update about my appt. Grrrr

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Okay.... I've not given you all an update yet, mainly b/c I've been frustrated! First of all, thank you all for your thoughts -- I could feel you guys with me, getting me through the ordeal!!! So to sum it up the UCSF doc I saw said I do not have MS (okay, not too surprised there, given what the other neuros here have said). But then he went on to say that "you do not have MS and you never will have MS" Hmmmm. I was with him till that comment. My girlfriend later asked me if I got that from him in writing - like a warranty! LOL Okay, so never will have MS. He said he didn't know what the lesions in my brain were caused from. So I was relieved about the no MS, but.... what is going on then??? Then ..... this is

what made me really upset.... he wanted to UN-diagnose my RA! My Rheumatologist has been seeing me for over a year befor he diagnosed me! This doc only saw me once. He said my joints are not inflammed so I don't have RA.... ((no I'm not kidding!!) Well, i'm not currently in a flare, I'm on RA medication, and he only looked at my hands -- and he hasn't seen my blood work for RA. So I was getting quite upset -- but it got worse. I asked him why he thought my symptoms seem to be so similar to MS? Could my symptoms be my fibromyalgia seeming like MS? He said "many dr.s don't believe in fibromyalgia, and I am one of them." He further said "I think that most people with fibromyalgia are just depressed." Well, after this I just emotionally shut down. I was so upset. I know better than to believe

anyone that fibromyalgia does not exist... BUT, as I was sitting there, I'm thinking so he says I don't have MS - nor will I ever have MS, I don't have RA, and I don't have fibromyalgia b/c it doesn't exist!!!! Soooo --- why do I have lesions in my brain? why is my sed rate, CRP and rheumatoid factor throught the roof? why do I have sooooooo many symptoms..... I apologize if a lot of anger is coming through in this email... I guess I just really put a lot of expectation into this visit, and it was frustrating for me to be told these things. It would have been so much easier for me if he would have just said.... this isn't MS, you need to keep looking... When I asked, "so what do you think is going on with me?" he said that he thinks I have

a lupus-like autoimmune connective tissue disease. He wanted me to schedule a 6 month appt before I left -- I didn't think to ask him why I would need to do that if I don't have MS. So, some answers I got LOL. Thank you for the prayers --- I had a nail in my tire on the way down (I drove by myself) -- of course I didn't know I had a nail in my tire, but my front tire was losing air ... and most of the 5 hour drive is through rural mountainous area -- no services.... but as soon as I noticed the low tire, within 10 miles was a Les Schwab tire place and they patched it up. I was so grateful for the timing. It reminded me that I'm not alone. And everything is going to be okay. Thank you all for being here!! Kami