It's going to be a challenge...

[Guest guest]

" It's going to be a challenge and it's not going to get any better

from this point on. "

This is what my nada said last night while on a phone rant about her

93 year old father dealing with his difficult attitide in the

hospital this week. A nurse pulled she and her brother aside to

ask, " Is this always his personality? " Meaning, is he having a

reaction to medication or is he really this difficult normally? They

assured the nurse that this is his personality. My mother is agast

that he is treating the nurses so harshly, " Snap this gown back up!

Don't move that blanket! You're going to do that EVERY 15 MINUTES?!? "

She said this last night (during a rant that I was not allowed to

interrupt - I said, " We are having a conversation, right? " Her

response was, " No! I'm trying to tell you something! " )

Her full statement was, " He is not easy to deal with. It's going to

be a challenge and it's not going to get any better from this point

on. "

What a very consise description of how dealing with her has been and

is going to be as she continues to age.

Now the question is: How to I change the generational pattern more

than I already have?

I've only recently decided that if my grandpa isn't a BP, he's

certainly the one who helped get my mother there. He is a " do it my

way or hear about it later " type of guy. No physical abuse, but

demanding without understanding how people don't appreciate the

demands. Dinner has to be at a certain time or he is literally pacing

the floor behind you as you cook. Growing up, I thought he wasn't

the most huggy guy, but he loved his grandkids.

In a strange way, this gives me hope. Hope that my kids will still

like grandma and just see her as ornery like her dad, rather than a

controlling crazywoman like I do.