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Re: Stupid threats

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It sounds like they're desperate for your attention! Hang in there,

writermanque! You're doing great.

Hope you and your children have a wonderful, peaceful holiday!

>

> Dad sent me a letter yesterday. As a reminder, my parents contacted

> a lawyer to try to get back in touch with me and my kids. Seeing

> this as a threat of a lawsuit to try to assert " grandparents rights " ,

> we responded (to the lawyer) that we had consulted with a

> psychologist who didn't feel it was in the best interests of our

> children to have contact with them at this time (in our state the

> burden of proof is on them to show that it is in the kids' best

> interests). So dad sends this letter yesterday that states that he

> is going to send this psychologist a letter to give his side of the

> story and let him know that he and nada " aren't the evil people that

> he may have been led to believe " and to " offer our assistance to help

> with any issues you may have. " He then adds that if I have a problem

> with that, I need to contact him by December 30, otherwise the letter

> goes in the mail.

>

> I don't know about you, but this comes across as an entirely stupid

> threat. Like I'm supposed to be saying, oh no! Don't send a letter

> to the psychologist! I'll come down tomorrow and we'll sing

> Christmas carols and swill egg nog and pretend this never happened!

> This psychologist, by the way, is the therapist I've been working

> with for almost two years, who has been completely awesome, who

> agrees that my parents are bonkers. And don't you just love the

> little dig with offering " assistance " with my " issues " ? Ho ho ho!

>

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Truly!

Sounds to me like your dad has a wide streak of narcissism; the

arrogance and sense of entitlement are a tip-off. I'm so glad for you

that you are on top of this so that their threats have no power to

upset you, and you can have your own delightfully nada- and fada-free

Christmas with your own family.

Happy Holidays to you and all here at the Forum!

-Annie

>

> Dad sent me a letter yesterday. As a reminder, my parents contacted

> a lawyer to try to get back in touch with me and my kids. Seeing

> this as a threat of a lawsuit to try to assert " grandparents rights " ,

> we responded (to the lawyer) that we had consulted with a

> psychologist who didn't feel it was in the best interests of our

> children to have contact with them at this time (in our state the

> burden of proof is on them to show that it is in the kids' best

> interests). So dad sends this letter yesterday that states that he

> is going to send this psychologist a letter to give his side of the

> story and let him know that he and nada " aren't the evil people that

> he may have been led to believe " and to " offer our assistance to help

> with any issues you may have. " He then adds that if I have a problem

> with that, I need to contact him by December 30, otherwise the letter

> goes in the mail.

>

> I don't know about you, but this comes across as an entirely stupid

> threat. Like I'm supposed to be saying, oh no! Don't send a letter

> to the psychologist! I'll come down tomorrow and we'll sing

> Christmas carols and swill egg nog and pretend this never happened!

> This psychologist, by the way, is the therapist I've been working

> with for almost two years, who has been completely awesome, who

> agrees that my parents are bonkers. And don't you just love the

> little dig with offering " assistance " with my " issues " ? Ho ho ho!

>

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Beware the EggNog!

Swill away. Let them send the " Letter " to the Psychologist... it

only solidifies what you've been saying for 2 years.

Merry Christmas ~

>

> Dad sent me a letter yesterday. As a reminder, my parents

contacted

> a lawyer to try to get back in touch with me and my kids. Seeing

> this as a threat of a lawsuit to try to assert " grandparents

rights " ,

> we responded (to the lawyer) that we had consulted with a

> psychologist who didn't feel it was in the best interests of our

> children to have contact with them at this time (in our state the

> burden of proof is on them to show that it is in the kids' best

> interests). So dad sends this letter yesterday that states that he

> is going to send this psychologist a letter to give his side of the

> story and let him know that he and nada " aren't the evil people

that

> he may have been led to believe " and to " offer our assistance to

help

> with any issues you may have. " He then adds that if I have a

problem

> with that, I need to contact him by December 30, otherwise the

letter

> goes in the mail.

>

> I don't know about you, but this comes across as an entirely stupid

> threat. Like I'm supposed to be saying, oh no! Don't send a

letter

> to the psychologist! I'll come down tomorrow and we'll sing

> Christmas carols and swill egg nog and pretend this never

happened!

> This psychologist, by the way, is the therapist I've been working

> with for almost two years, who has been completely awesome, who

> agrees that my parents are bonkers. And don't you just love the

> little dig with offering " assistance " with my " issues " ? Ho ho ho!

>

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I entirely agree.  Let them send the letter and reiterate what you've already

said.  You are doing the right thing :)

________________________________

To: WTOAdultChildren1

Sent: Thursday, December 25, 2008 3:29:48 PM

Subject: Re: Stupid threats

Beware the EggNog!

Swill away. Let them send the " Letter " to the Psychologist. .. it

only solidifies what you've been saying for 2 years.

Merry Christmas ~ 

..

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It wouldn't surprise me if they didn't send anything. It's amazing what

they'll do when you call their bluff. I remember when I got married, at some

point during that weekend, my husband's favorite uncle and aunt (his

mother's identical twin) took us out to eat. Well, when we got back, my nada

took me aside and gave me a rant about how I disrespected her and my father

by staying out with them so long (from noon to 3pm, mind you!) and how I

should have made sure we got back sooner instead of leaving her alone like

that and so on...and seeing how I had just gotten married I was pretty worn

out from everything and I just agreed, yes, it was my fault and I actually

was believing it, too.

So nana pauses to think for a moment and then says, no, it wasn't your fault

after all, they should have done such and such and they (the aunt and uncle)

we now the ones disrespecting her. Yikes.

Looking back her issues are now so clear. Oh if I'd only known, and gone NC

so long ago. I'm NC now but that's 'cause she has died. But if she

hadn't...NC all the way.

Flowers in Oz

----- Original Message -----

I entirely agree. Let them send the letter and reiterate what you've already

said. You are doing the right thing :)

_______________________________

Swill away. Let them send the " Letter " to the Psychologist. .. it only

solidifies what you've been saying for 2 years.

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