Guest guest Posted December 17, 2008 Report Share Posted December 17, 2008 Hi there, I found out that my nada has BPD 6 months ago and have been coming to terms with it all. I have been just reading this site, but it has been great just to read and hear that some other people also have to deal with similar situations which I am going through. Well coming to the reason for my post. Last week my Grandmother passed away. I never got to visit her as she lives in another country, but I was sad, and frustrated with my circumstances at not ever being able to meet her. I was considering taking a loan and being present for the funeral at least, with my aunt showing me around and introducing me to the family. In the end I decided not to, it would be much better to meet the family in more positive circumstances, and with more available time. I decided all of this before I got a call from my nada who had been speaking to my brother who was present at the aunts place when we were discussing it all. My nada started to yell and said how she couldn't understand why I was doing this, and that since my brother got to meet her and was closer to her then he should deserve to go not me, and that she would not have helped me financially if I was going to piss off overseas. (I am a student and have returned home for the summer holidays, I have moved into a flat after 2 weeks at home and have had very little financial help). I told her that if I was going to go (which I wasn't at that point) I would have taken a loan so it wasn't her money. That it was my grandmother so I would have liked to have some involvement, and I calmly told her to stop yelling at me. Worst was that when I saw her next she pretended like nothing had happened, and that I was the crazy one. I was wondering if anyone had any advice for people who are still financially dependant on a bpd parent? Its very hard having to rely on her when she uses it against me at every opportunity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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