 : Ha ha. I think we're posting to each other at the same time. Thanks for the link, I'll check it out. I did do personality testing for my job. I'm a very go getter, in control type of person. Someone who pretty much has to work independantly. No over my shoulder. That would drive me totally crazy. But again, whether or not that's a true self or my false self, I donno. Khris Khris > > > > Kelley, > > > > My psychiatrist has been trying to get me to work on mindfulness > > meditation, but it's not sinking in for me yet. I have a hard time > > sitting still and not thinking about anything else except what I'm > > suppose to focus and/or not focus on. I'm still too anxious. I > get > > stressed out planning to meditate! > > > > I think I still need some work on the anxiety issue too along with > my > > workaholicness and perfectionistic tendencies. I can see it being > a > > daily battle for me too. If you can do it, my hat's off to you. > The > > first lesson (meditation) in the mindfulness meditation book I have > > was to sit for 30 minutes staring at 3 raisins as though I had > never > > seen or eaten a raisin before. I got so frusterated with the book > > that I took the book into my appointment with my doc. He thought > > that 30 minutes was probably a real stretch, especially for me, but > > tried to encourage me for a 5 minute stint. I haven't picked the > > book up since. The first four or five chapters did nothing but > tell > > me how good this book and technique was going to be for me, and I > > feel like I failed at being able to complete the first exercize. I > > might pick it back up one day, but right now, I'm just not all that > > excited about meditating over raisins. LOL. > > > > Khris > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 30, 2008 Report Share Posted January 30, 2008 Personality test: I am ISTJ. The results. Introverted (I) 82% Extraverted (E) 18% Sensing (S) 68% Intuitive (N) 32% Thinking (T) 70% Feeling (F) 30% Judging (J) 91% Perceiving (P) 9% " People of this type tend to be: cautious, conservative, and quiet; literal, realistic, and practical; careful and precise; logical, honest, and matter of fact; resistant to change and comfortable with routine; hard working and responsible " That's essentially me in a nutshell and very close to what my office personality profile says. Only my office one says I like to be in " charge " , but actually, I just really want to be left alone. According to this personality profile, one good career path for a person like me...a paralegal. That's what I do for a living. Huh, who'd a thunk it? Thanks, that was fun. Khris > > > > Kelley, > > > > My psychiatrist has been trying to get me to work on mindfulness > > meditation, but it's not sinking in for me yet. I have a hard time > > sitting still and not thinking about anything else except what I'm > > suppose to focus and/or not focus on. I'm still too anxious. I > get > > stressed out planning to meditate! > > > > I think I still need some work on the anxiety issue too along with > my > > workaholicness and perfectionistic tendencies. I can see it being > a > > daily battle for me too. If you can do it, my hat's off to you. > The > > first lesson (meditation) in the mindfulness meditation book I have > > was to sit for 30 minutes staring at 3 raisins as though I had > never > > seen or eaten a raisin before. I got so frusterated with the book > > that I took the book into my appointment with my doc. He thought > > that 30 minutes was probably a real stretch, especially for me, but > > tried to encourage me for a 5 minute stint. I haven't picked the > > book up since. The first four or five chapters did nothing but > tell > > me how good this book and technique was going to be for me, and I > > feel like I failed at being able to complete the first exercize. I > > might pick it back up one day, but right now, I'm just not all that > > excited about meditating over raisins. LOL. > > > > Khris > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 30, 2008 Report Share Posted January 30, 2008 When I first took the Meyers-Briggs in college, I came out ESFJ. Then, a couple years later, I took it again at work, now I'm ISFJ. I took it again just now, and I'm still ISFJ. My personality changed! > > > > > > Kelley, > > > > > > My psychiatrist has been trying to get me to work on mindfulness > > > meditation, but it's not sinking in for me yet. I have a hard > time > > > sitting still and not thinking about anything else except what > I'm > > > suppose to focus and/or not focus on. I'm still too anxious. I > > get > > > stressed out planning to meditate! > > > > > > I think I still need some work on the anxiety issue too along > with > > my > > > workaholicness and perfectionistic tendencies. I can see it > being > > a > > > daily battle for me too. If you can do it, my hat's off to you. > > The > > > first lesson (meditation) in the mindfulness meditation book I > have > > > was to sit for 30 minutes staring at 3 raisins as though I had > > never > > > seen or eaten a raisin before. I got so frusterated with the > book > > > that I took the book into my appointment with my doc. He thought > > > that 30 minutes was probably a real stretch, especially for me, > but > > > tried to encourage me for a 5 minute stint. I haven't picked the > > > book up since. The first four or five chapters did nothing but > > tell > > > me how good this book and technique was going to be for me, and I > > > feel like I failed at being able to complete the first exercize. > I > > > might pick it back up one day, but right now, I'm just not all > that > > > excited about meditating over raisins. LOL. > > > > > > Khris > > > > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 im ENFJ. its crazy it so accurately describes me. Hmmm... wonder where this comes from! ENFJs know and appreciate people. Like most NFs, (and Feelers in general), they are apt to neglect themselves and their own needs for the needs of others. They have thinner psychological boundaries than most, and are at risk for being hurt or even abused by less sensitive people. ENFJs often take on more of the burdens of others than they can bear. > > > > > > > > Kelley, > > > > > > > > My psychiatrist has been trying to get me to work on > mindfulness > > > > meditation, but it's not sinking in for me yet. I have a hard > > time > > > > sitting still and not thinking about anything else except what > > I'm > > > > suppose to focus and/or not focus on. I'm still too anxious. > I > > > get > > > > stressed out planning to meditate! > > > > > > > > I think I still need some work on the anxiety issue too along > > with > > > my > > > > workaholicness and perfectionistic tendencies. I can see it > > being > > > a > > > > daily battle for me too. If you can do it, my hat's off to > you. > > > The > > > > first lesson (meditation) in the mindfulness meditation book I > > have > > > > was to sit for 30 minutes staring at 3 raisins as though I had > > > never > > > > seen or eaten a raisin before. I got so frusterated with the > > book > > > > that I took the book into my appointment with my doc. He > thought > > > > that 30 minutes was probably a real stretch, especially for me, > > but > > > > tried to encourage me for a 5 minute stint. I haven't picked > the > > > > book up since. The first four or five chapters did nothing but > > > tell > > > > me how good this book and technique was going to be for me, and > I > > > > feel like I failed at being able to complete the first > exercize. > > I > > > > might pick it back up one day, but right now, I'm just not all > > that > > > > excited about meditating over raisins. LOL. > > > > > > > > Khris > > > > > > > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 , I'm sorry to read about your ballet experience. It reminded me of how I always thought I was a glutton and a klutz based on nada's assessment. Turns out, I was eating the wrong things unwittingly because that's what I was raised on (sugar, white flour, etc.). I never learned about good nutrition until I read the South Beach diet book that my mother-in-law gave me and subsequently lost 60 pounds. Also, no one ever encouraged me to exercise. My balance improved when I started yoga, so goodbye klutz. Kris, something you wrote really struck me. It's so honest and devastating, and unfortunately, so true for many of us KOs: " I feel like an unwitting accomplice in the destruction of myself...whomever that is. " Some of you mentioned how you entered a career based on your false self. I started as an assistant editor at 23 and was promoted to associate and managing editor within 2 years. When pruning out the things I didn't like about myself, I realized that my entire career was based on correcting others! Talk about a perfectionist job! I'm in research now, but I don't truly enjoy that either. But like others mentioned, I have a mortgage and bills, so I can't up and leave. My personality test changed from INTJ in college to INTP recently. I wonder if it will change further now that I am so much more in touch with my true self. I feel that the true self is always there, all the time, just like our souls. We just need to find it. > > > > > > > > > > Kelley, > > > > > > > > > > My psychiatrist has been trying to get me to work on > > mindfulness > > > > > meditation, but it's not sinking in for me yet. I have a > hard > > > time > > > > > sitting still and not thinking about anything else except > what > > > I'm > > > > > suppose to focus and/or not focus on. I'm still too > anxious. > > I > > > > get > > > > > stressed out planning to meditate! > > > > > > > > > > I think I still need some work on the anxiety issue too along > > > with > > > > my > > > > > workaholicness and perfectionistic tendencies. I can see it > > > being > > > > a > > > > > daily battle for me too. If you can do it, my hat's off to > > you. > > > > The > > > > > first lesson (meditation) in the mindfulness meditation book > I > > > have > > > > > was to sit for 30 minutes staring at 3 raisins as though I > had > > > > never > > > > > seen or eaten a raisin before. I got so frusterated with the > > > book > > > > > that I took the book into my appointment with my doc. He > > thought > > > > > that 30 minutes was probably a real stretch, especially for > me, > > > but > > > > > tried to encourage me for a 5 minute stint. I haven't picked > > the > > > > > book up since. The first four or five chapters did nothing > but > > > > tell > > > > > me how good this book and technique was going to be for me, > and > > I > > > > > feel like I failed at being able to complete the first > > exercize. > > > I > > > > > might pick it back up one day, but right now, I'm just not > all > > > that > > > > > excited about meditating over raisins. LOL. > > > > > > > > > > Khris > > > > > > > > > > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > > > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 > > Ok this is definitely a pattern. I am INTJ, consistently all my life. INTJs are about 1% of the population, and 2/3 are male. Have t we identified at least three female INTJs so far? <snip> > > Anyone else? > > Beverley > Yep. Spooky, huh? Although on the Meyers-Briggs I was right down the middle on I/E for the first one. The interviewer asked me questions that were aimed at figuring out which way I leaned, I or E. In the end, we both felt that I go with either situation. I think when I'm depressed, which after this whole NC situation came about didn't get any easier, I lean more toward I but that is probably to try to stay away from the world somewhat. Tired of being hurt, one tends to retreat which isn't always the wisest idea at least for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 The theory of distinction between introvert and extrovert has to do with the energy involved with being around others. Extroverts get charged up around others, eg at parties, introverts need quiet time and space to recharge their batteries. People in the middle of any of the four continuums may swing back and forth depending on circumstances, but usually the preferences are set for life, as I understand it. I am an extreme introvert although I can behave in extrovert situations when I need to, I am exhausted for a long time after. I belong to an INTJ group and have sent out a query re research on nature/nurture influences on personality. Beverley nashbabe7 wrote: > > Ok this is definitely a pattern. I am INTJ, consistently all my life. INTJs are about 1% of the population, and 2/3 are male. Have t we identified at least three female INTJs so far? <snip> > > Anyone else? > > Beverley > Yep. Spooky, huh? Although on the Meyers-Briggs I was right down the middle on I/E for the first one. The interviewer asked me questions that were aimed at figuring out which way I leaned, I or E. In the end, we both felt that I go with either situation. I think when I'm depressed, which after this whole NC situation came about didn't get any easier, I lean more toward I but that is probably to try to stay away from the world somewhat. Tired of being hurt, one tends to retreat which isn't always the wisest idea at least for me. --------------------------------- Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Hi! I am INTJ female too...think you're onto something! > > > > Ok this is definitely a pattern. I am INTJ, consistently all my life. > INTJs are about 1% of the population, and 2/3 are male. Have t we > identified at least three female INTJs so far? That would mean this > board is about 300 people( most of whom are silent hence still an > unusual event), or MAYBE it is a clue to KOs and being raised by BPD. > Needing order and being flexible and imagination to deal with changing > realities? I worked at policy and program evaluation all my working > life and felt it was home. Designing and redesigning programs and > policies to make things work better, AND implementing them, two > functions that usually do not go together. > > > > Anyone else? > > > > Beverley > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Beverly, I'm sure if I ask him, my Doc would say that my ISTJ (Introvert, Sensor, Thinker, Judger) is my false self. I think I would likely disagree with him primarily on the introverted side, because I think I am truly an introvert. Like you, when in a situation that requires me to mingle in large groups, I am exhausted and it takes me a lot of down time alone to recover. My HB plays guitar, is in a band and frequently plays out in our local bars and coffee houses. I do try to make an effort to go to most of his gigs, but when he has two or three in a week's time, I just cannot do it. My HB is an introvert that can force himself to be an extrovert. He got down on me here awhile back because I just cannot do that like he can. I finally had to sit him down and say, look if you want to know and mingle with tons of people and that makes you happy by all means do it, but don't expect that I can. Once he understood that he was really hurting me by trying to force it on me, he eased up. The holidays are the worst for me because there is one social function after another, personal and business related, plus he has gigs inbetween. I'm a wreck over the holidays every year. Makes my depression worse. Khris > > > > Ok this is definitely a pattern. I am INTJ, consistently all my > life. INTJs are about 1% of the population, and 2/3 are male. Have t > we identified at least three female INTJs so far? > > <snip> > > > > Anyone else? > > > > Beverley > > > Yep. Spooky, huh? > > Although on the Meyers-Briggs I was right down the middle on I/E for > the first one. The interviewer asked me questions that were aimed at > figuring out which way I leaned, I or E. In the end, we both felt > that I go with either situation. I think when I'm depressed, which > after this whole NC situation came about didn't get any easier, I > lean more toward I but that is probably to try to stay away from the > world somewhat. Tired of being hurt, one tends to retreat which > isn't always the wisest idea at least for me. > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 I never associated being exhausted by people with personality. I did the typical KO thing and figured I was just lazy, or antisocial, or selfish, etc. I've been blaming myself for not being the life of the party all these years and never once thought it might be a natural tendency. How liberating! My partner performs as well, as an actress and musician, and I've never missed a show, but I've always been miserable at those events when I'm not actually watching her perform. Once I can see her up on stage amid all the lights, really enjoying herself and playing to the crowd, its wonderful: I fall in love with her all over again. But, the rest of the time I'm anxious, exhausted and ready to leave. Maybe knowing that that's just a personality trait will help. Jae Re: True Self Beverly, I'm sure if I ask him, my Doc would say that my ISTJ (Introvert, Sensor, Thinker, Judger) is my false self. I think I would likely disagree with him primarily on the introverted side, because I think I am truly an introvert. Like you, when in a situation that requires me to mingle in large groups, I am exhausted and it takes me a lot of down time alone to recover. My HB plays guitar, is in a band and frequently plays out in our local bars and coffee houses. I do try to make an effort to go to most of his gigs, but when he has two or three in a week's time, I just cannot do it. My HB is an introvert that can force himself to be an extrovert. He got down on me here awhile back because I just cannot do that like he can. I finally had to sit him down and say, look if you want to know and mingle with tons of people and that makes you happy by all means do it, but don't expect that I can. Once he understood that he was really hurting me by trying to force it on me, he eased up. The holidays are the worst for me because there is one social function after another, personal and business related, plus he has gigs inbetween. I'm a wreck over the holidays every year. Makes my depression worse. Khris > > > > Ok this is definitely a pattern. I am INTJ, consistently all my > life. INTJs are about 1% of the population, and 2/3 are male. Have t > we identified at least three female INTJs so far? > > <snip> > > > > Anyone else? > > > > Beverley > > > Yep. Spooky, huh? > > Although on the Meyers-Briggs I was right down the middle on I/E for > the first one. The interviewer asked me questions that were aimed at > figuring out which way I leaned, I or E. In the end, we both felt > that I go with either situation. I think when I'm depressed, which > after this whole NC situation came about didn't get any easier, I > lean more toward I but that is probably to try to stay away from the > world somewhat. Tired of being hurt, one tends to retreat which > isn't always the wisest idea at least for me. > > > > > > > ------------ --------- --------- --- > Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Beverley, thanks for pointing out the true meaning of introverts and extroverts in this context. Everything you said aligned with what I learned about Myers-Briggs. Jae, I'd like to share a thought about your criticism of yourself as antisocial. I had a discussion with my therapist about this topic, because I was wishing that I wanted to make more friends, but I don't want to or feel I need to. She said that maybe you already have the right amount -- not everyone is a social butterfly. It was enlightening for me to know it is OK for me to stay home and read a book when i want to. And that it's normal -- other people feel the same way. > > > > > > Ok this is definitely a pattern. I am INTJ, consistently all my > > life. INTJs are about 1% of the population, and 2/3 are male. Have > t > > we identified at least three female INTJs so far? > > > > <snip> > > > > > > Anyone else? > > > > > > Beverley > > > > > Yep. Spooky, huh? > > > > Although on the Meyers-Briggs I was right down the middle on I/E > for > > the first one. The interviewer asked me questions that were aimed > at > > figuring out which way I leaned, I or E. In the end, we both felt > > that I go with either situation. I think when I'm depressed, which > > after this whole NC situation came about didn't get any easier, I > > lean more toward I but that is probably to try to stay away from > the > > world somewhat. Tired of being hurt, one tends to retreat which > > isn't always the wisest idea at least for me. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ------------ --------- --------- --- > > Be smarter than spam. See how smart SpamGuard is at giving junk > email the boot with the All-new Yahoo! Mail > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 HA,Khris,I thought so! I have a close friend who's an ISTJ and just from reading your posts about meditating over raisins and the dedication you have to doing your job RIGHT,I thought what do you want to bet,this lady is an ISTJ... I don't know if this is apt,but maybe the Psychological Type we are is the personality structure WE developed in order to safeguard our essential needs and in that sense,nobody could call that FALSE. Thank you for including your percentages--I was really struck by how dominant your Judging function is.I have the same exact percentage,but with my Intuition function: 91% to 9%.This is just my own hypothesis,but I think that whatever function we have that is dominant to an extreme represents some inborn capacity we have always had and since we were naturally so talented in that one area,we developed it right to the hilt! In your case,I'd venture that you must be someone who doesn't waste precious time building castles in the air--my friend who is also an ISTJ gets more done in a couple of hours than I manage to do in an entire day. ISTJs are the citizens every society depends upon,because without you guys getting things DONE,society as we know it would completely collapse > > Personality test: I am ISTJ. The results. > > Introverted (I) 82% Extraverted (E) 18% > Sensing (S) 68% Intuitive (N) 32% > Thinking (T) 70% Feeling (F) 30% > Judging (J) 91% Perceiving (P) 9% > > " People of this type tend to be: cautious, conservative, and quiet; > literal, realistic, and practical; careful and precise; logical, > honest, and matter of fact; resistant to change and comfortable with > routine; hard working and responsible " > > That's essentially me in a nutshell and very close to what my office > personality profile says. Only my office one says I like to be > in " charge " , but actually, I just really want to be left alone. > > According to this personality profile, one good career path for a > person like me...a paralegal. That's what I do for a living. Huh, > who'd a thunk it? > > Thanks, that was fun. > > Khris > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Another female INTJ here...interesting that personality array is mostly associated with males. I've always played it off, saying I was " in touch with my masculine side " - in fact, I was the son my fada never had, going to ball games etc. while bro was the son he never wanted and indeed abandoned completely after age 9. Fortunately I work in an office with only 2 people - who spend most of the time in their other residences 1500 miles from the office! It's perfect for me; if I didn't work alone, I wouldn't have the strength for family or social life. In my 20s when I worked for a Big 6 Accounting firm teeming with people, I almost never left the house except to go to work. It was just too exhausting. I too am " home " in my job: tariff compliance administration, a good mixture of rules & regs with emphasis on timely, efficient implementation. Funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Jae: This is the way I am also. If I have a small group of my girlfriends to hang and chat with, it's easier on me. I won't just go up to complete strangers and begin a conversation. Small groups do just fine for me. My comfort zone. Do you also have a problem with people who talk to you too closely or want to hug/touch you somehow? I cannot handle that, but I think that's not a personality trait, that's a phobia. I have very long straight hair and some people just seem compelled to touch it out of the blue and sometimes without warning me that they're going to do it. I've had it happen several times now and it really unnerves me. It makes me feel violated. It's a real invasion of my personal space. But, I'm not big on hugging people either. Seems a particular problem in bars with woman who have has a few too many drinks. LOL. Khris Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Oh thank you for that. The world rests on my shoulders. Get 'r done, Khris! ; ) ROFLMAO. Khris I'd venture that you > must be someone who doesn't waste precious time building castles in > the air--my friend who is also an ISTJ gets more done in a couple of > hours than I manage to do in an entire day. > > ISTJs are the citizens every society depends upon,because without > you guys getting things DONE,society as we know it would completely > collapse > > > > > > Personality test: I am ISTJ. The results. > > > > Introverted (I) 82% Extraverted (E) 18% > > Sensing (S) 68% Intuitive (N) 32% > > Thinking (T) 70% Feeling (F) 30% > > Judging (J) 91% Perceiving (P) 9% > > > > " People of this type tend to be: cautious, conservative, and quiet; > > literal, realistic, and practical; careful and precise; logical, > > honest, and matter of fact; resistant to change and comfortable > with > > routine; hard working and responsible " > > > > That's essentially me in a nutshell and very close to what my > office > > personality profile says. Only my office one says I like to be > > in " charge " , but actually, I just really want to be left alone. > > > > According to this personality profile, one good career path for a > > person like me...a paralegal. That's what I do for a living. Huh, > > who'd a thunk it? > > > > Thanks, that was fun. > > > > Khris > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Really interesting how Judging and Introversion keep coming up...I'm an INFP,have had the same result since my twenties and always with extremely dominant Intuition...I guess I just am what I am My percentages stay pretty consistent,too: Introverted (I) 54% Extraverted (E) 46% Intuitive (N) 91% Sensing (S) 9% Feeling (F) 65% Thinking (T) 35% Perceiving (P) 82% Judging (J) 18% I know from reading what nada chose fit to write down in my baby book (that she kept until I was five),that I've always been strangely intuitive,just knowing stuff like I was hearing it on the wind.That cannot possibly be why,right,there must be some process of encoding information that is going on.But in true nada fashion,she believed that I must have been " possessed " because I just knew things,like asking her if the illustrations in my " Ananzi The Spider " book were inspired by the Nazca Lines of Peru when I was two,which freaked her out so much,she wrote it down,wondering if she should call in a priest to have me excorsized (nada was raised Catholic).I don't know how I knew that,hell,maybe I saw it on tv,god knows fada left it on all the time and made no attempt to shield me from whatever he was watching--I must have seen all the blood and gore and bizarreness the tube can emit.But I'm glad I was able to hold fast to what must be an innate element of my character,despite being made to feel like a freak,which is something I still struggle with and that's what I really like about the Myers-Briggs,it reassures you that that's just how you happen to function and that's ok! > > Personality test: I am ISTJ. The results. > > Introverted (I) 82% Extraverted (E) 18% > Sensing (S) 68% Intuitive (N) 32% > Thinking (T) 70% Feeling (F) 30% > Judging (J) 91% Perceiving (P) 9% > > " People of this type tend to be: cautious, conservative, and quiet; > literal, realistic, and practical; careful and precise; logical, > honest, and matter of fact; resistant to change and comfortable with > routine; hard working and responsible " > > That's essentially me in a nutshell and very close to what my office > personality profile says. Only my office one says I like to be > in " charge " , but actually, I just really want to be left alone. > > According to this personality profile, one good career path for a > person like me...a paralegal. That's what I do for a living. Huh, > who'd a thunk it? > > Thanks, that was fun. > > Khris > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Natch,Khris,I meant that as a compliment - > > > > > > Personality test: I am ISTJ. The results. > > > > > > Introverted (I) 82% Extraverted (E) 18% > > > Sensing (S) 68% Intuitive (N) 32% > > > Thinking (T) 70% Feeling (F) 30% > > > Judging (J) 91% Perceiving (P) 9% > > > > > > " People of this type tend to be: cautious, conservative, and > quiet; > > > literal, realistic, and practical; careful and precise; logical, > > > honest, and matter of fact; resistant to change and comfortable > > with > > > routine; hard working and responsible " > > > > > > That's essentially me in a nutshell and very close to what my > > office > > > personality profile says. Only my office one says I like to be > > > in " charge " , but actually, I just really want to be left alone. > > > > > > According to this personality profile, one good career path for a > > > person like me...a paralegal. That's what I do for a living. > Huh, > > > who'd a thunk it? > > > > > > Thanks, that was fun. > > > > > > Khris > > > > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > > > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 I just did the test INTJ female also. I think that is my false self, b/c bev's description of her job is just like mine for the last 10 yrs, and I am dying to find a way out. This is way weird! -- In WTOAdultChildren1 , " sage153 " wrote: > > Hi! I am INTJ female too...think you're onto something! > > > > > > > Ok this is definitely a pattern. I am INTJ, consistently all my > life. > > INTJs are about 1% of the population, and 2/3 are male. Have t we > > identified at least three female INTJs so far? That would mean > this > > board is about 300 people( most of whom are silent hence still an > > unusual event), or MAYBE it is a clue to KOs and being raised by > BPD. > > Needing order and being flexible and imagination to deal with > changing > > realities? I worked at policy and program evaluation all my > working > > life and felt it was home. Designing and redesigning programs and > > policies to make things work better, AND implementing them, two > > functions that usually do not go together. > > > > > > Anyone else? > > > > > > Beverley > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Khris, I don't really like to be touched either, actually I'm uncomfortable with most signs of affection. Too much contact makes me feel unprotected I guess, like air is a shield? Its not very logical, but is that the same with you? I've gotten a little more used to hugging since I went to college. I immediately sought out the homosexual student organizations, and apparently the gay community is very pro-hugging. There's a lot of " oh, you're gay too! I must hug you now even though I don't know you. " , I've experienced that with fellow students, co-workers, people in bars and restaurants, you name it. It took some getting used to! Any other contact makes me really nervous. I never know how to respond either, to that or to compliments. Its only the nice stuff though, I can handle being screamed at or insulted, or even hit. But flattery, gifts and affection I can't handle. Think Nada might have a bit to do with that! But I'm glad to know personality has something to do with it to. I don't have to feel bad, or think I'm giving in to a flea, when I just want to curl up with a book and my cat and unplug the phone. Also, what's with the hair touching? That hasn't happened to me, but I do know a girl with really long hair like you described. Granted, she does have a gorgeous head of hair, almost down to her waist, but strangers will just like stroke a lock of it or fondle it without asking permission or even introducing themselves. Its weird! I've never understood it. I can't imagine they'd like someone grabbing at their hair. Maybe you should do that next time so they can see how intrusive it is. Jae Re: True Self Jae: This is the way I am also. If I have a small group of my girlfriends to hang and chat with, it's easier on me. I won't just go up to complete strangers and begin a conversation. Small groups do just fine for me. My comfort zone. Do you also have a problem with people who talk to you too closely or want to hug/touch you somehow? I cannot handle that, but I think that's not a personality trait, that's a phobia. I have very long straight hair and some people just seem compelled to touch it out of the blue and sometimes without warning me that they're going to do it. I've had it happen several times now and it really unnerves me. It makes me feel violated. It's a real invasion of my personal space. But, I'm not big on hugging people either. Seems a particular problem in bars with woman who have has a few too many drinks. LOL. Khris ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile.yahoo.com/;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR8HDtDypao8Wcj9tAcJ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 And so it was taken. I'm just joking. Sorry, dry sense of humor sometimes too. LOL. > > > > > > > > Personality test: I am ISTJ. The results. > > > > > > > > Introverted (I) 82% Extraverted (E) 18% > > > > Sensing (S) 68% Intuitive (N) 32% > > > > Thinking (T) 70% Feeling (F) 30% > > > > Judging (J) 91% Perceiving (P) 9% > > > > > > > > " People of this type tend to be: cautious, conservative, and > > quiet; > > > > literal, realistic, and practical; careful and precise; > logical, > > > > honest, and matter of fact; resistant to change and comfortable > > > with > > > > routine; hard working and responsible " > > > > > > > > That's essentially me in a nutshell and very close to what my > > > office > > > > personality profile says. Only my office one says I like to be > > > > in " charge " , but actually, I just really want to be left alone. > > > > > > > > According to this personality profile, one good career path for > a > > > > person like me...a paralegal. That's what I do for a living. > > Huh, > > > > who'd a thunk it? > > > > > > > > Thanks, that was fun. > > > > > > > > Khris > > > > > > > > > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > > > > > > > Connect and share in new ways with Windows Live. > > > > > > > http://www.windowslive.com/share.html? > > > > > > ocid=TXT_TAGHM_Wave2_sharelife_012008 > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Jae, I do think that the not liking to be touched comes from my nada's abuse. I'm with ya', hit me, yell at me, swear at me, I can handle that, just don't be nice to me? How freaking bizarre is that? The hair thing though I really cannot explain. Maybe I should do it back to someone else next time they do it to me and see just how they like it. My hair is also waist length. There must be something about the smoothness or straightness that gets people. The only hairs on my head that curl are the gray ones. Ugh! I just pluck those puppies out because they're easy to spot, even though I'm blonde. They curl right on up like a ringlet. All those years I permed and curled and teased my hair to get it curly and all I really needed to do was get old. Ha ha. The worst thing I had happen to me with my hair was a guy in Lowes who just walked up behind me while I was looking at paint colors in an aisle like anyone else and ran his hand down the back of my hair. That really freaked me out. He said that he just couldn't resist. I explained to him that he was very lucky I didn't nail him in the nads and he went away apologetically. Scared the crap out of me. I hadn't even made any eye contact with the guy. Didn't even see him. He came out of nowhere and with no warning. I have quite a few gay and lesbian friends and they are not the culprits. They are usually the ones most respectful of my outer air boundaries. Khris > > Khris, > > I don't really like to be touched either, actually I'm uncomfortable with most signs of affection. Too much contact makes me feel unprotected I guess, like air is a shield? Its not very logical, but is that the same with you? I've gotten a little more used to hugging since I went to college. I immediately sought out the homosexual student organizations, and apparently the gay community is very pro-hugging. There's a lot of " oh, you're gay too! I must hug you now even though I don't know you. " , I've experienced that with fellow students, co-workers, people in bars and restaurants, you name it. It took some getting used to! > > Any other contact makes me really nervous. I never know how to respond either, to that or to compliments. Its only the nice stuff though, I can handle being screamed at or insulted, or even hit. But flattery, gifts and affection I can't handle. Think Nada might have a bit to do with that! But I'm glad to know personality has something to do with it to. I don't have to feel bad, or think I'm giving in to a flea, when I just want to curl up with a book and my cat and unplug the phone. > > Also, what's with the hair touching? That hasn't happened to me, but I do know a girl with really long hair like you described. Granted, she does have a gorgeous head of hair, almost down to her waist, but strangers will just like stroke a lock of it or fondle it without asking permission or even introducing themselves. Its weird! I've never understood it. I can't imagine they'd like someone grabbing at their hair. Maybe you should do that next time so they can see how intrusive it is. > > > Jae > > > Re: True Self > > Jae: > > This is the way I am also. If I have a small group of my girlfriends > to hang and chat with, it's easier on me. I won't just go up to > complete strangers and begin a conversation. Small groups do just > fine for me. My comfort zone. > > Do you also have a problem with people who talk to you too closely or > want to hug/touch you somehow? I cannot handle that, but I think > that's not a personality trait, that's a phobia. > > I have very long straight hair and some people just seem compelled to > touch it out of the blue and sometimes without warning me that > they're going to do it. I've had it happen several times now and it > really unnerves me. It makes me feel violated. It's a real invasion > of my personal space. But, I'm not big on hugging people either. > Seems a particular problem in bars with woman who have has a few too > many drinks. LOL. > > Khris > > > > > > ______________________________________________________________________ ______________ > Be a better friend, newshound, and > know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile.yahoo.com/;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR8HDtDypao8Wcj9tAcJ > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 31, 2008 Report Share Posted January 31, 2008 Ah, well, the working environment was another thing entirely; INTJ females were unfamiliar to the group and they kept trying to make me over into someone else. But I had tried several different kinds of work, and I knew the work wasnt at fault, but the rest of the world was wrong. ( Ha!) Especially when I got my INTJ results. I eventually burned out and retired early. But I did and still love the nature of the work. And now do some as a consultant from home and am happy with it. I did suffer a lot in the world because I never fit in, was always apprehensive and anxious; knew what I knew this, and respected others but my social skills werent in line with the rest of the world. A common finding for INTJ which made me feel safer. B lgarter518 wrote: I just did the test INTJ female also. I think that is my false self, b/c bev's description of her job is just like mine for the last 10 yrs, and I am dying to find a way out. This is way weird! -- In WTOAdultChildren1 , " sage153 " wrote: > > Hi! I am INTJ female too...think you're onto something! > > > > > > > Ok this is definitely a pattern. I am INTJ, consistently all my > life. > > INTJs are about 1% of the population, and 2/3 are male. Have t we > > identified at least three female INTJs so far? That would mean > this > > board is about 300 people( most of whom are silent hence still an > > unusual event), or MAYBE it is a clue to KOs and being raised by > BPD. > > Needing order and being flexible and imagination to deal with > changing > > realities? I worked at policy and program evaluation all my > working > > life and felt it was home. Designing and redesigning programs and > > policies to make things work better, AND implementing them, two > > functions that usually do not go together. > > > > > > Anyone else? > > > > > > Beverley > > > --------------------------------- Ask a question on any topic and get answers from real people. Go to Yahoo! Answers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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