fight or flight

[Guest guest]

i have panic attacks, but only while driving, and only while driving on the

interstate.  it baffles me. i can drive 65 miles an hour on a country road with

no problem.  if i drive on the interstate going 65 mph i start to feel hot and

cold at the same time...then i feel lightheaded, then a whoosh comes over me and

i feel unreal and " out of my body " .  that's when i look for an exit.  i'm so

scared i'll cause a wreck although i have never caused a wreck during a panic

episode.   i avoid driving in the interstate which keeps me from having panic

attacks, but it also keeps me from feeling fully self-sufficient.  

 

i have read about panic disorders but still can't get a handle on why this keeps

happening.  i get that my " fight or flight " wiring is messed up from having

been  in a prolonged hypervigilant state as a kid. 

 

i do have plenty of bad memories of being in the car as a child with nada and

being terrified.  she would take me on stalking missions at night..both of us in

our nightgowns.  she would drive past people's houses and spy on them.  she

would sometimes talk or laugh to herself.  i couldn't see over the dash, but i

could tell she was driving too fast, or swerving.    i will not be a passenger

in a car with her now.  i cannot remember the last time i was a passenger in a

car with her.  maybe 15 years ago? 

 

my question is....i am aware of this connection, so why do they still happen? 

do you think it is purely chemical?  they don't happen when i would think they

should...like while i'm on the phone with nada, or when i know i have to see

nada.  anyone have similar experiences?  any insight?