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Hello,

New to group and in need of some help.

I am not only new to the group but to what real nutrition is. I have grown up

eating the wrong SAD (Standard American Diet) for most of my life. Shocked about

what I have learned about SAD is an understatement.

I am disgusted with the info yet grateful to be able to do something about it.

Here is my question.

Does anyone know or have a suggestion for treating abnormal menstrual

bleeding. (Sorry Guys).

Heavy bleeding for literally days and days.

I would appreciate any insight you may have to offer.

Thank You

Felicia

---------------------------------

Talk is cheap. Use Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls. Great rates

starting at 1 & cent;/min.

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Guest guest

As everybody here is probably sick of hearing, I'm on a salt/c

protocol for lyme disease. One of the things that members commented

on was that their menstrual irregularity was greatly helped -

including pms, cramps & heavy bleeding. We don't know why, but it

worked, and nobody wrote in to say it didn't work for them, either.

I guess you could try it. It is non-toxic.

Our ancestors used salt to preserve their foods so they used to eat

much more than we do now. The caveat is to only use natural salt

like RealSalt or Celtic Sea Salt. And humans and guinea pigs are

the only mammals that don't make their own vitamin C. The

recommended Daily Allowance is the minimum to prevent scurvy, not

the amount for ideal health which depends on how healthy you are and

the amount of toxins you have - vitamin C is good for ridding the

body of toxins, and it's a part of many enzymes.

The protocol is to take the salt & vitamin C at the same times, 4

times a day with a glass of water. Start at 1 gram a day and work

up until you hit a max of 12 grams (of course that's for lyme, I

think we noticed a difference around 5 - 6 grams a day of the salt &

C.

>

> Hello,

>

> New to group and in need of some help.

>

> I am not only new to the group but to what real nutrition is. I

have grown up eating the wrong SAD (Standard American Diet) for most

of my life. Shocked about what I have learned about SAD is an

understatement.

>

> I am disgusted with the info yet grateful to be able to do

something about it.

>

> Here is my question.

> Does anyone know or have a suggestion for treating abnormal

menstrual bleeding. (Sorry Guys).

> Heavy bleeding for literally days and days.

>

> I would appreciate any insight you may have to offer.

> Thank You

>

>

> Felicia

>

> ---------------------------------

> Talk is cheap. Use Messenger to make PC-to-Phone calls.

Great rates starting at 1 & cent;/min.

>

>

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When I get sick I take upwards of 20 grams a day, so I buy the

powdered form. You can mix it 2:1 with baking soda (non-aluminum)

to buffer the acidity and it pretty much loses the sour flavor and

the byproduct is carbon dioxide, so it's like seltzer water. Add

some fruit juice and you've got a nice spritzer. (I mix it in water

then add fruit juice - add it straight to oj and you get a foam

fountain!)

I think Vit. C is one that's hard to mess up, most of the major

brands are pretty good. Capsules are better than tablets, always,

though, since the cellulose they use to bind the ingredients in the

tablets is more for the machinery that makes them than for our

health and in some studies didn't dissolve very well upon

ingestion. Taking it with something that contains natural vitamin

c, like orange juice is said to boost its effectiveness.

- Renate

>

> >>>>. And humans and guinea pigs are

> the only mammals that don't make their own vitamin C. The

> recommended Daily Allowance is the minimum to prevent scurvy, not

> the amount for ideal health which depends on how healthy you are

and

> the amount of toxins you have - vitamin C is good for ridding the

> body of toxins, and it's a part of many enzymes. <<<<<<

>

> What vit C is good?(brand, kind, etc)

> ----------

>

> No virus found in this outgoing message.

> Checked by AVG Free Edition.

> Version: 7.1.385 / Virus Database: 268.4.1/307 - Release Date:

4/10/2006

>

>

>

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Guest guest

I experienced this for a few years and would be happy to discuss this with

you privately, if you would like to e-mail me.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Canfield

~We always grow in the direction in which we express ourselves.~

" The law of the Lord is perfect, converting the soul: the testimony of the

Lord is sure, making wise the simple. " Psalm 19:7

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  • 3 years later...
Guest guest

>

> Hi all,

>

> I'm new here, and I've just started listening to 's podcasts this week. I

am about 25 pounds overweight, which isn't a lot, but at this point I weigh more

than I ever have (unless pregnant). And, it has motivated me to think about my

relationship with food. said a couple of things that really hit home. One

was about how food can be a " bright spot " - I'd never heard anyone describe

exactly the way I use food before! Yes, it is my bright spot. My life has

always been very solitary and largely I don't mind it, but I do think food is

the friend that I turn to when I'm sad and it's the bright spot when I'm bored.

I'm beginning my search for a new bright spot - exploring drawing and crafts.

>

> But I have a question. also mentioned how some women use extra weight to

avoid attention from men. I believe that may be the reason that I tend to

sabatoge myself once I begin to really lose weight. I'll begin to visibly lose

it and start to look good, and then stop myself by overeating or stopping my

workouts. It makes me wonder why I'm afraid to look really good.

>

> So, here's my question, and I'm just hoping someone else here might have

experience with this. :-)...Is it possible that I fear attention from men not

because anything bad has happened to me (which it hasn't) but because my mom was

a survivor of childhood sexual abuse? She didn't begin recovery from that until

I was an adult, so I wonder if I could have subconsciously picked up her fears?

I distinctly remember her calling me an exhibitionist as a little girl and

telling me to cover up when my brother and dad were in the room. I was so

confused, and it stuck in my mind.

>

> If anyone has any thoughts on that, I'd really be grateful. And I'm glad to

have found this group.:-)

>

> Take care,

> Jo

>

Our parents' experiences influence us deeply. The things your mom said to you

implied that you can't trust mens' sexual impulses. Things you noticed about

the relationship your mom had with your dad also affect how you see yourself in

a relationship with a man. Therapy and IOWL podcasts sure help me have a

happier life!

Grateful For the Journey

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Hi Bonnie,

Thank you for your response. This seems like a really nice group!

I haven't gotten to the podcasts on self-limiting beliefs yet, but I should have

time to start there today. I appreciate the suggestion.

I'm not sure what to do about the fear of being attractive, and it's nice to

know I'm not alone on that. I hope the answers will continue to come along if

I'm patient and meet others like me.

I do have two young children who are both overweight, but not considered obese.

I have been hoping that if I can figure out what my issues are with food, I'll

be able to find a healthy way to get us all back on track. I'm sure just like I

picked up what my mom was doing, they're picking up what I'm doing. A little

frustrating, isn't it?? :-) Children are SO intuitive.

Take care,

Jo

>

> Hi Jo,

> Welcome. I've fallen off the wagon a bit in that I haven't listened to

> the podcasts in about 2 weeks but I've been ill. Food was (and

> probably still is a bit) of a bright spot for me and I don't know

> exactly what to do about that. I too think I have the fear of being

> attractive again, but I am obese right now. Have you listened to the

> episodes on self limiting beliefs? They may help

> Bonnie

> Thoughts become things. Choose the good ones.

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Guest guest

Hi composergrl1,

I appreciate your response to my post. You clarified some things for

me...especially the point about not trusting men's sexual impulses. That hadn't

occurred to me before.

It's funny how I could live with my own self for 38 years and not have realized

this before. I hope this is the beginning of the road toward some answers. :-) I

literally stumbled across the podcasts a few days ago, and I'm sure glad to have

found this group as well.

Take care,

Jo

> Our parents' experiences influence us deeply. The things your mom said to you

implied that you can't trust mens' sexual impulses. Things you noticed about

the relationship your mom had with your dad also affect how you see yourself in

a relationship with a man. Therapy and IOWL podcasts sure help me have a

happier life!

> Grateful For the Journey

>

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Guest guest

You are too kind--honestly, you made my day!

>

> Hi composergrl1,

>

> I appreciate your response to my post. You clarified some things for

me...especially the point about not trusting men's sexual impulses. That hadn't

occurred to me before.

>

> It's funny how I could live with my own self for 38 years and not have

realized this before. I hope this is the beginning of the road toward some

answers. :-) I literally stumbled across the podcasts a few days ago, and I'm

sure glad to have found this group as well.

>

> Take care,

> Jo

>

>

> > Our parents' experiences influence us deeply. The things your mom said to

you implied that you can't trust mens' sexual impulses. Things you noticed

about the relationship your mom had with your dad also affect how you see

yourself in a relationship with a man. Therapy and IOWL podcasts sure help me

have a happier life!

> > Grateful For the Journey

> >

>

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Guest guest

You are too kind--honestly, you made my day!

>

> Hi composergrl1,

>

> I appreciate your response to my post. You clarified some things for

me...especially the point about not trusting men's sexual impulses. That hadn't

occurred to me before.

>

> It's funny how I could live with my own self for 38 years and not have

realized this before. I hope this is the beginning of the road toward some

answers. :-) I literally stumbled across the podcasts a few days ago, and I'm

sure glad to have found this group as well.

>

> Take care,

> Jo

>

>

> > Our parents' experiences influence us deeply. The things your mom said to

you implied that you can't trust mens' sexual impulses. Things you noticed

about the relationship your mom had with your dad also affect how you see

yourself in a relationship with a man. Therapy and IOWL podcasts sure help me

have a happier life!

> > Grateful For the Journey

> >

>

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Guest guest

You are too kind--honestly, you made my day!

>

> Hi composergrl1,

>

> I appreciate your response to my post. You clarified some things for

me...especially the point about not trusting men's sexual impulses. That hadn't

occurred to me before.

>

> It's funny how I could live with my own self for 38 years and not have

realized this before. I hope this is the beginning of the road toward some

answers. :-) I literally stumbled across the podcasts a few days ago, and I'm

sure glad to have found this group as well.

>

> Take care,

> Jo

>

>

> > Our parents' experiences influence us deeply. The things your mom said to

you implied that you can't trust mens' sexual impulses. Things you noticed

about the relationship your mom had with your dad also affect how you see

yourself in a relationship with a man. Therapy and IOWL podcasts sure help me

have a happier life!

> > Grateful For the Journey

> >

>

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Guest guest

My childhood memories are few and fuzzy, but I so remember my mom getting

really upset with me when I was just about 5 years old because I was taking

my bathing suit off in front of my brother and his friend. He was 7 and we

shared a room... I thought nothing of it and doubt they did, but my mom hit

the roof and I remember that feeling of unfairness and having no idea why

she was upset. All I knew was I had done something bad and it involved

taking my clothes off and boys! lol it's a wonder I didn't turn out to be

a stripper! Anyway, I think mom was just a prude not a survivor of sexual

abuse... but she did have an alcoholic father and I feel that was her

biggest 'issue' cross to bear and affected all her relationships, including

food! Anyway, what's important is here and now and working with what we

have...

oxox

P

On Sat, Jun 6, 2009 at 7:50 AM, jlb_671 <brattenj@...> wrote:

>

>

> Hi all,

>

> I'm new here, and I've just started listening to 's podcasts this

> week. I am about 25 pounds overweight, which isn't a lot, but at this point

> I weigh more than I ever have (unless pregnant). And, it has motivated me to

> think about my relationship with food. said a couple of things that

> really hit home. One was about how food can be a " bright spot " - I'd never

> heard anyone describe exactly the way I use food before! Yes, it is my

> bright spot. My life has always been very solitary and largely I don't mind

> it, but I do think food is the friend that I turn to when I'm sad and it's

> the bright spot when I'm bored. I'm beginning my search for a new bright

> spot - exploring drawing and crafts.

>

> But I have a question. also mentioned how some women use extra weight

> to avoid attention from men. I believe that may be the reason that I tend to

> sabatoge myself once I begin to really lose weight. I'll begin to visibly

> lose it and start to look good, and then stop myself by overeating or

> stopping my workouts. It makes me wonder why I'm afraid to look really good.

>

>

> So, here's my question, and I'm just hoping someone else here might have

> experience with this. :-)...Is it possible that I fear attention from men

> not because anything bad has happened to me (which it hasn't) but because my

> mom was a survivor of childhood sexual abuse? She didn't begin recovery from

> that until I was an adult, so I wonder if I could have subconsciously picked

> up her fears? I distinctly remember her calling me an exhibitionist as a

> little girl and telling me to cover up when my brother and dad were in the

> room. I was so confused, and it stuck in my mind.

>

> If anyone has any thoughts on that, I'd really be grateful. And I'm glad to

> have found this group.:-)

>

> Take care,

> Jo

>

>

>

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Guest guest

My childhood memories are few and fuzzy, but I so remember my mom getting

really upset with me when I was just about 5 years old because I was taking

my bathing suit off in front of my brother and his friend. He was 7 and we

shared a room... I thought nothing of it and doubt they did, but my mom hit

the roof and I remember that feeling of unfairness and having no idea why

she was upset. All I knew was I had done something bad and it involved

taking my clothes off and boys! lol it's a wonder I didn't turn out to be

a stripper! Anyway, I think mom was just a prude not a survivor of sexual

abuse... but she did have an alcoholic father and I feel that was her

biggest 'issue' cross to bear and affected all her relationships, including

food! Anyway, what's important is here and now and working with what we

have...

oxox

P

On Sat, Jun 6, 2009 at 7:50 AM, jlb_671 <brattenj@...> wrote:

>

>

> Hi all,

>

> I'm new here, and I've just started listening to 's podcasts this

> week. I am about 25 pounds overweight, which isn't a lot, but at this point

> I weigh more than I ever have (unless pregnant). And, it has motivated me to

> think about my relationship with food. said a couple of things that

> really hit home. One was about how food can be a " bright spot " - I'd never

> heard anyone describe exactly the way I use food before! Yes, it is my

> bright spot. My life has always been very solitary and largely I don't mind

> it, but I do think food is the friend that I turn to when I'm sad and it's

> the bright spot when I'm bored. I'm beginning my search for a new bright

> spot - exploring drawing and crafts.

>

> But I have a question. also mentioned how some women use extra weight

> to avoid attention from men. I believe that may be the reason that I tend to

> sabatoge myself once I begin to really lose weight. I'll begin to visibly

> lose it and start to look good, and then stop myself by overeating or

> stopping my workouts. It makes me wonder why I'm afraid to look really good.

>

>

> So, here's my question, and I'm just hoping someone else here might have

> experience with this. :-)...Is it possible that I fear attention from men

> not because anything bad has happened to me (which it hasn't) but because my

> mom was a survivor of childhood sexual abuse? She didn't begin recovery from

> that until I was an adult, so I wonder if I could have subconsciously picked

> up her fears? I distinctly remember her calling me an exhibitionist as a

> little girl and telling me to cover up when my brother and dad were in the

> room. I was so confused, and it stuck in my mind.

>

> If anyone has any thoughts on that, I'd really be grateful. And I'm glad to

> have found this group.:-)

>

> Take care,

> Jo

>

>

>

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Guest guest

My childhood memories are few and fuzzy, but I so remember my mom getting

really upset with me when I was just about 5 years old because I was taking

my bathing suit off in front of my brother and his friend. He was 7 and we

shared a room... I thought nothing of it and doubt they did, but my mom hit

the roof and I remember that feeling of unfairness and having no idea why

she was upset. All I knew was I had done something bad and it involved

taking my clothes off and boys! lol it's a wonder I didn't turn out to be

a stripper! Anyway, I think mom was just a prude not a survivor of sexual

abuse... but she did have an alcoholic father and I feel that was her

biggest 'issue' cross to bear and affected all her relationships, including

food! Anyway, what's important is here and now and working with what we

have...

oxox

P

On Sat, Jun 6, 2009 at 7:50 AM, jlb_671 <brattenj@...> wrote:

>

>

> Hi all,

>

> I'm new here, and I've just started listening to 's podcasts this

> week. I am about 25 pounds overweight, which isn't a lot, but at this point

> I weigh more than I ever have (unless pregnant). And, it has motivated me to

> think about my relationship with food. said a couple of things that

> really hit home. One was about how food can be a " bright spot " - I'd never

> heard anyone describe exactly the way I use food before! Yes, it is my

> bright spot. My life has always been very solitary and largely I don't mind

> it, but I do think food is the friend that I turn to when I'm sad and it's

> the bright spot when I'm bored. I'm beginning my search for a new bright

> spot - exploring drawing and crafts.

>

> But I have a question. also mentioned how some women use extra weight

> to avoid attention from men. I believe that may be the reason that I tend to

> sabatoge myself once I begin to really lose weight. I'll begin to visibly

> lose it and start to look good, and then stop myself by overeating or

> stopping my workouts. It makes me wonder why I'm afraid to look really good.

>

>

> So, here's my question, and I'm just hoping someone else here might have

> experience with this. :-)...Is it possible that I fear attention from men

> not because anything bad has happened to me (which it hasn't) but because my

> mom was a survivor of childhood sexual abuse? She didn't begin recovery from

> that until I was an adult, so I wonder if I could have subconsciously picked

> up her fears? I distinctly remember her calling me an exhibitionist as a

> little girl and telling me to cover up when my brother and dad were in the

> room. I was so confused, and it stuck in my mind.

>

> If anyone has any thoughts on that, I'd really be grateful. And I'm glad to

> have found this group.:-)

>

> Take care,

> Jo

>

>

>

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Guest guest

I had an alcoholic father and it does color every fiber of your being.

Bonnie

Thoughts become things. Choose the good ones.

On Jun 8, 2009, at 10:15 PM, Patti Westbrook wrote:

> My childhood memories are few and fuzzy, but I so remember my mom

> getting

> really upset with me when I was just about 5 years old because I was

> taking

> my bathing suit off in front of my brother and his friend. He was 7

> and we

> shared a room... I thought nothing of it and doubt they did, but my

> mom hit

> the roof and I remember that feeling of unfairness and having no

> idea why

> she was upset. All I knew was I had done something bad and it

> involved

> taking my clothes off and boys! lol it's a wonder I didn't turn

> out to be

> a stripper! Anyway, I think mom was just a prude not a survivor of

> sexual

> abuse... but she did have an alcoholic father and I feel that was her

> biggest 'issue' cross to bear and affected all her relationships,

> including

> food! Anyway, what's important is here and now and working with

> what we

> have...

> oxox

> P

>

> On Sat, Jun 6, 2009 at 7:50 AM, jlb_671 <brattenj@...> wrote:

>

>>

>>

>> Hi all,

>>

>> I'm new here, and I've just started listening to 's podcasts

>> this

>> week. I am about 25 pounds overweight, which isn't a lot, but at

>> this point

>> I weigh more than I ever have (unless pregnant). And, it has

>> motivated me to

>> think about my relationship with food. said a couple of

>> things that

>> really hit home. One was about how food can be a " bright spot " -

>> I'd never

>> heard anyone describe exactly the way I use food before! Yes, it is

>> my

>> bright spot. My life has always been very solitary and largely I

>> don't mind

>> it, but I do think food is the friend that I turn to when I'm sad

>> and it's

>> the bright spot when I'm bored. I'm beginning my search for a new

>> bright

>> spot - exploring drawing and crafts.

>>

>> But I have a question. also mentioned how some women use

>> extra weight

>> to avoid attention from men. I believe that may be the reason that

>> I tend to

>> sabatoge myself once I begin to really lose weight. I'll begin to

>> visibly

>> lose it and start to look good, and then stop myself by overeating or

>> stopping my workouts. It makes me wonder why I'm afraid to look

>> really good.

>>

>>

>> So, here's my question, and I'm just hoping someone else here might

>> have

>> experience with this. :-)...Is it possible that I fear attention

>> from men

>> not because anything bad has happened to me (which it hasn't) but

>> because my

>> mom was a survivor of childhood sexual abuse? She didn't begin

>> recovery from

>> that until I was an adult, so I wonder if I could have

>> subconsciously picked

>> up her fears? I distinctly remember her calling me an exhibitionist

>> as a

>> little girl and telling me to cover up when my brother and dad were

>> in the

>> room. I was so confused, and it stuck in my mind.

>>

>> If anyone has any thoughts on that, I'd really be grateful. And I'm

>> glad to

>> have found this group.:-)

>>

>> Take care,

>> Jo

>>

>>

>>

>

>

>

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Hi Patti, all,

I agree with your last statement: " what's important is here and now and

working with what we have. " So, maybe I've learned that I picked up some

limiting beliefs from my mom subconsciously, but now what do I do with that

information?

I listened to some of the self-limiting beliefs podcasts yesterday. I guess

is saying that it's as simple as recognizing the limiting belief

consciously, and then creating a new positive belief. I suppose once you

create a new one, then it's a matter of making it an affirmation that is

repeated until it sticks.

I've been thinking about this whole thing more since I wrote the other day.

I'm honestly afraid of the attention of strangers...literally afraid that I

will be physically hurt by someone if I would lose the weight. It seems like

a really unreasonable fear. I've definitely had normal relationships with

men, but those have been with people I got to know and trust through work or

other activities. I never date men who are normal weight or are overly

motivated to stay in shape. That way, I don't have to be the perfect weight

(because they aren't) and they'll still find me attractive.

It's this odd fear of strangers that's kind of funny to recognize in myself.

For example, I remember standing in line at the grocery store when I was 19.

I was in the best shape of my life, and I had on a short dress (a departure

for me) to go to a friend's graduation party. I remember being uncomfortable

that the men were looking, and the guy behind me said a woman as beautiful

as me shouldn't have to buy myself flowers (I was actually buying them for

my graduating friend). The entire interaction freaked me out. I didn't have

the confidence to feel safe in that body AT ALL. On some level, I also felt

that I shouldn't have dressed that way if I didn't want the attention. I'm a

lot older now, and I'm thinking I probably have the confidence to handle

these kinds of situations, but I just haven't brought this stuff to the

surface to really look at it unitl now.

So, I'm not sure, but I'm thinking that if I come up with an affirmation

that I can repeat, it might work to change this irrational fear. :-)

Take care,

Jo

On Mon, Jun 8, 2009 at 10:15 PM, Patti Westbrook <pwestbrook@...>wrote:

>

>

> My childhood memories are few and fuzzy, but I so remember my mom getting

> really upset with me when I was just about 5 years old because I was taking

> my bathing suit off in front of my brother and his friend. He was 7 and we

> shared a room... I thought nothing of it and doubt they did, but my mom hit

> the roof and I remember that feeling of unfairness and having no idea why

> she was upset. All I knew was I had done something bad and it involved

> taking my clothes off and boys! lol it's a wonder I didn't turn out to be

> a stripper! Anyway, I think mom was just a prude not a survivor of sexual

> abuse... but she did have an alcoholic father and I feel that was her

> biggest 'issue' cross to bear and affected all her relationships, including

> food! Anyway, what's important is here and now and working with what we

> have...

> oxox

> P

>

>

> On Sat, Jun 6, 2009 at 7:50 AM, jlb_671

<brattenj@...<brattenj%40gmail.com>>

> wrote:

>

> >

> >

> > Hi all,

> >

> > I'm new here, and I've just started listening to 's podcasts this

> > week. I am about 25 pounds overweight, which isn't a lot, but at this

> point

> > I weigh more than I ever have (unless pregnant). And, it has motivated me

> to

> > think about my relationship with food. said a couple of things that

> > really hit home. One was about how food can be a " bright spot " - I'd

> never

> > heard anyone describe exactly the way I use food before! Yes, it is my

> > bright spot. My life has always been very solitary and largely I don't

> mind

> > it, but I do think food is the friend that I turn to when I'm sad and

> it's

> > the bright spot when I'm bored. I'm beginning my search for a new bright

> > spot - exploring drawing and crafts.

> >

> > But I have a question. also mentioned how some women use extra

> weight

> > to avoid attention from men. I believe that may be the reason that I tend

> to

> > sabatoge myself once I begin to really lose weight. I'll begin to visibly

> > lose it and start to look good, and then stop myself by overeating or

> > stopping my workouts. It makes me wonder why I'm afraid to look really

> good.

> >

> >

> > So, here's my question, and I'm just hoping someone else here might have

> > experience with this. :-)...Is it possible that I fear attention from men

> > not because anything bad has happened to me (which it hasn't) but because

> my

> > mom was a survivor of childhood sexual abuse? She didn't begin recovery

> from

> > that until I was an adult, so I wonder if I could have subconsciously

> picked

> > up her fears? I distinctly remember her calling me an exhibitionist as a

> > little girl and telling me to cover up when my brother and dad were in

> the

> > room. I was so confused, and it stuck in my mind.

> >

> > If anyone has any thoughts on that, I'd really be grateful. And I'm glad

> to

> > have found this group.:-)

> >

> > Take care,

> > Jo

> >

> >

> >

>

>

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Guest guest

Hi Patti, all,

I agree with your last statement: " what's important is here and now and

working with what we have. " So, maybe I've learned that I picked up some

limiting beliefs from my mom subconsciously, but now what do I do with that

information?

I listened to some of the self-limiting beliefs podcasts yesterday. I guess

is saying that it's as simple as recognizing the limiting belief

consciously, and then creating a new positive belief. I suppose once you

create a new one, then it's a matter of making it an affirmation that is

repeated until it sticks.

I've been thinking about this whole thing more since I wrote the other day.

I'm honestly afraid of the attention of strangers...literally afraid that I

will be physically hurt by someone if I would lose the weight. It seems like

a really unreasonable fear. I've definitely had normal relationships with

men, but those have been with people I got to know and trust through work or

other activities. I never date men who are normal weight or are overly

motivated to stay in shape. That way, I don't have to be the perfect weight

(because they aren't) and they'll still find me attractive.

It's this odd fear of strangers that's kind of funny to recognize in myself.

For example, I remember standing in line at the grocery store when I was 19.

I was in the best shape of my life, and I had on a short dress (a departure

for me) to go to a friend's graduation party. I remember being uncomfortable

that the men were looking, and the guy behind me said a woman as beautiful

as me shouldn't have to buy myself flowers (I was actually buying them for

my graduating friend). The entire interaction freaked me out. I didn't have

the confidence to feel safe in that body AT ALL. On some level, I also felt

that I shouldn't have dressed that way if I didn't want the attention. I'm a

lot older now, and I'm thinking I probably have the confidence to handle

these kinds of situations, but I just haven't brought this stuff to the

surface to really look at it unitl now.

So, I'm not sure, but I'm thinking that if I come up with an affirmation

that I can repeat, it might work to change this irrational fear. :-)

Take care,

Jo

On Mon, Jun 8, 2009 at 10:15 PM, Patti Westbrook <pwestbrook@...>wrote:

>

>

> My childhood memories are few and fuzzy, but I so remember my mom getting

> really upset with me when I was just about 5 years old because I was taking

> my bathing suit off in front of my brother and his friend. He was 7 and we

> shared a room... I thought nothing of it and doubt they did, but my mom hit

> the roof and I remember that feeling of unfairness and having no idea why

> she was upset. All I knew was I had done something bad and it involved

> taking my clothes off and boys! lol it's a wonder I didn't turn out to be

> a stripper! Anyway, I think mom was just a prude not a survivor of sexual

> abuse... but she did have an alcoholic father and I feel that was her

> biggest 'issue' cross to bear and affected all her relationships, including

> food! Anyway, what's important is here and now and working with what we

> have...

> oxox

> P

>

>

> On Sat, Jun 6, 2009 at 7:50 AM, jlb_671

<brattenj@...<brattenj%40gmail.com>>

> wrote:

>

> >

> >

> > Hi all,

> >

> > I'm new here, and I've just started listening to 's podcasts this

> > week. I am about 25 pounds overweight, which isn't a lot, but at this

> point

> > I weigh more than I ever have (unless pregnant). And, it has motivated me

> to

> > think about my relationship with food. said a couple of things that

> > really hit home. One was about how food can be a " bright spot " - I'd

> never

> > heard anyone describe exactly the way I use food before! Yes, it is my

> > bright spot. My life has always been very solitary and largely I don't

> mind

> > it, but I do think food is the friend that I turn to when I'm sad and

> it's

> > the bright spot when I'm bored. I'm beginning my search for a new bright

> > spot - exploring drawing and crafts.

> >

> > But I have a question. also mentioned how some women use extra

> weight

> > to avoid attention from men. I believe that may be the reason that I tend

> to

> > sabatoge myself once I begin to really lose weight. I'll begin to visibly

> > lose it and start to look good, and then stop myself by overeating or

> > stopping my workouts. It makes me wonder why I'm afraid to look really

> good.

> >

> >

> > So, here's my question, and I'm just hoping someone else here might have

> > experience with this. :-)...Is it possible that I fear attention from men

> > not because anything bad has happened to me (which it hasn't) but because

> my

> > mom was a survivor of childhood sexual abuse? She didn't begin recovery

> from

> > that until I was an adult, so I wonder if I could have subconsciously

> picked

> > up her fears? I distinctly remember her calling me an exhibitionist as a

> > little girl and telling me to cover up when my brother and dad were in

> the

> > room. I was so confused, and it stuck in my mind.

> >

> > If anyone has any thoughts on that, I'd really be grateful. And I'm glad

> to

> > have found this group.:-)

> >

> > Take care,

> > Jo

> >

> >

> >

>

>

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Guest guest

Jo,

Maybe it's time to talk to a professional. I don't remember if you

said that you did that or not. As far as limiting beliefs, BOY do i

have ALOT of them and I battle them every day. Maybe I shouldn't be

battling them, just accepting them and trying to replace them?

Bonnie

Thoughts become things. Choose the good ones.

On Jun 10, 2009, at 11:06 AM, JBratten wrote:

> Hi Patti, all,

>

> I agree with your last statement: " what's important is here and now

> and

> working with what we have. " So, maybe I've learned that I picked up

> some

> limiting beliefs from my mom subconsciously, but now what do I do

> with that

> information?

>

> I listened to some of the self-limiting beliefs podcasts yesterday.

> I guess

> is saying that it's as simple as recognizing the limiting belief

> consciously, and then creating a new positive belief. I suppose once

> you

> create a new one, then it's a matter of making it an affirmation

> that is

> repeated until it sticks.

>

> I've been thinking about this whole thing more since I wrote the

> other day.

> I'm honestly afraid of the attention of strangers...literally afraid

> that I

> will be physically hurt by someone if I would lose the weight. It

> seems like

> a really unreasonable fear. I've definitely had normal relationships

> with

> men, but those have been with people I got to know and trust through

> work or

> other activities. I never date men who are normal weight or are overly

> motivated to stay in shape. That way, I don't have to be the perfect

> weight

> (because they aren't) and they'll still find me attractive.

>

> It's this odd fear of strangers that's kind of funny to recognize in

> myself.

> For example, I remember standing in line at the grocery store when I

> was 19.

> I was in the best shape of my life, and I had on a short dress (a

> departure

> for me) to go to a friend's graduation party. I remember being

> uncomfortable

> that the men were looking, and the guy behind me said a woman as

> beautiful

> as me shouldn't have to buy myself flowers (I was actually buying

> them for

> my graduating friend). The entire interaction freaked me out. I

> didn't have

> the confidence to feel safe in that body AT ALL. On some level, I

> also felt

> that I shouldn't have dressed that way if I didn't want the

> attention. I'm a

> lot older now, and I'm thinking I probably have the confidence to

> handle

> these kinds of situations, but I just haven't brought this stuff to

> the

> surface to really look at it unitl now.

>

> So, I'm not sure, but I'm thinking that if I come up with an

> affirmation

> that I can repeat, it might work to change this irrational fear. :-)

>

> Take care,

> Jo

>

> On Mon, Jun 8, 2009 at 10:15 PM, Patti Westbrook

> <pwestbrook@...>wrote:

>

>>

>>

>> My childhood memories are few and fuzzy, but I so remember my mom

>> getting

>> really upset with me when I was just about 5 years old because I

>> was taking

>> my bathing suit off in front of my brother and his friend. He was 7

>> and we

>> shared a room... I thought nothing of it and doubt they did, but my

>> mom hit

>> the roof and I remember that feeling of unfairness and having no

>> idea why

>> she was upset. All I knew was I had done something bad and it

>> involved

>> taking my clothes off and boys! lol it's a wonder I didn't turn out

>> to be

>> a stripper! Anyway, I think mom was just a prude not a survivor of

>> sexual

>> abuse... but she did have an alcoholic father and I feel that was her

>> biggest 'issue' cross to bear and affected all her relationships,

>> including

>> food! Anyway, what's important is here and now and working with

>> what we

>> have...

>> oxox

>> P

>>

>>

>> On Sat, Jun 6, 2009 at 7:50 AM, jlb_671 <brattenj@...<brattenj

>> %40gmail.com>>

>> wrote:

>>

>>>

>>>

>>> Hi all,

>>>

>>> I'm new here, and I've just started listening to 's podcasts

>>> this

>>> week. I am about 25 pounds overweight, which isn't a lot, but at

>>> this

>> point

>>> I weigh more than I ever have (unless pregnant). And, it has

>>> motivated me

>> to

>>> think about my relationship with food. said a couple of

>>> things that

>>> really hit home. One was about how food can be a " bright spot " - I'd

>> never

>>> heard anyone describe exactly the way I use food before! Yes, it

>>> is my

>>> bright spot. My life has always been very solitary and largely I

>>> don't

>> mind

>>> it, but I do think food is the friend that I turn to when I'm sad

>>> and

>> it's

>>> the bright spot when I'm bored. I'm beginning my search for a new

>>> bright

>>> spot - exploring drawing and crafts.

>>>

>>> But I have a question. also mentioned how some women use extra

>> weight

>>> to avoid attention from men. I believe that may be the reason that

>>> I tend

>> to

>>> sabatoge myself once I begin to really lose weight. I'll begin to

>>> visibly

>>> lose it and start to look good, and then stop myself by overeating

>>> or

>>> stopping my workouts. It makes me wonder why I'm afraid to look

>>> really

>> good.

>>>

>>>

>>> So, here's my question, and I'm just hoping someone else here

>>> might have

>>> experience with this. :-)...Is it possible that I fear attention

>>> from men

>>> not because anything bad has happened to me (which it hasn't) but

>>> because

>> my

>>> mom was a survivor of childhood sexual abuse? She didn't begin

>>> recovery

>> from

>>> that until I was an adult, so I wonder if I could have

>>> subconsciously

>> picked

>>> up her fears? I distinctly remember her calling me an

>>> exhibitionist as a

>>> little girl and telling me to cover up when my brother and dad

>>> were in

>> the

>>> room. I was so confused, and it stuck in my mind.

>>>

>>> If anyone has any thoughts on that, I'd really be grateful. And

>>> I'm glad

>> to

>>> have found this group.:-)

>>>

>>> Take care,

>>> Jo

>>>

>>>

>>>

>>

>>

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Share on other sites

Guest guest

Jo,

Maybe it's time to talk to a professional. I don't remember if you

said that you did that or not. As far as limiting beliefs, BOY do i

have ALOT of them and I battle them every day. Maybe I shouldn't be

battling them, just accepting them and trying to replace them?

Bonnie

Thoughts become things. Choose the good ones.

On Jun 10, 2009, at 11:06 AM, JBratten wrote:

> Hi Patti, all,

>

> I agree with your last statement: " what's important is here and now

> and

> working with what we have. " So, maybe I've learned that I picked up

> some

> limiting beliefs from my mom subconsciously, but now what do I do

> with that

> information?

>

> I listened to some of the self-limiting beliefs podcasts yesterday.

> I guess

> is saying that it's as simple as recognizing the limiting belief

> consciously, and then creating a new positive belief. I suppose once

> you

> create a new one, then it's a matter of making it an affirmation

> that is

> repeated until it sticks.

>

> I've been thinking about this whole thing more since I wrote the

> other day.

> I'm honestly afraid of the attention of strangers...literally afraid

> that I

> will be physically hurt by someone if I would lose the weight. It

> seems like

> a really unreasonable fear. I've definitely had normal relationships

> with

> men, but those have been with people I got to know and trust through

> work or

> other activities. I never date men who are normal weight or are overly

> motivated to stay in shape. That way, I don't have to be the perfect

> weight

> (because they aren't) and they'll still find me attractive.

>

> It's this odd fear of strangers that's kind of funny to recognize in

> myself.

> For example, I remember standing in line at the grocery store when I

> was 19.

> I was in the best shape of my life, and I had on a short dress (a

> departure

> for me) to go to a friend's graduation party. I remember being

> uncomfortable

> that the men were looking, and the guy behind me said a woman as

> beautiful

> as me shouldn't have to buy myself flowers (I was actually buying

> them for

> my graduating friend). The entire interaction freaked me out. I

> didn't have

> the confidence to feel safe in that body AT ALL. On some level, I

> also felt

> that I shouldn't have dressed that way if I didn't want the

> attention. I'm a

> lot older now, and I'm thinking I probably have the confidence to

> handle

> these kinds of situations, but I just haven't brought this stuff to

> the

> surface to really look at it unitl now.

>

> So, I'm not sure, but I'm thinking that if I come up with an

> affirmation

> that I can repeat, it might work to change this irrational fear. :-)

>

> Take care,

> Jo

>

> On Mon, Jun 8, 2009 at 10:15 PM, Patti Westbrook

> <pwestbrook@...>wrote:

>

>>

>>

>> My childhood memories are few and fuzzy, but I so remember my mom

>> getting

>> really upset with me when I was just about 5 years old because I

>> was taking

>> my bathing suit off in front of my brother and his friend. He was 7

>> and we

>> shared a room... I thought nothing of it and doubt they did, but my

>> mom hit

>> the roof and I remember that feeling of unfairness and having no

>> idea why

>> she was upset. All I knew was I had done something bad and it

>> involved

>> taking my clothes off and boys! lol it's a wonder I didn't turn out

>> to be

>> a stripper! Anyway, I think mom was just a prude not a survivor of

>> sexual

>> abuse... but she did have an alcoholic father and I feel that was her

>> biggest 'issue' cross to bear and affected all her relationships,

>> including

>> food! Anyway, what's important is here and now and working with

>> what we

>> have...

>> oxox

>> P

>>

>>

>> On Sat, Jun 6, 2009 at 7:50 AM, jlb_671 <brattenj@...<brattenj

>> %40gmail.com>>

>> wrote:

>>

>>>

>>>

>>> Hi all,

>>>

>>> I'm new here, and I've just started listening to 's podcasts

>>> this

>>> week. I am about 25 pounds overweight, which isn't a lot, but at

>>> this

>> point

>>> I weigh more than I ever have (unless pregnant). And, it has

>>> motivated me

>> to

>>> think about my relationship with food. said a couple of

>>> things that

>>> really hit home. One was about how food can be a " bright spot " - I'd

>> never

>>> heard anyone describe exactly the way I use food before! Yes, it

>>> is my

>>> bright spot. My life has always been very solitary and largely I

>>> don't

>> mind

>>> it, but I do think food is the friend that I turn to when I'm sad

>>> and

>> it's

>>> the bright spot when I'm bored. I'm beginning my search for a new

>>> bright

>>> spot - exploring drawing and crafts.

>>>

>>> But I have a question. also mentioned how some women use extra

>> weight

>>> to avoid attention from men. I believe that may be the reason that

>>> I tend

>> to

>>> sabatoge myself once I begin to really lose weight. I'll begin to

>>> visibly

>>> lose it and start to look good, and then stop myself by overeating

>>> or

>>> stopping my workouts. It makes me wonder why I'm afraid to look

>>> really

>> good.

>>>

>>>

>>> So, here's my question, and I'm just hoping someone else here

>>> might have

>>> experience with this. :-)...Is it possible that I fear attention

>>> from men

>>> not because anything bad has happened to me (which it hasn't) but

>>> because

>> my

>>> mom was a survivor of childhood sexual abuse? She didn't begin

>>> recovery

>> from

>>> that until I was an adult, so I wonder if I could have

>>> subconsciously

>> picked

>>> up her fears? I distinctly remember her calling me an

>>> exhibitionist as a

>>> little girl and telling me to cover up when my brother and dad

>>> were in

>> the

>>> room. I was so confused, and it stuck in my mind.

>>>

>>> If anyone has any thoughts on that, I'd really be grateful. And

>>> I'm glad

>> to

>>> have found this group.:-)

>>>

>>> Take care,

>>> Jo

>>>

>>>

>>>

>>

>>

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