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We have all fought the good fight with Lewy, and while our LO's show some

temporary lightening of the symptoms, eventually we all come to the realization

that we can go the distance with Lewy, but he wins in the end. Until medical

research comes up with something, there are only meds that help for awhile.

None of us have laid down and just given up...we have all fought. But keep your

hope...and keep your fight. It will help you to know that you have done

everything possible for your LO. Nan

>

> Dear people,

>

> I deeply commiserate with all on the list who lost their loved ones, but

> where are the messages about trying to improve? Or do you feel this is all

> about deterioration and praying much (I'm an atheist).

>

> Olga

>

>

>

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There has, unfortunately, been a lot of loss lately. And holiday seasons,

especially the December holidays, seem to bring more than other times and,

for those whose loss was a while back, make their loss particularly fresh.

I, too, offer my condolences to all who have lost loved ones. Regardless

of how much we want to ease our loved ones' pain and let them go, it is

still very difficult to lose someone.

Many of our correspondents find comfort in their faith, any faith. They

wish to offer comfort in the way that is most familiar and helpful to them

- through thoughts and prayers. I invite anyone who does not wish to be

prayed for to state so when it is their turn to notify others of their own

loss. Yet, I believe that the kind and gracious thing to do is to thank

others for their prayers, concern, thoughts or whatever you want to call

their expression of sympathy.

I have yet to see a question asked or concern raised that hasn't prompted

the advice and/or sharing of another's experience. I'm not all that sure

this is listserv is about trying to improve so much as it is about helping

each other through this experience in any way we can. If someone does have

a question or concern, I hope that they are comfortable raising it, as I am

sure there will be an appropriate response. Perhaps the lack of other

subject matter is a reflection of a temporary lessening of need in that

area, just as much as the increase in expressed sympathy may be a response

to the increase in loss or the feeling of loss.

Yes, I have noticed that emails seem to weigh heavily in the expression of

loss or sympathy lately. But if one wants to change the subject matter,

one should raise other issues or concerns. If you don't like the

conversation, change the subject.

Neither am I the most religious person in the world. But time has taught

me that a thought can be a prayer and a prayer can be a thought. Raging at

God can be just as much of a prayer as pleading with God, or offering " Thy

will be done. " For past losses and for the one to come, I am grateful for

all expressions of concern, sympathy, empathy or whatever else, no matter

how it is expressed. It is ungracious to complain of the frequency or

manner of these expressions.

Kathy

On Thu, Dec 29, 2011 at 6:19 PM, Olga Shaumyan wrote:

> **

>

>

> Dear people,

>

> I deeply commiserate with all on the list who lost their loved ones, but

> where are the messages about trying to improve? Or do you feel this is all

> about deterioration and praying much (I'm an atheist).

>

> Olga

>

>

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Very well written Kathy. I second what you wrote. I have family that doesn't

pray but says wishes which I support. Whatever the wording, whatever the

thought I believe it's nice having support from others. Sandie Des Moines, IA

dad, Merle, passed from LBD 9-20-02, age 65

----- Re: this list

Date: Fri, 30 Dec 2011 07:11:32 -0600

There has, unfortunately, been a lot of loss lately. And holiday seasons,

especially the December holidays, seem to bring more than other times and,

for those whose loss was a while back, make their loss particularly fresh.

I, too, offer my condolences to all who have lost loved ones. Regardless

of how much we want to ease our loved ones' pain and let them go, it is

still very difficult to lose someone.

Many of our correspondents find comfort in their faith, any faith. They

wish to offer comfort in the way that is most familiar and helpful to them

- through thoughts and prayers. I invite anyone who does not wish to be

prayed for to state so when it is their turn to notify others of their own

loss. Yet, I believe that the kind and gracious thing to do is to thank

others for their prayers, concern, thoughts or whatever you want to call

their expression of sympathy.

I have yet to see a question asked or concern raised that hasn't prompted

the advice and/or sharing of another's experience. I'm not all that sure

this is listserv is about trying to improve so much as it is about helping

each other through this experience in any way we can. If someone does have

a question or concern, I hope that they are comfortable raising it, as I am

sure there will be an appropriate response. Perhaps the lack of other

subject matter is a reflection of a temporary lessening of need in that

area, just as much as the increase in expressed sympathy may be a response

to the increase in loss or the feeling of loss.

Yes, I have noticed that emails seem to weigh heavily in the expression of

loss or sympathy lately. But if one wants to change the subject matter,

one should raise other issues or concerns. If you don't like the

conversation, change the subject.

Neither am I the most religious person in the world. But time has taught

me that a thought can be a prayer and a prayer can be a thought. Raging at

God can be just as much of a prayer as pleading with God, or offering " Thy

will be done. " For past losses and for the one to come, I am grateful for

all expressions of concern, sympathy, empathy or whatever else, no matter

how it is expressed. It is ungracious to complain of the frequency or

manner of these expressions.

Kathy

On Thu, Dec 29, 2011 at 6:19 PM, Olga Shaumyan wrote:

> **

>

>

> Dear people,

>

> I deeply commiserate with all on the list who lost their loved ones, but

> where are the messages about trying to improve? Or do you feel this is all

> about deterioration and praying much (I'm an atheist).

>

> Olga

>

>

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Olga,

This list is about many things--sharing of comfort, support, advice,

information...I could go on. Personally, this list has been a lifelline. When my

mom was diagnosed, I was floundering and hopeless. Connecting with the people

here helped me to come back from that. I have learned a great deal about Lewy

Body Disease from this group which has helped my understanding regarding what my

mom is experiencing. I don't know how long you have been part of this group, but

I'm sure you will find much help here if you give it a chance. If you have

specific concerns or questions, feel free to post them. I have also benefited by

looking through the files section and searching subject matter in older posts.

With regard to current postings, there seems to be cycles; periods in which many

questions are asked and information shared and other periods in which things are

quiet. As to sending condolences and offering prayer...many find this

comforting, both the giver and the receiver. If this is offensive to you, don't

read those posts. There is not one person, I'm sure, who wishes to offend. We

hope you stay with us, Olga. There is much to give and receive through this

group.

Katy; daughter to Jill, age 72; dx 2008

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Olga,

You wrote,

" where are the messages about trying to improve? "

Perhaps your LO is only recently diagnosed with LBD and you are unaware

that it is an incurable, progressively deteriorating disease. The

medications used are not an exact science and work differently on different

people, most are only effective for a few months of holding back the

disease process, not years. There can be no lasting " improvement " at this

time. It is all downhill and you need to be prepared for the downward

spiral. This group provides information and moral/emotional support for the

caregivers dealing with the inevitable decline.

Best Wishes,

Pat M.

58, Wife/caregiver of Bob, 75, dx PD 2003, LBD 2009

> **

>

>

> Very well written Kathy. I second what you wrote. I have family that

> doesn't pray but says wishes which I support. Whatever the wording,

> whatever the thought I believe it's nice having support from others. Sandie

> Des Moines, IA dad, Merle, passed from LBD 9-20-02, age 65

>

>

> ----- Re: this list

> Date: Fri, 30 Dec 2011 07:11:32 -0600

>

> There has, unfortunately, been a lot of loss lately. And holiday seasons,

> especially the December holidays, seem to bring more than other times and,

> for those whose loss was a while back, make their loss particularly fresh.

> I, too, offer my condolences to all who have lost loved ones. Regardless

> of how much we want to ease our loved ones' pain and let them go, it is

> still very difficult to lose someone.

>

> Many of our correspondents find comfort in their faith, any faith. They

> wish to offer comfort in the way that is most familiar and helpful to them

> - through thoughts and prayers. I invite anyone who does not wish to be

> prayed for to state so when it is their turn to notify others of their own

> loss. Yet, I believe that the kind and gracious thing to do is to thank

> others for their prayers, concern, thoughts or whatever you want to call

> their expression of sympathy.

>

> I have yet to see a question asked or concern raised that hasn't prompted

> the advice and/or sharing of another's experience. I'm not all that sure

> this is listserv is about trying to improve so much as it is about helping

> each other through this experience in any way we can. If someone does have

> a question or concern, I hope that they are comfortable raising it, as I am

> sure there will be an appropriate response. Perhaps the lack of other

> subject matter is a reflection of a temporary lessening of need in that

> area, just as much as the increase in expressed sympathy may be a response

> to the increase in loss or the feeling of loss.

>

> Yes, I have noticed that emails seem to weigh heavily in the expression of

> loss or sympathy lately. But if one wants to change the subject matter,

> one should raise other issues or concerns. If you don't like the

> conversation, change the subject.

>

> Neither am I the most religious person in the world. But time has taught

> me that a thought can be a prayer and a prayer can be a thought. Raging at

> God can be just as much of a prayer as pleading with God, or offering " Thy

> will be done. " For past losses and for the one to come, I am grateful for

> all expressions of concern, sympathy, empathy or whatever else, no matter

> how it is expressed. It is ungracious to complain of the frequency or

> manner of these expressions.

>

> Kathy

>

> On Thu, Dec 29, 2011 at 6:19 PM, Olga Shaumyan <olga.shaumyan@...

> >wrote:

>

> > **

> >

> >

> > Dear people,

> >

> > I deeply commiserate with all on the list who lost their loved ones, but

> > where are the messages about trying to improve? Or do you feel this is

> all

> > about deterioration and praying much (I'm an atheist).

> >

> > Olga

> >

> >

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Dear Sandie,

As usual, beautifully said!

Helene in NY

>

> > **

> >

> >

> > Dear people,

> >

> > I deeply commiserate with all on the list who lost their loved ones, but

> > where are the messages about trying to improve? Or do you feel this is all

> > about deterioration and praying much (I'm an atheist).

> >

> > Olga

> >

> >

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Dear Vivian,

Great attitude. Admire your courage and optimism. Myself, I'm not managing so

well. My husband doesn't want to walk... for no reason... out of the blue. When

he wandered off plenty before. The bedroom involves stairs, the bathroom

involves stairs, the bath involves climbing into it. He's no baby, he's heavy.

We live in a rented accommodation. I can perhaps ship him off to a home (how

much? plus his family are stalling for incomprehensible reasons), in which case

I cannot remain in ours (too expensive). I'm now more or less running out of

excuses to send him to hospital. Before I could say he used to be mobile but

it's now over 2 months that by the end of the week he lies down in the bed and

refuses to do anything. And any disturbance is met with hostility. And I very

much doubt he knows who I am. I'm often " the nasty boy " . It's an unfortunate

combination of some unfunny charade against the background of poor financial

planning. So, yes, I'm mightily discouraged and depressed, but I am trying to

find some type of solution. I actually do not think the way things are, they

benefit either me or (my husband).

I would still insist that prayers are great but practical advice/experience is

better.

And I don't know how mature I am, is the second demented person in my life,

but I certainly dislike being that uncertain (especially on behalf of another

human being), whoever Finley is.

Olga

> > >

> > >>

> > >

> > >> Dear people,

> > >

> > >>

> > >

> > >> I deeply commiserate with all on the list who lost their loved ones, but

> > >

> > >> where are the messages about trying to improve? Or do you feel this is

> > all

> > >

> > >> about deterioration and praying much (I'm an atheist).

> > >

> > >>

> > >

> > >> Olga

> > >

> > >>

> > >

> > >>

> > >

> > >>

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Thank you, Vivian. Keep your spirit up. I'll see what I can do about mine. Olga.

> > > > >

> > > > >>

> > > > >

> > > > >> Dear people,

> > > > >

> > > > >>

> > > > >

> > > > >> I deeply commiserate with all on the list who lost their loved

> > ones, but

> > > > >

> > > > >> where are the messages about trying to improve? Or do you feel this

> > is

> > > > all

> > > > >

> > > > >> about deterioration and praying much (I'm an atheist).

> > > > >

> > > > >>

> > > > >

> > > > >> Olga

> > > > >

> > > > >>

> > > > >

> > > > >>

> > > > >

> > > > >>

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Janet - you're referring to the Lewy Body Society in the UK -- their website is

this:

http://www.lewybody.co.uk/

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >>

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >> Dear people,

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >>

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >> I deeply commiserate with all on the list who lost their loved

> > >> ones, but

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >> where are the messages about trying to improve? Or do you feel

> > this

> > >> is

> > >> > > all

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >> about deterioration and praying much (I'm an atheist).

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >>

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >> Olga

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >>

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >>

> > >> > > >

> > >> > > >>

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