3 year old anger ... Nada tears .. ugh

[Guest guest]

I mentioned in an earlier post what happened with my 3 year old this morning and

I realize I'm really upset about it. 

 

Basically if you didn't already see it, I was opening a gift from my hubby and

my 3 year old was behind me.  The next thing I know I get a closed fist right in

the small of my back and she hit really hard for her size!  I immediately turned

to her, realized she did it on purpose bc she grimaced at me and I just burst

into tears.  Then she realized she had hurt me and she burst into tears claiming

it was an accident and wouldn't tell me why she did it.

 

She is the very sensative and emotional child.  She is very outgoing and is the

child whose middle name is nada's first name.  My oldest daughter is wonderful,

loving and appreciative.  My youngest is fairly disrespectful when she wants to

be, very stubborn and entirely ungrateful when it comes to presents aside from

being reminded to say thank you.  She's a great little girl, please don't

misunderstand, but she's the polar opposite of her sister.  Now I go out of my

way to ensure that she isn't treated like the 'bad girl'.  I reinforce positive

behavoir etc and normally she's wonderful, but for some reason when presents

come out she is so cranky.  She's also the one who took the brunt of nada's

abuse a year ago.  I was so heart broken ...

 

Anyways I feel at a loss.  I felt nada's words come flooding back to me and I

just sat there and sobbed - I couldn't help it.  I held her in my arms and

hugged her tight asking her why and telling her i loved her - I didn't know what

else to do.  I don't know what I did to make her so angry in that instant - or

if it was me at all - she was cranky this morning.  She put herself down for a

nap 45 minutes later which is RARE for her. 

 

She's very strong willed, amazingly creative and a great little girl.  She is

challenging - I admit it, but I love her intensely all the same.  I also ensure

that my oldest doesn't get ignored or anything when dealing with her little

sister.

 

I just don't want to ever be the 'nada' to my children.  Having them mad at me

just breaks my heart.  That's what really hurt.  Any other moms out there have

some advice?  What did I do?  How can I ensure that my children won't hate me? 

I guess that's the question for the ages. ...

 

I love them so much and protect them and nurture them .. everything my nada

didn't do - and yet here I am kicking myself for how my poor nada must feel

since I have rejected her again and again.  So I wrote her that email -

Sorry I didn't put this all together earlier.  I just feel heart broken and I

hate Xmas bc it has nothing but horrible memories for me. 

 

Thanks for reading/listening - sorry so long