Guest guest Posted January 8, 2012 Report Share Posted January 8, 2012 Hi Judy, My husband Bob goes to an Adult Day Center one day a week from 7:30 am to 5:45pm and it is wonderful for both of us. He is well taken care of there is an LPN there at all times with a CNA for every 6 patients or so. They have excercises, games, activities, music, hot lunch and snacks. I really look forward to that as my day off each week to do my shopping and appointments for myself. Other people do bring their LO daily and drop them off on the way to work. Here in Wisconsin they charge 60 dollars per day. I don't know what the cost is for your area there. You would need to see if you can justify the expense out of pocket as it is not covered by Medicare or any insurance. If you or your Mom can afford it, I would recommend you go ahead with it on a trial basis to see how it works out for your Mom. Best Wishes, Pat M. wife caregiver of Bob dx PD 2003, LBD 2009 > ** > > > Hello friends, > > I was thinking of enrolling my mother in a recreation program at a local > nursing home in moms neighborhood. > > Although she is in the late stages of LBD - She spends most of the day in > the wheel chair watching tv - > > I am taking on more work now and long to see mom more socially involved > with other people..... > > Has anyone enrolled a loved one in this kind of a program?? > > All advice or input will be appreciated. > > Thank you, > > Judy > > Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > > University of Phoenix > Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > Jersey City, NJ 07310 > Cell: > Email: Jrstr@... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2012 Report Share Posted January 8, 2012 Judy, Bob started attending the Day Center in Nov. 2010 and is still going there. He is able to feed himself if they cut up his food in bite size pieces for him. He needs assistance to get up from a chair but is able to walk unaided once he is on his feet. Lately he is getting more unsteady and they are keeping a gait belt on him and one aide beside him as he walks. He needs to be helped with dressing and undressing and toileting. They have him on a toilet every two hour schedule but he has some constant urine dribbling issues due to benign prostate enlargement. So he does wear adult pullup diapers. The Curative Workshop he attends has some people wheelchair bound and some more independent than Bob. You should visit the Adult Day Program in your area that you are considering and take a tour to examine it in person. Then you could ask them if they have any transportation available. The place my husband goes does have what they call a " morning wake-up service " where they send a CNA to the home to shower and dress the patient and then a shuttle bus type vehicle will deliver them to the Center. That is another extra fee. I do not use that service so do not know that much about it. You can ask the place you are thinking about something like that. Good Luck, Pat M. > ** > > > Hi Pat, > > Thank you for your response. I'm glad to hear Bob participated in a > program like this and it worked out nicely. I would hope my mom would get > the supervision you describe was offered to bob. What stage of the disease > was bob in when he participated in this recreation ? Could he still feed > himself ? > > The cost sounds reasonable.... I wonder if we could arrange moms schedule > to go half a day for 2 days of the week. > > My thought is that this would give our 24 hour helper a break > instead of having someone else come in to care for mom several days a week. > Getting mom together with others while giving some free time > would be well worth the funds. > > I wonder if would need to drop off mom or if they would provide > some sort of transportation ? > > > Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > > University of Phoenix > Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > Jersey City, NJ 07310 > Cell: > Email: Jrstr@... > > > > > > Hi Judy, > > My husband Bob goes to an Adult Day Center one day a week from 7:30 am to > > 5:45pm and it is wonderful for both of us. He is well taken care of there > > is an LPN there at all times with a CNA for every 6 patients or so. They > > have excercises, games, activities, music, hot lunch and snacks. I really > > look forward to that as my day off each week to do my shopping and > > appointments for myself. Other people do bring their LO daily and drop > > them off on the way to work. Here in Wisconsin they charge 60 dollars per > > day. I don't know what the cost is for your area there. You would need to > > see if you can justify the expense out of pocket as it is not covered by > > Medicare or any insurance. If you or your Mom can afford it, I would > > recommend you go ahead with it on a trial basis to see how it works out > for > > your Mom. > > Best Wishes, > > Pat M. > > wife caregiver of Bob dx PD 2003, LBD 2009 > > > > > > > >> ** > > >> > >> > >> Hello friends, > >> > >> I was thinking of enrolling my mother in a recreation program at a local > >> nursing home in moms neighborhood. > >> > >> Although she is in the late stages of LBD - She spends most of the day > in > >> the wheel chair watching tv - > >> > >> I am taking on more work now and long to see mom more socially involved > >> with other people..... > >> > >> Has anyone enrolled a loved one in this kind of a program?? > >> > >> All advice or input will be appreciated. > >> > >> Thank you, > >> > >> Judy > >> > >> Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > >> Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > >> > >> University of Phoenix > >> Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > >> Jersey City, NJ 07310 > >> Cell: > >> Email: Jrstr@... > >> > >> > >> > >> > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2012 Report Share Posted January 8, 2012 Yes, Judy, I agree it is well worth looking into for your Mom. I hope the place you are considering is as nice and well staffed as the Curative Workshop where my Bob attends. I am happy to answer questions or help in any way I can. Best Wishes, Pat M. > ** > > > Pat- > > I appreciate all your wisdom on this. I think this could be a wonderful > choice for mom so she need not be alone all the time. > > Thanks again, > > > Judy > > Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > > University of Phoenix > Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > Jersey City, NJ 07310 > Cell: > Email: Jrstr@... > > > > > > Judy, > > Bob started attending the Day Center in Nov. 2010 and is still going > > there. He is able to feed himself > > if they cut up his food in bite size pieces for him. He needs assistance > > to get up from a chair but is able to walk unaided once he is on his > feet. > > Lately he is getting more unsteady and they are keeping a gait belt on > him > > and one aide beside him as he walks. He needs to be helped with dressing > > and undressing and toileting. They have him on a toilet every two hour > > schedule but he has some constant urine dribbling issues due to benign > > prostate enlargement. So he does wear adult pullup diapers. The Curative > > Workshop he attends has some people wheelchair bound and some more > > independent than Bob. > > > > You should visit the Adult Day Program in your area that you are > > considering and take a tour to examine it in person. Then you could ask > > them if they have any transportation available. The place my husband goes > > does have what they call a " morning wake-up service " where they send a > CNA > > to the home to shower and dress the patient and then a shuttle bus type > > vehicle will deliver them to the Center. That is another extra fee. I do > > not use that service so do not know that much about it. You can ask the > > place you are thinking about something like that. > > Good Luck, > > Pat M. > > > > > > > >> ** > > >> > >> > >> Hi Pat, > >> > >> Thank you for your response. I'm glad to hear Bob participated in a > >> program like this and it worked out nicely. I would hope my mom would > get > >> the supervision you describe was offered to bob. What stage of the > disease > >> was bob in when he participated in this recreation ? Could he still feed > >> himself ? > >> > >> The cost sounds reasonable.... I wonder if we could arrange moms > schedule > >> to go half a day for 2 days of the week. > >> > >> My thought is that this would give our 24 hour helper a break > >> instead of having someone else come in to care for mom several days a > week. > >> Getting mom together with others while giving some free time > >> would be well worth the funds. > >> > >> I wonder if would need to drop off mom or if they would > provide > >> some sort of transportation ? > >> > >> > >> Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > >> Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > >> > >> University of Phoenix > >> Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > >> Jersey City, NJ 07310 > >> Cell: > >> Email: Jrstr@... > >> > >> > >> On Jan 8, 2012, at 4:43 PM, Mayhew > wrote: > >> > >>> Hi Judy, > >>> My husband Bob goes to an Adult Day Center one day a week from 7:30 am > to > >>> 5:45pm and it is wonderful for both of us. He is well taken care of > there > >>> is an LPN there at all times with a CNA for every 6 patients or so. > They > >>> have excercises, games, activities, music, hot lunch and snacks. I > really > >>> look forward to that as my day off each week to do my shopping and > >>> appointments for myself. Other people do bring their LO daily and drop > >>> them off on the way to work. Here in Wisconsin they charge 60 dollars > per > >>> day. I don't know what the cost is for your area there. You would need > to > >>> see if you can justify the expense out of pocket as it is not covered > by > >>> Medicare or any insurance. If you or your Mom can afford it, I would > >>> recommend you go ahead with it on a trial basis to see how it works out > >> for > >>> your Mom. > >>> Best Wishes, > >>> Pat M. > >>> wife caregiver of Bob dx PD 2003, LBD 2009 > >>> > >>> On Sun, Jan 8, 2012 at 3:27 PM, Judy Strauss > wrote: > >>> > >>>> ** > >> > >>>> > >>>> > >>>> Hello friends, > >>>> > >>>> I was thinking of enrolling my mother in a recreation program at a > local > >>>> nursing home in moms neighborhood. > >>>> > >>>> Although she is in the late stages of LBD - She spends most of the day > >> in > >>>> the wheel chair watching tv - > >>>> > >>>> I am taking on more work now and long to see mom more socially > involved > >>>> with other people..... > >>>> > >>>> Has anyone enrolled a loved one in this kind of a program?? > >>>> > >>>> All advice or input will be appreciated. > >>>> > >>>> Thank you, > >>>> > >>>> Judy > >>>> > >>>> Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > >>>> Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > >>>> > >>>> University of Phoenix > >>>> Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > >>>> Jersey City, NJ 07310 > >>>> Cell: > >>>> Email: Jrstr@... > >>>> > >>>> > >>>> > >>>> > >>> > >>> > >>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 8, 2012 Report Share Posted January 8, 2012 Oh, Judy. Yes. Yes. Yes! Having Mom in daycare allow me to keep her home for more than a year extra. Even now, at the nursing home, we've started Mom in an exercise class because her legs get so restless. And she really enjoys kicking that huge ball around in their circle. When they have music, she even sings which is something she always said she couldn't do. And Mom is late stage, too. Obviously, I'm very enthusiastic about senior daycare and activity programs. Aside from her great grandson, programs like this keeps Mom 's life at a level above mere existence. Kathy Kate Knapp > ** > > > Hello friends, > > I was thinking of enrolling my mother in a recreation program at a local > nursing home in moms neighborhood. > > Although she is in the late stages of LBD - She spends most of the day in > the wheel chair watching tv - > > I am taking on more work now and long to see mom more socially involved > with other people..... > > Has anyone enrolled a loved one in this kind of a program?? > > All advice or input will be appreciated. > > Thank you, > > Judy > > Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > > University of Phoenix > Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > Jersey City, NJ 07310 > Cell: > Email: Jrstr@... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2012 Report Share Posted January 9, 2012 Hi Judy, Check with the Hebrew HOme for the Aged in Riverdale; they may have something. There was an article in the Times some years ago about a program offered at night for those that are awake at night and sleep by day. Helene in NY > > Hello friends, > > I was thinking of enrolling my mother in a recreation program at a local nursing home in moms neighborhood. > > Although she is in the late stages of LBD - She spends most of the day in the wheel chair watching tv - > > I am taking on more work now and long to see mom more socially involved with other people..... > > Has anyone enrolled a loved one in this kind of a program?? > > All advice or input will be appreciated. > > Thank you, > > Judy > > Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > > University of Phoenix > Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > Jersey City, NJ 07310 > Cell: > Email: Jrstr@... > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2012 Report Share Posted January 9, 2012 Judy,  You wouldn't find day care at the nh . You can check with some of the local churches or organizations. We had some here in MI also. But not at nh /s. If there is a local Alzheimers org there, they should be able to tell you where the day care are located.  And you pay what she can afford at most. I didn't know that but they had money and asked what Mom could afford. I had decided to put her in two days a week because it was all she could afford.  When I went in, they asked what she could afford and didn't even ask for proof of her income. We had a Catholic one here. But the Jewish one had one here also.  So sometimes they are religious based but you don't need to be of that faith.  Hope this helps.  Hugs,  Donna R Re: [ LBDcaregivers ] Re: Day programs ?  Hi pat, Janet and Helene Just spoke to the local nh in Washington heights where she lives and they do not offer day programs at all. Well, it sounded like a good idea. Judy R Strauss, LMSW , PhD Area Chair | College of Social Sciences University of Phoenix Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 Jersey City, NJ 07310 Cell: Email: Jrstr @email.phoenix. edu On Jan 9, 2012, at 10:20 AM, " hgm54 " < hgm54@... > wrote: > Hi Judy, > Check with the Hebrew HOme for the Aged in Riverdale ; they may have something. There was an article in the Times some years ago about a program offered at night for those that are awake at night and sleep by day. > > Helene in NY > > > > > > Hello friends, > > > > I was thinking of enrolling my mother in a recreation program at a local nursing home in moms neighborhood. > > > > Although she is in the late stages of LBD - She spends most of the day in the wheel chair watching tv - > > > > I am taking on more work now and long to see mom more socially involved with other people..... > > > > Has anyone enrolled a loved one in this kind of a program?? > > > > All advice or input will be appreciated. > > > > Thank you, > > > > Judy > > > > Judy R Strauss, LMSW , PhD > > Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > > > > University of Phoenix > > Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > > Jersey City, NJ 07310 > > Cell: > > Email: Jrstr @... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2012 Report Share Posted January 9, 2012 Dear Judy Just a different perspective, which I hope won't sound too negative ... My husband Jim went to a couple of day programs but after two 'outings' refused to go anymore. He said " I don't need to be with people who have nowhere to go to and no one to talk to " ! Jim was happiest in his own home environment. I used to use 'music therapy' a lot, playing relaxing classical CDs. He preferred it when I took him for little outings, when he was more mobile. I think he found the large number of 'strangers' in these day centres to be confusing and unsettling for him. A friend here in Sydney, whose husband also has LBD, has just had a similar experience with her husband rejecting the day centre idea. Elaine from Sydney Australia Carer for four years for husband Jim who died peacefully in hospital on 12th February 2011. Brain analysis, as a result of brain donation, has now confirmed the diagnosis of Diffuse Lewy Body Disease Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 9, 2012 Report Share Posted January 9, 2012 Hi Judy, I'm going to name some things my husband did at his Day Program. I don't know if it is the same where you are thinking of sending your mom. They never sat and watched TV, as I had my husband do at home, so I could get stuff done around the house and also to cook meals. They did watch a Video (movie) once a week. They did a lot of games with a ball or parachute. My husband loved the games that included a ball. They had music and sang songs, (not so much his cup of tea.) They did craft work and preschool level art, which was all that my husband could do. He could no longer paint or color within lines. In fact, he chose one color and stuck with it in whatever he colored. They did some ceramic painting, he loved to do this. I even got an idea from this, and went to a ceramic store at Easter and bought some unpainted ceramic bunnies and I let him paint them at home. He took brown paint and covered the bunnies in brown. I didn't have a Kiln, so I spray shellaced the bunnies and they look like edible chocolate bunnies. I put them out every Easter and they are good memories now to have of something my husband made when he had LBD. He had so much fun painting those bunnies, I will always have fond memories of that time. ________________________________ To: " LBDcaregivers " <LBDcaregivers > Sent: Monday, January 9, 2012 2:11 PM Subject: Re: Re: Day programs ? Hi Elaine, Thanks for the other side of the day care experience. I am still looking for one in her neighborhood that might work. My mom cannot communicate anymore and is completely put of it. I am not sure what she would make of the company at a day program but I'm having trouble seeing her spend all day watching tv. It's getting very depressing and I cannot believe we are going into another year with her like this. I appreciate your insight , Judy Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD Area Chair | College of Social Sciences University of Phoenix Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 Jersey City, NJ 07310 Cell:  Email: Jrstr@... > Dear Judy > > Just a different perspective, which I hope won't sound too negative ... > > My husband Jim went to a couple of day programs but after two 'outings' > refused to go anymore. He said " I don't need to be with people who have > nowhere to go to and no one to talk to " ! Jim was happiest in his own home > environment. I used to use 'music therapy' a lot, playing relaxing classical > CDs. He preferred it when I took him for little outings, when he was more > mobile. I think he found the large number of 'strangers' in these day > centres to be confusing and unsettling for him. > > A friend here in Sydney, whose husband also has LBD, has just had a similar > experience with her husband rejecting the day centre idea. > > Elaine from Sydney Australia > > Carer for four years for husband Jim who died peacefully in hospital on 12th > February 2011. > > Brain analysis, as a result of brain donation, has now confirmed the > diagnosis of Diffuse Lewy Body Disease > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 10, 2012 Report Share Posted January 10, 2012 Dear Judy, You said it just right - feeling like you are going to collapse from sadness.... that is exactly how it feels.... Helene in NY > > > > > Dear Judy > > > > > > Just a different perspective, which I hope won't sound too negative ... > > > > > > My husband Jim went to a couple of day programs but after two 'outings' > > > refused to go anymore. He said " I don't need to be with people who have > > > nowhere to go to and no one to talk to " ! Jim was happiest in his own home > > > environment. I used to use 'music therapy' a lot, playing relaxing classical > > > CDs. He preferred it when I took him for little outings, when he was more > > > mobile. I think he found the large number of 'strangers' in these day > > > centres to be confusing and unsettling for him. > > > > > > A friend here in Sydney, whose husband also has LBD, has just had a similar > > > experience with her husband rejecting the day centre idea. > > > > > > Elaine from Sydney Australia > > > > > > Carer for four years for husband Jim who died peacefully in hospital on 12th > > > February 2011. > > > > > > Brain analysis, as a result of brain donation, has now confirmed the > > > diagnosis of Diffuse Lewy Body Disease > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 10, 2012 Report Share Posted January 10, 2012 Don't give up on the idea of daycare, Judy. Our experience was very much like Jan's. But I'll add to it. We started Mom out with half days, as it was summer and my sister is a teacher so she could be with Mom the rest of the time. But when fall came, we had Mom at daycare for full days, 5 days a week. We had to. I had to work and keep a roof over our heads. At that time, Mom was pretty limited in her vocabulary and didn't talk much. That was OK. There were a lot of talkers there and they appreciated a listener who didn't interrupt them. Mom also needed a daily nap. They had a " quiet " room where there were a couple of couches and several recliners. The rule was that the lights stayed dim and no one talked. The staff made sure that Mom got her nap every day. Mom also needed PT and, later, individual exercise (aside from the exercise group). A staff member would take her through her exercises daily. Things got to a point where Mom would get upset when I took a day off and kept her home. She began to think of daycare as a place where her job was and would be worried about missing work. Even though she was exhausted after 9 hours there every day, it became part of her identity, as much and any career does. Over the year + that Mom was in daycare, it became harder for her to use her walker and the staff helped with the transition to the wheelchair. They would call to check up on us when Mom missed a day because she was ill and I forgot to call them. I will always be a proponent of senior daycare. You just have to select the one you use very carefully. Kate > ** > > > Hi Jan, > > Your post here is very touching - recalling what your husband did at the > day program, the ceramic work, the ceramic bunnies, his coloring and not > being able to color in the lines - > > Jan, your loving attitude brings tears to my eyes. It's heartbreaking what > we endure with our loved ones with this disease. It's nice to see how you > handles this all with love. > > Some days I think I'm going to collapse from sadness....and the inevitable > decline.....its all so hopeless....scares me about growing old myself..... > > Thanks for sharing, > > > Judy > > Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > > University of Phoenix > Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > Jersey City, NJ 07310 > Cell: > Email: Jrstr@... > > > > > > Hi Judy, > > I'm going to name some things my husband did at his Day Program. I don't > know if it is the same where you are thinking of sending your mom. They > never sat and watched TV, as I had my husband do at home, so I could get > stuff done around the house and also to cook meals. They did watch a Video > (movie) once a week. They did a lot of games with a ball or parachute. My > husband loved the games that included a ball. They had music and sang > songs, (not so much his cup of tea.) They did craft work and preschool > level art, which was all that my husband could do. He could no longer paint > or color within lines. In fact, he chose one color and stuck with it in > whatever he colored. They did some ceramic painting, he loved to do this. I > even got an idea from this, and went to a ceramic store at Easter and > bought some unpainted ceramic bunnies and I let him paint them at home. He > took brown paint and covered the bunnies in brown. I didn't have a Kiln, so > I spray > > shellaced the bunnies and they look like edible chocolate bunnies. I put > them out every Easter and they are good memories now to have of something > my husband made when he had LBD. He had so much fun painting those bunnies, > I will always have fond memories of that time. > > > > ________________________________ > > > > To: " LBDcaregivers " <LBDcaregivers > > > Sent: Monday, January 9, 2012 2:11 PM > > Subject: Re: Re: Day programs ? > > > > Hi Elaine, > > > > Thanks for the other side of the day care experience. I am still looking > for one in her neighborhood that might work. > > > > My mom cannot communicate anymore and is completely put of it. I am not > sure what she would make of the company at a day program but I'm having > trouble seeing her spend all day watching tv. > > > > It's getting very depressing and I cannot believe we are going into > another year with her like this. > > > > I appreciate your insight , > > > > Judy > > > > Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD > > Area Chair | College of Social Sciences > > > > University of Phoenix > > Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 > > Jersey City, NJ 07310 > > Cell: > > Email: Jrstr@... > > > > On Jan 9, 2012, at 4:57 PM, " Elaine Elliott " > wrote: > > > > > Dear Judy > > > > > > Just a different perspective, which I hope won't sound too negative ... > > > > > > My husband Jim went to a couple of day programs but after two 'outings' > > > refused to go anymore. He said " I don't need to be with people who have > > > nowhere to go to and no one to talk to " ! Jim was happiest in his own > home > > > environment. I used to use 'music therapy' a lot, playing relaxing > classical > > > CDs. He preferred it when I took him for little outings, when he was > more > > > mobile. I think he found the large number of 'strangers' in these day > > > centres to be confusing and unsettling for him. > > > > > > A friend here in Sydney, whose husband also has LBD, has just had a > similar > > > experience with her husband rejecting the day centre idea. > > > > > > Elaine from Sydney Australia > > > > > > Carer for four years for husband Jim who died peacefully in hospital > on 12th > > > February 2011. > > > > > > Brain analysis, as a result of brain donation, has now confirmed the > > > diagnosis of Diffuse Lewy Body Disease > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 10, 2012 Report Share Posted January 10, 2012 Oh, and they did memory exercises: word games, where were you when.., even colors, numbers and letters. > Don't give up on the idea of daycare, Judy. Our experience was very much > like Jan's. But I'll add to it. > > We started Mom out with half days, as it was summer and my sister is a > teacher so she could be with Mom the rest of the time. But when fall came, > we had Mom at daycare for full days, 5 days a week. We had to. I had to > work and keep a roof over our heads. > > At that time, Mom was pretty limited in her vocabulary and didn't talk > much. That was OK. There were a lot of talkers there and they appreciated > a listener who didn't interrupt them. Mom also needed a daily nap. They > had a " quiet " room where there were a couple of couches and several > recliners. The rule was that the lights stayed dim and no one talked. The > staff made sure that Mom got her nap every day. > > Mom also needed PT and, later, individual exercise (aside from the > exercise group). A staff member would take her through her exercises daily. > > Things got to a point where Mom would get upset when I took a day off and > kept her home. She began to think of daycare as a place where her job was > and would be worried about missing work. Even though she was exhausted > after 9 hours there every day, it became part of her identity, as much and > any career does. > > Over the year + that Mom was in daycare, it became harder for her to use > her walker and the staff helped with the transition to the wheelchair. > They would call to check up on us when Mom missed a day because she was ill > and I forgot to call them. > > I will always be a proponent of senior daycare. You just have to select > the one you use very carefully. > > Kate > > > > > > >> ** >> >> >> Hi Jan, >> >> Your post here is very touching - recalling what your husband did at the >> day program, the ceramic work, the ceramic bunnies, his coloring and not >> being able to color in the lines - >> >> Jan, your loving attitude brings tears to my eyes. It's heartbreaking >> what we endure with our loved ones with this disease. It's nice to see how >> you handles this all with love. >> >> Some days I think I'm going to collapse from sadness....and the >> inevitable decline.....its all so hopeless....scares me about growing old >> myself..... >> >> Thanks for sharing, >> >> >> Judy >> >> Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD >> Area Chair | College of Social Sciences >> >> University of Phoenix >> Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 >> Jersey City, NJ 07310 >> Cell: >> Email: Jrstr@... >> >> >> >> >> > Hi Judy, >> > I'm going to name some things my husband did at his Day Program. I >> don't know if it is the same where you are thinking of sending your mom. >> They never sat and watched TV, as I had my husband do at home, so I could >> get stuff done around the house and also to cook meals. They did watch a >> Video (movie) once a week. They did a lot of games with a ball or >> parachute. My husband loved the games that included a ball. They had music >> and sang songs, (not so much his cup of tea.) They did craft work and >> preschool level art, which was all that my husband could do. He could no >> longer paint or color within lines. In fact, he chose one color and stuck >> with it in whatever he colored. They did some ceramic painting, he loved to >> do this. I even got an idea from this, and went to a ceramic store at >> Easter and bought some unpainted ceramic bunnies and I let him paint them >> at home. He took brown paint and covered the bunnies in brown. I didn't >> have a Kiln, so I spray >> > shellaced the bunnies and they look like edible chocolate bunnies. I >> put them out every Easter and they are good memories now to have of >> something my husband made when he had LBD. He had so much fun painting >> those bunnies, I will always have fond memories of that time. >> > >> > ________________________________ >> > >> > To: " LBDcaregivers " <LBDcaregivers > >> > Sent: Monday, January 9, 2012 2:11 PM >> > Subject: Re: Re: Day programs ? >> > >> > Hi Elaine, >> > >> > Thanks for the other side of the day care experience. I am still >> looking for one in her neighborhood that might work. >> > >> > My mom cannot communicate anymore and is completely put of it. I am not >> sure what she would make of the company at a day program but I'm having >> trouble seeing her spend all day watching tv. >> > >> > It's getting very depressing and I cannot believe we are going into >> another year with her like this. >> > >> > I appreciate your insight , >> > >> > Judy >> > >> > Judy R Strauss, LMSW, PhD >> > Area Chair | College of Social Sciences >> > >> > University of Phoenix >> > Jersey City Campus | 100 Town Square Place | Suite 305 >> > Jersey City, NJ 07310 >> > Cell: >> > Email: Jrstr@... >> > >> > On Jan 9, 2012, at 4:57 PM, " Elaine Elliott " >> wrote: >> > >> > > Dear Judy >> > > >> > > Just a different perspective, which I hope won't sound too negative >> ... >> > > >> > > My husband Jim went to a couple of day programs but after two >> 'outings' >> > > refused to go anymore. He said " I don't need to be with people who >> have >> > > nowhere to go to and no one to talk to " ! Jim was happiest in his own >> home >> > > environment. I used to use 'music therapy' a lot, playing relaxing >> classical >> > > CDs. He preferred it when I took him for little outings, when he was >> more >> > > mobile. I think he found the large number of 'strangers' in these day >> > > centres to be confusing and unsettling for him. >> > > >> > > A friend here in Sydney, whose husband also has LBD, has just had a >> similar >> > > experience with her husband rejecting the day centre idea. >> > > >> > > Elaine from Sydney Australia >> > > >> > > Carer for four years for husband Jim who died peacefully in hospital >> on 12th >> > > February 2011. >> > > >> > > Brain analysis, as a result of brain donation, has now confirmed the >> > > diagnosis of Diffuse Lewy Body Disease >> > > >> > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 10, 2012 Report Share Posted January 10, 2012 Dear Judy, and all, All your posts are so full of love in spite of all the sadness and difficulties you all endure. Yes, sadness seems everywhere lately. In addition to my mom with Lewy Body, my brother is " end-stage renal failure " . He traveled several hours to see our mother on Sunday whom he hasn't seen in quite a while. He barely made it, and the reunion was heartwarming but also heart wrenching. I don't think my brother has long. I also have a sister and nephew who lived with my mom and who depended on them their whole lives - both with a myriad of problems. At this point they are monthly on the verge of homelessness, despite many people intervening. I have withdrawn from my sister's and nephew's lives for self survival the last few months having come to the realization that they must want help to get better themselves. - one of the most difficult things I've ever done. All our siblings convened this week-end to discuss funeral arrangments for our mom (she always refused to discuss death) and it was the first time in probably 10 years that we have all been together. In the midst of all this pain, it was a beautiful evening. It is my belief and faith in God or Source or whatever you want to call it that keeps me going. (Of course I do not push my beliefs on anyone else.) I feel this loving presence strongly in my life despite the pain and suffering. I have to believe that there is more to these struggles than we humans can comprehend. Sending loving strength to all of you that this terrible disease has brought together as you face your daily burdens as well. Marcie _____ From: LBDcaregivers [mailto:LBDcaregivers ] On Behalf Of hgm54 Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 1:11 PM To: LBDcaregivers Subject: Re: Day programs ? Dear Judy, You said it just right - feeling like you are going to collapse from sadness.... that is exactly how it feels.... Helene in NY > > > > > Dear Judy > > > > > > Just a different perspective, which I hope won't sound too negative .... > > > > > > My husband Jim went to a couple of day programs but after two 'outings' > > > refused to go anymore. He said " I don't need to be with people who have > > > nowhere to go to and no one to talk to " ! Jim was happiest in his own home > > > environment. I used to use 'music therapy' a lot, playing relaxing classical > > > CDs. He preferred it when I took him for little outings, when he was more > > > mobile. I think he found the large number of 'strangers' in these day > > > centres to be confusing and unsettling for him. > > > > > > A friend here in Sydney, whose husband also has LBD, has just had a similar > > > experience with her husband rejecting the day centre idea. > > > > > > Elaine from Sydney Australia > > > > > > Carer for four years for husband Jim who died peacefully in hospital on 12th > > > February 2011. > > > > > > Brain analysis, as a result of brain donation, has now confirmed the > > > diagnosis of Diffuse Lewy Body Disease > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 10, 2012 Report Share Posted January 10, 2012 Dear Marcie, You certainly have a lot on your plate... I don't know how you manage to deal with all the emotions. Will send up good thoughts and prayers for you, your brother, your Mom, and the rest of your family. Sending strength and hugs from NY, Helene > > > > > > > Dear Judy > > > > > > > > Just a different perspective, which I hope won't sound too negative > ... > > > > > > > > My husband Jim went to a couple of day programs but after two > 'outings' > > > > refused to go anymore. He said " I don't need to be with people who > have > > > > nowhere to go to and no one to talk to " ! Jim was happiest in his own > home > > > > environment. I used to use 'music therapy' a lot, playing relaxing > classical > > > > CDs. He preferred it when I took him for little outings, when he was > more > > > > mobile. I think he found the large number of 'strangers' in these day > > > > centres to be confusing and unsettling for him. > > > > > > > > A friend here in Sydney, whose husband also has LBD, has just had a > similar > > > > experience with her husband rejecting the day centre idea. > > > > > > > > Elaine from Sydney Australia > > > > > > > > Carer for four years for husband Jim who died peacefully in hospital > on 12th > > > > February 2011. > > > > > > > > Brain analysis, as a result of brain donation, has now confirmed the > > > > diagnosis of Diffuse Lewy Body Disease > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 11, 2012 Report Share Posted January 11, 2012 Dear Helene, Thank you for the kind words. I think everyone on this website is experiencing the same emotions just different circumstances. Sending hugs back to you. Marcie _____ From: LBDcaregivers [mailto:LBDcaregivers ] On Behalf Of hgm54 Sent: Tuesday, January 10, 2012 9:02 PM To: LBDcaregivers Subject: Re: Day programs ? Dear Marcie, You certainly have a lot on your plate... I don't know how you manage to deal with all the emotions. Will send up good thoughts and prayers for you, your brother, your Mom, and the rest of your family. Sending strength and hugs from NY, Helene > > > > > > > Dear Judy > > > > > > > > Just a different perspective, which I hope won't sound too negative > ... > > > > > > > > My husband Jim went to a couple of day programs but after two > 'outings' > > > > refused to go anymore. He said " I don't need to be with people who > have > > > > nowhere to go to and no one to talk to " ! Jim was happiest in his own > home > > > > environment. I used to use 'music therapy' a lot, playing relaxing > classical > > > > CDs. He preferred it when I took him for little outings, when he was > more > > > > mobile. I think he found the large number of 'strangers' in these day > > > > centres to be confusing and unsettling for him. > > > > > > > > A friend here in Sydney, whose husband also has LBD, has just had a > similar > > > > experience with her husband rejecting the day centre idea. > > > > > > > > Elaine from Sydney Australia > > > > > > > > Carer for four years for husband Jim who died peacefully in hospital > on 12th > > > > February 2011. > > > > > > > > Brain analysis, as a result of brain donation, has now confirmed the > > > > diagnosis of Diffuse Lewy Body Disease > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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