Turns Out - All I Had To Do Was Ask - Thank you everyone!

[Guest guest]

Well - it's only been 4 days since I picked up the Eggshells book at

Borders and found this website. Since then, I have received amazing

support and tips from so many of you. I thought I had been open to

receiving help in the past, but I guess I was still somehow

protecting what I saw as my secret - having a Mom who is BPD. Just

by being more open here in this group, with a few trusted friends

and my wonderful husband, I have received an outpouring of support

that has completely bowled me over.

This morning, a good friend at work brought me a tiara and a magic

wand that plays a tune when you wave it. She handed it to me with a

huge smile and a big hug and said that I deserve all the happiness

in the world. This woman is a mother with a son who is in and out

of rehab with drugs, and sometimes jail, but she knew I was having a

tough time and she was so motherly and healing to me. I just felt

wrapped in warmth from her. It was the true feeling of motherly

love.

This is a lesson for me, and many of us I suspect. For 45 years I

have been told that I was ungrateful, uncaring, selfish, not there

for my Mom, and that I was a bad seed and her devil daughter. For

the first time, deep in my core, I really believe it's not true.

All I had to do was ask for help and stop carrying the whole thing

around on my shoulders.

Feeling better,

Tag