Re: babies-a reason to smile-;lori

[Guest guest]

lori.renfroe wrote:

>

> He is so precious that I can't remember what it was like before he

> was brought into our lives.

>

Lori,

Just one baby smile, can melt anyones' pain for awhile. Aren't they

great ? i have a while to wait for a grand baby and hope I make it. it

is one of the things that keeps me going. My husband can care for

himself and now my son is 21, I seem replaceable, but I try to keep

from those dark thoughts and try to think i make a difference.

it is important to have those things to live for. Congrats on a

grand-baby and I hope your pain subsides so that you can enjoy him

immensely. Bennie

>

[Guest guest]

I'm glad you have families to love and that love you. I really am. I

just wanted to say it's wonderful to feel loved and in our condition

it can really help. In my case unfortunately, I don't have that. I am

a single mother who worked very hard to give her son a good life. He

used my illness as an excuse to not do his homework and to get

sympathy from his teachers. Now, instead of graduating from high

school and going to college in the fall, he has decided to drop out of

school and smoke pot all day. He has basically abandoned me. He steals

my pain meds. and disappears for days at a time. And I am the bad guy.

I can't live alone and I can't count on him to help me. I hate living

in unbearable pain, but I could tolerate it if I had the love and

support of my son. Now, I just pray for death, I feel I have nothing

to live for. I don't know what to do. Sorry, I just needed to vent.

Jane

[Guest guest]

I am so sorry...I truly understand. My last husband was the most

precious thing till he got hooked on meth. We finally had to part and

it's still difficult. But he was supposed to keep me insured and yes

he would steal my meds, and pawn things over and over. And one week

$5000.00 that I had borrowed for work on my handyman special even

disappeared. I still love it but I need to survive.

You are dealing with a place where you are always on guard and it will destroy

you if you stay there. My daughter calls it being hyper vigilant because you

are constantly watching and waiting for something to happen.

That being said, my son who struggled from 26 to 36 got himself

turned around. He moved in with me when he was 38 almost 39. He has

been there one year. So many things have been restored to him in the

last year. I asked him once if he was surprised at how much blessing

he had been to me and how he had also been blessed. He stated that he

set his goals and he wasn't going to let me down or himself.

I have 3/4 acre, 3 bar ditches, several large guard dogs, a small house dog,

etc. He helps with all the physical including the vacuuming, mopping, and

laundry. He doesn't like to clean the bathroom or dust. But we are having so

much fun. I too really wished to die at one point, and now my emotional life is

back on track.

Although some days I do want to die from looking forward to nothing but chronic

pain and I have to work to have insurance. Please keep thinking positive things

can change when you least expect it.

Cyrilla

>

> I'm glad you have families to love and that love you. I really am. I

>

[Guest guest]

Jane wrote:

....he has decided to drop out of school and smoke pot all day. He has

basically abandoned me. He steals my pain meds. and disappears for

days at a time. And I am the bad guy. I can't live alone and I can't

count on him to help me. I hate living in unbearable pain, but I

could tolerate it if I had the love and support of my son. Now, I

just pray for death, I feel I have nothing to live for. I don't know

what to do. Sorry, I just needed to vent.

Jane

Jane,

I would like to say that I have been, in part, in the same situation

with a son.

Our son, who is now 22, was one who blamed me for all of his bad

choices in life. He did drop out of high school to smoke pot & do

nothing. We went through him being caught by the police just for

smoking & once for a very large amount of theft from the place he was

working. That one almost caught him a felony because he was 18 so the

charges were a lot more significant. That was one thing that helped

him to turn his life around.

I tell you that because I want you to know that even your son still

has a chance to make his life right.

I will keep your situation in my prayers. I wanted to let you know

that you are not alone.

Lori