Do I Need To See The Doctor?

November 22, 2000

I have discussed in a couple of letters now how I'm not doing great.

I am eating *way* more than I should be able to with 1ml in my

band but am really scared of getting more (when I went up last time

it caused a major slippage and ended up with me having

emergency surgery).

My intake is eratic - I had a plate *full* of tuna salad yesterday (not

sloppy stuff!) that I kept down no problems, but a few forks full of

spaghetti the night before ended up in the toilet ...

I've cut out all sweet things but I've totally stopped losing weight.

I'm trying to restrict my intake and also eat low-fat but nothing is

working! I feel hungry all the time (even after a big meal I am

hungry again two hours later). Also I can feel the old bulimic

tendencies returning (I was bulimic as a teenager). I go a couple of

days without food or throwing up (on purpose - very easy with the

band) only to binge (on anything soft that I know will go through the

band easily). I know this is worrying my family and my partner, but

I'm just desperate to get this weight off!

I have really bad knees as a result of a car accident and at this

stage I still can't exercise Even water aerobics are out of the

question because I have difficulty getting in and out of the pool!

What am I to do? I think Dr Fielding would order a barium swallow

to check the position of the pouch (my idea is that the band has

slipped again with the pouch in a funny position - sometimes

allowing lots in, other times only a little). Then I fear my fourth

surgery.

I'm full of disappointment that this hasn't worked as well as I had

hoped. Only a third of my weight gone in four years. I hate that I

have to be so careful with every mouthful of food - part of the reason

for getting this surgery done was so that I didn't have to diet! I

thought with the reduced intake of normal food the odd treat

wouldn't hurt!

I am at a loss. Any advice would be appreciated.

Thanks for letting me vent ...

Bye

Vicki Cleaver

vickicleaver@...

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