Need Advice, Please Help!

[Guest guest]

Hello,

I need advice from mothers or fathers and how you protect your

children from your parent with BPD. I still talk to my Nada,

sometimes... when she seems stable and is not self medicating. I am

currently 6 months pregnant with my first child and the concern of how

I am going to protect my child and future children from her is growing

and growing. I don't want to completely cut her out of my life, but my

number one goal is to protect my children.

She went on one of her drunken phone rampages last night. She called

my father (who wants nothing to do with my nada and has been that way

since they divorced 25 years ago) and proceeded to carry on a

conversation with my fathers wife who was too nice to put an end to

her ramblings.

Then she called me and insulted me and is already insulting my

parenting skills. She told me that my child was going to cut me off

and not talk to me for several years (when I was 17 and she kicked me

out of her house for the 100th time I moved in with my father and

didn't talk to her for several years why I got counseling for all of

the mental and emotional abuse). Her reason for my child not talking

to me when they become a teenager was because of " Karma " . I defended

myself by saying it has nothing to do with Karma it is the choices you

make as a parent that determine the relationship you have with your

child. I then took the advice my therapist told me so many times

before, " Mom, I love you but I can tell you have been drinking and

this conversation is over, we can finish it tomorrow if you would

like. " She screamed some thing I couldn't even translate and hung up.

I woke up this morning to several drunken voicemails, couldn't really

understand what she was saying, she left my husband several messages

which he is really not happy about since he has been " done " with her

for quite some time.

Sorry for such the long post, I really needed to vent. Pregnancy

hormones and a mother with BPD are a bad combination. I kept it cool

on the outside but sometimes she just makes my blood boil.

My husbands family and my father and his side of my family are

wonderful loving people and we are all very close. My Nada is the only

problem when it comes to " family " . I just want to know how you parents

handle a Nada without letting it affect your children. The last thing

I want is for my children to be put in the middle or even be the

slightest bit exposed to one of her " rampages " . Do you tell your

child/children about BPD and their grandparent? If so, how?

Any and all advice is VERY appreciated!! Thank you everyone in advance!!

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