Re: I need some help and advice

[Guest guest]

Randy wrote:

> \> The problem I have now is I am lonely and have a ton of time of my

> hands. But, i wake up and wonder what I am going to do for the day and my

> weekends suck.

Hi Randy -

If you have the time and ability to volunteer, there are LOTS of opportunities

out there!

What did you do for work? What were your special skills or things you love to

do? For example, I love animals, so I volunteer for our local no-kill animal

shelter. I used to help by doing a lot of physical labor, which I can't do

anymore, so now I'm using my professional expertise and helping with their

marketing and public relations.

I also love to read, so I also volunteer with our local NPR radio station in a

special program where volunteers record readings of the local newspapers in the

area to be broadcast on a special signal for the visually impaired. We can get

national news on the radio or TV, but you can't get the local stuff - the city

council meetings, the obituaries and marriages, the junior high school

volleyball team game reports, the police and fire reports, all that kind of

stuff! - so this keeps the blind and home-bound connected to their community.

It's a lot of fun. I only read/record for one hour a week, but they have need

for someone every single day for hours on end to fill the airtime! We cover

about 15 counties in my area, so there are lots of little local papers to read.

Almost every NPR station in the country has this program - just call and ask if

your local station has a " Radio Information Service " program.

You could be a Big Brother if you like mentoring kids, or find the local

literacy program and volunteer to tutor an illiterate adult to learn to read, or

you could take your guitar and volunteer to perform at a nursing home. Call your

local United Way and ask them for a list of volunteer opportunities if you don't

know where else to start.

The need is endless and volunteering is a great way to make friends and feel

useful.

Good luck!

Cheryl in AZ

Moderator

[Guest guest]

its great except when you don't have transportation and i have tried.

>Cheryl in AZ wrote:

The need is endless and volunteering is a great way to make friends and feel

useful.

[Guest guest]

Write. Write and write some more. You would not believe how much I

chat in e-mails when my pain is cranking up at 10 plus and it is

either that or cry and crying makes my already wonky heart act up. You

also would not believe how much I hold onto e-mails from others

hurting worse than me, or like me, or just out there and also needing

someone else to be there and keep touch.

Write in a journal. Everything. Don't bother trying to refine the

sentence structure or gloss over what you're feeling. I've gone back

over some of my entries from this past summer from hell and thought

" Damn, I made it. " Unfortunately my Crohn's isn't in remission and the

pain still cranks up there to 10's at night and right now it is a

wimpy 5, so it is easier to deal with. Like your back problem, it is

something which has periods of not hurting as much interspaced with

periods of hurting bad enough to not want to take that next breath.

Just knowing others understand PAIN because they live with it helps me

more than I can say. Even when the pain is so bad that I'm sweating

hard and puking in a bucket next to the computer, just reading from

you guys and the other groups I'm on helps me hang on.

They hung on and made it through to the next round of pain, so I hold

on as well.

We're all really good and at the same time really lousy (in our own

eyes) at dealing with the monsters in our bodies.We're best at holding

each other up when we need, kicking our butts when we need that or

just letting us vent when we need to do that.

I love this group and everyone in it. So...write. You Are Not Alone.

We're here. So what if we can't be there in body. You'd feel obligated

to amusing us and making sure we had food and drink when all you want

to do is sit or lay there on the heating pad sweating through the pain

enough to be able to get up and answer the phone or door.

Love, hugs, Jeanne B in GA

[Guest guest]

Randy I found myself in the same boat when I went on disability. I finally

realized I had to get out somehow. I volunteer as a fire police officer and an

EMT with our local fire comp. It has been a major help keeps mind off feeling

depressed and helps manage my chronic pain.

I also read a lot and use our library's book mobile weekly.

Gentle hugs, Tami

Randy wrote:

The problem I have now is I am lonely and have a ton of time of my

hands.

[Guest guest]

I've learned that when our will is greater than our discontent, we find a way.

Lori

[Guest guest]

Does this affect your disability in any way or would it if they found out? I'm

nervous of certain things because I've heard storys of people having their

disability cut off cuz they were found doing something that they shouldn't

according to their own words and the docs words

> Tami wrote:

> I found myself in the same boat when I went on disability. I finally realized

I had to get out somehow. I volunteer as a fire police officer and an EMT with

our local fire comp. It has been a major help keeps mind off feeling depressed

and helps manage my chronic pain.

[Guest guest]

It will vary from person to person and what the diagnoses are. I know for some

of my family members volunteering is part of thier social therapy. Of course

the physical aspects of what we/they can do are limited. SSDI does encourage

some to work minimal amounts of part time as long as it doesn't exceed a certain

dollar amount. You'll want to make sure the volunteer work is something not as

excessive as even part time work and within the limits of your disability.

>

> Does this affect your disability in any way or would it if they found out?

I'm nervous of certain things because I've heard storys of people having their

disability cut off cuz they were found doing something that they shouldn't

according to their own words and the docs words

>

[Guest guest]

Not every volunteer opportunity requires that you travel. I'm doing all the

strategic planning for our local no-kill shelter right on my home computer and

via email. It's true that people won't come seek you out asking for you to do

work for them, but if you're willing to seek out the opportunities yourself,

they're there.

Cheryl in AZ

Moderator

--- Catseyes66@... wrote:

>

>

> its great except when you don't have transportation and i have tried.

>

>

> >Cheryl in AZ wrote:

>

> The need is endless and volunteering is a great way to make friends and feel

useful.

>

[Guest guest]

Jeanne B wrote:

> Write. Write and write some more. You would not believe how much I

> chat in e-mails when my pain is cranking up at 10 plus and it is

> either that or cry and crying makes my already wonky heart act up. You

> also would not believe how much I hold onto e-mails from others

> hurting worse than me, or like me, or just out there and also needing

> someone g us vent when we need to do that.

>

> I love this group and everyone in it. So...write. You Are Not Alone.

> We're here. So what if we can't be there in body. You'd feel obligated

> to amusing us and making sure we had food and drink when all you want

> to do is sit or lay there on the heating pad sweating through the pain

> enough to be able to get up and answer the phone or door.

>

> Love, hugs, Jeanne B in GA

>

>

------Jeanne,

I admire you for dealing with Chrons, my ex husband had it and I have never seen

someone in so much pain.

I hope for you remission and the ability to keep your pain levels low. I just

wanted you to know I am thinking of

you and hope less pain.

I just came back from driving six hours to see my Dad who is 94 and he discussed

his will and what the three sisters would get.

It was very emotional and I have a very dysfunctional family.

My Doctor had given me cortisone for a fungal infection and I had a reaction and

was having hives , aggression, and was not sleeping.

My SIsters were calling me a drug addict even though they saw the hives and told

me I love you take care of your self but no on took me

to the hospital and told me I should go.

I am the Executor and my one SIster accused me of hiding monies from her etc etc

etc. Hell this stress almost killed me. My older sister left

early and flew home because my Dad grabbed her and was yelling.

I hat these toxic relationships and thanks for letting me vent. Take care

Jeanne. Bennie

[Guest guest]

Randy wrote:

> Hello To everybody,

> Hi I have belonged to this group now for a number of years and I am

> hoping someone who maybe has been through this can help me. I am single,

> not by choice, and I live alone. I no longer can work due to Pain from

> my 7 back surgeries. I dont have a Pet, because i would have a dog but I

> am not able to walk it.

> The problem I have now is I am lonely and have a ton of time of my

> hands. I play guitar and have for years, so that hobby takes up some

> time. But, i wake up and wonder what I am going to do for the day and my

> weekends suck. The one idea i thought of was to try to volunteer

> somewhere like maybe the hospital by me. But there's not a lot there for

> me to do, right now at least.\

Randy,

I talk to the TV all the time and family don't like to hear about my pain.

Randy, I am a animal rescue volunteer and many dogs who are older do not need

walking and are " lap dogs " There is a huge need for fosters or homes for them to

live out their lives with love and caring. You can also find volunteer dog

walkers. I think what a dog would give out weighs it not being walked.

It is much better in a home rather in crate and lonely also. You might want to

consider a trial period and many rescues do this. I belong to a cairn terrier

rescue groups and westie group.

You might give it a try Randy. They are the reason I get up and they love me

unconditionally. Let us know . Bennie

O

[Guest guest]

>Tami wrote:

> Randy I found myself in the same boat when I went on disability. I finally

realized I had to get out somehow. I volunteer as a fire police officer and an

EMT with our local fire comp. It has been a major help keeps mind off feeling

depressed and helps manage my chronic pain.

>

> I also read a lot and use our library's book mobile weekly.

Tami,

That is great but hope you are not lifting etc. I have heard of people reporting

others because they are doing things they thought someone on disability should

not be doing.

I agree you have to have something to do. I volunteer with animal rescue,

writing grants and others things that does not require me going out. I did hear

from one member applying for disability that SSI has people checking Facebook

accounts where you might state that you went on a long vacation and post

pictures of you lifting items etc that you applied for disability and stated you

could not do.

I do not worry about this and with your intelligence you can deal with it but

sometimes I wonder if people do report others. Thank you for volunteering as it

takes all of us and I agree with you.

My husband just got a Kindle to read a lot but I am interested in the audio

books, I used to listen to them when I traveled and am wondering if Santa will

bring me the audio reading unit. I don't know as my eyes get tired and vision

needs to be focused.

Bennie

[Guest guest]

((((((((((Bennie))))))))

Thanks for you concern. I don't lift because of the arthitis in my shoulders.

I can't even get the litter out of the truck because it battery operated and is

heavy. I explain my inability to lift to who every I am with. there is usually

a police office who responds also. They are very good about helping with

lifting. In worse case we can call the county dispacter and have they call for

fire to help with lifting.

Everyone is very understanding about my limitations. I had to switch to daytime

shift because it is too cold at night now and my pain level shoots up in the

cold. I only run 1 short shift a week which the everyone understands is all I

can manage. We only average 1 or 2 calls when I am on.

I do know what you mean about people trying to report others on disability

because they think we should all be lying in bed wanting to rot away! lol

I asked for the kindle fire for christmas. Our libary now how e books you can

borrow. I love reading! For me it is great on those days when I am fatigued

(which is increasingly more often).

You can drop me an email anytime if you are at a lose for something to do.

Big hugs, Tami

> That is great but hope you are not lifting etc. I have heard of people

reporting others because they are doing things they thought someone on

disability should not be doing.

>

[Guest guest]

>Tami wrote:

> ((((((((((Bennie))))))))

> Everyone is very understanding about my limitations. I had to switch to

daytime shift because it is too cold at night now and my pain level shoots up in

the cold. I only run 1 short shift a week which the everyone understands is all

I can manage. We only average 1 or 2 calls when I am on.

>

> I do know what you mean about people trying to report others on disability

because they think we should all be lying in bed wanting to rot away! lol

>

> I asked for the kindle fire for Christmas. Our library now how e books you

can borrow. I love reading! For me it is great on those days when I am

fatigued (which is increasingly more often).

Tami,

I know what you mean about the cold. We finally got rain here in Austin Tx but

last night it was cold, rainy, and humid, Boy, did I get a fibro flare and I am

under the electric blanker battling swollen feet, fingers and my " fire in the

butt' is my main pain problem and it is my sciatica and sacral iliac syndrome.

It seems I get everything settled in my body and something else tries to flare

up. I am going to start naming my pain problems. My sciatica is going to be the

" fire in the butt " , my spine problems with bending because of the metal in my

back is going to be " metal mania " and the general fatigue that makes you go

under the bed and hide for days is going to be named " Everyone go away pain " .

I admire you Tami for hanging in there and glad you have the support that you

have. My husband got the Nook and he is a computer programmer and compares items

and thinks about them for a long time . He says the Nook has better definition

and all these other things so you might want to check that : )

He buys things of Amazon.com and gets good prices and shipping is fast. I signed

my animal volunteer rescue group, CRUSA, Cairn Terrier Rescue USA and I GIVE

gives a certain portion of what we buy to them. You can sign up your favorite

charity when buying online and it makes us feel we are giving in a small

portion.

I agree you have to have a sense of purpose and there are many opportunities to

volunteer and most understand limitations and will thane whatever volunteer

hours you can give . You can type on the computer and do reports, contacts, call

others and still lie in the bed while volunteering. : )

I hope Santa is good to you and I read our posts all the time and always smile

when I see compassionate members encouraging others as encouragement costs

nothing and means so much and as I have said many times, this group and the

members are lifesavers.

I will e mail you and see what Santa brought. Stay warm. When I lived up North,

I had electric socks and my husband rides his motorcycle to work and has a

heated suit so you might do that . lol Take care Tami and thanks for the

encouragement.

Bennie