Our personal needs, and ways to achieve them

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Moderator's note:

Missy, I changed your subject heading, so that we won't recieve any spam through

whoever your internet service provider is. There was truly no other reason to

change it.

This is a helpful post, especially it's honestly. Thanks

Kaylene

I seem to have the opposite problem as most of the posters here. I

have a very, very high sex drive (always have), and the biggest

hinderance to it is that I am in too much pain to move around the way

that I would like. Well, that and the fact that my husband, who has

no medical issues and is on no medications, does NOT have a sex drive

equal to mine.

So, here I am, the kind of person who gets exceptionally grouchy if I

don't get to have sex at least once a week, popping morphine and

percocet just prior to it so that I can enjoy it with as little pain

as possible. And I've been seeking out ways to make it easier. I

can't give any advice on the lack of drive, but I can give some advice

on how to make it easier for others.

First, a sex swing has made a huge difference. It is a swing that

hangs from a hook in the ceiling, and it allows for significant

freedom of movement without having to put weight and pressure on sore

parts. Plus, it's just plain fun.

Second, different positions help more! I have back pain and, for me,

certain positions (I don't know how much I'm allowed to say here!) are

easier on my back than others.

If you have knee problems, perhaps being on your side will be less stressfull on

the body. Again, it depends on the area of pain, and a book that shows

different positions may be a good guide to give you ideas.

Thirdly, I have actually, incorporated the TENS unit into our sex

lives on occasion. It's distracting to the nerves, kinda fun, and

gives the same relief during sex that I would be receiving otherwise.

And lastly, I would say that having as active a sex life as possible

will probably HELP. Because it can be a distraction, it makes your

body feel good, and it will definitely help your mind-set and your

relationship with your partner/spouse.

Even if you're not really in the mood at first, you might be as things progress.

And if the problem is achieving an orgasm, I suggest you look into... marital

aids that can encourage and help along such things. Again, I can't be terribly

descriptive without knowing for sure what might cross a line.

So, for what it's worth, there are some ideas that I have found

helpful for me. Through all of this, and years of it, I've somehow

managed to have an active sex life, so I think I must be doing

*something* right.

in MD