Re: Re: Deb's back and my prince charming

[Guest guest]

Hi hun.. I know what you mean about the prince charming thing. I have been divorced about 10 months.(best thing I could do for me) I have dated a few men since... 1st was Greg a parapeligic. He was so sweet and understand. We had a special bond between us... both being disabled. He took the time to look up RSD and to help me deal with this awful disease. We broke after being together for about 2 minths. At this time, he was very discouraged with his life and decidd to go to a school out of state. This hurt me tremendously. Not because he was moving but that we wouldnt be abled to see one another. I still have feelings for him, but if he needed to take this road, in order to better himself mentally and vocationally. (He was a construction worker before he had the car wreck that robbed him of the use of his legs.) As a matter of fact Im still in love with him and probably will for a long long time. Then there was (yes a man named ) lol he was a nice guy,a great father to his 2 year old son. He owns his own business too. But I had been not following my heart. There were to many things about him that I didnt like. For example, he was predudice. And I heard him say the "N" word to many times and I made my skin crawl.. There were 2 things that finally made me leave. !st he was teaching him that black people were "N"s. I think its disgusting. To teach a child stuff like that. They were watching TV when his son heard the"n" word come from his daddy. He said daddy is that a "N"? He said "yes son that's a "N" I lost all respect for him then... And he was also jealous type..would question me everytime I went out with friends. Always asking if I had been with anyone (sexually) Well I finally said " why do you always do this to me?" We had been together exclusively for about 6 months...His answer was... because if you are having sex with anyone else I dont want to catch anything...JERK!!! I complained about this stressing me out.. he said if I didnt like the situation, I could get out now.... So now he's spending his time alone. I cannot change his opinion or the way he was raised or his actions....he will die a lonely old man if he doesnt start thinking about someone besides himself. Alot of the RSD got on his nerves too. We need someone that would be able to be there for us RSD Patients.. And if your own boyfriend wants to deny it is there... then he never will understand it.

now Im on my own.. but I have been going out on a few dates... I just want to have some fun and to find mysellf again. The man I have a date with is cool.. doesnt care that Im on crutches or a wheelchair.. he said its whats on the inside that counts. who knows what wil happen, we are taking this thing REALLY SLOW.

I guess what Im saying is that under every Prince Charming... there may be a toad kissing you. We never really know until we try. Dont let this get you down. Because when you are looking for your prince... he's hard to find. But if you just live your life.. he'll sneak up on you when you least expect it. Good luck.. But remember....you cannot change someone else.

hugzzz Sheila

Deborah J Holt wrote: Hi Deb,I didn't know you were that bad off these days! I really wish there wassomething the doctors could do to help you. I was doing some research onthe Net yesterday and came across the Mensana Clinic with an article onRSD written by Dr. Hendler. Most of what he said I agree with. His clinic is in son land. Is that anywhere close to you? Have you ever heard of him or the clinic? He quotes many of the doctorswho have written articles on pain management I have found on the net andis affiliated with RSDSA. The web address for this article iswww.painend.com/articles/rsd_clearing.htm and is worth reading. Hasanyone else here ever seen this doctor? I am still looking for atreating physician as I don't really have one. My attorney is being awimp and not helping out at all with this issue. I guess I will have tocontact the Attorney General's office since they are representing theUninsured Employer's Fund and see how to go about getting to a new doctorwithout one to make a referral. Most of the doctors here in Tidewaterhave already done all they can and have referred me elsewhere. I eventried to get back to the one that misdiagnosed me before for treatmentbut she refused to see me. Her partner is supposed to be good but hewon't see me because I used to be the other doctor's patient. My familyphysician moved back to Canada so I am really out in the cold heremedically speaking. I have a psychiatrist writing my pain meds and apodiatrist and plastic surgeon getting ready for the upcoming surgeriesand then I will be released by them also. Anyway, if this doctor isclose to you he sounds as though he is worth checking out.As far as my prince charming, he is charming but I am not sure about theprince part. There are things he does that really bother me like when wego out to eat, he orders first. He never opens my car door for me andeven after getting shots into my RSD ankle he was too tired to drive formore than 1/2 hour on the way home. He seems to always put himself firstand at times it even seems he goes out of his way to prove howunimportant I am too him. Maybe I am looking at this wrong and justdon't understand why he does what he does. He is a recovering drugaddict and alcoholic and I don't understand the 12 step program, don'treally know anything about it as I have never had to go that route. Ihave been strong enough to drop cigarettes in the trash after smoking 2 -3 packs per day for 5 years and never smoke again. Not that I don't wantto, the desire is still here at times, even after quitting 16 years ago,but I refuse to smoke. He also lost his eye back in April and is dealingwith that. I know his life has changed drastically recently and he isn'ta strong person to begin with as he resorted to alcohol and heroin toescape everyday normal life before this tragedy. When I stop and thinkabout us and our situation I think he is all wrong for me and for my son.But I do love him and enjoy spending time with him, except for hissmoking. Guess time will tell.As far as my pain level goes, I have been trying to make it through theday without oxycontin but I just can't do it. My leg below the knee isreally pinging now, feels like it feels when you bump your funny bone andget that hot tingling shooting pain. It hurts to wear shoes and I can'tfind a pair that feels comfortable these days so I have been spending alot of time at home in slippers or socks. I am having surgery Thursdayto have the neuroma in my calf taken care of. This is where the suralnerve was severed and removed in 93. He is also going to go into myankle where my RSD originates to look for nerve tissue that wasmistakenly left behind. In a way I am very excited to finally be havingthis done and on the other hand I am really scared. I know the risksinvolved and I know how difficult rehab is after having a nerve severed. This surgery will probably change the course of the rest of my life, forbetter or worse. Sounds like marriage!! My back is also hurtingterribly and I keep getting muscle spasms under my right shoulder bladethat wrap around to the front making it painful to breathe. This is fromthe car accident and I guess I need to go back to that ortho for asteroid injection. He mentioned the possibility of more surgery and Idecided to stay away from him for now.Hope your doctors find some way to help you Deb and that you feel bettersoon. Do what you feel is right for you and hang in there.Take care, Debbie/DJ________________________________________________________________GET INTERNET ACCESS FROM JUNO!Juno offers FREE or PREMIUM Internet access for less!Join Juno today! For your FREE software, visit:http://dl.www.juno.com/get/web/.

[Guest guest]

Sheila, You are so strong to stand beside your morals. The last guy sounded lie a real jerk and I know he and I would never had made it either. After all you have been through in you life, (more than me at least and my childhood was pretty bad), you deserve the very best. He will come.

Hugs and a pain free minute,

Deb

Deborah Genatossio

Debgena@...

"Hope is a thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without words and never stops at all "

Dickinson

PLEASE NOTE THE FOLLOWING WAIVER

______________________________________________________________________

No advise given by any member of this group is to be misconstrued as a reason to start, stop or add anything to your treatment plan including medications and procedures recommended by your physician.

We are not responsible for any advise given and used in anyway against your doctors advise. Please check with all the people treating your condition before attempting to try anything new. Thanks.

Deb, Jo and Felice

listowners

RSD-CRPS

[Guest guest]

hi... again we have something in common. My childhood wasnt great either. My mom spent alot of time in and out of the hopsital. With one surgery after another..hysterectomy, and several cancer scares with exploritory surgeries. My dad could handle it when she got sick. And started telling everyone that she was a hypocondriac. I was about 7 when this all started, my brother was 8 and sister was 10. My sister was taking over at that young age..cooking and trying to take care of my mom and me and our brother (ill never touch another tv dinner or pot pie again, hehe) My dad was to busy drowning in his self pity and beer. He remained and alcoholic, but stopped drinking when i was 17. He quit cold turkey and hasnt drank since. But he did alot of damage in those 10 of being drunk. He was abusive towards my mom, thinking somehow that everything was her fault. Anyway about a month after my dad quit drinking he was at work and hit a high voltage power line with an uluminum ladder. He was hospitalized for three months in a burn ward in San Diego. He lost all his toes and a finger and the use of his left hand. I was the only child of 3 that graduated from high school. And he got appenisitis on my graduation day so he missed the ceremony and went into surgery to remove his appendix, which had gang green ( not so sure on the spelling but it sounds like I spelled it) My brother and sister ran away constantly to get away from him. when we were young. Mom went to work when dad got hurt.. he wouldnt let her work before. And me being the only kid still in the house had to help with him when he fot home from the hospital... I was allowed to get out of school at lunch time to take care of him till mom got home. Then I went back to school at night to get caught up and so I could graduate with my class...which I did. well to make a longer story short... lets see.. mom was sick alot, dad got electricuted. My brother rolled his truck on a foggy night and flew through the camper on his truck, cutting off both his ears and leaving him with scars on his face, that he covers with a beard. Then my brother got shot with his own gun...while traeling. It fell out the door of his truck and shot him in the leg. but he's ok now. My sister was murdered by her abusive husband. And then I got RSD... sounds like this family should have their own hospital hehe. Things are ok now...except for the complete denial that dad and brother are in about my disease...but I have learned to live with that. I guess every family ha its problems... anyway hugzzz to everone Sheila

debgena@... wrote: Sheila, You are so strong to stand beside your morals. The last guy sounded lie a real jerk and I know he and I would never had made it either. After all you have been through in you life, (more than me at least and my childhood was pretty bad), you deserve the very best. He will come. Hugs and a pain free minute, Deb Deborah Genatossio Debgena@... "Hope is a thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tune without words and never stops at all " Dickinson PLEASE NOTE THE FOLLOWING WAIVER ______________________________________________________________________ No advise given by any member of this group is to be misconstrued as a reason to start, stop or add anything to your treatment plan including medications and procedures recommended by your physician. We are not responsible for any advise given and used in anyway against your doctors advise. Please check with all the people treating your condition before attempting to try anything new. Thanks. Deb, Jo and Felice listowners RSD-CRPS

[Guest guest]

Holy shi*!!! man, that sounds like a very rough childhood! And then to be cursed with this crap. Where does it say that if you have a rough childhood, you should have a rough adulthood?? Geesh

Tonia Conyers

tonia197426@...

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[Guest guest]

haha thanks Tonya.. your reaction to my childhood... it started me laughing so hard I thought I was gonna fall outta my seat. I wasnt expecting that. :-)My childhood did one good thing to me.. made me strong so that I could handle this RSD crap. Im doing good now..I have just stopped seeing my dad and my brother. Although I love them dearly I cant stomach being around them cause Im always afraid that they will turn on me any chance the get. October 1st was the anniversary of my sister's death. She was killed by her husband, who then killed myself. October is domestic violence month and we will be having a candlelight nidual at mom's house on the lake... There is a beautiful 8 foot memorial there in honor of my sister. It has a picture engraved on it's front of her hugging her dog ( she was a professional dog handler and showed champion dogs for a living) And on the back is a poem I wrote about her when she died. and its circled in roses. The vidual is for all the women and children that were killed due to domestic violence in our state.. I think there are 40 something. was beautiful last year hoping for a better turn out this year. Hope all is well with you and thanks for the smile you gave me. hugzzz Sheila

Tonia Conyers wrote:

Holy shi*!!! man, that sounds like a very rough childhood! And then to be cursed with this crap. Where does it say that if you have a rough childhood, you should have a rough adulthood?? Geesh

Tonia Conyers

tonia197426@...

Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com