Liberal use of expletives -- beware the rant.

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 1/11/2002 5:54:11 PM Eastern Standard Time,

vhunnius@... writes:

> A few months ago there was a town in California for sale...

well the mind institute is there and all ... what do you say everyone LETS GO

!

[Guest guest]

Grace, I can't believe you're offering Sydney. I thought Madison was more

severe? Or are you trying for both and Jacquie just lucked out? LOL Did

Sydney just do something to get into your bad graces.

Funny!!

Tamara

----Original Message Follows----

Reply-To: parenting_autism

To: <parenting_autism >

Subject: Re: Liberal use of expletives -- beware the

rant.

Date: Sat, 12 Jan 2002 00:02:26 -0800

>Thanks, Grace. I do keep in mind how far he's come; unfortunately, after

this holiday I had it TOO MUCH in mind, and forgot that nobody on the

>outside can see what we see. It was a shock.

Jacquie,

Yea.

But then again, they can't know. They don't know from where he began. So

they can't possibly know how far he's come.

IDEA: I think you should adopt Sydney. Then you can point to her, and say

" This boy was like this 2 years ago. " Then point to him and say, 'Lookie

how much better. "

What do you think? Free shipping?

She has even learned how to sign CANDY today!!!!? She eats tacos, and she

can do LOTS of cool things like tap head, rub wall, stomp feet, clap hands,

touch nose, point, and pat lap to the command, " DO THIS " . Talented, I tell

you. Extremely sweet... except when she is flinging food across the room

off the spoon, onto brand new dining chairs. And - - - - the best part?

She doesn't talk back. Ever.

So how about it?

Grace

_________________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

> She has even learned how to sign CANDY today!!!!?

That's FABULOUS!!!! How many signs does she use now??? What a RELIEF that must

be to finally know something she WANTS!!!

>And - - - - the best part?

> She doesn't talk back. Ever.

> So how about it?

Only if we can do an even trade - Syd for . He could use some sun...

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

> Sounds like they need to get a social skills group going with 's class.

> Are they open to that idea?

>

> Pam

I'll ask, Pam - it's a good idea - but I think I can tell you their answer:

" They're too young " . :-(

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

--- In parenting_autism@y..., " The Hunny Family " <vhunnius@l...> > He

spied a kid in his class. " CODY!!!! " he shrieked, and ran

over. " Look what I'm wearing!!! " He flashed the coat open to show

the vest. No reaction from Cody whatsoever. He did the same to

, , Kayla, and . No reaction whatsoever. They

IGNORED him. Dale, when apprehended, actually VEERED around him

without even looking at him.

YUCK.

>

> Then , his old and trusty standby arrived. I guess he'd

figured out he was going about this wrong, because he looked at the

hat was holding in her hands and said, " I like that hat. What

colour is that hat, ? " NO FUCKING REACTION WHATSOEVER. She

just stared at the hat, and then slowly put it on her head without a

word. Not one fucking word.

This is very strange and heartbreaking indeed.

>

> What the hell is going on???? ONE kid, I could understand. It's a

grey yucky day. BUT ALL OF THEM????? What the fuck is going on???

>

> Unfortunately, I think I KNOW what's going on. He's different.

He's annoying. He's pushy. They don't like him. THEY DON'T LIKE

HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They don't have any frigging idea how hard he

works to talk to them. They don't have any frigging idea of what a

miracle he is. They can't see the wonderful things about him because

they've gotten fed up with the surface of him -- the one that he

needs to cope in their world. And their mothers can't either, the

mothers can't have any freaking clue, or wouldn't they encourage

their kids to at least treat him CIVILLY??????? Wouldn't YOU????

Yes, the kids should be taught to treat him with civility. They

should learn to do that with everyone except perhaps idiots who ask

us why we can't make our autistic children do something or other.

>

> You know, I don't expect him to be invited to birthday parties.

Sad but true. I don't expect him to be invited to playdates. Sad

but true. But I DO expect him to be treated with a little KINDNESS,

for Pete's Fucking Sake!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes!

>

> I WANT TO GO BACK TO OUR HOME PLANET, DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

>

Will you take Enrique with you? Putter is doing okay at the moment.

Sorry, Jacquie, for this. It sounds upsetting. The better he gets

the worse the problem will be because he will care. Putter does not

care. Not yet. And I must hope that he will one day care, even

though it will probably hurt him when and if he loses his autistic

protection. It's so sad; for him to get better he must get hurt.

Yuck.

Salli

[Guest guest]

....and if they ARE open to it, PLEASE tell me how they go about it!!!

I've never seen people side-step an idea so much in my life (at Jacqui's

school anyway)

Penny

Re: Liberal use of expletives -- beware the

rant.

Sounds like they need to get a social skills group going with 's class.

Are they open to that idea?

Pam

Mom to and Conor

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 1/12/02 1:09:09 PM Eastern Standard Time,

nospam@... writes:

> I've never seen people side-step an idea so much in my life (at Jacqui's

> school anyway)

>

> Penny

>

>

The way I've seen the groups run before is by the speech therapist or at

least with her input. It would involve working on a project together,

reading a story together and taking turns asking and answering

questions...but I guess Jacqui is right they probably are too young, unless

they just do it 1:1.

Pam

Mom to and Conor

Check out our webpage!

<A HREF= " http://www.geocities.com/oceangirl65/index.html " >Yahoo! GeoCities -

oceangirl65's Home Page</A>

[Guest guest]

---snip---

well the mind institute is there and all ... what do you say everyone LETS GO

---snip---

I'm not sure about this. Actually I'm developing paranoid feelings about this.

The Mind Institute is somehow connected with UC . Both my husband and I

graduated from UCD. We have an autistic child. Another friend of mine lived on

campus for a few years while her husband was at school there. They have two

autistic children. Another friend, she was my roommate, had a child with some

sort of behavioral issue. I forget what, and I've kind of lost touch with her.

I'm beginning to wonder what kinds of experiments UCD was conducting there

during the late 80's. Or maybe it was the water. Nasty tasting stuff.

Just kidding, kind of.

Janae

, 9, ADD

Jake, 6, autism

[Guest guest]

Yup, I know.....It is an awful feeling for a parent...I read Sue's suggestion,

and agree.

Kerri

Liberal use of expletives -- beware the ran

What a heartbreaking morning.

got dressed by himself for school, chose his own clothes and everything.

He was VERY excited, because he was wearing this vest that his Oma and Opa gave

him. He's never worn it out before.

So we got to school on this rainy, grey morning. His coat was flapping open;

he wouldn't let me do up the zip.

He spied a kid in his class. " CODY!!!! " he shrieked, and ran over. " Look

what I'm wearing!!! " He flashed the coat open to show the vest. No reaction

from Cody whatsoever. He did the same to , , Kayla, and . No

reaction whatsoever. They IGNORED him. Dale, when apprehended, actually VEERED

around him without even looking at him.

Then , his old and trusty standby arrived. I guess he'd figured out he

was going about this wrong, because he looked at the hat was holding in

her hands and said, " I like that hat. What colour is that hat, ? " NO

FUCKING REACTION WHATSOEVER. She just stared at the hat, and then slowly put it

on her head without a word. Not one fucking word.

What the hell is going on???? ONE kid, I could understand. It's a grey yucky

day. BUT ALL OF THEM????? What the fuck is going on???

Unfortunately, I think I KNOW what's going on. He's different. He's

annoying. He's pushy. They don't like him. THEY DON'T LIKE

HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! They don't have any frigging idea how hard he works to talk

to them. They don't have any frigging idea of what a miracle he is. They can't

see the wonderful things about him because they've gotten fed up with the

surface of him -- the one that he needs to cope in their world. And their

mothers can't either, the mothers can't have any freaking clue, or wouldn't they

encourage their kids to at least treat him CIVILLY??????? Wouldn't YOU????

You know, I don't expect him to be invited to birthday parties. Sad but true.

I don't expect him to be invited to playdates. Sad but true. But I DO expect

him to be treated with a little KINDNESS, for Pete's Fucking Sake!!!!!!!!!!!

I can handle life cheating me out of my dreams and expectations. I'm strong.

But how DARE life cheat this denfenseless, INNOCENT child out of the friendship

of even ONE kid??? Out of even THIS common childhood experience? Hasn't he

already been set on the sidelines enough???? Where is the justice in THAT?

Where is the 'test' in that? Where is the basic human fucking decency in THAT?

He has come so far in the last weeks. He has made strides and leaps that have

astounded me, given me hope, given me strength and joy and peace...but

apparently no one else can see it.

I didn't REALIZE how isolated we were, how insulated, how sheltered by our

home and our family and the wonderful life we lead within these walls. I didn't

realize that even now, after all these amazing things we've seen recently, all

the work we've done, all the joy it's brought, we are STILL a chunk of alien

life, safe in the space of the alien atmosphere of our base camp, vulnerable and

bizarre outside of it -- we may adapt to outside life, but we will never be

accepted as part of the earth race. We will always be strikingly different. We

will never assimilate.

I WANT TO GO BACK TO OUR HOME PLANET, DAMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jacquie

[Guest guest]

> Grace, I can't believe you're offering Sydney. I thought Madison was more

> severe? Or are you trying for both and Jacquie just lucked out? LOL

Did

> Sydney just do something to get into your bad graces.

> Funny!!

> Tamara

Tamara.

I change my mind as of this second.

I take back the offer of Syd and offer Madison. She is REALLY bothering me.

In fact, I feel generous. Take them both.

Anyone. Not just Jacquie.

breathe in.... breathe out.... breathe in.... breathe out.

Grace

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