Interview with Asha Ramaia:

[Guest guest]

Interview with Asha Ramaia

Anyone who comes across the plight of Asha Ramaia (33) (National Advocacy

officer INP+) would naturally catch up confidence to swim against odds in his

life.

Asha, born in Bangalore, is living with HIV for a decade. The virus infected her

through her husband but later she was discarded by her in-laws. She was not

shown mercy by her family too who sent her out of their home. " It took some time

for me to realize where I was but this precarious position emboldened me to do

something for people like me " says Asha.

But Asha was pleasantly surprised to receive moral support from persons infected

with the same virus. She started to offer counseling and guidance to them. Even

her parents later started to support their daughter. Asha subsequently married

Ilango Ramachander, living with HIV.

The couples were convinced that with proper medical care, HIV Positive Couple

could deliver a baby without HIV. But still the fear haunted them despite their

follow up as advised by medical experts. Whey they finally had a male baby,

relief came to live with them as the child was free from HIV.

Presently holding the post of National Consultation Officer with the association

of people with HIV in India, she runs her life with the support of her family

members and friends. Excerpts from a special interview by S.Nagarathinam.

*What are the problems faced by HIV affected women?*

Women generally get with HIV only through their husbands. Afraid of the dire

consequences she would face, she hides the facts. The irony is that the very

person (husband) who is responsible for her infection always tries to cheat her

by driving her with tones of accusations. Husbands usually hide their HIV

existence and the same gets known to the wife only during the times of

pregnancy. In some cases when the husband dies due to AIDS, the in laws try to

avoid transferring any property of her husband indulging in mud slinging and

character assassination. One person who could offer compassion to her would be

certainly her mother. She is unwelcome in her brother's house to her sister in

law. So HIV/AIDS law is need of the hour.

*How do your association members help each other?*

It is unnatural to expect them to start moving with each other for some time.

But they shed their fear and inhibitions and start integrated into the system

slowly. Counseling helps them much in this regard.

*Why many HIV women resort to legal remedy?*

They live in such an environment. It is the last resort for them. Having got

into married life very early before 25, they enter into motherhood which also

happens with confirmation of her having AIDS. Driven to the streets, they have

no way except to rely on legal recourse.

*Your meeting the President ¦how do you recall it?*

It happened in August 2005 in Bangalore. He quizzed the citizens as to what

should India do to become a super power. I conveyed that every information

should be made available in one's mother tongue to facilitate easy availability

of medical care for the ordinary citizen. Later on one day, I received a call

from Rashtrapathi Bhavan. I was in heavy traffic inside an auto rickshaw. The

Secretary to the President was on the other line asking me to wait. Then came

the voice, " Madam do you know anybody here in the Rashtrapathy Bhavan? " I

replied in the negative. " I am Abdul Kalam speaking " said the caller. I was

voiceless. Then he asked my permission to use my email reply and photo for

quoting in public. When he did it in a function in Shillong, I was taken aback

by his sense of listening to everyone. His compassion towards the HIV affected

really mesmerized all of us. He is definitely a roll model to be emulated. It is

said women with HIV do not take their medicines properly True. The typical

Indian women mentality of apportioning everything to husband and children comes

here too. This leads to many other complications

..

*What would you like to tell womenfolk of this country?*

Education is foremost for your welfare and survival. The government should

bestow decision making powers to them. Legislations are required to curb

violence against us. This is my wish.

*Translation from original article published in Dinamalar, National Tamil

Newspaper*

" Indomitable Spirit " President Kalam's Speach at the HIV Conclave

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Interview with Asha appeared on “The record” in Kitchener, Canada

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Nagarathinam

e-mail: <snagarathinam@...>