MY FIRST POST

[Guest guest]

My name is Shanon and I have lived in SF since 1990. In July 2010 my mom got

very sick and ended up in a psych ward in Glendale , CA I flew down there and to

my surprise the mom that I had just talked to 2 days before was completely

different. She didn't know where she was, what state we were in and thought that

she worked at the hospital..I was in shock! in Dec of that your 5 days

before Christmas my mom was diagnosed with LBD. I had never heard of it before

and didn't know what to expect or do, all I know was I had to be there for her.

I went back home put my stuff in storage and came back and was there when she

was released from the hospital and have been her sole caregiver 24/7 since July

30th 2010. This has been the hardest thing I have ever done in my life and not

in a millions years did I think something like this could happen to my mom. She

was a very healthy out going person. A massage therapist as well. It's been

almost 2 years that

I've been in LA and it's taking it's toll on me and unfortunately if your not

rich, you pretty much screwed when it comes to help. 

I thought that my " so called family " would be there, but they haven't done a

thing. My brother and sister who I haven't talked to in 20 years( they dis-owned

me because I'm gay) hasn't called her in months and on Xmas didn't call or even

send a card... " what kind of person does that? I'm so disappointed in how people

acted it still to this day I just don't get it, How do you abandon your own

mother? that's sick! I've been looking for a nursing home for my mom because I

can't keep this up to much longer and I need to get my life back on track or

I'll be in big trouble. Neither one of us has money and I feel terrible having

to put her in a home but I have no choice, I'm all she has and if I don't take

care of myself I'll end up sick and homeless. I try to stay positive but it's

becoming more and more hard to do, that's why I joined this group in hopes that

reading other peoples stories well give me strength. I had no idea there was

such a group until

a few days ago. I now know that I'm not alone. I wish the best to all of you in

your journey and prayer for us all.

Peaces Shanon

[Guest guest]

Good Evening Vivian,

Thank you for taking the time to read it, I appreciate that. it's been a long

hard road and I know it's not going to get any easier as I get closer to putting

my mom in a home, I just pray that I find a place for her where people will love

her. I have so much respect for all the people who do what were doing ..I never

thought that I would be in this position..but I am. I wish you all the best as

well, hang in there....

Shanon

 

 

________________________________

To: LBDcaregivers

Sent: Sunday, April 1, 2012 6:24 PM

Subject: Re: MY FIRST POST

Dear Shanon:  Thank you for sharing your story.  Reading these posts I know

that I am not alone in this journey.  The journey is not fun, but having

each other and God make this journey possible.  I have put both of my

in-laws in a nursing home.  Those 2 days were the hardest I have been

through.  You doubt what you are doing, doubt if it right thing to do,

etc.  My heart was heavy, but I knew in my heart it was the right thing to

do for both of them when the time came.

I am not sure of distances if moving her to a NH out where you live would

be an option. I hope that you find the best for your mother.

I wish you all the best!!!!

Vivian (husband dx with PD, then LBD in 2010, but something going in for at

least 8 years)

> **

>

>

> My name is Shanon and I have lived in SF since 1990. In July 2010 my mom

> got very sick and ended up in a psych ward in Glendale , CA I flew down

> there and to my surprise the mom that I had just talked to 2 days before

> was completely different. She didn't know where she was, what state we were

> in and thought that she worked at the hospital..I was in shock! in Dec of

> that your 5 days before Christmas my mom was diagnosed with LBD. I had

> never heard of it before and didn't know what to expect or do, all I know

> was I had to be there for her. I went back home put my stuff in storage and

> came back and was there when she was released from the hospital and have

> been her sole caregiver 24/7 since July 30th 2010. This has been the

> hardest thing I have ever done in my life and not in a millions years did I

> think something like this could happen to my mom. She was a very healthy

> out going person. A massage therapist as well. It's been almost 2 years that

> I've been in LA and it's taking it's toll on me and unfortunately if your

> not rich, you pretty much screwed when it comes to help.

>

> I thought that my " so called family " would be there, but they haven't done

> a thing. My brother and sister who I haven't talked to in 20 years( they

> dis-owned me because I'm gay) hasn't called her in months and

> on Xmas didn't call or even send a card... " what kind of person does that?

> I'm so disappointed in how people acted it still to this day I just don't

> get it, How do you abandon your own mother? that's sick! I've been looking

> for a nursing home for my mom because I can't keep this up to much longer

> and I need to get my life back on track or I'll be in big trouble. Neither

> one of us has money and I feel terrible having to put her in a home but I

> have no choice, I'm all she has and if I don't take care of myself I'll end

> up sick and homeless. I try to stay positive but it's becoming more and

> more hard to do, that's why I joined this group in hopes that reading other

> peoples stories well give me strength. I had no idea there was such a group

> until

> a few days ago. I now know that I'm not alone. I wish the best to all of

> you in your journey and prayer for us all.

>

> Peaces Shanon

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks so much for the tips Kate, I have to put her in a home by next week and

I'm freaking out! Just curious is medicare the same as medicaid? and where would

I find the listing that medicare inspects? is it on their website...thanks so

much 

Shanon

 

 

________________________________

To: LBDcaregivers

Sent: Monday, April 2, 2012 6:41 AM

Subject: Re: MY FIRST POST

Hi, .

Recognizing the need for a nursing home is a huge first step.  For me, it

took some medical Drama and a lot of support before I could accept it.

Before anything else, go to www.medicare.gov and click on Facilities and

Doctors, then on Compare Nursing Homes.  Medicare conducts yearly (or is it

semi yearly) inspections of all nursing facilities and scores them in

several different areas.  You can find those that are considered the best

in you area, and you can determine who is the best in the areas you are

most concerned with.  The best often have waiting lists, so it is important

to get your mom's name in ASAP in as many as you would find acceptable.

Moving someone with dementia isn't always a good idea, but if you end up

with a nursing home that you really don't like, you can move to another if

necessary.  If you are concerned about paying for it, check into Medicaid

or other assistance right away.  My mom's Medicaid application took 6

months, but the nursing home was patient about it and waited for

reimbursement (it was retroactive to the date that Mom entered the

facility).  Start by checking the medicare.gov listings and then call the

county senior services ASAP to talk about help.

Best wishes.

Kate

> **

>

>

> My name is Shanon and I have lived in SF since 1990. In July 2010 my mom

> got very sick and ended up in a psych ward in Glendale , CA I flew down

> there and to my surprise the mom that I had just talked to 2 days before

> was completely different. She didn't know where she was, what state we were

> in and thought that she worked at the hospital..I was in shock! in Dec of

> that your 5 days before Christmas my mom was diagnosed with LBD. I had

> never heard of it before and didn't know what to expect or do, all I know

> was I had to be there for her. I went back home put my stuff in storage and

> came back and was there when she was released from the hospital and have

> been her sole caregiver 24/7 since July 30th 2010. This has been the

> hardest thing I have ever done in my life and not in a millions years did I

> think something like this could happen to my mom. She was a very healthy

> out going person. A massage therapist as well. It's been almost 2 years that

> I've been in LA and it's taking it's toll on me and unfortunately if your

> not rich, you pretty much screwed when it comes to help.

>

> I thought that my " so called family " would be there, but they haven't done

> a thing. My brother and sister who I haven't talked to in 20 years( they

> dis-owned me because I'm gay) hasn't called her in months and

> on Xmas didn't call or even send a card... " what kind of person does that?

> I'm so disappointed in how people acted it still to this day I just don't

> get it, How do you abandon your own mother? that's sick! I've been looking

> for a nursing home for my mom because I can't keep this up to much longer

> and I need to get my life back on track or I'll be in big trouble. Neither

> one of us has money and I feel terrible having to put her in a home but I

> have no choice, I'm all she has and if I don't take care of myself I'll end

> up sick and homeless. I try to stay positive but it's becoming more and

> more hard to do, that's why I joined this group in hopes that reading other

> peoples stories well give me strength. I had no idea there was such a group

> until

> a few days ago. I now know that I'm not alone. I wish the best to all of

> you in your journey and prayer for us all.

>

> Peaces Shanon

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks so much for the tips Kate, I have to put her in a home by next week and

I'm freaking out! Just curious is medicare the same as medicaid? and where would

I find the listing that medicare inspects? is it on their website...thanks so

much 

Shanon

 

 

________________________________

To: LBDcaregivers

Sent: Monday, April 2, 2012 6:41 AM

Subject: Re: MY FIRST POST

Hi, .

Recognizing the need for a nursing home is a huge first step.  For me, it

took some medical Drama and a lot of support before I could accept it.

Before anything else, go to www.medicare.gov and click on Facilities and

Doctors, then on Compare Nursing Homes.  Medicare conducts yearly (or is it

semi yearly) inspections of all nursing facilities and scores them in

several different areas.  You can find those that are considered the best

in you area, and you can determine who is the best in the areas you are

most concerned with.  The best often have waiting lists, so it is important

to get your mom's name in ASAP in as many as you would find acceptable.

Moving someone with dementia isn't always a good idea, but if you end up

with a nursing home that you really don't like, you can move to another if

necessary.  If you are concerned about paying for it, check into Medicaid

or other assistance right away.  My mom's Medicaid application took 6

months, but the nursing home was patient about it and waited for

reimbursement (it was retroactive to the date that Mom entered the

facility).  Start by checking the medicare.gov listings and then call the

county senior services ASAP to talk about help.

Best wishes.

Kate

> **

>

>

> My name is Shanon and I have lived in SF since 1990. In July 2010 my mom

> got very sick and ended up in a psych ward in Glendale , CA I flew down

> there and to my surprise the mom that I had just talked to 2 days before

> was completely different. She didn't know where she was, what state we were

> in and thought that she worked at the hospital..I was in shock! in Dec of

> that your 5 days before Christmas my mom was diagnosed with LBD. I had

> never heard of it before and didn't know what to expect or do, all I know

> was I had to be there for her. I went back home put my stuff in storage and

> came back and was there when she was released from the hospital and have

> been her sole caregiver 24/7 since July 30th 2010. This has been the

> hardest thing I have ever done in my life and not in a millions years did I

> think something like this could happen to my mom. She was a very healthy

> out going person. A massage therapist as well. It's been almost 2 years that

> I've been in LA and it's taking it's toll on me and unfortunately if your

> not rich, you pretty much screwed when it comes to help.

>

> I thought that my " so called family " would be there, but they haven't done

> a thing. My brother and sister who I haven't talked to in 20 years( they

> dis-owned me because I'm gay) hasn't called her in months and

> on Xmas didn't call or even send a card... " what kind of person does that?

> I'm so disappointed in how people acted it still to this day I just don't

> get it, How do you abandon your own mother? that's sick! I've been looking

> for a nursing home for my mom because I can't keep this up to much longer

> and I need to get my life back on track or I'll be in big trouble. Neither

> one of us has money and I feel terrible having to put her in a home but I

> have no choice, I'm all she has and if I don't take care of myself I'll end

> up sick and homeless. I try to stay positive but it's becoming more and

> more hard to do, that's why I joined this group in hopes that reading other

> peoples stories well give me strength. I had no idea there was such a group

> until

> a few days ago. I now know that I'm not alone. I wish the best to all of

> you in your journey and prayer for us all.

>

> Peaces Shanon

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Shanon,

I haven't been posting much lately, but I did want to welcome you to the group.

Please take care of yourself and allow yourself to rest and heal.

Regards from NY,

Helene

(Mom 78, 12 years with LBD - late stage)

> >> My name is Shanon and I have lived in SF since 1990. In July 2010 my mom

got very sick and ended up in a psych ward in Glendale , CA I flew down there

and to my surprise the mom that I had just talked to 2 days before was

completely different. She didn't know where she was, what state we were in and

thought that she worked at the hospital..I was in shock! in Dec of that your 5

days before Christmas my mom was diagnosed with LBD. I had never heard of it

before and didn't know what to expect or do, all I know was I had to be there

for her. I went back home put my stuff in storage and came back and was there

when she was released from the hospital and have been her sole caregiver 24/7

since July 30th 2010. This has been the hardest thing I have ever done in my

life and not in a millions years did I think something like this could happen to

my mom. She was a very healthy out going person. A massage therapist as well.

It's been almost 2 years that

> >> I've been in LA and it's taking it's toll on me and unfortunately if your

not rich, you pretty much screwed when it comes to help.

> >>

> >> I thought that my " so called family " would be there, but they haven't done

a thing. My brother and sister who I haven't talked to in 20 years( they

dis-owned me because I'm gay) hasn't called her in months and on Xmas didn't

call or even send a card... " what kind of person does that? I'm so disappointed

in how people acted it still to this day I just don't get it, How do you abandon

your own mother? that's sick! I've been looking for a nursing home for my mom

because I can't keep this up to much longer and I need to get my life back on

track or I'll be in big trouble. Neither one of us has money and I feel terrible

having to put her in a home but I have no choice, I'm all she has and if I don't

take care of myself I'll end up sick and homeless. I try to stay positive but

it's becoming more and more hard to do, that's why I joined this group in hopes

that reading other peoples stories well give me strength. I had no idea there

was such a group until

> >> a few days ago. I now know that I'm not alone. I wish the best to all of

you in your journey and prayer for us all.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Shanon,

I haven't been posting much lately, but I did want to welcome you to the group.

Please take care of yourself and allow yourself to rest and heal.

Regards from NY,

Helene

(Mom 78, 12 years with LBD - late stage)

> >> My name is Shanon and I have lived in SF since 1990. In July 2010 my mom

got very sick and ended up in a psych ward in Glendale , CA I flew down there

and to my surprise the mom that I had just talked to 2 days before was

completely different. She didn't know where she was, what state we were in and

thought that she worked at the hospital..I was in shock! in Dec of that your 5

days before Christmas my mom was diagnosed with LBD. I had never heard of it

before and didn't know what to expect or do, all I know was I had to be there

for her. I went back home put my stuff in storage and came back and was there

when she was released from the hospital and have been her sole caregiver 24/7

since July 30th 2010. This has been the hardest thing I have ever done in my

life and not in a millions years did I think something like this could happen to

my mom. She was a very healthy out going person. A massage therapist as well.

It's been almost 2 years that

> >> I've been in LA and it's taking it's toll on me and unfortunately if your

not rich, you pretty much screwed when it comes to help.

> >>

> >> I thought that my " so called family " would be there, but they haven't done

a thing. My brother and sister who I haven't talked to in 20 years( they

dis-owned me because I'm gay) hasn't called her in months and on Xmas didn't

call or even send a card... " what kind of person does that? I'm so disappointed

in how people acted it still to this day I just don't get it, How do you abandon

your own mother? that's sick! I've been looking for a nursing home for my mom

because I can't keep this up to much longer and I need to get my life back on

track or I'll be in big trouble. Neither one of us has money and I feel terrible

having to put her in a home but I have no choice, I'm all she has and if I don't

take care of myself I'll end up sick and homeless. I try to stay positive but

it's becoming more and more hard to do, that's why I joined this group in hopes

that reading other peoples stories well give me strength. I had no idea there

was such a group until

> >> a few days ago. I now know that I'm not alone. I wish the best to all of

you in your journey and prayer for us all.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Shanon,

I haven't been posting much lately, but I did want to welcome you to the group.

Please take care of yourself and allow yourself to rest and heal.

Regards from NY,

Helene

(Mom 78, 12 years with LBD - late stage)

> >> My name is Shanon and I have lived in SF since 1990. In July 2010 my mom

got very sick and ended up in a psych ward in Glendale , CA I flew down there

and to my surprise the mom that I had just talked to 2 days before was

completely different. She didn't know where she was, what state we were in and

thought that she worked at the hospital..I was in shock! in Dec of that your 5

days before Christmas my mom was diagnosed with LBD. I had never heard of it

before and didn't know what to expect or do, all I know was I had to be there

for her. I went back home put my stuff in storage and came back and was there

when she was released from the hospital and have been her sole caregiver 24/7

since July 30th 2010. This has been the hardest thing I have ever done in my

life and not in a millions years did I think something like this could happen to

my mom. She was a very healthy out going person. A massage therapist as well.

It's been almost 2 years that

> >> I've been in LA and it's taking it's toll on me and unfortunately if your

not rich, you pretty much screwed when it comes to help.

> >>

> >> I thought that my " so called family " would be there, but they haven't done

a thing. My brother and sister who I haven't talked to in 20 years( they

dis-owned me because I'm gay) hasn't called her in months and on Xmas didn't

call or even send a card... " what kind of person does that? I'm so disappointed

in how people acted it still to this day I just don't get it, How do you abandon

your own mother? that's sick! I've been looking for a nursing home for my mom

because I can't keep this up to much longer and I need to get my life back on

track or I'll be in big trouble. Neither one of us has money and I feel terrible

having to put her in a home but I have no choice, I'm all she has and if I don't

take care of myself I'll end up sick and homeless. I try to stay positive but

it's becoming more and more hard to do, that's why I joined this group in hopes

that reading other peoples stories well give me strength. I had no idea there

was such a group until

> >> a few days ago. I now know that I'm not alone. I wish the best to all of

you in your journey and prayer for us all.

> >

>