Guest guest Posted January 4, 2008 Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 I feel so horribly sad, almost grief stricken. I guess I am coming to terms with the fact that I may have this body for ever. I have always hated my body and always held out the hope that the diet (whichever one I happened to be on) would change it and I would be happy (or at least less miserable)with it. I've been doing so much reading, and I'm trying to gently teach myself to actually look at my body and accept it. It's so f*cking hard, and today I just felt overwhelmed with grief, that this is probably it. How ccan I learn to love and accept that which has been the centre of my problems and depression for ever, seriously since I was a child. I just don't know if I can do it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 4, 2008 Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 It sounds like this might be your first step to doing just that. I think it is normal to grieve and have some sadness about letting go of the ideal image we have in our heads. I would embrace it, not run from it and you will see light at the end of the tunnel. Hang in there! --Alana -------------- Original message -------------- I feel so horribly sad, almost grief stricken. I guess I am coming to terms with the fact that I may have this body for ever. I have always hated my body and always held out the hope that the diet (whichever one I happened to be on) would change it and I would be happy (or at least less miserable)with it.I've been doing so much reading, and I'm trying to gently teach myself to actually look at my body and accept it. It's so f*cking hard, and today I just felt overwhelmed with grief, that this is probably it. How ccan I learn to love and accept that which has been the centre of my problems and depression for ever, seriously since I was a child. I just don't know if I can do it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 4, 2008 Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 You don't have to accept your weight as it is. I don't know what I weigh, but, it is over 140,(my high weight in high school). Maybe 190.I know because I have tried several things and you can eat whatever you want. Many people have told me that I have lost a lot of weight. Really, what I would do first is see your medical provider and see what he or she has to say. Usually, even one iota of the information he or she would give you is worth the office visit. My medical provider told me to quit the fast food. That helped the cholesterol a lot. She also told me once you hit 40, good health/weight isn't a freebie anymore. I think you should talk with a medical provider that will take care of you. That's what the one I had did. It worked as a good first step. God Bless and Take care. Helen > > I feel so horribly sad, almost grief stricken. I guess I am coming to > terms with the fact that I may have this body for ever. I have always > hated my body and always held out the hope that the diet (whichever one > I happened to be on) would change it and I would be happy (or at least > less miserable)with it. > > I've been doing so much reading, and I'm trying to gently teach myself > to actually look at my body and accept it. It's so f*cking hard, and > today I just felt overwhelmed with grief, that this is probably it. How > ccan I learn to love and accept that which has been the centre of my > problems and depression for ever, seriously since I was a child. > > I just don't know if I can do it! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 4, 2008 Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 I once heard an amazing tape recording of a woman named Clarissa Pinkola Estes about celebrating our wonderful roundness! It is called the Joyous Body. I will see how to access that and try to share it with the group - and myself, as I totally get what you are saying. Hang in there! Nyna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 4, 2008 Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 Dubby, I feel ya on this issue. Almost 2 years ago I made a dual comittment to IE and to working out regularly, and I distinctly remember sitting on my couch thinking, " In one year's time, my life can be DIFFERENT, " meaning in one year's time, I could make these two changes and suddenly BE the body I always wanted to be. It didn't happen - I got healthier in my head, my heart got healthy, my muscles got healthy, my relationship with food got healthy, but my DRESS SIZE hasn't really changed that much. Getting a year down this road and realizing this may well be the body I have through the rest of my life was AWFUL... at first. But as I came to understand more about the " fit at any size " concept and as my doctor reinforced that I'm doing EVERYTHING right, in spite of my size, then I came to slowly deal with the fact that I'm NEVER going to be on the cover of Fitness Magazine, never going to be able to have a conversation with someone about working out (be- cause they take one look at me and assume I'm lying!), and never going to be able to even shop in a department other than " plus size. " And ya' know what? Big Hairy Deal. As my doctor says, people come in all sizes and shapes. We don't let our CHILDREN tease other people who are not supermodel shape, but WE do it to ourselves every single day, and what's that all about?! How come we are so compassionate to those around us and reserve the true beatings for ourselves? I think all we can do is the best we can do and then we have to forgive our DNA. It is what it is. I'm going to do everything in my power to keep my body as healthy and happy as I can and to act as compassionately to MYSELF as I do to others, and in the end I think that is probably the best and highest any one of us can do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 4, 2008 Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 Thank you. That was a great post. The important thing is to take care of yourself. It took me a long time to gain the weight and if it takes me a long time to lose it, so what. I will never be tiny. Never was, never will be. God Bless and Take care. Helen > > Dubby, I feel ya on this issue. Almost 2 years > ago I made a dual comittment to IE and to working > out regularly, and I distinctly remember sitting > on my couch thinking, " In one year's time, my life > can be DIFFERENT, " meaning in one year's time, I > could make these two changes and suddenly BE the > body I always wanted to be. It didn't happen - > I got healthier in my head, my heart got healthy, > my muscles got healthy, my relationship with food > got healthy, but my DRESS SIZE hasn't really > changed that much. Getting a year down this > road and realizing this may well be the body I > have through the rest of my life was AWFUL... > at first. But as I came to understand more about > the " fit at any size " concept and as my doctor > reinforced that I'm doing EVERYTHING right, in > spite of my size, then I came to slowly deal with > the fact that I'm NEVER going to be on the cover > of Fitness Magazine, never going to be able to have > a conversation with someone about working out (be- > cause they take one look at me and assume I'm > lying!), and never going to be able to even shop > in a department other than " plus size. " > > And ya' know what? Big Hairy Deal. As my doctor > says, people come in all sizes and shapes. We > don't let our CHILDREN tease other people who are > not supermodel shape, but WE do it to ourselves > every single day, and what's that all about?! > How come we are so compassionate to those around > us and reserve the true beatings for ourselves? > > I think all we can do is the best we can do and > then we have to forgive our DNA. It is what it is. > I'm going to do everything in my power to keep my > body as healthy and happy as I can and to act as > compassionately to MYSELF as I do to others, and > in the end I think that is probably the best and > highest any one of us can do. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 4, 2008 Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 I am sorry you feel so sad. But also, maybe this is a good thing-actually feeling the sadness, not eating it away. You can do this...you can. grief I feel so horribly sad, almost grief stricken. I guess I am coming to terms with the fact that I may have this body for ever. I have always hated my body and always held out the hope that the diet (whichever one I happened to be on) would change it and I would be happy (or at least less miserable)with it.I've been doing so much reading, and I'm trying to gently teach myself to actually look at my body and accept it. It's so f*cking hard, and today I just felt overwhelmed with grief, that this is probably it. How ccan I learn to love and accept that which has been the centre of my problems and depression for ever, seriously since I was a child. I just don't know if I can do it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 4, 2008 Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 Big hugs to you as you continue on this journey. I am not even close to that stage yet, so I can't relate but I do hope that you are able to get through your grief. > > I feel so horribly sad, almost grief stricken. I guess I am coming to > terms with the fact that I may have this body for ever. I have always > hated my body and always held out the hope that the diet (whichever one > I happened to be on) would change it and I would be happy (or at least > less miserable)with it. > > I've been doing so much reading, and I'm trying to gently teach myself > to actually look at my body and accept it. It's so f*cking hard, and > today I just felt overwhelmed with grief, that this is probably it. How > ccan I learn to love and accept that which has been the centre of my > problems and depression for ever, seriously since I was a child. > > I just don't know if I can do it! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 4, 2008 Report Share Posted January 4, 2008 APPLAUSE!!!! You are so right and I love this post. Bravo for you darling ehugs, Katcha > > Dubby, I feel ya on this issue. Almost 2 years > ago I made a dual comittment to IE and to working > out regularly, and I distinctly remember sitting > on my couch thinking, " In one year's time, my life > can be DIFFERENT, " meaning in one year's time, I > could make these two changes and suddenly BE the > body I always wanted to be. It didn't happen - > I got healthier in my head, my heart got healthy, > my muscles got healthy, my relationship with food > got healthy, but my DRESS SIZE hasn't really > changed that much. Getting a year down this > road and realizing this may well be the body I > have through the rest of my life was AWFUL... > at first. But as I came to understand more about > the " fit at any size " concept and as my doctor > reinforced that I'm doing EVERYTHING right, in > spite of my size, then I came to slowly deal with > the fact that I'm NEVER going to be on the cover > of Fitness Magazine, never going to be able to have > a conversation with someone about working out (be- > cause they take one look at me and assume I'm > lying!), and never going to be able to even shop > in a department other than " plus size. " > > And ya' know what? Big Hairy Deal. As my doctor > says, people come in all sizes and shapes. We > don't let our CHILDREN tease other people who are > not supermodel shape, but WE do it to ourselves > every single day, and what's that all about?! > How come we are so compassionate to those around > us and reserve the true beatings for ourselves? > > I think all we can do is the best we can do and > then we have to forgive our DNA. It is what it is. > I'm going to do everything in my power to keep my > body as healthy and happy as I can and to act as > compassionately to MYSELF as I do to others, and > in the end I think that is probably the best and > highest any one of us can do. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 5, 2008 Report Share Posted January 5, 2008 I know exactly what you mean- I too have dieted and worried about my appearance since childhood. I've dieted for so long and worried about my weight for so long that it's like a hobby and now that I can no longer participate in this hobby it can be depressing. It's like, if I'm not dieting, then what??? I'm sure that feeling won't last long though- that the feeling of being free of it all will soon outweigh the bad. You CAN make it though this. We can do this together! grief I feel so horribly sad, almost grief stricken. I guess I am coming to terms with the fact that I may have this body for ever. I have always hated my body and always held out the hope that the diet (whichever one I happened to be on) would change it and I would be happy (or at least less miserable)with it.I've been doing so much reading, and I'm trying to gently teach myself to actually look at my body and accept it. It's so f*cking hard, and today I just felt overwhelmed with grief, that this is probably it. How ccan I learn to love and accept that which has been the centre of my problems and depression for ever, seriously since I was a child. I just don't know if I can do it! Never miss a thing. Make Yahoo your homepage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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