Thanks

[Guest guest]

Hi Elaine,

" Listening " is what this group is for!! And we have all had similar

experiences. I am so happy that you just didn't take this dr's word for it

and that you made an appointment with another allergist. In our changing

world of health care (I work in it, too), dr's are like an employee. You can

terminate their services if you are not satisfied. I encourage you to do

it!! I am lucky, because my allergist listens to me and he prescribed meds

that i said work best. He said to do whatever makes me feel comfortable

because I am the one suffering. Everyone deserves a dr who will work with

you. And, even though our condition is not terminal (usually), it greatly

affects our quality of life. Best of luck to you and your new allergist.

Just my 2 cents!

Cara J. in Ohio

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 7/25/2005 4:36:10 PM Eastern Standard Time,

dotf33j@... writes:

May the road rise up to meet you.

May the wind be always at your back.

May the sun shine warm upon your face

The rains fall soft upon your fields and until we meet agian,

may God hold you in the palm of His hand.

This is my prayer for all of my dear friends here on the forum.

Dot

Thanks Dot, just catching up after computer crash. Hope this finds you

feeling better during your recovery. My thoughts and prayers are with you too.

Debbie

[Guest guest]

Elaine

Somewhere along the line, I have lost track of what this court appearance is

for. I can certainly understand your reasons for not wanting to go, but I

almost think you should IF you know your dtr is going to rage - let them see

what she is really like!

Dot

_____

From: WTOParentsOfBPs

[mailto:WTOParentsOfBPs ] On Behalf Of Elaine

Sent: Friday, August 19, 2005 4:12 PM

To: WTOParentsOfBPs

Subject: thanks

Thanks for the support re: court. In Alberta family court is closed to all

except the interested parties. if I go the judge will have to get permission

from both sides for me to stay and I am not that interested in trying that.

I would rather not attend than be excluded and then hear it from her later

on that I didn't respect ehr privacy and boundaries, etc. It is probably

safer for me as well to not be present if it is bad from her point of view

as I could become the target of ehr rage even in public and I don't need the

hassle of chargin her or dealing with it.

It is true that as soon as she opens her mouth it is a lie, I doubt it was

the lawyer, it is likely she doesn't want me to hear evidence agaist her.

Here's to success for us in our ongoing journey of letting go

Elaine

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Hi Edie

Glad to get your name!

I checked my computer, but I must have deleted the contract we made with our

daughter. I think I have a copy of it somewhere, but it will take a bit to

rustle it up and I don't have a scanner. Let me know if you don't hear from

anyone else about their contracts and I'll retype it. It's not that long,

but definitely to the point!

It sounds like you're already doing a lot of good things. One of the things

you may need to check on is your auto insurance. When we dropped our

daughter from ours (too much drinking, etc.), we also had to go to the

insurance company and sign a statement (both her and I) saying that she

would not be driving our auto. They said this additional statement would

protect us from being liable for any accidents she was involved in with

other people's cars. Also, when she moved out of the house, we had to get a

copy of her driver's license showing her new address and proving she didn't

have access to our autos. This may or may not apply in your situation.

You seem to be well on your way to a much stronger mental health position

for yourself! And it is good that you and her doc can get together and

agree on her treatment, even if she won't cooperate. So many bp's of people

on this list simply do a snow job on the therapists and the counselors end

up believing the bp and NOT the parent! That's bad news, believe me.

Best to you,

Dot

[Guest guest]

Dear Edie:

What a strong and incredible woman you are! I can only imagine how difficult

this is for you and I will be praying for you and your family as you begin to

put up your boundaries and take care of yourself. It will be very difficult for

awhile but the good that can come out of it for all of you, including your

daughter, will be well worth it, as evidenced by many of the experiences shared

by others on this board!

Good luck!

Kelley C.

Bfreenowxo@... wrote:

Thanks for all the advice. I do understand what you are saying about the

contract and setting limits. I have already changed the locks on the house and

not given her a key. There is a garage code that she can use to get in to

the house up until her curfew time. After that time, the garage code will not

work (it is on a timer) and she can not get in. She already slept outside

one night when she tested it and I would not let her in. I have taken her car

away and I am in the process of trying to sell it. I don't trust her behind

the wheel of a car anymore and I refuse to pay her insurance premiums. I

told her when she can work and afford to pay for a car and insurance then she

can one. As far as college, she barely got through her freshman year and so I

told her that she can not go back until she goes for more help and gets

herself stable. I don't give her any money and I don't stay on top of her to

take her medicine anymore. I am slowly starting to remove myself from this

craziness to maintain my own sanity.

The idea of a formal contract is a good idea and I would love to see samples

of any contracts any of you have written. I would like to do that with

her. I am meeting with her doctor tonight and we are going to try one more

time

to convince her to go to an inpatient facility for 30 days to at least check

her medication and get more intensive therapy. Wish me luck

Frustrated Mom (Edie)

[Guest guest]

Thanks to everyone who responded to my post. Every comment was very helpful. I

feel a lot

more confident now in my purchases!

Also, I've been in remission since being on Remicade, so I'm not going to limit

myself with

any of the legal foods. There's not much that can make me flare while I'm on

Remicade.

" There is no specified schedule for introducing foods with the exception of

homemade

yogurt. Some people may appreciate suggested guidelines but they are not

generally

required. " - BTVC

[Guest guest]

Hi Sandy,

I agree with a lot of what you said. I had the attitude when starting

the diet that I didn't 'need' the intro diet, nor did I 'need' to

introduce foods slowly and the easiest to digest ones first. 2 1/2

months later I just did the intro diet. I'm now slowly adding foods

in. I really do think it helps in healing (try and eat lots of homemad

broths and yogurt to help this healing process). Even if meds are

giving you a reprieve from symptoms, you still need to heal. And the

goal would be to get off the meds anyway, which may take time but

would be better done by healing yourself as much as possible with the

diet.

I have IBS which technically means I don't have disease showing

(although I haven't had a scope of any kind). I thought because of

this I could just dive right in to raw fruits and veggies, and lots of

nuts. Let me tell ya, it hurt. Both my stomach and my pride lol. I

really had to just give in and realize that yes indeed I would have to

take things slowly. Now all I think of is, what if I did this starting

2 1/2 months ago? Would I be even more healed now and then maybe I

would have been enjoying better food later this summer? So I do

encourage you and everyone to go slowly. Beware of how much fiber is

in these fruits, veggies, and nuts especially. I overdid it on the

nuts and many people make that mistake.

I hope that helps you on your way,

Kat

" IBS " (undiagnosed)

SCD since Jan 2008

http://scdkatfood.blogspot.com/

[Guest guest]

Thank you, just the reinforcement that I needed to hear! after my day of big D. sunday, I went back to the regular, cooked apples, chicken soup, and zuchinni! Going to go smaller portions and easy on the raw stuff, like you say so I can enjoy more of the fresh stuff this summer! Thanks again for your story. sandy scd since november 2007 uc since 2004scdkat wrote: Hi Sandy, I agree with a lot of what you said. I had the

attitude when startingthe diet that I didn't 'need' the intro diet, nor did I 'need' tointroduce foods slowly and the easiest to digest ones first. 2 1/2months later I just did the intro diet. I'm now slowly adding foodsin. I really do think it helps in healing (try and eat lots of homemadbroths and yogurt to help this healing process). Even if meds aregiving you a reprieve from symptoms, you still need to heal. And thegoal would be to get off the meds anyway, which may take time butwould be better done by healing yourself as much as possible with thediet.I have IBS which technically means I don't have disease showing(although I haven't had a scope of any kind). I thought because ofthis I could just dive right in to raw fruits and veggies, and lots ofnuts. Let me tell ya, it hurt. Both my stomach and my pride lol. Ireally had to just give in and realize that yes indeed I would have totake things slowly. Now

all I think of is, what if I did this starting2 1/2 months ago? Would I be even more healed now and then maybe Iwould have been enjoying better food later this summer? So I doencourage you and everyone to go slowly. Beware of how much fiber isin these fruits, veggies, and nuts especially. I overdid it on thenuts and many people make that mistake.I hope that helps you on your way,Kat"IBS" (undiagnosed)SCD since Jan 2008http://scdkatfood.blogspot.com/