weird feeling about getting in shape

[Guest guest]

i have finally decided to really get in shape. i've been officially

exercising for 1.5 - 2 hrs a day and using my bike for transportation

on top of that. i'm also eating around 1600 calories a day, which is

downright sensible when you take into account the fact that my diet is

mostly vegetarian as it is. this has been really weird because i've

got plenty of motivation to do this. what has kept me from doing this

before?

i have been investigating this question and when i tell people how much

i exercise, it's like i'm expecting them to freak out on me. i find

myself offering the excuse, " well, i can always gain it back. " why am

i doing this? what is going on? my mom was quite the athlete in my

youth, but she has gained weight and is a bit chunky. i am paranoid

about when she notices my weight loss (4 lbs so far). has anyone else

had thoughts like this before? it's kind of weird to me that i feel

almost like i don't deserve to even try to lose weight.

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