The Cops are on their way here now.

[Guest guest]

well. just as posted yesterday. my MOTHER took my son shopping

yesterday. she bought all three of my children a few things each. but

just as i predicted...today was payback. after work i took my same son

to visit a friend at the funeral home her, grandfather had past away.

as soon as we got home, i could tell by the crazy ass look in her eyes

that it was on. she demanded money that i supposedly owe her, i said

you know, i don't really want to talk right now until you calm down.

she went nuts. telling me what a sorry mother i am etc. my son 16yrs

old got really upset...my 5 year old was crying.. it was bad. He was

verbally defending me,,just telling her to stop it and leave me alone.

she smacked at his face a couple of time,,missing thank god. he was so

angry at so much of this going on so often and because she had finally

pushed me to tears, i have been strong for so long now, but i finally

broke down, he took a knife and stuck it in her trunk. OMG. she lost

it now. so...we have told them (the cops our story) shes been talking

to them forever. we are just sitting oun the porch waiting,,you know

they need a shelter for families abused by BPD Mothers/grandmothers.

lord how i wish i had somewhere to go.

[Guest guest]

There might not be a specific home for those of us who have been

abused by BPD family, but there can be lots of other community

supports. It sounds like you're having a very rough time with your

mother, and now your son feels he has to step in. I don't know where

you live, but if there are mental health clinics in your area I would

see what they have to offer for support. (They'd probably have an idea

of where to go if they don't have anything) Also, it might be a good

idea to talk with your son. You have been dealing with your mother's

wrath for years, but from your posts it sounds like he's just starting

to experience it. At 16, we all think we can change the world on our

own. I'd hate to see him think that he can stop this by himself. The

more he understands about BPD, the more he'll be able to cope as well.

(This coming as a professional in the MH field and as a child of a BPD

parent) Your other option is a restraining order, which based on

tonight, might not be too bad of an idea. It's a horrible decision to

have to make. Hang tough... and that doesn't mean never crying.

There's strength in tears, even though most of us learned long ago

never to give tears as leverage. You can do it.

>

> well. just as posted yesterday. my MOTHER took my son shopping

> yesterday. she bought all three of my children a few things each. but

> just as i predicted...today was payback. after work i took my same son

> to visit a friend at the funeral home her, grandfather had past away.

> as soon as we got home, i could tell by the crazy ass look in her eyes

> that it was on. she demanded money that i supposedly owe her, i said

> you know, i don't really want to talk right now until you calm down.

> she went nuts. telling me what a sorry mother i am etc. my son 16yrs

> old got really upset...my 5 year old was crying.. it was bad. He was

> verbally defending me,,just telling her to stop it and leave me alone.

> she smacked at his face a couple of time,,missing thank god. he was so

> angry at so much of this going on so often and because she had finally

> pushed me to tears, i have been strong for so long now, but i finally

> broke down, he took a knife and stuck it in her trunk. OMG. she lost

> it now. so...we have told them (the cops our story) shes been talking

> to them forever. we are just sitting oun the porch waiting,,you know

> they need a shelter for families abused by BPD Mothers/grandmothers.

> lord how i wish i had somewhere to go.

>

[Guest guest]

I am wondering how it turned out . . . Anyway, I hope you live in a community

with resources and professionals who understand BPD.  My family had quite a bit

of involvement with the legal system awhile back.  My nada is so low-functioning

she did not have much credibility, despite her ability to speak and write

articulately.  It was this experience with her that caused me to go very LC. 

This caused to me learn my most important job is to protect myself and my

children.  Also, my husband is a divorce attorney.  I know from our experiences

that people with BPD can be very good at using the legal system and/or the

police to their advantage.  I don't mean to be negative.  I hope everything

turned out okay, Missy

Subject: The Cops are on their way here now.

To: WTOAdultChildren1

Date: Monday, August 4, 2008, 7:41 PM

well. just as posted yesterday. my MOTHER took my son shopping

yesterday. she bought all three of my children a few things each. but

just as i predicted... today was payback. after work i took my same son

to visit a friend at the funeral home her, grandfather had past away.

as soon as we got home, i could tell by the crazy ass look in her eyes

that it was on. she demanded money that i supposedly owe her, i said

you know, i don't really want to talk right now until you calm down.

she went nuts. telling me what a sorry mother i am etc. my son 16yrs

old got really upset...my 5 year old was crying.. it was bad. He was

verbally defending me,,just telling her to stop it and leave me alone.

she smacked at his face a couple of time,,missing thank god. he was so

angry at so much of this going on so often and because she had finally

pushed me to tears, i have been strong for so long now, but i finally

broke down, he took a knife and stuck it in her trunk. OMG. she lost

it now. so...we have told them (the cops our story) shes been talking

to them forever. we are just sitting oun the porch waiting,,you know

they need a shelter for families abused by BPD Mothers/grandmother s.

lord how i wish i had somewhere to go.

[Guest guest]

Also check out NAMI (google it) to find support in your community.  I'm sure

there are many resources to help you.  #1 priority, get outta there!  Time to

seek all resources, educate yourself and survive!  We are here for you, whatever

we can do.  Don't forget to ask us....I've seen that this group knows a lot and

a variety of resources come through!

 

Take Care Of You,

JaneSoul

The Cops are on their way here now.

To: WTOAdultChildren1

Date: Monday, August 4, 2008, 7:41 PM

   

            well.  just as posted yesterday.  my MOTHER took my son shopping

yesterday.  she bought all three of my children a few things each.  but

just as i predicted... today was payback.  after work i took my same son

to visit a friend at the funeral home her, grandfather had past away. 

as soon as we got home, i could tell by the crazy ass look in her eyes

that it was on.  she demanded money that i supposedly owe her, i said

you know, i don't really want to talk right now until you calm down. 

she went nuts.  telling me what a sorry mother i am etc.  my son 16yrs

old got really upset...my 5 year old was crying.. it was bad. He was

verbally defending me,,just telling her to stop it and leave me alone. 

she smacked at his face a couple of time,,missing thank god.  he was so

angry at so much of this going on so often and because she had finally

pushed me to tears, i have been strong for so long now, but i finally

broke down, he took a knife and stuck it in her trunk.  OMG.  she lost

it now.  so...we have told them (the cops our story)  shes been talking

to them forever.  we are just sitting oun the porch waiting,,you know

they need a shelter for families abused by BPD Mothers/grandmother s. 

lord how i wish i had somewhere to go.

     

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

   

     

[Guest guest]

Thanks so much everyone for the posts..this is really the only place

i have turn to at this point for support. It turned out better than

expected.. i couldn't go to work today, my eyes were to swollen from

crying and i feel completely numb and paralyzed if that makes any

sense at all. Luckily, i have the technology i need to work from

home, but i have not accomplished one single thing. the policeman

who came was very nice. My son is such a polite, good, christan

boy. He approached the officer first, the evil one (my mother was

further up in the driveway, chain smoking and glaring at us.) My son

explained the full story very truthfully. responding to the officer

with yes sir and no sir as he always does. he told him he knew what

he did was very wrong and that he had apologized to her and that he

would work in order to replace the trunk lid. then he went up to my

mother, i have no idea what she said, but, i am sure she poured on

the sugar and oh woe is me pitiful act. but get this,,,i don't think

he bought it. he (the officer) said well, its my call to make, and i

am not going to do anything about this, other than come by tomorrow

when my shift starts at 4 and see what he has gotten done around the

house. (he is mowing as i type this).. i was dumbfounded. my

mother said, so you are not taking him to juvenile..i couldb't

beleive she said this.. he said no i am not. then he came back to

me, i was still crying he said you know you all really should not

fight like that in front of the children. i said, i know...thats what

i trying to avoid, but the more i resisted getting into it with her

in the state she was in, she stood in the door of my bedroom glaring

and wouldn't let me pass through, it was downright scary. I told

her, you need help mom, of course, her mother who lives here too,

never once spoke up to defend me when she was telling me the whole

problem with everyone in the house is ME... its all MY fault. she

said some of the most hurtful things she has ever said, and that is

saying alot. The thing that I am afraid of is the fact that I

haven't ever had the custody of my 5 year old daughter switched back

to me, which is suppose to just be a formality, she (Mother) left

early this morning, no telling what she was up to. she did come back

with a rental car though. I have spent the morning on line looking

for somewhere to live. I just don't know how i will afford it, but i

have to do this for my childrens sake. i will work 2 jobs if i have

to and take the dead beat dad to court to MAKE him pay more child

support and on a regular basis. The Mother acts very pleased with

herself today, like the fat satisfied cat. I can't understand how i

could be any only child and there be this much hate between a mother

and daughter, i can't imagine treating any of my children this

way. Yet her big thing last night was she can't beleive the kind

of mother i am and how ashamed i should be for never having any money

and how i don't show an ounce of appreciation. I have already called

a dr. who is suppose to specialize in this...waiting still on a call

about an appointment. Dr. Spaulding, he has offices in

chattanooga nd alabama. anyone heard of him?? should i just keep my

distance as much as possible and ignore her, i can do this to an

extend even though we are in the same house. and to top it

off...tomorrow is my birthday.

>

> Subject: The Cops are on their way here now.

> To: WTOAdultChildren1

> Date: Monday, August 4, 2008, 7:41 PM

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>    

>             well.  just as posted yesterday.  my MOTHER took my son

shopping

>

> yesterday.  she bought all three of my children a few things each. 

but

>

> just as i predicted... today was payback.  after work i took my

same son

>

> to visit a friend at the funeral home her, grandfather had past

away. 

>

> as soon as we got home, i could tell by the crazy ass look in her

eyes

>

> that it was on.  she demanded money that i supposedly owe her, i

said

>

> you know, i don't really want to talk right now until you calm

down. 

>

> she went nuts.  telling me what a sorry mother i am etc.  my son

16yrs

>

> old got really upset...my 5 year old was crying.. it was bad. He

was

>

> verbally defending me,,just telling her to stop it and leave me

alone. 

>

> she smacked at his face a couple of time,,missing thank god.  he

was so

>

> angry at so much of this going on so often and because she had

finally

>

> pushed me to tears, i have been strong for so long now, but i

finally

>

> broke down, he took a knife and stuck it in her trunk.  OMG.  she

lost

>

> it now.  so...we have told them (the cops our story)  shes been

talking

>

> to them forever.  we are just sitting oun the porch waiting,,you

know

>

> they need a shelter for families abused by BPD Mothers/grandmother

s. 

>

> lord how i wish i had somewhere to go.

>

>

>

>

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