Trying to Steal My Joy

[Guest guest]

Hey everyone. well ,, another huge scene at home. My son found " his

first car " i of course wanted to be a part in helping him get his

first car by co-signing. he was very excited, its a great deal 2000

for mustang. a young mans dream car. I had a very bad feeling all

day, that something very bad would go down when we got home. and i

was right. it started almost the instant i got home. i don't really

even know where to start or how to explain the chain of events. it

got so bad. she started off by informing me i didn't have good

enough credit to help him out, since i already have a loan out on my

car. but she came across like, how the hell do you think you can

help him? and escalated to you are worthless, always have been and

always will be. she even before attacking me called my son outside

to tell him just how sorry i was, about previous drug use and how she

is certain i still abuse drugs, and i will end up going to jail.

WTF??? true, i did abuse drugs years ago.. wonder why????????? but

sure don't now.. sometimes ,, thinking it would be a great escape

from this hell. but i know from experience, it doesn't help. shes

still here now matter how high i get. anyway, it was a terrible

fight, screaming, putting fingers in my face, all that. i said why

do you have to take away a happy time from him and me and turn it

into this, so it can all be about you.??? she offered to give him

the money, at an interest rate to be determined later. i told him,

please do NOT do this,, it would be a huge mistake, she will hold it

over your head forever. The next morning i got up at 4 am, trying to

get the swelling down in my eyes emough to go to work. i look

horrific with swollen, puffy eyes..not a first though. but, good

news we got the loan without her help. she acted happy, like nothing

ever even happened the night before. i refuse to allow her to black

mail my children for her HELP, like she has. me.