WARNING SEXUAL CONTENT Re: Re: Nadas and sexual development

[Guest guest]

I'm sorry it happened to you to!! It was such a gross experience.

To this day I'm very shy about bathroom issues cuz I don't want to be

like her. Yuck.

> > Girlscout,

> >

> > I have been lurking on this board for the last few months

> (struggling

> > in grad school), but I HAD to write after reading your post.

> > I also hid my period from my mother! I thought I was the only

one!!

> > I've never heard of anyone else who felt the need to do that. I

got

> my

> > period on a Saturday morning, and knew right away what it was

from

> my

> > friends and watching " that video in fourth grade. " I remember

> thinking

> > that " she won't help me " - meaning that she would not buy me pads

or

> > tampons, much less painkillers (I had severe cramps). I was also

> > afraid she would tell my narcissistic older brother, or somehow

> invade

> > my privacy or embarrass me. I just knew I could not trust her or

> tell her.

> >

> > This is sad, and I apologize in advance if this is TMI for anyone

> > (please don't read if you think you might get grossed out)- but

that

> > weekend I used the one pad she had in our family bathroom, and

after

> > that just changed my soiled underwear about 15 times. :-( My plan

> was

> > to wait until I could get to middle school on Monday and walk home

> > through town, where I could buy some " feminine products. " I hid

all

> > the stained underwear in my armoir. I was afraid she would find

> them,

> > and know what was happening. She found them though, and yelled and

> > cried because I stained my clothes and was becoming a " dirty young

> > lady. " She called my aunts on both sides of the FOO to tell them

> what

> > I did, adding it to my lists of faults. *I can still feel the

shame

> I

> > felt when I overheard those conversations - she used the

telephone

> in

> > the kitchen* She STILL didn't buy me any pads though - so I had to

> > keep changing my underwear and followed through with the plan of

> > walking home from school and buying my own. I bleached all the

> > underwear I owned.

> >

> > In response to your question about repression, um YES that

describes

> > my nada to a T. She believed only " sluts " wore tampons, and tried

to

> > get my father to punish me when she discovered I had my first

kiss.

> > (He didn't do that though, he just asked me to tell him what kind

of

> > guy he was and reminded me to make careful choices). She also once

> > found a note my friends and I were passing back and forth in the

7th

> > grade where we were talking to each about what we thought sex

might

> be

> > like. She was so furious with me for having a " gutter mind " she

> > literally would not speak with me for days. I was beside myself

> > sobbing for her to talk to me. Once again, she tried to have my

> father

> > punish me, and once again he just volunteered to answer my

questions

> > (which I wasn't really comfortable discussing with him at the

time,

> > but it was a response that seriously relieved me from believing I

> was

> > a whore).

> >

> > - April

> >

> > ------------ --------- --------- ---

> > Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage.

> >

> >