Introduction and Withdrawing from Lithium

[Guest guest]

Hello!

I'm a 19 year old Swedish guy, and I have been taking lithium for one and a half

years now. It all started with a manic episode that resulted in six weeks of

hospitalization. They gave me zyprexa to start with and later they also gave me

the lithium. When I got out, I quit taking the zyprexa almost immediately. I had

these strange reactions to it even in relatively lower doses. My eyes would for

example fixate completely unnaturally, though it is really hard to describe. I

felt much better, and the only side effect I noticed was that it was harder to

sleep. Not only because I wasn't as tired all the time, but also because started

being so aware of my own body's sounds (this might perhaps have been the effect

of another cause, anxiety was at least what my doctor suggested).

After about 3-4 months of being merely on lithium I told my doctors that I

wanted to get off that also. They weren't happy about it of course, but they

agreed on setting up a scheme for tapering. If I remember correctly their

prescription was that I would taper one tablet every second day, which for me (I

took 5 tablets, with 42mg each) meant 9 days from 5 to 0 tablets (for some

reason the number 12 feels more familiar than 9 regarding how many days it took,

but that might be less important). Of course this didn't exactly end

spectacular, at least not in regards to the original plan, which was not to end

up at the hospital again.

Why do I want to be medication free? Because I really lack the passion and the

authenticity that comes with a natural set of emotions. I know that everything

weren't perfect before, but at least I had the opportunities! It was my lifelong

passion to introspect and explore the capabilities of the mind, but now I feel

so foggy and mentally frail. My motivation doesn't take me further than to

postpone even the simplest actions directed help me get better, the writing of

this little introduction is just an example.

So I haven't given up. Fortunately I have gotten in contact with I think the

most suited therapist that I could find in Sweden. If you know about

Mackler you might know who she is. She is the founder of the Family Care

Foundation which , as you might know, did a film about recently. With her

help I'm hoping to give this withdrawing another shot, this time in a much

slower pace.

I will soon be moving (in a week actually) to Gothenburg, where I will study

music at a folk high-school for one year. Thus I will be very close to Carina,

as well as I will be practicing and learning about one of my passions. My

tapering have actually already started. I took 5 tablets of lithium as before

(nothing else) and I am now down to 4. The reduction happened the 4th of June

and I have had no real problems after that, at least not in the sense of

becoming manic. What I have experienced is shorter periods (one or two) of

depression that I at least in the moment felt was heavier than before (one

occurred during the Swedish Midsummer's Evening as I was alone that day), but

I'm really not sure If that was related to the tapering. This leads me to ask

the first question, do you know what kinds of side-effects that can be expected

during withdrawal of lithium?

If I am to taper of really slowly, I can't go about tapering one tablet of 42mg

at a time, right? But what I don't understand is how anything other is possible

with lithium. For as understand it, cutting the pills is no good with this kind

of medication. Perhaps I can find smaller doses or in liquid, as I have seen

exists in some places? Either way I would really appreciate any advice

concerning the specifics on how to go off this horrible medication.

Another thing I would like to ask, is how does this therapeutic window ascribed

to lithium will affect the withdrawal? According to my doctors, when the

lithium-content in your blood is below this " window " , it will have practically

no effect. If this is so, then tapering from the four to three, might have just

the same effect as tapering from four to zero. I'm having a hard time grasping

this, and I do not really trust my doctors so I would be happy to hear someone

elses thoughts/experiences/knowledge.

With regards,

Hampus

Ps. Regarding the zyprexa withdrawal: When got out I had already been given less

and less zyprexa. The plan was that I should have stayed on that low dose but I

was so mad at it (and them) that I just stopped right away).