Guest guest Posted October 21, 1999 Report Share Posted October 21, 1999 This brought up an interesting memory for me. If you have ever been around meetings long enough, the following question will arise; Can one become addicted to meetings? At the time, I thought, yes, I am an addictive person. In my wonderful 20/20 hindsight perspective-No. I simply had nowhere else to go, knew no other way and was becoming brainwashed and close-minded enough to believe that my options were limited- Come to think of it, somewhere I heard " AA is the ONLY way " , and I simply (and I do say SIMPLY)followed this Way for 15 years. All of my " friends " were in AA and I felt " a part of " (THE BORG!!!!). It has been a painful lesson, but I would rather be alone than mired in a false belief system pretending to be happy. " md matt " wrote: original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=8751 > I happened to look up hypocrite and hypocrisy in the dictionary and the > definition surprised me: > hypocrisy: the act of playing a part on stage. Trying to be what > one is not or to believe in what one does not. > The false assumption of an appearance of virtue or > religion. > That helps me understand why people in XA and Christian groups pretend to be > happy and to believe even though their actions say something else entirely. > Matt > > ______________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 1999 Report Share Posted October 21, 1999 This brought up an interesting memory for me. If you have ever been around meetings long enough, the following question will arise; Can one become addicted to meetings? At the time, I thought, yes, I am an addictive person. In my wonderful 20/20 hindsight perspective-No. I simply had nowhere else to go, knew no other way and was becoming brainwashed and close-minded enough to believe that my options were limited- Come to think of it, somewhere I heard " AA is the ONLY way " , and I simply (and I do say SIMPLY)followed this Way for 15 years. All of my " friends " were in AA and I felt " a part of " (THE BORG!!!!). It has been a painful lesson, but I would rather be alone than mired in a false belief system pretending to be happy. " md matt " wrote: original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=8751 > I happened to look up hypocrite and hypocrisy in the dictionary and the > definition surprised me: > hypocrisy: the act of playing a part on stage. Trying to be what > one is not or to believe in what one does not. > The false assumption of an appearance of virtue or > religion. > That helps me understand why people in XA and Christian groups pretend to be > happy and to believe even though their actions say something else entirely. > Matt > > ______________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 1999 Report Share Posted October 21, 1999 there probably was no need for a word with hypocrisy's meaning untill relgion was invented. Dave " md matt " wrote: original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=8751 > I happened to look up hypocrite and hypocrisy in the dictionary and the > definition surprised me: > hypocrisy: the act of playing a part on stage. Trying to be what > one is not or to believe in what one does not. > The false assumption of an appearance of virtue or > religion. > That helps me understand why people in XA and Christian groups pretend to be > happy and to believe even though their actions say something else entirely. > Matt > > ______________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 21, 1999 Report Share Posted October 21, 1999 there probably was no need for a word with hypocrisy's meaning untill relgion was invented. Dave " md matt " wrote: original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=8751 > I happened to look up hypocrite and hypocrisy in the dictionary and the > definition surprised me: > hypocrisy: the act of playing a part on stage. Trying to be what > one is not or to believe in what one does not. > The false assumption of an appearance of virtue or > religion. > That helps me understand why people in XA and Christian groups pretend to be > happy and to believe even though their actions say something else entirely. > Matt > > ______________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 dmarcoot@... writes: > there probably was no need for a word with hypocrisy's meaning untill > relgion was invented. I disagree. I think it's probably been around at least as long as gender. ( " I really do love you, " and " I'll respect you in the morning, " require no belief in a " higher power. " ) Ta, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 dmarcoot@... writes: > there probably was no need for a word with hypocrisy's meaning untill > relgion was invented. I disagree. I think it's probably been around at least as long as gender. ( " I really do love you, " and " I'll respect you in the morning, " require no belief in a " higher power. " ) Ta, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 dmarcoot@... writes: > there probably was no need for a word with hypocrisy's meaning untill > relgion was invented. I disagree. I think it's probably been around at least as long as gender. ( " I really do love you, " and " I'll respect you in the morning, " require no belief in a " higher power. " ) Ta, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 I think their is a little bit of hypocrisy in everyone including me. I pretend to like my job, pretend I'm doing fine. A lot of it is expected in society. We aren't allowed to be honest all the time. Is that a bad thing? I think about that a lot. I used to think that people just were awful because no one tells the truth all the time. A lot of that came from my 12 step beliefs and catholic upbringing. Now that I think about it more, I think its ok that people aren't 100% honest. I truly believe that life has a competitive angle. A part of every human wants to do better than others. And they want to be right. I don't think this makes us evil. Its just our natural drive. If you take it down to a primitive level. I think a caveman would be very protective of food/shelter/social status, his wife and kids, and his sect of friends. His little world. What's wrong with that? Nothing really. Luckily, we have the ability to think before we do things or to be rational. However, I don't think humans will ever go around telling the truth about everything they do. Simply because we lose our edge in the rat race. And a lot of others will seize on your vulnerabilities. This is just my opinion. I go back and forth on this one. But I truly believe there is a ambitious side to everyone. I side that wants to come out on top. Or at least to be told, " your'e right, they're wrong. " This is why we all live in our little boxes with our little support groups. And I think XA is just as competitive. It plays by the same rules. A fight to the finish. Life doesn't make sense because people don't make sense. Mainly because emotions arent' predictable. If we were machines they're wouldn't be a need for support groups, god or self help. But if we were all robots life would be dull. I have no idea where I'm going with this. Thanks, Matt >From: saes@... >Reply-To: 12-step-freeegroups >To: 12-step-freeegroups >Subject: Re: Hypocrisy >Date: Fri, 22 Oct 1999 07:02:33 EDT > >dmarcoot@... writes: > > > there probably was no need for a word with hypocrisy's meaning untill > > relgion was invented. > >I disagree. I think it's probably been around at least as long as gender. > >( " I really do love you, " and " I'll respect you in the morning, " require no >belief in a " higher power. " ) > >Ta, > > >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Looking for the latest consumer electronic gadgets or computer >equipment? eBay has thousands of audio equipment, computer >games & accessories. You never know what you might find at eBay! >http://clickhere./click/1142 > > >eGroups.com home: /group/12-step-free > - Simplifying group communications > > > > > ______________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 I think their is a little bit of hypocrisy in everyone including me. I pretend to like my job, pretend I'm doing fine. A lot of it is expected in society. We aren't allowed to be honest all the time. Is that a bad thing? I think about that a lot. I used to think that people just were awful because no one tells the truth all the time. A lot of that came from my 12 step beliefs and catholic upbringing. Now that I think about it more, I think its ok that people aren't 100% honest. I truly believe that life has a competitive angle. A part of every human wants to do better than others. And they want to be right. I don't think this makes us evil. Its just our natural drive. If you take it down to a primitive level. I think a caveman would be very protective of food/shelter/social status, his wife and kids, and his sect of friends. His little world. What's wrong with that? Nothing really. Luckily, we have the ability to think before we do things or to be rational. However, I don't think humans will ever go around telling the truth about everything they do. Simply because we lose our edge in the rat race. And a lot of others will seize on your vulnerabilities. This is just my opinion. I go back and forth on this one. But I truly believe there is a ambitious side to everyone. I side that wants to come out on top. Or at least to be told, " your'e right, they're wrong. " This is why we all live in our little boxes with our little support groups. And I think XA is just as competitive. It plays by the same rules. A fight to the finish. Life doesn't make sense because people don't make sense. Mainly because emotions arent' predictable. If we were machines they're wouldn't be a need for support groups, god or self help. But if we were all robots life would be dull. I have no idea where I'm going with this. Thanks, Matt >From: saes@... >Reply-To: 12-step-freeegroups >To: 12-step-freeegroups >Subject: Re: Hypocrisy >Date: Fri, 22 Oct 1999 07:02:33 EDT > >dmarcoot@... writes: > > > there probably was no need for a word with hypocrisy's meaning untill > > relgion was invented. > >I disagree. I think it's probably been around at least as long as gender. > >( " I really do love you, " and " I'll respect you in the morning, " require no >belief in a " higher power. " ) > >Ta, > > >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Looking for the latest consumer electronic gadgets or computer >equipment? eBay has thousands of audio equipment, computer >games & accessories. You never know what you might find at eBay! >http://clickhere./click/1142 > > >eGroups.com home: /group/12-step-free > - Simplifying group communications > > > > > ______________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 I think their is a little bit of hypocrisy in everyone including me. I pretend to like my job, pretend I'm doing fine. A lot of it is expected in society. We aren't allowed to be honest all the time. Is that a bad thing? I think about that a lot. I used to think that people just were awful because no one tells the truth all the time. A lot of that came from my 12 step beliefs and catholic upbringing. Now that I think about it more, I think its ok that people aren't 100% honest. I truly believe that life has a competitive angle. A part of every human wants to do better than others. And they want to be right. I don't think this makes us evil. Its just our natural drive. If you take it down to a primitive level. I think a caveman would be very protective of food/shelter/social status, his wife and kids, and his sect of friends. His little world. What's wrong with that? Nothing really. Luckily, we have the ability to think before we do things or to be rational. However, I don't think humans will ever go around telling the truth about everything they do. Simply because we lose our edge in the rat race. And a lot of others will seize on your vulnerabilities. This is just my opinion. I go back and forth on this one. But I truly believe there is a ambitious side to everyone. I side that wants to come out on top. Or at least to be told, " your'e right, they're wrong. " This is why we all live in our little boxes with our little support groups. And I think XA is just as competitive. It plays by the same rules. A fight to the finish. Life doesn't make sense because people don't make sense. Mainly because emotions arent' predictable. If we were machines they're wouldn't be a need for support groups, god or self help. But if we were all robots life would be dull. I have no idea where I'm going with this. Thanks, Matt >From: saes@... >Reply-To: 12-step-freeegroups >To: 12-step-freeegroups >Subject: Re: Hypocrisy >Date: Fri, 22 Oct 1999 07:02:33 EDT > >dmarcoot@... writes: > > > there probably was no need for a word with hypocrisy's meaning untill > > relgion was invented. > >I disagree. I think it's probably been around at least as long as gender. > >( " I really do love you, " and " I'll respect you in the morning, " require no >belief in a " higher power. " ) > >Ta, > > >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >Looking for the latest consumer electronic gadgets or computer >equipment? eBay has thousands of audio equipment, computer >games & accessories. You never know what you might find at eBay! >http://clickhere./click/1142 > > >eGroups.com home: /group/12-step-free > - Simplifying group communications > > > > > ______________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 mdprat@... writes: > I think their is a little bit of hypocrisy in everyone including me. I > pretend to like my job, pretend I'm doing fine. A lot of it is expected in > society. We aren't allowed to be honest all the time. > Is that a bad thing? I believe it used to be called a " Polite social fiction. " One was lauded for being able to keep up an appropriate face to the circumstances, rather than the distasteful trend towards so much honesty that you just want to tell people you don't really give a damn what their issues are, and just wish they would shut up. There's something to be said for the sort of social distance we've lost in the interim. Perhaps the next trendy thing ought to be " the new formality " to rebel against nauseating levels of self-disclosure. OTOH, I think most people understand that we all go to work and pretend to be more pleased than we really are. It's almost part of the contract. I think real hypocrisy is when someone reprsents themselves as being " completely honest with the bark off " and THEN lies through their teeth. Ta, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 mdprat@... writes: > I think their is a little bit of hypocrisy in everyone including me. I > pretend to like my job, pretend I'm doing fine. A lot of it is expected in > society. We aren't allowed to be honest all the time. > Is that a bad thing? I believe it used to be called a " Polite social fiction. " One was lauded for being able to keep up an appropriate face to the circumstances, rather than the distasteful trend towards so much honesty that you just want to tell people you don't really give a damn what their issues are, and just wish they would shut up. There's something to be said for the sort of social distance we've lost in the interim. Perhaps the next trendy thing ought to be " the new formality " to rebel against nauseating levels of self-disclosure. OTOH, I think most people understand that we all go to work and pretend to be more pleased than we really are. It's almost part of the contract. I think real hypocrisy is when someone reprsents themselves as being " completely honest with the bark off " and THEN lies through their teeth. Ta, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 mdprat@... writes: > I think their is a little bit of hypocrisy in everyone including me. I > pretend to like my job, pretend I'm doing fine. A lot of it is expected in > society. We aren't allowed to be honest all the time. > Is that a bad thing? I believe it used to be called a " Polite social fiction. " One was lauded for being able to keep up an appropriate face to the circumstances, rather than the distasteful trend towards so much honesty that you just want to tell people you don't really give a damn what their issues are, and just wish they would shut up. There's something to be said for the sort of social distance we've lost in the interim. Perhaps the next trendy thing ought to be " the new formality " to rebel against nauseating levels of self-disclosure. OTOH, I think most people understand that we all go to work and pretend to be more pleased than we really are. It's almost part of the contract. I think real hypocrisy is when someone reprsents themselves as being " completely honest with the bark off " and THEN lies through their teeth. Ta, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 22, 1999 Report Share Posted October 22, 1999 Hi I am very impressed by folks like yourself who have left XA after many years involvement. More significant I think, than the Sobriety Time so valued by AA. Pete wrose-@... wrote: original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=8752 > This brought up an interesting memory for me. > > If you have ever been around meetings long enough, the following > question will arise; > Can one become addicted to meetings? > > At the time, I thought, yes, I am an addictive person. > > In my wonderful 20/20 hindsight perspective-No. > > I simply had nowhere else to go, knew no other way and was becoming > brainwashed and close-minded enough to believe that my options were > limited- > > Come to think of it, somewhere I heard " AA is the ONLY way " , and I > simply (and I do say SIMPLY)followed this Way for 15 years. All of my > " friends " were in AA and I felt " a part of " (THE BORG!!!!). > > It has been a painful lesson, but I would rather be alone than mired in > a false belief system pretending to be happy. > > > " md matt " wrote: > original article:/group/12-step-free/?start=8751 > > I happened to look up hypocrite and hypocrisy in the dictionary and > the > > definition surprised me: > > hypocrisy: the act of playing a part on stage. Trying to be what > > one is not or to believe in what one does not. > > The false assumption of an appearance of virtue or > > religion. > > That helps me understand why people in XA and Christian groups > pretend to be > > happy and to believe even though their actions say something else > entirely. > > Matt > > > > ______________________________________________________ > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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