Re: Re: : I am still at the hospital

[Guest guest]

Joanne, may I please suggest that you are trying to do a bit much for your

father? It is all well and good to try and take care of your parents, but, you

cannot control everything. If he is able to speak to the nurses, etc, himself,

then it is HIS decision whether or not he does what he is supposed to. You have

to be able to take care of yourself. Stay this three times. " I have to be able

to take care of myself,...I have to be able to take care of myself,,,

Terry in TN (USA) <> <

>

>

> I have stayed most of the day and last night with my dad but tomorrow I am

going home and breaking free from some of this. i have stayed with him so that

they cannot feed him wrong, but the stress is killing me. Nobody is supporting

me and I am getting hassle from all directions

>

> I was calm until the last few hours, but really this was false. I have been

denying my feelings to cope and now it is all taking its toll.

>

> I phoned somebody I felt I could trust from Alanon. I was warbling on about it

all and half way through said something like I just need somebody normal to

speak to, and then later said, my dad might be addicted to drugs but at least he

is normal, and she replied i take great offence at you refering to people as

normal and not normal, there is no such thing as normal

>

> anyway, this taking 'offence' thing is going on a heck of a lot in my life

lately. Folk are taking offence at so many things, I am spluttering all over the

place.

>

> , something is going on with me, and it is not right. I feel like I am

under attack. I feel like I did many years ago. I had this feeling for a long

time and it is part of what made me ill with fibro

>

> My mind today has been on other meetings I have been to recently at Alanon and

focusing very much on the blame thing. Sometimes folk there say stuff like, well

you put up with it, you had a choice you could have left. This gets me in the

gut, because how can you leave when you dont know what it is that is causing

your troubles. i did not know my mom drank, i thought she was ill, how do you

leave a sick mother?

>

> I feel this way now here with my dad. I am being tormented. I am suspicious of

my dad. I know this sounds awful and I do not feel my mind is right, but my dad

is being proper weird with me and I do not know what is going on. I feel like he

is playing games with my head. I know there is a lot he is not telling me and I

do not know if this is because he is trying to protect me or if he thinks I am

nosey and overbearing. I have this horrible feeling in my belly that I am about

to be blamed for stuff

>

> I am so frustrated, and tired, really exhausted, my mind simply is not my own.

I feel like I am gasping for air. I feel like I need more energy to work out

what is going on, and when I try to work out what is going on I feel like I am

going to collapse.

>

> After that lot with the Alanon friend I just do not want to phone anybody

else.

>

> . i am getting this, I take offense to what you are saying thing a lot,

a very lot lately, and this feels like some kind of game. I am getting it with

many people. Honestly, I know I am hyper-sensitive right now, but I am wondering

if this I take offence thing is a now way of playing games. I am always last to

click on to these things. I have a childs brain with such things. This is why I

end up getting bullied because I kind of play into it.

>

> What I mean is when I used to take care of my family, my mom and sister and

all that, my mom used to say to me, I want you to take care of suchabody but i

do not want to here you speak of God. And when she would here me ever mention

God she would cut me off mid sentence and say, what have I told you. But then

the next day, when she was sober, she would say to me, Joann I love you so much

because you are so close to God, i could sit and listen to you for hours, your

manner and kindness are so warming to me. Stuff like this went on all the time

and I would get all confused. Now as I describe this it is obvious, I should

have just gotten away from my mom, but at the time this was not so clear. And I

stayed. anyway tellling me I should have left does not help me because I did not

leave and could not see I could and should leave. I know I was an adult but I

did not have an adults mind in this respect

>

> I am now so terribly confused with my dad. I feel like he is being abusive

treating me badly, but then I wonder is it just that I am tired. And then I feel

guilty because I am planning on escaping from here. But when I go he will not be

resilient enough to stand up to them and make sure he is eating right. In fact

he will not stand up to them. He will start asking for me once I have gone but

Anglela, the whole environment here is threatening to me

>

> My mom was here before, she was drunk, but kind enough, not being nasty or

anything like that. She just kept telling me not to get too involved with him

and stuff like that. But she too will not be happy when I leave. My mind is all

over the place and this really is not a healthy or safe situation for me.

>

> About 2 hours ago a nurse told me there is a priest here on night duty. he

arrives in about an hour from now. I am half and half whether I want to talk to

him. Normally I would. Normally, I would be stable enough to explain my concerns

but I feel so anxious I am scared of saying something wrong. It is that phone

call earlier that has done this. I am now obsessing about what everybody else is

thinking. I might just go and see him and not say much and just ask him to pray

for me and my dad.

>

> It is times like this that the loneliness of my life sets in. I cannot phone

my husband because he does not understand people on the phone. I do not want to

pester my children with this because frankly they hate it whenever I get

involved with my mom and dad. They just think I am going to end up all neurotic

like I used to be, and if you could see me now you would think this too

>

> I am going to be alright. I just want to go home. I just wish i had somebody

to talk to. This will pass, I know

>

> Thanks for being there. honestly, I dont know what i would do without you lot

sometimes

>

> Love joanne

>

> ________________________________

>

> To: fibromyalgiacured

> Sent: Thursday, 12 April 2012, 19:27

> Subject: Re: Re:Joanne

>

>

>

> Joanne

> I will praying for you your dad your husband and your family

> We all love you and hope the best for you and your loved ones

>

> Ciao-

> Ange

>

> ________________________________

>

> To: " fibromyalgiacured " <fibromyalgiacured >

> Sent: Thu, April 12, 2012 11:14:11 AM

> Subject: Re: Re:

>

>

>

> I have writers block, but just want you to know I am thinking of you, will

speak

> to you soon, I hope

>

> Love joanne

>

> ________________________________

>

> To: fibromyalgiacured

> Sent: Thursday, 12 April 2012, 10:34

> Subject: Re: Re:

>

> Hello

> Have you searched for a homepathic doctor in your area? Are you taking the

> recommended supplements from Bee's Site?

> I would careful doing yoga etc make sure you dont have hyper mobility. My

sister

>

> and I have that plus Fibro. She is 15 younger than me and has it worse but she

> had been eating lots of processed food her life and was on lots of

antibiotic's

> at a young age and for most of her life. She does not take the supplements on

a

> reg bases and still eats sugar.

> For me what has helped is the supplements, Grey Sea Salt,coconut oil, Braggs

> Vinegar and walking even if its just a block. I can sleep better and that has

> helped me as well. Also the bone broth I am lucky and my husband makes it. We

> dont drink it but we make a soup with it that we eat twice a week. If you have

a

>

> crock pot it makes it really easy. Stay away from diary gluten sugar alcohol

and

>

> processed foods.

> We are here to support each other and share our experiences.

>

> Ciao-

> Ange

>

> ________________________________

>

> To: " fibromyalgiacured " <fibromyalgiacured >

> Sent: Wed, April 11, 2012 8:13:30 AM

> Subject: Re: Re: Alison: This guy was told the diet does

not

>

> work for adults

>

> Dear Joanne I know I have ignored a lot of yours and the groups messages in

the

>

> past, but with a final dx of fibromyalgia I need as much suport as I can get.

> I am scared , frustrated and don't know which way to turn . Cleveland Clinic

> Rheumatology wants to send me through a 3 week pain management program that

they

>

> offer but I can't afford the expense of staying in Cleveland for 3 weeks and

> it's 3 1/2 hrs from my house and I really don't want to be away from my family

> that long either. I would like to know who to talk to about alternative meds

> such as herbs and minerals and like yoga vs pilates that kind of thing. I

would

>

> appreciate a responese back and any direction you may be able to send me in as

> well as dietary.

>

> thanks alot

> veronica mcintosh

>

> ________________________________

>

> To: " fibromyalgiacured " <fibromyalgiacured >

> Sent: Tuesday, April 10, 2012 1:35 PM

> Subject: Re: Re: Alison: This guy was told the diet does

not

>

> work for adults

>

> Tina

>

> I do understand. Do not worry about it. We are good friends and we have other

> things we can talk about. I am not one to try to force this on folk. All this

is

>

> a lot easier when we have less responsibility than you have. And also, I know

> you have difficulty getting face to face support. Regarding the addiction

thing

> with carbs Bees diet has helped me loads but I did need help from the 12 step

> groups too. I now you cannot go there. I am just glad that you do have some

> spiritual support that you have created with the film and other things you are

> doing for yourself.

>

> I have been a bit run down myself lately. Had a lot on with my dad and hubby

not

>

> being well, this might be showing in my shorter emails. Also, had a fair few

> folk with very serious illness emailing me direct and this has taken up my

time.

>

> I have not been posting here as much as I used to

>

> And also, your shares about homeopathy etc have been of benefit to a lot of

folk

>

> here. If the diet is not helping you should just forget about it and just

share

> about the things that are helping you. You have a lot of knowledge regarding

> alternative stuff and the things you share about are needed by many here

>

> I am rushing about here once again, but I will try to get online later.

>

> How are the films you bought? I have not bought any for a while and you

sharing

> about this has reminded me to have a look on ebay myself

>

> Love Joanne

>

> ________________________________

>

> To: fibromyalgiacured

> Sent: Tuesday, 10 April 2012, 17:22

> Subject: Re: Alison: This guy was told the diet does not

> work for adults

>

> I have lost momentum and motivation,and thinking of throwing in the towel on

> this diet.

>

>

> >

> > Alison

> >

> > I am struggling to get through all my emails but I saw this video today and

I

> >thought perhaps this might be something you will be interested in

> >

> >

> >

> > Love joanne

> >

> > Alison said..................

> >

> >

> >

> > Happy Easter Everyone !!!!!!

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Hi Joanne, I don’t post much but I do try to read most of the messages. This

one really hit home to me. I just want to say that sometimes you just have to

take a step back and realize that you can’t be all things to all people. I,

too, tried. Before I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia I worked a full time job,

took care of an Alcoholic husband and 5 children, cared for my Type 1 diabetic

mother and also cared for my father who’d had a heart attack. Fortunately my

parents only lived a block away from us, but after I came home from work, I

would fix dinner and then take part of it to my parents. Then I would have to

come home and deal with my husband and also take care of the children and the

house. I did everything and tried to please everybody. But in all this, I lost

myself.

Then I crashed. I couldn’t do much of anything and became practically

bedridden. My husband had to take over the household duties as I could no longer

do them. Fortunately about this time he retired, but it was very hard on me

giving up my control. But I had no choice. Now my children have grown up and

have families of their own and both of my parents have passed on. I have to

fight myself to allow my husband to continue to take care of the house. He seems

to enjoy it and does a good job, better than I could, so I just help him when I

can. I do usually cook most of the meals, but now I concentrate on taking care

of me. By giving up my need to control everyone, I’m now able to take care of

myself and thus have the ability again to help others when I can. Most of the

time, though, I just let them live their life and just worry about my own. Now

we’re all much happier, especially me.

So just take a step back, realize that you have done what you could for the

people you love, and give them a chance to take care of themselves. They will be

happy and you will be happy. You have already done your part to help them. Now

it is their choice as to what they will do with the information they have. I

think a good analogy is the way God handles humans. He gave us the Bible which

tells us how we should live, and then he allows us the choice to follow it’s

teachings or not. We have the knowledge available to us, but we also have free

will as to whether we follow that knowledge or not. Your family now has the

knowledge as to what is healthy for them, but it is now up to them whether they

will take that knowledge and apply it to their lives. You and I have chosen to

apply that knowledge and now we have to let go and allow our families to live

their lives as they want to. It isn’t easy, but we have to do it for the sake

of everyone, including ourselves.

Good luck with this and I hope what I’ve said will help you come to an

understanding of where you are.

Judy H

To Health Through Knowledge

Started taking Low Dose Naltrexone on January 20, 2009 for

Fibromyalgia, Restless Legs Syndrome, Hashimotos Thyroid and PCOS

http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/LDNforFibro/

From: Joanne Ford

Sent: Friday, April 13, 2012 3:48 PM

To: fibromyalgiacured

Subject: Re: Re: : I am still at the hospital

I have stayed most of the day and last night with my dad but tomorrow I am going

home and breaking free from some of this. i have stayed with him so that they

cannot feed him wrong, but the stress is killing me. Nobody is supporting me and

I am getting hassle from all directions

I was calm until the last few hours, but really this was false. I have been

denying my feelings to cope and now it is all taking its toll.

I phoned somebody I felt I could trust from Alanon. I was warbling on about it

all and half way through said something like I just need somebody normal to

speak to, and then later said, my dad might be addicted to drugs but at least he

is normal, and she replied i take great offence at you refering to people as

normal and not normal, there is no such thing as normal

anyway, this taking 'offence' thing is going on a heck of a lot in my life

lately. Folk are taking offence at so many things, I am spluttering all over the

place.

, something is going on with me, and it is not right. I feel like I am

under attack. I feel like I did many years ago. I had this feeling for a long

time and it is part of what made me ill with fibro

My mind today has been on other meetings I have been to recently at Alanon and

focusing very much on the blame thing. Sometimes folk there say stuff like, well

you put up with it, you had a choice you could have left. This gets me in the

gut, because how can you leave when you dont know what it is that is causing

your troubles. i did not know my mom drank, i thought she was ill, how do you

leave a sick mother?

I feel this way now here with my dad. I am being tormented. I am suspicious of

my dad. I know this sounds awful and I do not feel my mind is right, but my dad

is being proper weird with me and I do not know what is going on. I feel like he

is playing games with my head. I know there is a lot he is not telling me and I

do not know if this is because he is trying to protect me or if he thinks I am

nosey and overbearing. I have this horrible feeling in my belly that I am about

to be blamed for stuff

I am so frustrated, and tired, really exhausted, my mind simply is not my own. I

feel like I am gasping for air. I feel like I need more energy to work out what

is going on, and when I try to work out what is going on I feel like I am going

to collapse.

After that lot with the Alanon friend I just do not want to phone anybody else.

. i am getting this, I take offense to what you are saying thing a lot, a

very lot lately, and this feels like some kind of game. I am getting it with

many people. Honestly, I know I am hyper-sensitive right now, but I am wondering

if this I take offence thing is a now way of playing games. I am always last to

click on to these things. I have a childs brain with such things. This is why I

end up getting bullied because I kind of play into it.

What I mean is when I used to take care of my family, my mom and sister and all

that, my mom used to say to me, I want you to take care of suchabody but i do

not want to here you speak of God. And when she would here me ever mention God

she would cut me off mid sentence and say, what have I told you. But then the

next day, when she was sober, she would say to me, Joann I love you so much

because you are so close to God, i could sit and listen to you for hours, your

manner and kindness are so warming to me. Stuff like this went on all the time

and I would get all confused. Now as I describe this it is obvious, I should

have just gotten away from my mom, but at the time this was not so clear. And I

stayed. anyway tellling me I should have left does not help me because I did not

leave and could not see I could and should leave. I know I was an adult but I

did not have an adults mind in this respect

I am now so terribly confused with my dad. I feel like he is being abusive

treating me badly, but then I wonder is it just that I am tired. And then I feel

guilty because I am planning on escaping from here. But when I go he will not be

resilient enough to stand up to them and make sure he is eating right. In fact

he will not stand up to them. He will start asking for me once I have gone but

Anglela, the whole environment here is threatening to me

My mom was here before, she was drunk, but kind enough, not being nasty or

anything like that. She just kept telling me not to get too involved with him

and stuff like that. But she too will not be happy when I leave. My mind is all

over the place and this really is not a healthy or safe situation for me.

About 2 hours ago a nurse told me there is a priest here on night duty. he

arrives in about an hour from now. I am half and half whether I want to talk to

him. Normally I would. Normally, I would be stable enough to explain my concerns

but I feel so anxious I am scared of saying something wrong. It is that phone

call earlier that has done this. I am now obsessing about what everybody else is

thinking. I might just go and see him and not say much and just ask him to pray

for me and my dad.

It is times like this that the loneliness of my life sets in. I cannot phone my

husband because he does not understand people on the phone. I do not want to

pester my children with this because frankly they hate it whenever I get

involved with my mom and dad. They just think I am going to end up all neurotic

like I used to be, and if you could see me now you would think this too

I am going to be alright. I just want to go home. I just wish i had somebody to

talk to. This will pass, I know

Thanks for being there. honestly, I dont know what i would do without you lot

sometimes

Love joanne

________________________________

From: Giannini <mailto:bondgeek21%40yahoo.com>

To: mailto:fibromyalgiacured%40yahoogroups.com

Sent: Thursday, 12 April 2012, 19:27

Subject: Re: Re:Joanne

Joanne

I will praying for you your dad your husband and your family

We all love you and hope the best for you and your loved ones

Ciao-

Ange

________________________________

From: Joanne Ford <mailto:joannesford%40yahoo.co.uk>

To: " mailto:fibromyalgiacured%40yahoogroups.com "

<mailto:fibromyalgiacured%40yahoogroups.com>

Sent: Thu, April 12, 2012 11:14:11 AM

Subject: Re: Re:

I have writers block, but just want you to know I am thinking of you, will speak

to you soon, I hope

Love joanne

________________________________

From: Giannini <mailto:bondgeek21%40yahoo.com>

To: mailto:fibromyalgiacured%40yahoogroups.com

Sent: Thursday, 12 April 2012, 10:34

Subject: Re: Re:

Hello

Have you searched for a homepathic doctor in your area? Are you taking the

recommended supplements from Bee's Site?

I would careful doing yoga etc make sure you dont have hyper mobility. My sister

and I have that plus Fibro. She is 15 younger than me and has it worse but she

had been eating lots of processed food her life and was on lots of antibiotic's

at a young age and for most of her life. She does not take the supplements on a

reg bases and still eats sugar.

For me what has helped is the supplements, Grey Sea Salt,coconut oil, Braggs

Vinegar and walking even if its just a block. I can sleep better and that has

helped me as well. Also the bone broth I am lucky and my husband makes it. We

dont drink it but we make a soup with it that we eat twice a week. If you have a

crock pot it makes it really easy. Stay away from diary gluten sugar alcohol and

processed foods.

We are here to support each other and share our experiences.

Ciao-

Ange

________________________________

From: Mcintosh <mailto:veronica.mcintosh%40yahoo.com>

To: " mailto:fibromyalgiacured%40yahoogroups.com "

<mailto:fibromyalgiacured%40yahoogroups.com>

Sent: Wed, April 11, 2012 8:13:30 AM

Subject: Re: Re: Alison: This guy was told the diet does not

work for adults

Dear Joanne I know I have ignored a lot of yours and the groups messages in the

past, but with a final dx of fibromyalgia I need as much suport as I can get.

I am scared , frustrated and don't know which way to turn . Cleveland Clinic

Rheumatology wants to send me through a 3 week pain management program that they

offer but I can't afford the expense of staying in Cleveland for 3 weeks and

it's 3 1/2 hrs from my house and I really don't want to be away from my family

that long either. I would like to know who to talk to about alternative meds

such as herbs and minerals and like yoga vs pilates that kind of thing. I would

appreciate a responese back and any direction you may be able to send me in as

well as dietary.

thanks alot

veronica mcintosh

________________________________

From: Joanne Ford <mailto:joannesford%40yahoo.co.uk>

To: " mailto:fibromyalgiacured%40yahoogroups.com "

<mailto:fibromyalgiacured%40yahoogroups.com>

Sent: Tuesday, April 10, 2012 1:35 PM

Subject: Re: Re: Alison: This guy was told the diet does not

work for adults

Tina

I do understand. Do not worry about it. We are good friends and we have other

things we can talk about. I am not one to try to force this on folk. All this is

a lot easier when we have less responsibility than you have. And also, I know

you have difficulty getting face to face support. Regarding the addiction thing

with carbs Bees diet has helped me loads but I did need help from the 12 step

groups too. I now you cannot go there. I am just glad that you do have some

spiritual support that you have created with the film and other things you are

doing for yourself.

I have been a bit run down myself lately. Had a lot on with my dad and hubby not

being well, this might be showing in my shorter emails. Also, had a fair few

folk with very serious illness emailing me direct and this has taken up my time.

I have not been posting here as much as I used to

And also, your shares about homeopathy etc have been of benefit to a lot of folk

here. If the diet is not helping you should just forget about it and just share

about the things that are helping you. You have a lot of knowledge regarding

alternative stuff and the things you share about are needed by many here

I am rushing about here once again, but I will try to get online later.

How are the films you bought? I have not bought any for a while and you sharing

about this has reminded me to have a look on ebay myself

Love Joanne

________________________________

From: tina <mailto:cocoabear1965%40att.net>

To: mailto:fibromyalgiacured%40yahoogroups.com

Sent: Tuesday, 10 April 2012, 17:22

Subject: Re: Alison: This guy was told the diet does not

work for adults

I have lost momentum and motivation,and thinking of throwing in the towel on

this diet.

>

> Alison

>

> I am struggling to get through all my emails but I saw this video today and I

>thought perhaps this might be something you will be interested in

>

>

>

> Love joanne

>

> Alison said..................

>

>

>

> Happy Easter Everyone !!!!!!

>

>