Re: Breakdown

[Guest guest]

Hey sweetie, I'm right here. Talk to me. I'm in a bad place myself. YOu have

to take your meds and take care of your body first, and everything else

comes second. I'm sending you some pictures of my pups off line - I swear

sometimes those dogs are the only thing that gets me up in the morning. And

my other advice is to move - you have to work out to get your endorphines up

so you can survive the bad times. Hugs, gs

> I'm having a real tough time of it today. I had a very intense

> conversation with a friend last night over a few drinks (yeah yeah alkeehal

> is the devil). She was abused too and had a tough time of it. She's my age

> and it still affects her. Of course to myself I say " well, she was abused

> ever so much more than me " because there were physical signs. Abuse is

> abuse right? So why do I underplay my abuse?

> I've forgotten to take my meds for the past week or so. I had a complete

> breakdown last night. I popped my pill this afternoon but of course it'll

> take a few days to kick back in. Why do I do this? If B weren't here I'd

> be so completely lost right now.

> A day later and I'm still horribly depressed over my breakdown last night.

> I'm embarrassed and ashamed. I should be able to handle this. I don't know

> why I can't.

> Amy

>

>

[Guest guest]

Don't be so hard on yourself. Abuse is abuse and part of the problem is that we

need our abusers to take responsibility and admit that what they did to us was

wrong. NOT GONNA HAPPEN. So now what? First admit that your abuse is just as

significant as anyone elses. This is not a competition on who got hurt worse.

That is a BPD tactic, that is not a survivors tactic. Whatever was done to you

was done without your consent and everything else is just degrees of magnitude.

The violation remains the same. You do not need to feel inferior just because

you don't bear physical scars. It will always affect you. You have to give up

trying to make is go away and try to find a way to live with it so that you can

move on and be happy that you SURVIVED it..

Look at it this way, maybe you needed a breakdown in order to rebuild your soul.

Sort of like a spiritual renovation. Get back up, remember to take the meds and

go forward. It sucks that we are KOs. We shouldn't have to be in this position.

There is aways someone who has it worse off than we do. The point is to keep

moving forward.

Be strong

Breakdown

I'm having a real tough time of it today.  I had a very intense conversation

with a friend last night over a few drinks (yeah yeah alkeehal is the devil). 

She was abused too and had a tough time of it.  She's my age and it still

affects her.  Of course to myself I say " well, she was abused ever so much more

than me " because there were physical signs.  Abuse is abuse right? So why do I

underplay my abuse?

I've forgotten to take my meds for the past week or so.  I had a complete

breakdown last night. I popped my pill this afternoon but of course it'll take a

few days to kick back in.  Why do I do this?  If B weren't here I'd be so

completely lost right now. 

A day later and I'm still horribly depressed over my breakdown last night. I'm

embarrassed and ashamed.  I should be able to handle this.  I don't know why I

can't.

Amy