options for elderly

June 21, 2012

Hi group. I am in Phoenix helping my parents. My poor husband is at home

with friends checking on his condition with his LBD and FTD. My Dad is not

affected by any memory issues, thank goodness, but I do have a problem I am

hoping the group can help me with . My Dad is 80 and recently became

paralyzed from the waist down. It started about 3 weeks ago with

incontinence and then he lost feeling in his feet. One day he collapsed and

has never stood since. He had emergency surgery because his problem was

diagnosed as a pinched spinal cord (arthritis) and the prognosis was 50-50,

IF he did rigorous PT. I should also mention that due to many previous

surgeries and other issues, he is in chronic pain. That resulted in

addiction to prescription drugs.

So, here is was in a rehab facility screaming in pain at the PT and begging

for drugs. When they did not dope him to the level he wanted (he just wants

to be in a stupor and sleep) he started begging family to bring in drugs.

He realized he was not going to walk again, or regain continence because he

" could not do PT due to pain. " Real or imagined, we don't know but he

started telling everyone who would listen he wanted to die and it hurt too

much to do PT. Then he wanted family to give him enough drugs so he could

kill himself, but of course, we will not do it.

All his antics got him was a boot out of the rehab center. We learned

because of his loud protests and refusals to rehab there was nowhere else to

go but hospice since his insurance denied him anywhere else.

Mom is blind and cannot care for him at home, but much to his dismay, he is

not dying and despite numerous health issues, including cancer, he is

nowhere close to death.

So, what I need help with are options, if any. They really want him home,

but they cannot afford home care. I live 2500 miles away and with Len

having Lewy, I need my job and insurance, so I cannot help.. I have a full

plate already. I called senior services yesterday and although none of the

medical bills have come in yet, what they have in the bank disqualifies

them from almost all assistance except help with the insurance premium.

Hospice said they could help a few days a week with bathing, etc, but

speaking with others who used them, they do not really do that. Their

visits are short and they don't help. He is not a veteran. Due to being

blind, mom can't begin to keep him clean. Is there anything else I haven't

tried?

Your help and input would be much appreciated. This is uncharted territory

for me.

Thank you,

caregiver to Len, diagnosed with PD 12/10, LBD 1/12, FTD 5/12

June 21, 2012

,

What a lousy situation!

Will the insurance pay for an inpatient stay at a pain center? The Integrative

Pain Center of Arizona, in Tucson, has a great reputation. I'm guessing they

have an inpatient program but you can check. The American Pain Society

(ampainsoc.org) may have a list of inpatient pain programs. Hopefully they can

get the pain under control and then you'd have more options.

By " senior services, " do you mean the local agency on aging? They had no ideas

for you??

I'm surprised your father would be eligible for hospice.

Can you see an elder law attorney? Perhaps it's best if your parents get

divorced. Then maybe your dad would qualify for Medicaid?

Robin

>

> Hi group. I am in Phoenix helping my parents. My poor husband is at home

> with friends checking on his condition with his LBD and FTD. My Dad is not

> affected by any memory issues, thank goodness, but I do have a problem I am

> hoping the group can help me with . My Dad is 80 and recently became

> paralyzed from the waist down. It started about 3 weeks ago with

> incontinence and then he lost feeling in his feet. One day he collapsed and

> has never stood since. He had emergency surgery because his problem was

> diagnosed as a pinched spinal cord (arthritis) and the prognosis was 50-50,

> IF he did rigorous PT. I should also mention that due to many previous

> surgeries and other issues, he is in chronic pain. That resulted in

> addiction to prescription drugs.

>

> So, here is was in a rehab facility screaming in pain at the PT and begging

> for drugs. When they did not dope him to the level he wanted (he just wants

> to be in a stupor and sleep) he started begging family to bring in drugs.

> He realized he was not going to walk again, or regain continence because he

> " could not do PT due to pain. " Real or imagined, we don't know but he

> started telling everyone who would listen he wanted to die and it hurt too

> much to do PT. Then he wanted family to give him enough drugs so he could

> kill himself, but of course, we will not do it.

>

> All his antics got him was a boot out of the rehab center. We learned

> because of his loud protests and refusals to rehab there was nowhere else to

> go but hospice since his insurance denied him anywhere else.

>

> Mom is blind and cannot care for him at home, but much to his dismay, he is

> not dying and despite numerous health issues, including cancer, he is

> nowhere close to death.

>

> So, what I need help with are options, if any. They really want him home,

> but they cannot afford home care. I live 2500 miles away and with Len

> having Lewy, I need my job and insurance, so I cannot help.. I have a full

> plate already. I called senior services yesterday and although none of the

> medical bills have come in yet, what they have in the bank disqualifies

> them from almost all assistance except help with the insurance premium.

> Hospice said they could help a few days a week with bathing, etc, but

> speaking with others who used them, they do not really do that. Their

> visits are short and they don't help. He is not a veteran. Due to being

> blind, mom can't begin to keep him clean. Is there anything else I haven't

> tried?

>

> Your help and input would be much appreciated. This is uncharted territory

> for me.

>

> Thank you,

>

> caregiver to Len, diagnosed with PD 12/10, LBD 1/12, FTD 5/12

>

June 21, 2012