Guest guest Posted September 11, 2002 Report Share Posted September 11, 2002 >>Most people whose colons rupture do not make it.<< Praise the lord and Welcome Kay! Maribeth 302/226.2/160 Re: Roll Call My name is Kay and I am a native Californian. I have fought weight since I was 13. I received my black belt in tae kwon do the week I turned 60 and in the next six months both my appendix and my large colon ruptured, so I have not yet been able to train for second degree. I cannot work yet, either, until my inners stabilize so with no exercise for the past year and a soft diet (too much Ben and Jerry's!), I have come home to roost at WW and I am very peaceful with that decision. I am trying to walk five miles a week and I am very glad to be alive. Most people whose colons rupture do not make it. I look forward to meeting many new friends here! Kay Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 28, 2010 Report Share Posted November 28, 2010 Hi Marilyn, You are a wonderful sister. You write that you keep your brother's location secret to your sisters. I don't know your entire 'family story' but you may want to consider why they want to see him. In many families people become estranged, and many times for something very petty and stupid. If they did something like that, perhaps they are sorry and want to make amends...once your brother is gone, your sisters will not have that opportunity. Personally, I welcomed everyone who was estranged to have the chance to either visit or speak with Mom. Some did; some declined. They made their decisions and I have a clear conscience that I did whatever I should have done. They have to live with their consciences. Yes...they did get Mom all confused and then just left with me to put all the pieces together...but I gave them time with Mom that they will always treasure. > > Hi > I am the second youngest in a family of seven, six girls and one boy. My oldest sister passed away from colon cancer in 2008. A year prior to that I noticed my brother, the second oldest, was showing signs of memory loss. In hind sight I see that there > were signs earlier than that really. I am his POA and only care giver. After 17 year of marriage his wife tossed him aside once her children had their citizenship and had graduated from college. He had set his life up around what he thought was his new family and looked to retired and enjoy family life. But instead was left on his own. > > He moved to independent living and worked until 2008, age 74. Last year he moved to another independent living apartment complex about 1/4 mile from us. His memory issues continued to get worse. His PC physician put him on Aricept and I set up an appointment for him with a Geriatric Specialist. After testing and interview he was diagnosed with Alzheimer's type Dementia. > > I have spend endless hours with him for the past few years and looked into his eyes in his deepest darkest times of paranoia, fear, anxiety and total confusion. I have been called a lier, cheater, stealer and heard him pass on stories about me doing these things. I know that when he says the things he truly believes them and feels he has > seen me do the things. For these reason I question the diagnosis of Alzheimer's type Dementia. I was the care giver for my Mom and Aunt and worked with seniors with Alzheimer's type dementia and my brother, God Bless him, is by far the most challenging I have ever seen. > > By the Grace of God I was able to find a wonderful Assisted Living facility that provides the safest and healthiest quality of living available to him. I planned everything to allow him to think he was in control of making all the choices when in fact it was a done deal. > If he would not have gone along with it my only choice would have been to take him to court and go for Guardianship. But we were blessed and so far so good. > > He still has bouts of paranoia and lots of confusion but with a smaller studio apartment and a scheduled day he is happier and his " rants and bouts " are not as severe as they had been. I feel there is less chance for over stimulation in this setting > and that has lessened his anxiety. > > I worked hard at covering his move because his Xwife has followed his moves before this. She is a money hungry witch with a cash register where ones heart usually is. She would stop at nothing to set him up to get his money or have him sign papers for a " new/her " Will. My sisters who have had no contact with him or helped him through any of his life challenges suddenly feel they should have total access to him. I have kept his location and phone number confidential so far. > This is the safest and most comfortable he has been in ages. I cannot afford to have someone, accidentally, rock his boat. He deserves better than that and once the boat is rocked they are gone, never to be seen to help clean or pick up the pieces. > > As long as he is healthy, happy and safe my heart is clear with all the decisions I have made for him. I take one day at a time and don't look back or worry about whats ahead. > > I may not post a lot but I am so very thankful for this Group and all its members. > Thank You > Marilyn > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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