Re: RA putting a damper on things

[Guest guest]

I'm sure that my husband will commiserate with you. Unfortunately, for the

short time that I have been dealing with this, I have found this to be true.

What has worked for us is to try different times of day when I am not as sore

and/or tired. I think you also need to consider the depression side of RA. I

don't think I am depressed, but certainly have more blue days than I used to,

which makes activities even less desirable. I hope you guys are able to work

something out.

E <edmille3@...> wrote: Very often my wife is tired or

in pain. A motrein or two at night and

she goes to sleep. As far as any other nightly activites goes it is far

far far too few. Is this normal?

[Guest guest]

If you're talking about having sex...it depends on how you approach

it and her, my dear.

Keep in mind she's in pain. It hurts to move.

Why don't you treat her to a " spa " evening in bed.

Lots and lots of soft poofy pillows and down comforters.

Rose petals and soft music.

Warm oil and a soft, slow, gentle massage.

Lots of soft butterfly kisses and pillow talk.

You get what you give....

Good Luck

Shauna

As far as any other nightly activites goes it is far

> far far too few. Is this normal?

>

[Guest guest]

Hello

I assume your wife has RA. When you spend your day trying to forget how

much pain you are in. or how you will possibly be able to cook supper, much

less clean the house due to the fatigue that make you feel like you could go

to sleep and never wake up, yes it is very normal for her to loose interest

in " other nightly activities. Perhaps you should discuss with her or with

her physician.There are times with RA when even being touched is painful.

Please try to understand where she is coming from.

Heidi M

On Thu, Aug 21, 2008 at 3:02 PM, E <edmille3@...> wrote:

> Very often my wife is tired or in pain. A motrein or two at night and

> she goes to sleep. As far as any other nightly activites goes it is far

> far far too few. Is this normal?

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I'll agree with you, Heidi, and I see it from the man's point of view. Our

lives were 'normal' and went smoothly for many years. There were times when

either of us may have more to do before bedtime, getting the car painted for

a parade the next morning, take something apart because I promised, she was

tired or something else. Almost 20 years ago, I was struck down by the RA

but we stood together all this time, menopause, and for me too, I think, and

other problems taking our lives away more each day. We're still happy 43

years later doing all we want whenever we can. Of course there are lots of

down times and we have to play it like it's written.

Love isn't necessarily physical only, it's in our hearts most of all. When

we turn in for the night, we talk for up to an hour about anything or

nothing. That's how we make each other happy.

Dennis in eastexas

On Fri, Aug 22, 2008 at 3:19 PM, Heidi Mendelsohn <hmendelsohn@...>wrote:

> Hello

> I assume your wife has RA. When you spend your day trying to forget how

> much pain you are in. or how you will possibly be able to cook supper, much

> less clean the house due to the fatigue that make you feel like you could

> go

> to sleep and never wake up, yes it is very normal for her to loose interest

> in " other nightly activities. Perhaps you should discuss with her or with

> her physician.There are times with RA when even being touched is painful.

> Please try to understand where she is coming from.

> Heidi M

>

> On Thu, Aug 21, 2008 at 3:02 PM, E

<edmille3@...<edmille3%40optimum.net>>

> wrote:

>

> > Very often my wife is tired or in pain. A motrein or two at night and

> > she goes to sleep. As far as any other nightly activites goes it is far

> > far far too few. Is this normal?

> >

> >

> >

>

>

[Guest guest]

Dennis,....You said it all in your email, thanks for sharing. Tawny

[Guest guest]

Thanks, Tawny. I've going to wish you welcome back, but it's like all of us

at one time or another, I didn't take/have time to do it. A little late, but

welcome back and do as well as you can.

Dennis in eastexas

On Fri, Aug 22, 2008 at 8:47 PM, tdianaok <tdianaok@...> wrote:

> Dennis,....You said it all in your email, thanks for sharing. Tawny

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thanks Dennis:) We all know too well how we have our good and bad

days. My health is not good right now, and I just try to get by. Take

care, Tawny