Level of connection with bpd mom??

[Guest guest]

I'm at a point right now where I don't want to have my bpd mom in my

life any more. She was never REALLY awful until I was engaged five

years ago (now married). I have many good memories, also many not so

good, of my childhood. I never confronted the problems with my mom

until I was engaged. I think that's why I have had good times with her-

-I was such a good girl, always trying to keep her happy. Ever since I

started standing up to her it has been gut wrenching to deal with every

conflict that comes up with practically every time I see her/talk to

her. I don't want to deal with it any more. However, I also

understand that she has a mental illness and I don't--sometimes I feel

like I should be more compassionate and not cut off all contact with

her...if only I weren't so hurt (or petrified of a blow-up) every time

I am with her. Any ideas on how to not totally cut off contact but

still avoid most of the inevitable conflict (or tips on not letting my

mom get under my skin)???

[Guest guest]

I feel the same way. It seems impossible to not be angry with every

contact I have with my mother. After getting an angry voicemail

stating " I hope your happy " when the papers were signed on her 3rd

divorce I have had enough. The funny thing is I am happy. Happy that

her husband has made a smart choice and get out.